If I embrace being single, am I dooming myself?

[bluegreysky]

If I embrace being single and look at it as empowerment and encourage myself and other people to feel whole without having a "other half"
and really just make the most of it because it's what I got...

...I know its a healthy outlook but is it going to doom me to being single forever? (because someone will look at me and be like "oh she likes being single I'll leave her alone")

 

[Miss Spaulding]

No, absolutely not. I believe very few people are truly called to live a life of singleness. None of us know when, how and where God will bring that special someone into our life, so instead of completely putting out lives on hold and focusing all of our attention on a particular empty area of our life (in your case, a lack of a boyfriend/husband), we need to trust that area of our life, and all areas, to God and move forward. Putting all of our focus, or worrying and fretting over a particular area in our life literally makes that focus an 'idle' in our life...and that's wrong.

Choosing a content and trusting attitude about your singleness is the very best attitude to have, don't let anyone change that or make you feel bad about it. There are SO many incredible ways God uses those who are single. This is the truth.

 

[IamStefanie]

No ma'am it won't. In my opinion, are you living your BEST life. You are not putting your enjoyment on hold until that man comes along. You are taking advantage of the time to do all that God wants you to do. Enjoying Him by yourself, living your life on your own terms in a sense. I think you could be an inspiritation to many single folks who are down about being single. I meet so many of them. I have been in that dump position myself, so no, you are not dooming yourself. Keep encouraging yourself. If God sees fit for you to marry, the opportunity will come to you beautifully. God bless you.

 

[broken_one]

You might lose some guys who have serious intentions, yes.

 

[Jonny Doe]

If you believe there's a reason for everything and you're walking with God, you have to believe that there's a purpose for the season of singleness you're in.

I see embracing singlehood as a time that God is preparing you. He's preparing His child to lean on Him, depend on Him, built your foundation on Him. He's getting us ready so we can limit or make no mistakes, because many of us who have made them know how devastating the consequences and memories can be.

Imagine How much He loves you that He doesn't place someone in your life yet when you're not ready. I tend to believe that people shouldn't date/court until they're ready to get married. Until they meet someone who they can say this is someone i can see myself marrying. Many times we have the wrong motives, and trick ourselves into believing that a gf/bf is going to make us happy, even if it's temporary. I believe strongly that we need to have the right, God-honoring values and mindset when entering into a relationship because if we don't, it can turn out to be a sad ending.

No, i don't think embracing singlehood means you're doomed to be single forever. The only way you could do that is if you remain closed off all the time, lying to yourself that you were meant to be single even though your heart longs for companionship.

 

[toastface_grillah]

No way! If you embrace singleness, that means you're living your life and living it to the full, instead of putting it on hold until Mr. Right comes along. That's great, because it shows you have more going on than sitting vigil for a significant other, and won't be the type to put your life on hold once he does come along.

 

[MacFall]

Depends on what you mean by "embracing" it. If you mean just being okay with it and trying to take something positive out of it, that may work fine for you. Not everyone can do that and those who can are blessed, I think. But if you mean actually wanting to be single and eschewing the alternative, then yes - you can be pretty certain you'll stay single. I've learned the hard way not to express interest in women who say they like being single, and I would imagine that most other men have, too.

 

[7angels]

like what was said before. ask yourself why you are doing this? if it is for God's glory and you feel led by the Lord then you have nothing to worry about because everything will work out for your good.

if you are doing this because it worked for another person or because you want too then you need to start looking to God and praying for repentance and forgiveness and then ask God to show you what his plan is for your life and what the best way is to go about preparing for it.

just remember that if you are being led by the Lord then don't second guess yourself but jump right in because God makes all things work to our good.

God bless

 

[redblue22]

Hands down, most guys I know take the "I'm happy single" type-comments to mean she hasn't met anyone, she wants to play the field, and she has no interest in you. Same thing for so-called "I want to be a missionary" or "I want to be a pastor's wife" comments. My personal favorite is hearing a girl go on about how she doesn't date.

maybe someone pan up some A/V of various rejection lines Christian girls use.

 

[redblue22]

like what was said before. ask yourself why you are doing this? if it is for God's glory and you feel led by the Lord then you have nothing to worry about because everything will work out for your good.

just remember that if you are being led by the Lord then don't second guess yourself but jump right in because God makes all things work to our good.

God bless

Where's pic of Christians being fed to the lions when you need one.....

 

[Blank123]

Nope.

 

[Im_A]

If I embrace being single and look at it as empowerment and encourage myself and other people to feel whole without having a "other half"
and really just make the most of it because it's what I got...

...I know its a healthy outlook but is it going to doom me to being single forever? (because someone will look at me and be like "oh she likes being single I'll leave her alone")

Well you can't control how others see you based on a simple affirmation of something that you seem for whatever reason cannot control.

I vote for having a positive outlook on your current situation. For all the people that could hypothetically look down on you for having confidence in your life situation, you will find the same amount if not more that may find it to be a positive thing.

 

[broken_one]

Okay, hold on a second.

How are you presenting your singleness? Because if you say that you're not looking for someone, someone who is looking for someone WOULD turn somewhere else. That's what I was trying to say earlier.

 

[Socktastic]

Doom is such a strong word, think of it as developing happiness and avoiding the "nobody loves me, everybody hates me" trap some singles fall into.

If you actively state that you're not interested in a relationship then you'll deter all but the most insistent individuals from seeing you as someone who would appreciate their efforts to pair up with you.

If by embracing the single life you are simply living, then that's a different matter. If people concentrate on being single too much it can become unnecessarily important in your life, it doesn't matter if it's positive or negative.

 

[Elliewaves]

No, Most people I know that go on and on about how much they enjoy being single (forced or not) usually end up married or in a relationship within a short amount of time. I don't think singleness is so much the crux of joy or pain in life. I've noticed that if a person is miserable single they are usually miserable in a relationship (after the butterflies have worn off), and likewise if they are not tied up in singleness making them solely happy or sad they are generally happy at any stage of life they find themselves at. And that is attractive no matter if you are voicing it loudly or not.

 

[avi8tor]

I think embracing it for the time being is way better than coming across as a clingy "[bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] I need to find someone soon or I'm gonna be single forever" type. The latter attitude comes off as being too desperate and is a turnoff in my opinion.

 

[redblue22]

embrace but keep it to yourself.

 

[Strider1002]

Not at all. Really, I'd say we should embrace every situation that we end up in because God has brought us into it. "Delight in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart."

 

[Megagog]

If I embrace being single and look at it as empowerment and encourage myself and other people to feel whole without having a "other half"
and really just make the most of it because it's what I got...

...I know its a healthy outlook but is it going to doom me to being single forever? (because someone will look at me and be like "oh she likes being single I'll leave her alone")

You're only dooming yourself if you're actually looking for another person.

 

[Strider1002]

What's the alternative? Being miserable as long as you don't have a boyfriend? That is definitely not attractive.