What's on your mind?

[DragonFox91]

They know each other quite well. He house-sits for her and his mom and her are friends. Apparently she's already talked to his mom about this matchmaking scheme to test the waters, so to speak, and the mom thought he wouldn't mind being asked.

Oh, he'll probably say yes then. I think everyone wishes someone could hook them up.

 

[bèlla]

Also wowzers, 1.5 years??? That seems really quick too. Actually it might be the same as bella's. Bella, did you include the engagement period in your 2 years?

She should have a ring by then. My time frame is more in line with hers.

I always figured 1-3 years from first meeting to first date, years 3-4 casually dating each other, 5-7 more serious, 8-9 preparing for marriage, 10 married. That's how I always calculate it in my head.

Traditional women are in demand. There’s not enough of us to go around. Most Christian men are looking for that.

 

[bèlla]

I wish men could wear makeup

Some do. Especially now.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

I wish men could wear makeup

Eh. It's not all it's cracked up to be. Why do you wish this? And... well you could wear makeup if you really wanted, but people would probably think you were gay. I knew a guy who wore makeup for years and everyone said behind his back he was gay, though it was never confirmed or denied. There are band members and actors out there who do wear makeup that I can think of who are very, very heterosexual, though. So it's possible to get away with it, but you'd probably have to be famous. lol

 

[DragonFox91]

Some do. Especially now.

I mean straight men

She should have a ring by then. My time frame is more in line with hers.

I see that. Wow. I'm surprised. I thought people generally wanted to delay marriage?

5 years doesn't seem like delaying it, but doesn't feel like rushing it either.

Traditional women are in demand. There’s not enough of us to go around. Most Christian men are looking for that.

I know Why do you think it's so hard???

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

I'm jealous! I want to go on a date!!!!

She was saying 2 years from first date, basically. I was saying 5-10 years from first meeting to marriage.

Also wowzers, 1.5 years??? That seems really quick too. Actually it might be the same as bella's. Bella, did you include the engagement period in your 2 years?

I always figured 1-3 years from first meeting to first date, years 3-4 casually dating each other, 5-7 more serious, 8-9 preparing for marriage, 10 married. That's how I always calculate it in my head. To me something like that makes sense. That does seem excessively slow, & I hope it wouldn't be that slow, but that seems realistic to me. Maybe 5 years. I would & I want to get married so much, but I think it's best to just play it safe w/ 5. 2 seems really really fast to me.

Funny. I thought it was usually the men who were rushing to get married, but it seems like you take the opposite view. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I just feel like you might have a hard time finding a girl who will agree to such a long time frame. Mind you, I know people who were married 6 months after first meeting. That really is rushing it.

 

[DragonFox91]

Eh. It's not all it's cracked up to be. Why do you wish this? And... well you could wear makeup if you really wanted, but people would probably think you were gay. I knew a guy who wore makeup for years and everyone said behind his back he was gay, though it was never confirmed or denied. There are band members and actors out there who do wear makeup that I can think of who are very, very heterosexual, though. So it's possible to get away with it, but you'd probably have to be famous. lol

I just wish they could totally change their facial appearance like women can w/ makeup. It's just amazing how much you can transform yourself w/ it & us men are stuck w/ our plain faces.

At minimum I'd like to wear it on my bags under my eyes. I hate people saying 'you look tired' when I'm wide awake. That'd be the last thing you want someone to say during a date!

BTW, it's true a lot of men like minimum or no make-up on women. Seems like so many women wear a lot of makeup, it says you're unique when you don't wear it. (I've heard women say that men think 'minimum or no make-up' usually involves a lot of make-up, but the point is, the less you have to wear, the better)

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

I see that. Wow. I'm surprised. I thought people generally wanted to delay marriage?

Christians who practice what they preach generally don't want to delay it longer than necessary for reasons I probably don't have to spell out to you. I think the temptation to sin would get worse and worse the longer you delayed the marriage.

 

[DragonFox91]

Funny. I thought it was usually the men who were rushing to get married, but it seems like you take the opposite view. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I just feel like you might have a hard time finding a girl who will agree to such a long time frame. Mind you, I know people who were married 6 months after first meeting. That really is rushing it.

I want to rush, but I don't think it's the smart thing to do. 5 doesn't seem slow or rushing to me.

I'm aware of one couple that got married 6-months or so after first meeting. It was completely out-of-left field. She must've really liked him.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

At minimum I'd like to wear it on my bags under my eyes. I hate people saying 'you look tired' when I'm wide awake. That'd be the last thing you want someone to say during a date!

LOL I dunno why, but this made me burst out laughing!

 

[bèlla]

I mean straight men

I would have a regimen for my guy. Quality skin care so he looks his best and ages well. Manicure and pedicure. You don’t need to add color but the nails should trimmed and the skin is soft and supple. Routine massages and body care to soothe sore muscles after workouts and for pampering.

I prefer a clean face. Most men shave. Some have hair removal. I dare not ask! But I really like it!!! *winks @SarahsKnight* I think brows look better when they’re maintained. They enhance the face. I would not expect him to wear makeup or ask. For TV that’s fine because they add it. Otherwise, no.

I see that. Wow. I'm surprised. I thought people generally wanted to delay marriage?

5 years doesn't seem like delaying it, but doesn't feel like rushing it either.

You’re interested in a woman who’s in demand in secular and Christian circles. Nailing her down for 5-7 years may be a stretch.

I know Why do you think it's so hard???

Feminism.

 

[DragonFox91]

Christians who practice what they preach generally don't want to delay it longer than necessary for reasons I probably don't have to spell out to you. I think the temptation to sin would get worse and worse the longer you delayed the marriage.

There was a thread I saw on here someone was asking they were only dating a few months & were struggling w/ that. The Replies were they should get married.

It's a hard fight. Either option seems poor.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

There was a thread I saw on here someone was asking they were only dating a few months & were struggling w/ that. The Replies were they should get married.

It's a hard fight. Either option seems poor.

Oh dear. That wasn't very good advice, IMO. Sounds more like a relationship built on lust than anything worth a marriage.

 

[bèlla]

@DragonFox91 Here ya go! That will help.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

I want to rush, but I don't think it's the smart thing to do. 5 doesn't seem slow or rushing to me.

I'm aware of one couple that got married 6-months or so after first meeting. It was completely out-of-left field. She must've really liked him.

Maybe when you finally do get into a relationship, you will feel differently. I think 5 years makes sense to you right now, but it might not when you're a year or so into it.

 

[DragonFox91]

.

 

[DragonFox91]

I would have a regimen for my guy. Quality skin care so he looks his best and ages well. Manicure and pedicure. You don’t need to add color but the nails should trimmed and the skin is soft and supple. Routine massages and body care to soothe sore muscles after workouts and for pampering.

I prefer a clean face. Most men shave. Some have hair removal. I dare not ask! But I really like it!!!*winks @SarahsKnight* I think brows look better when they’re maintained. They enhance the face. I would not expect him to wear makeup or ask. For TV that’s fine because they add it. Otherwise, no.

What do you mean by 'I would have a regimen for my guy.'

You’re interested in a woman who’s in demand in secular and Christian circles. Nailing her down for 5-7 years may be a stretch.

So I have to do it in 2 years b/c she could leave me for another man b/c she wants to get married faster than that?

Is this something partners communicate, how quick they'd want to get married? I have no idea. Oh gosh, I wonder how many partners I'd lose potentially if I told them I think 5 years. :0
Thankfully I've never got that far w/ a woman!

Why do you & Isaiah think 2 years is a good amount?

Feminism.

When I said 'why do you think it's so hard', I meant 'I know so many Christians want traditional women!!! That's what makes it a struggle!!!!!'

 

[DragonFox91]

Maybe when you finally do get into a relationship, you will feel differently. I think 5 years makes sense to you right now, but it might not when you're a year or so into it.

Then I bet it would turn to 6 months

 

[bèlla]

So I have to do it in 2 years b/c she could leave me for another man b/c she wants to get married faster than that?

Look at the numbers. You’re nearly 30. If you meet someone your age and wait 5 years she’s 35 when you marry. You have to consider fertility.

Is this something partners communicate, how quick they'd want to get married? I have no idea. Oh gosh, I wonder how many partners I'd lose potentially if I told them I think 5 years. :0
Thankfully I've never got that far w/ a woman!

Yes, but avoid numbers. Talk about pacing and realistic time frames for marriage. Most weddings take a year to plan. In 2 years you should know if she’s the one. 1 year engagement with planning puts you at 3.

Why do you & Isaiah think 2 years is a good amount?

She mentioned the practical side. But there’s an emotional and spiritual one too. If God is in the union seal the deal. Don’t drag it out. You reach a point in the relationship where emotional need requires deeper relating. You need a wife not a girlfriend.

 

[bèlla]

What do you mean by 'I would have a regimen for my guy.'

I spelled it out. Skin and body care. Fashion and beauty are my specialties. Food and decor are secondaries. It’s my job to keep him well coiffed, well fed, and well cared for.

When I said 'why do you think it's so hard', I meant 'I know so many Christians want traditional women!!! That's what makes it a struggle!!!!!'

They have traditional values and want a partner who shares them.