~Anastasia~
† Handmaid of God †
- Dec 1, 2013
- 31,133
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- Eastern Orthodox
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Confrontation has to be done carefully, and discerned if you are the correct person to be doing it. There is also some spiritual danger to the one doing the calling out - it MUST be done in humility and love, never in a critical condemnatory way.
One easy way to tell .... anytime you are "itching" to call someone out about their sin, you either aren't the right one to do it, or aren't in the right frame of mind. The right spirit is cautious, and wanting to spare the person in sin.
I've had it done to me, both rightly and wrongly. I've been on the other side, both knowing that I shouldn't because I wanted to (and I didn't, thankfully), and knowing that I must, but not wanting to (and thankfully God gave me very gracious things to say) and I've also become aware of situations where I was to say nothing, but only pray for them. This takes care and discernment, something it may not always be easy to figure out. This is best handled by a shepherd of the flock, whose responsibility it really is, or sometimes an elder kind of position in the body (which doesn't mean official, sometimes the older women need to gently guide the younger ones, for example).
And I'm not commenting on your situation, because I don't know. But the biggest indicator I've found is that any inclination to WANT to do it has been a wrong spirit, in my case, and the only times it was correct was when I didn't want to do it, but prayed much before hand and knew I had to, then went forward very, very carefully and with kindness.
It's funny, I've watched our priest handle such situations (minor things - anything major would surely be done privately) and I see he has a gift to be as Christ would be, always seeking to restore people and not condemn them. I've almost never seen that ability to that degree, so he serves as a good example for us and a blessing to the flock.
One easy way to tell .... anytime you are "itching" to call someone out about their sin, you either aren't the right one to do it, or aren't in the right frame of mind. The right spirit is cautious, and wanting to spare the person in sin.
I've had it done to me, both rightly and wrongly. I've been on the other side, both knowing that I shouldn't because I wanted to (and I didn't, thankfully), and knowing that I must, but not wanting to (and thankfully God gave me very gracious things to say) and I've also become aware of situations where I was to say nothing, but only pray for them. This takes care and discernment, something it may not always be easy to figure out. This is best handled by a shepherd of the flock, whose responsibility it really is, or sometimes an elder kind of position in the body (which doesn't mean official, sometimes the older women need to gently guide the younger ones, for example).
And I'm not commenting on your situation, because I don't know. But the biggest indicator I've found is that any inclination to WANT to do it has been a wrong spirit, in my case, and the only times it was correct was when I didn't want to do it, but prayed much before hand and knew I had to, then went forward very, very carefully and with kindness.
It's funny, I've watched our priest handle such situations (minor things - anything major would surely be done privately) and I see he has a gift to be as Christ would be, always seeking to restore people and not condemn them. I've almost never seen that ability to that degree, so he serves as a good example for us and a blessing to the flock.
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