What's on your mind?

[DragonFox91]

You’re trying to establish rules and protocols before you’ve entered the fray. You need to see how you are in a relationship and understand your comfort zone. Then you’ll know the cadence that suits.

I get so confused, do you mean you as in me personally or you as in you generally. LOL.

You do that a lot - you personally.

 

[bèlla]

I get so confused, do you mean you as in me personally or you as in you generally. LOL.

Sorry!

Throw out the rule book. You want a traditional wife who values home and family. You want someone who pursues their passions or interests. You want someone who loves the Lord and trusts His guidance.

That’s your benchmark. As long as you keep that in mind you’ll be okay. Don’t get sidetracked with time frames. Each connection is different. The right woman could upend your plan. And you know she’s it.

 

[bèlla]

Love this!

Hello! I’m Thomas. For those of you who do not know me, I am a professional Instagram husband.

Posted by the spouse of a famous food blogger.

 

[Rigatoni]

Currently upset @ @bèlla for snagging my coffee.

 

[bèlla]

Currently upset @ @bèlla for snagging my coffee.

So much heat Rigalicious. You’re going to pop!

*pets and replaces it* That should cool you off.

 

[DragonFox91]

I feel exhausted, too tired to read or exercise. There's nothing to watch. I'm bored. It's really quiet on here. I wish the Bible group I go to did more social activities. Plus my stomach is upset.

I could apply for a new job, but I hate doing that & I hate interviewing.

 

[Rigatoni]

So much heat Rigalicious. You’re going to pop!

*pets and replaces it* That should cool you off.

View attachment 295602

 

[bèlla]

You don’t want to cool off? *stifles a grin*

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Be your normal fun loving self.

Play catch up and see what he's been doing. Stay relaxed and allow the conversation to develop organically.

As for the method, everyone has a different approach. When I match I'll mention the person, their qualities, and why I think they're a good fit.

I meant more like how does the "matchmaker" approach the other person about it? It seems like it would all be super awkward. Oh well. I guess we'll see what happens. Sadly, even if he agrees to try it, we won't actually be able to meet in person till the border opens, because he's in the States. Which makes it all the more awkward. One of my friends recently started talking to a guy in the States as well, ironically. She was also set up by a friend who is related to him by marriage.

So he & she don't talk very often?

They know each other quite well. He house-sits for her and his mom and her are friends. Apparently she's already talked to his mom about this matchmaking scheme to test the waters, so to speak, and the mom thought he wouldn't mind being asked.

 

[bèlla]

I meant more like how does the "matchmaker" approach the other person about it?

I shared my approach. I used to mentor. It wasn’t awkward when I mentioned someone. I knew what both we’re looking for. It wasn’t a gamble.

I give the facts but I don’t oversell. I want a hint of mystery that intrigues him. Give him something to look forward to and a few surprises.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

That's true. I've just never had that happen.

You really don't think 2 years is rushing it? I WANT to get married but think 2 years would be rushing it. I joke w/ my friend 'I want to be engaged within a year!!!' but I'm not serious about it.

Is this 2 years knowing each other before dating, 2 years dating, or 2 years engagement? Because all of those sound waaaaaay too long. 1.5 years dating with a 6 month engagement sounds like about the limit to me.

Now I'm not at all surprised that you are feeling so hopeless about getting married. If you think it has to take 5-10 years from meeting someone to actually tying the knot. That's a really long time.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

I shared my approach. I used to mentor. It wasn’t awkward when I mentioned someone. I knew what both we’re looking for. It wasn’t a gamble.

I give the facts but I don’t oversell. I want a hint of mystery that intrigues him. Give him something to look forward to and a few surprises.

Thanks for sharing. I think you probably have a lot more finesse than my relative does, though. lol She's probably gonna bungle it hopelessly.

 

[bèlla]

Thanks for sharing. I think you probably have a lot more finesse than my relative does, though. lol She's probably gonna bungle it hopelessly.

No, I bet she did well and piqued his interest. He’s willing to meet. She did something right.

Now you can dwell on your outfit! *lol*

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

No, I bet she did well and piqued his interest. He’s willing to meet. She did something right.

Now you can dwell on your outfit! *lol*

I hope so. I think she's going to talk to him on Wednesday. She asked me for pictures and I literally only have like 2 pictures of myself alone from the last 3 years because I hate taking selfies. All my pictures have other people in them. Do you think they would be alright, or do I need to do a selfie photoshoot? lol

 

[bèlla]

I hope so. I think she's going to talk to him on Wednesday. She asked me for pictures and I literally only have like 2 pictures of myself alone from the last 3 years because I hate taking selfies. All my pictures have other people in them. Do you think they would be alright, or do I need to do a selfie photoshoot? lol

Take a fresh one during the daytime if you can near a window for natural light. Before noon! The light is softer.

Hair down. Wear something that brings out your eyes. Not too much makeup. BB cream, lipstick, mascara, and lip liner will do. Don’t go bare faced!

Use a timer. Take multiple shots. Edit the pic with a cool filter. They have a slightly blue tinge. They’re softer.

 

[Isaiah 2:22]

Take a fresh one during the daytime if you can near a window for natural light. Before noon! The light is softer.

Hair down. Wear something that brings out your eyes. Not too much makeup. BB cream, lipstick, mascara, and lip liner will do. Don’t go bare faced!

Use a timer. Take multiple shots. Edit the pic with a cool filter. They have a slightly blue tinge. They’re softer.

Wow, you're much more makeup literate than I am. I don't even own mascara. lol Always irritates my eyes and makes me unintentionally cry. I will admit that I look a lot better in makeup, though, as I don't have the best skin. What's BB cream?

 

[bèlla]

Wow, you're much more makeup literate than I am. I don't even own mascara. lol Always irritates my eyes and makes me unintentionally cry. I will admit that I look a lot better in makeup, though, as I don't have the best skin. What's BB cream?

Yeah, I know a bit.

BB Cream is similar to foundation but lighter. It gives you smooth coverage without heaviness.

 

[bèlla]

I wear Missha. It’s a Korean brand. Yes, I do K and J beauty.

Look at the results.

 

[DragonFox91]

I'm jealous! I want to go on a date!!!!

Is this 2 years knowing each other before dating, 2 years dating, or 2 years engagement? Because all of those sound waaaaaay too long. 1.5 years dating with a 6 month engagement sounds like about the limit to me.

She was saying 2 years from first date, basically. I was saying 5-10 years from first meeting to marriage.

Also wowzers, 1.5 years??? That seems really quick too. Actually it might be the same as bella's. Bella, did you include the engagement period in your 2 years?

Now I'm not at all surprised that you are feeling so hopeless about getting married. If you think it has to take 5-10 years from meeting someone to actually tying the knot. That's a really long time.

I always figured 1-3 years from first meeting to first date, years 3-4 casually dating each other, 5-7 more serious, 8-9 preparing for marriage, 10 married. That's how I always calculate it in my head. To me something like that makes sense. That does seem excessively slow, & I hope it wouldn't be that slow, but that seems realistic to me. Maybe 5 years. I would & I want to get married so much, but I think it's best to just play it safe w/ 5. 2 seems really really fast to me.

 

[DragonFox91]

I wish men could wear makeup