Wives vs submission to husbands vs submission to Jesus

[S.O.J.I.A.]

so some will bring up ephesians 5:21 in saying that husbands and wives must mutually submit to one another. they'll start the narrative on husbands and wives from verse 21.

the problem with this conclusion is that Jesus does not submit to, or is under subjection to, the church. there is no mutual submission in the Jesus/church relationship. there is instead a complimentary obligation of the Jesus sacrificing all for the church and the church coming under full subjection to Jesus. the Ephesians 5 passage would see that marriage would function in the same dynamic with the husband being the role of Jesus and the wife being in the role of the church.

there's a reason why the end of the passage says that a wife is to 'respect' her husband instead of saying love your husband. you're not going to trust, follow, or submit to someone you don't respect. those who have authority desire to be respected by those under them.

 

[Paidiske]

the problem with this conclusion is that Jesus does not submit to, or is under subjection to, the church.

Indeed, and the analogy of Christ/church and husband/wife does have limitations. These things are not exactly alike; the comparison can only be pushed so far.

In particular, the idea that men need respect and women need love, read out of a passage like this, is particularly dangerous; as it tacitly suggests the women don't need to be, and perhaps ought not to be, respected; and yet a lack of respect for either spouse is corrosive to marriage.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

Indeed, and the analogy of Christ/church and husband/wife does have limitations. These things are not exactly alike; the comparison can only be pushed so far.

only in the sense that we cannot measure up to the perfection of the Christ/church relationship as fallen sinners. the dynamics are the same however, as the passage illustrates.

In particular, the idea that men need respect and women need love, read out of a passage like this, is particularly dangerous; as it tacitly suggests the women don't need to be, and perhaps ought not to be, respected; and yet a lack of respect for either spouse is corrosive to marriage.

would a husband who loves his wife like Christ be disrespecting his wife?

 

[Paidiske]

only in the sense that we cannot measure up to the perfection of the Christ/church relationship. the dynamics are the same however, as the passage illustrates.

There's more to marriage dynamics than the particular issue under discussion in that passage.

would a husband who loves his wife like Christ be disrespecting his wife?

I have certainly come across men who thought they were loving their wives like Christ loves the church, but were in fact disrespecting her enormously.

Part of the problem is that in a hierarchical view of marriage, the wife is looked down upon; given less agency for herself and in the family, and this is often justified by appeals to her inferior nature. And that is, in and of itself, inherently disrespectful.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

There's more to marriage dynamics than the particular issue under discussion in that passage.

yes, but this passage deals with the roles of the husband and wife in marriage. the husband lovingly leads and the wife respectfully submits.

I have certainly come across men who thought they were loving their wives like Christ loves the church, but were in fact disrespecting her enormously.

Part of the problem is that in a hierarchical view of marriage, the wife is looked down upon; given less agency for herself and in the family, and this is often justified by appeals to her inferior nature. And that is, in and of itself, inherently disrespectful.

such treatment would be in contradiction to the admonition of ephesians 5:22-30. It would, unfortunately, however, be in line with the curse on marriage(genesis 3:16). those who sow in error will reap it's fruit.

 

[LostMarbels]

I dont know if this is gonna help u or not, but here it is.
A woman (that loves and TRULY lives for Christ) will not submit to her husband, if her husband does not take on the roll of leading her and loving her, just as Christ loved the church. A woman needs to feel secure and protected, at all times. When she has sex (makes love) she needs to have her emotions met, or else she cannot bring herself to have sex with her spouse. Because she feels empty. Her love is on the inside, a mans love is on the outside. If she feels like a treasured jewel to you and you listen to her and care for her emotions as well as her physical being, you got it made with her. She will b ready at all times. Men are visual and dont communicate as often as women need. Talking and emotions being met, is foreplay to a woman. Not like the man of course, you are visual, she is not. Her visual does not come into effect until the emotional part is satisfied. She has to feel trust, security and emotional comfort from the spouse.

The only aspect of this argument that gets to me, is by not realising that the bible addresses these concerns.

"Love your wife as Christ loved the Church."(Ephesians 5:25) This means that you should be willing to risk your life to help or save your wife. Christ's love for the church is without limits; nothing is held back. He gave His life for the church - before we loved Him. "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." There it is in a nutshell. Your love for your wife is more important than your own life, wants, or aspirations. God's love does not depend on your love for Him; His love is unconditional. Under God's leadership and help- love your wife as a service--as giving your life to God. Loving your wife is to be your primary ministry as a husband.

"Love your wife in the same way that you love your body and your life."(Ephesians 5:28-33) You care for your body daily. You try to be as well fed and healthy as is possible. You quickly take care of any needs or desires that you may have. Any sexual desire as a husband should be cared for with your wife. In the same way, care for your wife's needs and well being. Feel your wife's pain and illnesses and rejoice in her health and happiness as if it were your own life. A husband must see his wife's sexual desires and make supreme efforts to meet those needs too. Basically, her needs or desires, whether they are financial, physical, emotional or spiritual, must receive your full attention. In this way, you can love her and provide for her, just as much as you do for yourself.


"Be considerate as you live with your wife, with respect ..."(I Peter 3:7) The Bible says that if we neglect this command, our prayers will be hindered! To be considerate means to quit any irritating habits! When she needs to be helped with carrying heavy items, do it! If she needs time to herself, take care of the children for her for a bit! Help your wife in any way you can. Show your love to her and always be considerate of her needs and wants. Pray and ask God to show you where you may be inconsiderate.

"Do not be harsh with your wife."(Colossians 3:19) Women are a lot more sensitive than men, so realize that harsh words, angry looks, irritated tones of voice and impatience will deeply affect your wife. Rejoice that she is a lady and isn't like you. Remember that she is a precious gift that God has given you and always be thankful for her.

"The husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife."(I Corinthians 7:3-5) Please your wife physically. Don't deprive her of what she needs. Sexual pleasure is something that is given, not forced or taken. Discuss with her what her needs are both inside and outside of the bedroom.

"Rejoice in your wife all your life. Let her body satisfy you. Be captivated with her."(Proverbs 5:18-19) No man should look at other women, or pictures of other women, when he has a wife on whom he can gaze daily. A husband should become fully satisfied with his wife's body. No matter what the size or shape, if a man will try, and ask God to help him, he can grow to truly find his wife's body to be the most attractive in the world. This is the true spirit of being captivated with your wife. If you show that you are attracted to her, she will feel sexy and lady-like.

"Women may be dressed in simple clothing, with a quiet and serious air; not with vanity about her hair and gold or jewels or expensive clothing;"(1 Timothy 2:9) Encourage your wife to be modest in public and erotic in private with you. A modest woman is a lady. There is so much sin and temptation that results from women showing too much skin in public. Just think of the pleasure of knowing that no one sees too much of your wife's legs but you! You will be shocked at how this one maneuver will increase your feelings of masculinity and her feelings of femininity.

"Do not be captivated by other women."(Proverbs 5:20) Finding other women attractive and looking at them will degrade your view of your own wife, because you will start to compare her with them. You will be less satisfied with her, and she will feel less special to you. No man can build a habit of glances without subconsciously doing it in his wife's company, and she will definitely notice and be hurt. Remember to be captivated with your wife and no one else. She will feel like the Queen of the world as you fall more and more in love with her.

"Call your wife 'blessed' and praise her."(Proverbs 31:28-29) Tell her that she is special and that she is greater than any other woman on earth. Don't just mention her physical beauty, but compliment her on her care for you, her hard work, and her lady-like attributes. Watch the flower of your wife's heart blossom as you repeatedly fill her ears with your praises. She longs for those words and she wants to hear them from you! You may not want to cause her to be too prideful, but your wife needs and longs to be treasured by you.

"Tell your wife how captivated you are with her body."(Song of Solomon 4:7; 7:1-8) A true lover will make sure that his wife knows that he finds no flaw in her. God made your wife, and God makes no mistakes. If you find a part of her body flawed, then it is your mind that needs to be changed. The responsibility upon the man to grow to love, and express love, for every part of his wife is needed. Also, respectfully and sensually tell her so. It will not help to criticize her or to be sarcastic. If you do this, it will probably result in her wanting to be less romantic with you less often. Think of how good she will feel when both you and her truly believe that you are enamored with every part of her!

"Honor your marriage; keep it pure by remaining true to your wife in every way."(Hebrews 13:4) Jesus says that "lustful looks are adultery."(Matthew 5:28) This is similar to "where your treasure is, there will your heart be also..."(Luke 12:34). Do not treasure such lust in any area of life. Deny it access to you heart. Keep your marriage pure by training your heart and eyes to be true to your wife. Your marriage will reap huge benefits if you do and will hopefully last for a lifetime!

"Be thankful for your wife and realize the favor you have received from God."(Proverbs 18:22) Just think of how lonely you would be without a wife. Adam was alone and it wasn't good for him to be alone, so God gave him a wife. You have a lifetime companion, a friend, and a lover to enjoy every day. What a blessing! Thank God and pray for her daily. She is a tremendous "prize" from God.

"Be one flesh with your wife in every way."(Matthew 19:5) Enjoy life with her as if you want to be inseparable from her. Long to be with her, like you did when you first met. Rush home from work to see her. Think about her during the day. Call her every day and text her as much as you can. Learn as a couple to agree on everything and be like-minded. Enjoy intimacy and sex often. You should have sex as often as is necessary to meet the desires of whichever spouse has the stronger sex drive, and as schedules and health permit. Spend time just talking and sharing the day's events. Show a genuine interest and listen intently to your wife. Give her your full attention and eye contact anytime she is talking to you. Your wife is more important than anything or anyone alive but Jesus Christ. Be unified and one with your wife.

 

[minique]

so some will bring up ephesians 5:21 in saying that husbands and wives must mutually submit to one another. they'll start the narrative on husbands and wives from verse 21.

the problem with this conclusion is that Jesus does not submit to, or is under subjection to, the church. there is no mutual submission in the Jesus/church relationship. there is instead a complimentary obligation of the Jesus sacrificing all for the church and the church coming under full subjection to Jesus. the Ephesians 5 passage would see that marriage would function in the same dynamic with the husband being the role of Jesus and the wife being in the role of the church.

there's a reason why the end of the passage says that a wife is to 'respect' her husband instead of saying love your husband. you're not going to trust, follow, or submit to someone you don't respect. those who have authority desire to be respected by those under them.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens (Ec 3:1). With that being said, there are times and seasons in a marriage when a husband should listen to (defined as obey) wisdom from his wife. The Bible illustrates that some degree of mutual obedience in a marriage can be beneficial. Those examples are even more comprehensive than one verse in Eph 5:21.

- If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. James 1:5

- The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Proverbs 4:7

The Bible teaches that wisdom is a virtue that BOTH men and women should acquire. In other words, wisdom isn't just for wives seeking to be like the Pr 31 woman.

- A wise man will listen and increase in learning, And a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel. Proverbs 1:5

- A wise man is he who listens to counsel. Proverbs 12:15

- Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Proverbs 19:20

According to the lexicon, one of the definitions or synonyms for listen (shama 8085) is "to obey, be obedient." In other words, listening (8085) is something everyone should do - husbands included. Therefore, husbands should listen to (8085 obey) the wisdom from their wives when necessary, and there are examples of that in the Bible.

A virtuous wife "speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue." Proverbs 31:26

Abraham listened to wisdom from his wife:
But God said to him, "Do not be so distressed about the boy and your slave woman. LISTEN (8085) to whatever Sarah tells you, because it is through Isaac that your offspring will be reckoned" (Genesis 21:12). God could have delivered the message and instruction directly to Abraham, but he didn't. God told Abraham to obey his wife instead.

Hannah's husband submitted to the vow that she made to the Lord
(1 Samuel 1:11, 21-23). This is especially relevant since an OT husband could lawfully cancel a vow made by his wife. Hannah's husband didn't do that; he didn't pull rank. Instead, he listened to the wisdom of his wife.

Xerxes listened to Esther's plea about reversing Haman's order to destroy the Jews (Esther 8:5, 9:13). This is significant because after the king had signed and sealed a decree or given his permission for a decree to be signed and sealed , it was not to be repealed or revoked (Esther 1:19, Esther 3:9-12). However, Xerxes listened to the wisdom of his wife and revoked the decree to kill the Jews.

Nabal was foolish. Proverbs really sheds light on that by listing the traits of a foolish person for us:

... fools despise wisdom and instruction (Proverbs 1:7b).

Do not speak to fools, for they will scorn your prudent words (Proverbs 23:9).

Therefore, we can conclude that Nabal "despised wisdom and instruction" because he was foolish, and that's probably why Abigail didn't discuss her plan of action with Nabal beforehand. As a wise woman, Abigail understood that Nabal would "scorn her prudent words." Unlike Nabal, David acknowledged and affirmed Abagail's capacity to " speak with wisdom, and faithful instruction." (Proverbs 31:26, 1 Samuel 25:24-34) David listened to Abigail and decided not kill Nabal and the men in his house. What's the point? Nabal illustrates what can happen when a husband is unapproachable and unwilling to listen to the wisdom of his wife when necessary.

 

[Paidiske]

yes, but this passage deals with the roles of the husband and wife in marriage. the husband lovingly leads and the wife respectfully submits.

That's one reading. Another is that both husband and wife share leadership (taking initiative, making decisions) and that both lovingly and respectfully submit to one another.

In my experience the second is much healthier for all concerned. I think it's a distortion of this passage to see all power as something God gives to the husband. That's not a husband's role.

 

[Solomons Porch]

The only aspect of this argument that gets to me, is by not realising that the bible addresses these concerns.

"Love your wife as Christ loved the Church."(Ephesians 5:25) This means that you should be willing to risk your life to help or save your wife. Christ's love for the church is without limits; nothing is held back. He gave His life for the church - before we loved Him. "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." There it is in a nutshell. Your love for your wife is more important than your own life, wants, or aspirations. God's love does not depend on your love for Him; His love is unconditional. Under God's leadership and help- love your wife as a service--as giving your life to God. Loving your wife is to be your primary ministry as a husband.

"Love your wife in the same way that you love your body and your life."(Ephesians 5:28-33) You care for your body daily. You try to be as well fed and healthy as is possible. You quickly take care of any needs or desires that you may have. Any sexual desire as a husband should be cared for with your wife. In the same way, care for your wife's needs and well being. Feel your wife's pain and illnesses and rejoice in her health and happiness as if it were your own life. A husband must see his wife's sexual desires and make supreme efforts to meet those needs too. Basically, her needs or desires, whether they are financial, physical, emotional or spiritual, must receive your full attention. In this way, you can love her and provide for her, just as much as you do for yourself.


"Be considerate as you live with your wife, with respect ..."(I Peter 3:7) The Bible says that if we neglect this command, our prayers will be hindered! To be considerate means to quit any irritating habits! When she needs to be helped with carrying heavy items, do it! If she needs time to herself, take care of the children for her for a bit! Help your wife in any way you can. Show your love to her and always be considerate of her needs and wants. Pray and ask God to show you where you may be inconsiderate.

"Do not be harsh with your wife."(Colossians 3:19) Women are a lot more sensitive than men, so realize that harsh words, angry looks, irritated tones of voice and impatience will deeply affect your wife. Rejoice that she is a lady and isn't like you. Remember that she is a precious gift that God has given you and always be thankful for her.

"The husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife."(I Corinthians 7:3-5) Please your wife physically. Don't deprive her of what she needs. Sexual pleasure is something that is given, not forced or taken. Discuss with her what her needs are both inside and outside of the bedroom.

"Rejoice in your wife all your life. Let her body satisfy you. Be captivated with her."(Proverbs 5:18-19) No man should look at other women, or pictures of other women, when he has a wife on whom he can gaze daily. A husband should become fully satisfied with his wife's body. No matter what the size or shape, if a man will try, and ask God to help him, he can grow to truly find his wife's body to be the most attractive in the world. This is the true spirit of being captivated with your wife. If you show that you are attracted to her, she will feel sexy and lady-like.

"Women may be dressed in simple clothing, with a quiet and serious air; not with vanity about her hair and gold or jewels or expensive clothing;"(1 Timothy 2:9) Encourage your wife to be modest in public and erotic in private with you. A modest woman is a lady. There is so much sin and temptation that results from women showing too much skin in public. Just think of the pleasure of knowing that no one sees too much of your wife's legs but you! You will be shocked at how this one maneuver will increase your feelings of masculinity and her feelings of femininity.

"Do not be captivated by other women."(Proverbs 5:20) Finding other women attractive and looking at them will degrade your view of your own wife, because you will start to compare her with them. You will be less satisfied with her, and she will feel less special to you. No man can build a habit of glances without subconsciously doing it in his wife's company, and she will definitely notice and be hurt. Remember to be captivated with your wife and no one else. She will feel like the Queen of the world as you fall more and more in love with her.

"Call your wife 'blessed' and praise her."(Proverbs 31:28-29) Tell her that she is special and that she is greater than any other woman on earth. Don't just mention her physical beauty, but compliment her on her care for you, her hard work, and her lady-like attributes. Watch the flower of your wife's heart blossom as you repeatedly fill her ears with your praises. She longs for those words and she wants to hear them from you! You may not want to cause her to be too prideful, but your wife needs and longs to be treasured by you.

"Tell your wife how captivated you are with her body."(Song of Solomon 4:7; 7:1-8) A true lover will make sure that his wife knows that he finds no flaw in her. God made your wife, and God makes no mistakes. If you find a part of her body flawed, then it is your mind that needs to be changed. The responsibility upon the man to grow to love, and express love, for every part of his wife is needed. Also, respectfully and sensually tell her so. It will not help to criticize her or to be sarcastic. If you do this, it will probably result in her wanting to be less romantic with you less often. Think of how good she will feel when both you and her truly believe that you are enamored with every part of her!

"Honor your marriage; keep it pure by remaining true to your wife in every way."(Hebrews 13:4) Jesus says that "lustful looks are adultery."(Matthew 5:28) This is similar to "where your treasure is, there will your heart be also..."(Luke 12:34). Do not treasure such lust in any area of life. Deny it access to you heart. Keep your marriage pure by training your heart and eyes to be true to your wife. Your marriage will reap huge benefits if you do and will hopefully last for a lifetime!

"Be thankful for your wife and realize the favor you have received from God."(Proverbs 18:22) Just think of how lonely you would be without a wife. Adam was alone and it wasn't good for him to be alone, so God gave him a wife. You have a lifetime companion, a friend, and a lover to enjoy every day. What a blessing! Thank God and pray for her daily. She is a tremendous "prize" from God.

"Be one flesh with your wife in every way."(Matthew 19:5) Enjoy life with her as if you want to be inseparable from her. Long to be with her, like you did when you first met. Rush home from work to see her. Think about her during the day. Call her every day and text her as much as you can. Learn as a couple to agree on everything and be like-minded. Enjoy intimacy and sex often. You should have sex as often as is necessary to meet the desires of whichever spouse has the stronger sex drive, and as schedules and health permit. Spend time just talking and sharing the day's events. Show a genuine interest and listen intently to your wife. Give her your full attention and eye contact anytime she is talking to you. Your wife is more important than anything or anyone alive but Jesus Christ. Be unified and one with your wife.

WOW !!!!!!
One question..... did you type all this and come up with this yourself???
Dont you fib now you on a Christian Forum, naw Im just kidding with ya, But for real my goodness, you did an awesome job, nailed it. Thank you for the effort you put into this.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

That's one reading. Another is that both husband and wife share leadership (taking initiative, making decisions) and that both lovingly and respectfully submit to one another.

that would certainly be your own tradition, philosophy, feeling, but it wouldn't be ephesians 5:22-29...or 1 peter 3:1-2, 5-6....or colossians 3:18.

this goes back to what are ultimate authority is going to be. the Word of God or our own way of thinking.

In my experience the second is much healthier for all concerned. I think it's a distortion of this passage to see all power as something God gives to the husband. That's not a husband's role.

then I suppose God didn't know what he was talking about when He inspired His writers to say these things in His name.

I stand by the belief that if we obey what God says to us we will be blessed. others may disagree.

 

[Tetra]

That's one reading. Another is that both husband and wife share leadership (taking initiative, making decisions) and that both lovingly and respectfully submit to one another.

In my experience the second is much healthier for all concerned. I think it's a distortion of this passage to see all power as something God gives to the husband. That's not a husband's role.

Isn't it always convievent that men read it only one way...

 

[minique]

only in the sense that we cannot measure up to the perfection of the Christ/church relationship as fallen sinners. the dynamics are the same however, as the passage illustrates.

The dynamics are not the same.
The analogy between Christ's relationship with the church and the husband and wife relationship is a limited one. There are some things that take place in Christ's relationship with his church that do not take place in the husband and wife relationship, and vice versa.

A Christian wife might need to go to her husband and respectfully point out his sin if or when he sins against her. If her husband doesn't listen to her, she may have to employ the help of others depending on the sin (Mt 18:5, Luke 17:3). However, the church never has to go to Christ and point out his sin because Christ is sinless - perfect, but the same is not true of husbands (or wives).

Christ doesn't have sexual relations with his church. However, I haven't heard about any husbands letting that deter them from being sexually intimate with their wives. However, some groups frequently use Christ's lack of submission to the church as an example of why husbands shouldn't submit to their wives. Christ is sinless, perfect, omnipotent, he knows the beginning from the end. Christ has absolutely nothing to gain from submitting to his church. The same is not true of earthly, fallen husbands who don't know everything like Christ does.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

WOW !!!!!!
One question..... did you type all this and come up with this yourself???
Dont you fib now you on a Christian Forum, naw Im just kidding with ya, But for real my goodness, you did an awesome job, nailed it. Thank you for the effort you put into this.

I posted this in another thread related to this subject but it bears repeating.

The Bible is not anti-women - Adam4d.com

people tend to think that women have all the burden...they don't.

 

[LostMarbels]

WOW !!!!!!
One question..... did you type all this and come up with this yourself???
Dont you fib now you on a Christian Forum, naw Im just kidding with ya, But for real my goodness, you did an awesome job, nailed it. Thank you for the effort you put into this.

Unfortunately, no, this time I did not write it all myself. I mostly copied an article I have used for refernce in past studies on this topic. I forgot to cite that refernce: How to Love Your Wife According to the Bible

I am actualy a little embarrassed for not taking the time to break it down myself this time. Be it as it may, my intentions are to point out that God is a romantic lover. Willing to lay his own life down for his bride. We should be the same.

I am honestly sorry if I misled you. Not my style to do that.

 

[S.O.J.I.A.]

The analogy between Christ's relationship with the church and the husband and wife relationship is a limited one. There are some things that take place in Christ's relationship with his church that do not take place in the husband and wife relationship, and vice versa.

none of them having to do with submission of the wife and sacrificial love of the husband

A Christian wife might need to go to her husband and respectfully point out his sin if or when he sins against her. If her husband doesn't listen to her, she may have to employ the help of others depending on the sin (Mt 18:5, Luke 17:3). However, the church never has to go to Christ and point out his sin because Christ is sinless - perfect, but the same is not true of husbands (or wives).

nothing to do with the role of submission for the wife and love for the husband. appealing to an authority is not an annulment of that authority.

Christ doesn't have sexual relations with his church. However, I haven't heard about any husbands letting that deter them from being sexually intimate with their wives.

1 Corinthians 7:2-5. if you want mutual submission, here it is.

However, some groups frequently use Christ's lack of submission to the church as an example of why husbands shouldn't submit to their wives. Christ is sinless, perfect, omnipotent, he knows the beginning from the end. Christ has absolutely nothing to gain from submitting to his church. The same is not true of earthly, fallen husbands who don't know everything like Christ does.

dealt with this argument already. neither the husband or the wife get to wait until their spouse gets it all right before they fulfill the marital duties to each other. the husband is to love the wife regardless of her submissiveness and the wife is to submit to the husband regardless of his misgivings as a leader.

 

[Solomons Porch]

I posted this in another thread related to this subject but it bears repeating.

The Bible is not anti-women - Adam4d.com

people tend to think that women have all the burden...they don't.

I dont think women have all the burden, I think they have a different kind of burden and a different way of carrying it. Men the same. Until we can reach a place of appreciating and complementing each others differences it will be a battle. I say lets just throw down the swords and be happy, ya know? But anywho, we live, we learn but we must desire to be like Him. If we all followed His word, this wouldnt be an issue.

 

[Solomons Porch]

Unfortunately, no, this time I did not write it all myself. I mostly copied an article I have used for refernce in past studies on this topic. I forgot to cite that refernce: How to Love Your Wife According to the Bible

I am actualy a little embarrassed for not taking the time to break it down myself this time. Be it as it may, my intentions are to point out that God is a romantic lover. Willing to lay his own life down for his bride. We should be the same.

I am honestly sorry if I misled you. Not my style to do that.

Oh honey dont need to apologize to me at all, you did not mislead me. If anything I think what you shared was great and would hopefully help alot of people that come across it, truly I think its an awesome read.

But yeah on the funny side of the coin, I was like oh my Lordy this man been typing since the thread was posted lol...... its funny, just laugh with me, alrighty?

 

[Big Drew]

If mamma ain't happy then no one is happy. I am the man in this house and I say we do whatever the wife wants done.

I wear the pants in this family...but she tells me what color they're gonna be.

 

[minique]

the Ephesians 5 passage would see that marriage would function in the same dynamic with the husband being the role of Jesus and the wife being in the role of the church.

There's a tendency in the church to treat Eph 5 and a few other so-called marriages passages as if they exist in a vacuum, but they don't. They are part of the whole counsel of God. With that being said, the Bible teaches that men also represent the church. After all, the church (bride of Christ) is made up of men and women - not just women. Male believers are also part of the bride of Christ (church). That symbolism isn't restricted to women and wives. It also applies to male believers too. That's another fact that so often gets left out of the conversation. Christian men don't stop representing the church when and if they become husbands.

Woman represents God too. God has many names and many attributes. God Himself is called our Helper (Ezer in Hebrew):

Behold, God is my helper (Psalms 54:4a).

In the New Testament, the Holy Spirit is also called our Helper: John 14:17, 26.
Considering God’s role as Helper puts things in perspective. God, Almighty Sovereign Lord of the Universe, is our Helper, and women are created in his image to be helpers in their marriages, families and communities. What's the point? Women also represent God; that's not limited or restricted to men. That fact very often gets left out of the conversation too.

 

[Paidiske]

that would certainly be your own tradition, philosophy, feeling, but it wouldn't be ephesians 5:22-29...or 1 peter 3:1-2, 5-6....or colossians 3:18.

this goes back to what are ultimate authority is going to be. the Word of God or our own way of thinking.



then I suppose God didn't know what he was talking about when He inspired His writers to say these things in His name.

I stand by the belief that if we obey what God says to us we will be blessed. others may disagree.

It is a gross slander to suggest that someone whose understanding of the Bible differs from yours is going by their own feelings or way of thinking rather than sincerely seeking to understand.

If I said, "I don't care what the Scriptures say, this is what seems right to me," you'd have a point. But since we differ on how to apply the Scriptures in the context of our own lives today, we simply differ.