Your understanding and experience matches mine almost word for word.
My experience of how God ordained his church to work started back in the mid70s, just like Paul describes below.-
1Cor14v26How is it then, brethren? when ye come together, everyone of you hath a psalm, hath a doctrine, hath a tongue, hath a revelation, hath an interpretation. Let all things be done unto edifying.
27If any man speak in an unknown tongue, let it be by two, or at the most by three, and that by course; and let one interpret.
28But if there be no interpreter, let him keep silence in the church; and let him speak to himself, and to God.
29Let the prophets speak two or three, and let the other judge.
30If any thing be revealed to another that sitteth by, let the first hold his peace.
31For ye may all prophesy one by one, that all may learn, and all may be comforted.
32And the spirits of the prophets are subject to the prophets.
That is the very same verse our home group used to quote to encourage the 'whole gathering' to participate, and I almost threw that verse into my last post.

We were part of a group which met for 10 of the most spiritually powerful years of my Christian walk. It was a group that had such a reputation for God moving so powerfully that the pastor got scared that we'd break away and start our own 'church'

So he forced all the home groups to shut down, to pursue his newest 'idea'. It still saddens my heart to this day that we submitted to his authority, as our
pastor. Several years later he admitted to the homeowner whose house we met at, that he then knew he had made a mistake. And that church suffered adversely for it. He simply quenched the anointing of the Spirit which we had. Our home group even had
idiote people from 'our church' who, even though they never received the baptism from the Spirit with the manifestation of supernatural tongues, they still believed in it and knew it was real. They would come to 'our group' meetings for several weeks seeking personal ministry. It was truly amazing that this group, which had about 15 faithful regulars for years, would consistently have 20 or so showing up every week. Those desiring help would come, receive and disappear. We often talked about what we would do if one night we'd have 50 or whatever all come back at once. But it never did happen, that was 'just God', we felt.
I have learned to trust the way God ministers through the whole body, not just one expert at the front.
I love to see the gifts of the Spirit being manifest amongst the body.
I love to see how the gifts enable everyone to grow in maturity as they learn to hear their Heavenly Father's whisper.
He certainly used most of us in that group. But there were always those who refused to grow into their potential. Usually it would be a 'mate' of one or the other, in a marriage. That always puzzled me too. How they could be around it so much, be encouraged to participate, receive teaching on doing more spiritually....but then not. That's almost as vexing for me as the
idiote Christians we deal with here. So, no, I don't laugh at all about how their minds have been taken captive by the enemy.
The idea that it all ended when the apostles died is laughable.
Not to me.

I actually am
saddened by how effectually the devil has veiled the eyes of those who are so anti-Christ that I'm convinced that, even though born-again healthy, even the family God can have retarded children, who were just dropped too hard for their head after a healthy birth. And, when I say
anti-Christ, I'm not meaning they aren't still Christians and fight against Jesus the Christ, at all. I'm just defining the '
compound word'
anti-christ as the Greek so strongly supports.
Anti in the Greek is defined as
opposite, but also contained in the definition is the understanding that it means
'instead or
because of'. And it's often used in composition to denote '
contrast', '
substitution'. IOW an
IMITATION. And the word
christos comes from the root word meaning '
to smear or rub with oil' and is translated as
anointing. So, in reality their anti-christo teaching, presents and
IMITATION ANOINTING concerning spiritual things, which they've never experienced.