In late February of this year, my father-in-law died of cancer. A couple of weeks after that, my prostate tumor marker (PSA) was found to have risen by quite a bit. Further tests showed that I had a 93% chance of having prostate cancer. This frightened me terribly, so I went for a prostate biopsy.
It took 6 days for the results to come out and I cannot begin to explain to you how I passed those 6 days. Anyway, the biopsy found no cancer cells. You would think that this would fill me with relief and thanksgiving but it wasn't the end of my ordeal. The urologist told me that even though the 12 biopsy samples showed no trace of cancer, because the samples were randomly taken, he could have missed the cancer. He asked me to wait for 6 months before retesting. If the tumor marker continues to rise, it would be a concern.
My hellish 6-day wait had been extended to an even more nightmarish 6-month wait! Now the 6 months are drawing to a close. I am scheduled for follow-up tests on September 21. I have been suffering from fear, anxiety and worries for more than 5 months. I have done everything I can think of - prayer, Bible study, professional counseling, self-help books but nothing seems to work. The only thing I haven't tried is medication.
I feel that God has deserted and abandoned me. I call out to Him but He has been very silent. It troubles me greatly that He does not spare His people from serious diseases. I believe in Him but how do I trust Him?
It took 6 days for the results to come out and I cannot begin to explain to you how I passed those 6 days. Anyway, the biopsy found no cancer cells. You would think that this would fill me with relief and thanksgiving but it wasn't the end of my ordeal. The urologist told me that even though the 12 biopsy samples showed no trace of cancer, because the samples were randomly taken, he could have missed the cancer. He asked me to wait for 6 months before retesting. If the tumor marker continues to rise, it would be a concern.
My hellish 6-day wait had been extended to an even more nightmarish 6-month wait! Now the 6 months are drawing to a close. I am scheduled for follow-up tests on September 21. I have been suffering from fear, anxiety and worries for more than 5 months. I have done everything I can think of - prayer, Bible study, professional counseling, self-help books but nothing seems to work. The only thing I haven't tried is medication.
I feel that God has deserted and abandoned me. I call out to Him but He has been very silent. It troubles me greatly that He does not spare His people from serious diseases. I believe in Him but how do I trust Him?