EMOTIONALLY DEPRESSED

[felix ekemini]

i have a female friend, we have been friends for a long time and i thought we can take the friendship to another level by proposing we going into a relationship. She rejected it and said that she feels nothing for that she can't be in a relationship with me. I feel devastated because over the years i developed feels for her and i can't stay without thinking of her.. i am emotionally depressed.. Please advice me on what to do.thank you

 

[Jeshu]

i have a female friend, we have been friends for a long time and i thought we can take the friendship to another level by proposing we going into a relationship. She rejected it and said that she feels nothing for that she can't be in a relationship with me. I feel devastated because over the years i developed feels for her and i can't stay without thinking of her.. i am emotionally depressed.. Please advice me on what to do.thank you

The best thing is to bring all your pain and everything that has gone wrong and is now hurting you to Jesus - time and again - and ask Him to teach you what to do with it so that it produces clean instead of unclean water.

Understand that Jesus can restore your emotional health and lift the depression. Keep an eye on your thought patterns and make sure they are true and honest and sow the good seed that is the Word of God in your heart.

You will be amazed how Jesus can forge weapons of war into instruments that serve Him and humanity, ponder on that each time you go through dark stages, how can these times become useful other than a warning not believe the lies of depression but let Jesus save you from your pain.

Most importantly of all find your identity in God, and not in a woman for such can hurt really bad. You are a child of the most high. Dearly beloved and eagerly sought after.

It is in the truth of God's word that you will find healing and a future.

Isaiah 49:21
Then you will say in your heart, ‘Who bore me these? I was bereaved and barren; I was exiled and rejected. Who brought these up? I was left all alone, but these—where have they come from?’”

 

[felix ekemini]

Thanks jeshu..you have been of great help

 

[Tempura]

i have a female friend, we have been friends for a long time and i thought we can take the friendship to another level by proposing we going into a relationship. She rejected it and said that she feels nothing for that she can't be in a relationship with me. I feel devastated because over the years i developed feels for her and i can't stay without thinking of her.. i am emotionally depressed.. Please advice me on what to do.thank you

I've kind of been there. I was already in a relationship, about two years, and we were talking about getting married. Then, she felt like she had to quit it. She quit it in a stupid and hurtful way - hurtful for her, too. Cheating and such. I was devastated, and for some reason so was she. After years went by, I realized she needed to deal with many things, and she didn't really love me the way she would've wanted, or the way I would've wanted. And there were plenty of things wrong with me too, so I can't blame her. Like most, we were supposed to stay friends, but that never happened. I was too bitter and possessive, and she was busy doing her things. In time, I learned to let go. It was hard for me because I am co-dependent.

The last woman I was with, didn't go into drama or "break my heart" in that sense, but she too thought she wouldn't want to live with me. We had been dating for about 2 years also. No drama involved, but the sadness was real. I really loved her, and I still do. And I know she loves me, but not as a lover, not as a companion. This was probably the first and last time I could manage to be friends with a woman I love in a romantic way. At times it's hard to not "force" my feelings on her, but I manage. It's a good lesson for me, every time. I learn patience, I learn to respect the free will of others, and I learn how to let go. Especially when I don't want to learn any more of them.

The years have also taught me this: no matter how many times I thought "I could never love anyone like I loved her", I was wrong every time. There is a lot of love in us, and there's a lot of love in others too. Sometimes these loves bump into each other. We have a lot to give, and that's where we should concentrate on. In giving, not receiving. At times, we will receive too, but when that becomes our priority, we get sidetracked.

I have no idea if my rambling helped at all. Probably not. But fear not, brother. I'm one of those reactionary nutcases who almost killed himself over a broken heart, and I thought it would never be over. Yet here I am.

Said a prayer for you. Jesus Christ is with you both, no matter where your paths may lead.

 

[RuthD]

I know the pain of rejection. It hurts really bad. It has happened to me several times, too. It took me a long time to get the person out of my head, too. The thing to aim for is acceptance of the situation and then try to let go and do so like Jeshu said through praying and giving your troubles to the Lord. When you feel ready try and find someone new who will want a relationship.

 

[FutureAndAHope]

i have a female friend, we have been friends for a long time and i thought we can take the friendship to another level by proposing we going into a relationship. She rejected it and said that she feels nothing for that she can't be in a relationship with me. I feel devastated because over the years i developed feels for her and i can't stay without thinking of her.. i am emotionally depressed.. Please advice me on what to do.thank you

Yeah it can be tough. The hardest thing will be letting go, it is not easy to break an emotional tie, especially when we wanted it to work. But God always has a back up plan for us.

John 14:18 I will not leave you desolate: I come unto you.

Often we read the above scripture and think that God is just talking about a Spiritual Experience, we equate God with the spiritual level. It is true that God does give comfort through His presence, and for some their troubles are not over till they reach heaven, God being their only comfort.

But in life generally, God also will not leave us desolate. He desires that we obtain true joy, as the bible says a fruit of knowing God is joy. God will find you some one who is a fit for you, you will love them, and they will love you.

Isa 43:1-4 But now, says the Lord your Maker, O Jacob, and your life-giver, O Israel: have no fear, for I have taken up your cause; naming you by your name, I have made you mine. When you go through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they will not go over you: when you go Because of your value in my eyes, you have been honoured, and loved by me; so I will give men for you, and peoples for your life ... [I would say] Give no thought to the things which are past; let the early times go out of your minds. See, I am doing a new thing; now it is starting; will you not take note of it? I will even make a way in the waste land, and rivers in the dry country.