Limbo

[dluvs2trvl]

I feel like I'm in this long...drug out....seemingly never ending limbo

I'm living with my parents to save money for my wedding in April. So I sort of feel like I don't have a place. I'm not in my "own" place where I can do things the way I want them and I'm not in my "new" place with Nathan. So I'm in limbo...

I also feel like I'm in limbo with my friendships My friends here are starting to do more and more things without me. I understand why...I'm out of town a lot visiting Nathan or he is in town visiting me but I miss my friends and when I try to set something up to see them...it seems that our schedules rarely match up

I can't really make new friends in my future hometown because I'm not there enough to really bond with anyone. A lot of the women ministry type activities take place during the week so I'm not able to attend those.

I know that this is just for a season but it's hard feeling like I'm stuck and not really able to move forward. Again, I totally know that this is just for a season but honestly, limbo stinks

Anyone else ever go thru something like this? A season where you felt stuck and not really able to move forward with your life the way you want to?

 

[ImperialPhantom]

Between September 08 and about July 09. No real time with friends, no money, no stability, and bills up the wazoo. It gets a lot better. It sounds like you have an end in sight, which is good.

 

[Starcradle]

I feel like I'm in this long...drug out....seemingly never ending limbo

I know that this is just for a season but it's hard feeling like I'm stuck and not really able to move forward. Again, I totally know that this is just for a season but honestly, limbo stinks

Anyone else ever go thru something like this? A season where you felt stuck and not really able to move forward with your life the way you want to?

Yes, and it is not a pleasant season. In my particular situation, there appears to be an end in view, yet it is uncertain. I am truly glad that you are not in a similar predicament.

Hang in there, D.

 

[IDDQD]

I'm not engaged, so I don't have these kinds of issues. =D

 

[Revived]

These windows are some of the best opportunities to grow spiritually.

Praying for you!

 

[white dove]

Anyone else ever go thru something like this? A season where you felt stuck and not really able to move forward with your life the way you want to?

Yes, very much so. Although, I will admit... I was really hoping this thread would be about the limbo game because that is one thing I'm pretty good at.

 

[Xenon]

Yeah, happened to me earlier this year. My girlfriend and I broke up, but there was still 3 months until I went off to school. I had no real friends left in my town to hang out with. I was also very poor at managing my free time, so I spent a great deal of it playing mindless video games instead of doing something productive. It seemed to drag on forever.

I would be going through a similar experience now that I'm on break from school, but God has taught me how to manage my time much more wisely than before. It also helps that He has built me up to resist doing the mind-numbing things that I used to do. Some things that helped me:

- Bible study and prayer
- Exercise of any type (push-ups, walking, biking, weight lifting, shoveling snow, etc.) for at least an hour a day
- Helping others out around the home and elsewhere
- Learning how to cook
- Christian Forums - Where Christian Community Meets Faith

It can be difficult, but if you can keep occupied, you will feel much, much better about yourself.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Between September 08 and about July 09. No real time with friends, no money, no stability, and bills up the wazoo. It gets a lot better. It sounds like you have an end in sight, which is good.

Yes...it is good that there is an end in sight. My fiance actually wanted to get married in January or February and I was the one that pushed for April Actually, in the end, I know it was the right decision. We'll be able to have the wedding we want and have a good jump off point financially for our married life together. Just feeling impatient I guess

Yes, and it is not a pleasant season. In my particular situation, there appears to be an end in view, yet it is uncertain. I am truly glad that you are not in a similar predicament.

Hang in there, D.

Thank you so much Star. I know you understand I'm still praying that your time is coming sooner rather than later

I'm not engaged, so I don't have these kinds of issues. =D

I don't think feeling like you're in limbo only happens when you're engaged. I think it can happen during a lot of different periods throughout life.

These windows are some of the best opportunities to grow spiritually.

Praying for you!

Thank you

Yes, very much so. Although, I will admit... I was really hoping this thread would be about the limbo game because that is one thing I'm pretty good at.

LOL! That would be a fun thread...how low can you go

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Yeah, happened to me earlier this year. My girlfriend and I broke up, but there was still 3 months until I went off to school. I had no real friends left in my town to hang out with. I was also very poor at managing my free time, so I spent a great deal of it playing mindless video games instead of doing something productive. It seemed to drag on forever.

I would be going through a similar experience now that I'm on break from school, but God has taught me how to manage my time much more wisely than before. It also helps that He has built me up to resist doing the mind-numbing things that I used to do. Some things that helped me:

- Bible study and prayer
- Exercise of any type (push-ups, walking, biking, weight lifting, shoveling snow, etc.) for at least an hour a day
- Helping others out around the home and elsewhere
- Learning how to cook
- Christian Forums - Where Christian Community Meets Faith

It can be difficult, but if you can keep occupied, you will feel much, much better about yourself.

Thanks for the post Yeah...I am getting a lot of things accomplished and do have ways to fill my time and keep busy I guess I'm just looking at what is ahead and wishing I was there instead of making sure I enjoy and appreciate where I'm at right now. I do need to do better at being content in the "spot" I'm in and not get caught up in the "grass is greener" syndrome.

 

[Marycita]

I'm sort of in a limbo as well - though not the same kind as yours - and while it feels unbearable in some ways, it's also beautiful in others. I don't think I would be getting as close to Jesus as I have been recently if I wasn't here now.

Praying for you, D!

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I'm sort of in a limbo as well - though not the same kind as yours - and while it feels unbearable in some ways, it's also beautiful in others. I don't think I would be getting as close to Jesus as I have been recently if I wasn't here now.

Praying for you, D!

Awww...that is so great that you are drawing closer to the Lord That is one thing I have noticed for myself as well. This "season" has given me a renewed vigor in my love for Him. And it isn't that this is a bad season so to speak...it's just a weird limbo feeling...not really living the life I had in the past but not really living the life I'm going to have in the future...just sort of here.

 

[Beautiful Fireball]

D, I don't post much here anymore but I had to log in to say congrats!!! I'm so excited for you! I hope you have a blessed wedding and marriage and that these next few months go quickly for you

 

[dluvs2trvl]

D, I don't post much here anymore but I had to log in to say congrats!!! I'm so excited for you! I hope you have a blessed wedding and marriage and that these next few months go quickly for you

Awww BF...I'm so glad to see you and IP again! Thank you for the congrats! Nathan sort of came out of no where and took me by surprise and boy am I glad he did I know that the next few months will most likely fly by, especially the closer it gets to the wedding but right now...I'm being impatient - gosh darn it

How are you guys doing? I think, last time I saw you on here, you guys had moved to Northern California (is that right?) Do you like it? Did you guys find good jobs?

 

[Beautiful Fireball]

Lol, I remember when IP and I got married, it was only 2 months after our engagement and I still thought it seemed like forever.

We're doing really well. IP joined the Air Force and is loving it. He's still finishing up his training so I'll be heading to Mississippi to join him, hopefully next month. It took us practically the whole year to find jobs, but we finally did. God has been good to us

How long have you guys been together?


Sorry if I'm totally derailing your thread

 

[bluelime2]

Anyone else ever go thru something like this? A season where you felt stuck and not really able to move forward with your life the way you want to?

Yeah. Sympathies for you, will pray

 

[Luther073082]

Melissa and I feel that way as well. Especially since we arn't sure yet if we are going to be in Jacksonville, FL or South Bend, IN.

Both have their advantages and disadvantages.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

Lol, I remember when IP and I got married, it was only 2 months after our engagement and I still thought it seemed like forever.

We're doing really well. IP joined the Air Force and is loving it. He's still finishing up his training so I'll be heading to Mississippi to join him, hopefully next month. It took us practically the whole year to find jobs, but we finally did. God has been good to us

How long have you guys been together?


Sorry if I'm totally derailing your thread

Derail away

Congrats on IP's enlistment and tell him THANK YOU for serving our country I bet you're excited to join him. I know how hard it is being away from Nathan and we're only 4 1/2 hours apart and see each other at least every other weekend if not every weekend so I bet you can't wait to reunite with IP

Nathan and I have been dating since May...got engaged in November (officially that is...we had been talking about getting married long before that ) and we're getting married April 10, 2010.

I waited a long time to find Nathan (or to have God bring him into my life that is ) but he was totally worth the wait

Yeah. Sympathies for you, will pray

Awww thanks...like I said before, it's not that this is so terrible or horrible...it's just uncomfortable and I'm not the most patient person either

Melissa and I feel that way as well. Especially since we arn't sure yet if we are going to be in Jacksonville, FL or South Bend, IN.

Both have their advantages and disadvantages.

I can understand how that would totally make you feel in limbo. When do you think you guys will make a final decision? What sorts of issues are hanging you up from making the final decision?

 

[ido]

I know you're anxious to move on to the next phase of your life, but maybe the dwindling friendships are a good thing. I know how close you are with your family and how frequently you see them. Moving to Nathan's will make seeing them as often unrealistic and will be yet another adjustment for you. So, maybe you can use the time you had planned for friends as extra time to spend with your family - to kind of cram in as much quality time as you can befor you go.

 

[Luther073082]

I can understand how that would totally make you feel in limbo. When do you think you guys will make a final decision? What sorts of issues are hanging you up from making the final decision?

Not sure, obviously sometime before the wedding.

The main issues at hand are Economy and cost of living.

South Bend is a cheap place to live. But the economy here is very very poor.

http://www.city-data.com/city/Jacksonville-Florida.html
http://www.city-data.com/city/South-Bend-Indiana.html


Also on top of that living in South Bend would mean having family around because everyone on my dad's side of the family (1st cousins, aunts & uncles, parents, grandmother) lives no further then 3 hours away. The majority live less then 1 hour away. With Melissa's parents moving soon after we get married, the CLOSEST family we would have would be 2 1/2 hours away if we lived in Jacksonville.

Also the weather is somewhat of an issue. Melissa's never really driven in the snow. She will have to learn because being able to drive in the snow and ice is an absolute necessity in this area.

Oddly enough it seems as though Melissa is more favorable towards living in South Bend, and I am more favorable to living in Jacksonville.

 

[dluvs2trvl]

I know you're anxious to move on to the next phase of your life, but maybe the dwindling friendships are a good thing. I know how close you are with your family and how frequently you see them. Moving to Nathan's will make seeing them as often unrealistic and will be yet another adjustment for you. So, maybe you can use the time you had planned for friends as extra time to spend with your family - to kind of cram in as much quality time as you can befor you go.

Yeah...that's what I'm trying to do It's an adjustment living with my parents again but I remind myself often what a blessing it is to have not only the opportunity to save money but also precious time with them

Not sure, obviously sometime before the wedding.

The main issues at hand are Economy and cost of living.

South Bend is a cheap place to live. But the economy here is very very poor.

Jacksonville, Florida (FL) profile: population, maps, real estate, averages, homes, statistics, relocation, travel, jobs, hospitals, schools, crime, moving, houses, sex offenders, news, sex offenders
South Bend, Indiana (IN) profile: population, maps, real estate, averages, homes, statistics, relocation, travel, jobs, hospitals, schools, crime, moving, houses, sex offenders, news, sex offenders


Also on top of that living in South Bend would mean having family around because everyone on my dad's side of the family (1st cousins, aunts & uncles, parents, grandmother) lives no further then 3 hours away. The majority live less then 1 hour away. With Melissa's parents moving soon after we get married, the CLOSEST family we would have would be 2 1/2 hours away if we lived in Jacksonville.

Also the weather is somewhat of an issue. Melissa's never really driven in the snow. She will have to learn because being able to drive in the snow and ice is an absolute necessity in this area.

Oddly enough it seems as though Melissa is more favorable towards living in South Bend, and I am more favorable to living in Jacksonville.

It makes sense that you would each be leaning towards the other place. You already "know" all about where you live and it is more exciting to look at living some place else. Sort of that whole the grass is greener thing. It's easy to focus on the negatives of where you currently live and only see positives in the new possibility because you've never lived there

I have no doubt you two will work it out and come up with the best decision for both of you