Does the Bible Prohibit Pre-Marital Sex?

[Kevin Snow]

Notice sex does not constitute marriage. Before marriage it is fornication to be repented of.

“And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee; and the mother of Jesus was there: And both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the marriage.” (John 2:1–2)

“The next day there was a wedding celebration in the village of Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the celebration.” (John 2:1–2)

Sex is the marriage. As it says here of a man who has sex with a virgin:

If a man meets a virgin who is not betrothed, and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found, then the man who lay with her shall give to the father of the young woman fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife. ~Deuteronomy 22:28-29

If you have sex with a virgin, then you are married to the person. The reason the marriage ceremony is so important is because it is a public vow you make before all the people. And God said:

If a man vows a vow to Yahweh, or swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word. He shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth. ~Numbers 30:2

 

[Kevin Snow]

Which they didn't have until after the marriage party.

That doesn't change it at all. They are still celebrating the union of two people. The fact that it is celebrated before doesn't change the fact that the UNION IS MARRIAGE IS SEX.

 

[Dave L]

That doesn't change it at all. They are still celebrating the union of two people. The fact that it is celebrated before doesn't change the fact that the UNION IS MARRIAGE IS SEX.

It is not. The apostles told the gentiles to abstain from fornication (sex). They did not tell them to abstain from marriage.

“But that we write unto them, that they abstain from pollutions of idols, and from fornication, and from things strangled, and from blood.” (Acts 15:20)

 

[Kiterius]

Beyond legalism, way beyond, is simply the question - why would anyone WANT to have sex outside marriage?

 

[Kevin Snow]

It is not. The apostles told the gentiles to abstain from fornication (sex). They did not tell them to abstain from marriage.

“But that we write unto them, that they abstain from pollutions of idols, and from fornication, and from things strangled, and from blood.” (Acts 15:20)

The word is inappropriate contenteias which actually means "sexual immorality." My bible translates it as such. It is all adultery. God commanded us to be faithful to the wife of our YOUTH. Which means, that the first thing we did is the most important. That is why we must stay true to the wife of our youth because the FIRST time is the ONLY real marriage. ALL other times is ADULTERY which is sexual immorality.

 

[JIMINZ]

I am a single heterosexual man, but I am not a virgin.
So far I have not found a single Biblical verse prohibiting pre-marital sex. But I am not a Biblical scholar. I know that some Christian denominations banned pre-marital sex. I would like to know their reasons for imposing this ban.

.
Adding to what others have said.

When you finally do get married, how many others do you want in your bed with your then wife, everyone you have had a sexual relationship with is there, sort of like an Orgy.

Bluntly, would you knowingly chose a Prostitute as a wife?....Why?

 

[dreadnought]

I am a single heterosexual man, but I am not a virgin.
So far I have not found a single Biblical verse prohibiting pre-marital sex. But I am not a Biblical scholar. I know that some Christian denominations banned pre-marital sex. I would like to know their reasons for imposing this ban.

Jesus tells us in Mark 7:20-23 not to fornicate. In Matthew 5:28 he tells us not to look lustfully at people. Giving up your virginity before you marry is one of the biggest mistakes you'll ever make.

 

[ubicaritas]

.
Adding to what others have said.

When you finally do get married, how many others do you want in your bed with your then wife, everyone you have had a sexual relationship with is there, sort of like an Orgy.

That's ridiculous purity culture scaremongering, and patently untrue.

 

[Desk trauma]

When you finally do get married, how many others do you want in your bed with your then wife, everyone you have had a sexual relationship with is there, sort of like an Orgy.

Not seeing the downside...

 

[Ignatius the Kiwi]

The biblical worldview supposes marriage as the legitimate means of sexual relations and I can't think of any story, narrative or teaching in the scripture that supports anything other. Being born a bastard is not portrayed as a good thing in the bible or even the grand arc of Church history.

Prostitution is condemned in the bible for what is more than purely monetary reasons. If free love is acceptable to the biblical writers there would be nothing wrong with Prostitution but it is routinely condemned in the bible again and again. Paul doesn't say to those who have sexual desires to just go have sex with whomever you want, he says to do it within the bonds of marriage. That command takes place in the context of sexual immorality occurring, what sort of sexual immorality is he talking about? It seems pretty obvious given his solution to the problem.

 

[Strathos]

I am fairly certain that it does.

 

[JIMINZ]

That's ridiculous purity culture scaremongering, and patently untrue.

.
Oh poo to you too.

 

[ubicaritas]

Not seeing the downside...

I'm serious. That kind of mentality is a good way to set yourself up with sexual dysfunction and a joyless marriage, if you think somehow your spouse isn't entitled to the same human imperfections everybody else has.

 

[Job3315]

I am a single heterosexual man, but I am not a virgin.
So far I have not found a single Biblical verse prohibiting pre-marital sex. But I am not a Biblical scholar. I know that some Christian denominations banned pre-marital sex. I would like to know their reasons for imposing this ban.

There’s something called soul ties. When people have sex its supposed to be the union of two souls, bodies and spirits. Many people have sex and leave part of their souls with others plus you get their spiritual garbage as well, opening the door to evil spirits. It becomes a mess.

When you get married you are making a commitment with that other person, so your union is linked together with God as your God and sustainer of the relationship. When you have premarital sex you are saying “this might not be the one”. That shows lack of commitment, respect and loyalty. Marriage is a serious commitment. Jesus even said not everyone is ready for it.

People who had premarital sex and remarry should pray a prayer to break soul ties. Kris Valloton has an amazing book called Moral Revolution. It explains how your virginity is a gift to your partner and viceversa. I cried when I heard that because so many people don’t see their virginity as a gift but as a curse. Kris also said once that he bought a welding tool and he was watching the instruction DVD on how to use it and the instructor said that when you weld two pieces of metal together they can’t be separated without creating damage/breaking, they’ll never be the same. He said that the Lord spoke to him through that video and he understood the importance of purity and marriage. I know many people remarry and the Lord heal their souls, I’ve even heard women who had their hymen healed by the Lord, but I always like doing things right from the start instead of having to ask for forgiveness later.

I wanted to have sex with a boyfriend but the Lord appeared in a dream and told me to wait. A few weeks later the guy dumped me because I didn’t want to sleep with him. The Lord even showed me I was going to get pregnant and lose the baby. I am really glad I waited.

Be wise

 

[SkyWriting]

You prove me right again! It clearly shows by scripture that it was the wedding celebration that they were all attending. And what are they celebrating? The UNION of two people. What is that UNION...the sex.

We don't know if they are going to have sex or not.
Some people are born without the equipment for it.
They might die at the wedding.
They might have disease that doesn't allow for
sex or that sex might not be desirable.
I just read about a woman living with AIDS
for 20 years. She might desire marriage
but not risk sex.

 

[SkyWriting]

Your experience can NOT interpret the word of God.

The word of God WILL and SHOULD interpret your experience.

Therefore, because the marriage is the fleshly union, what does this mean for your experience? Reinterpret your experience according to the truth of God's word.

You committed to the person and that's great but if there was no sex then there was no marriage.

Well, you are just mistaken. Not having been there, you wouldn't know
what marriage is all about. It's not about the sex.

And you are gravely mistaken about the world and scripture.
The scriptures use word-pictures constantly, which
are real world illustrations of scriptural truths.

The Bible is a book of vivid pictures. God used a picture language (Hebrew) to portray much of what He had to say to mankind. https://www.biblediscoverytv.com/word-pictures-from-the-bible/

How to Create Emotional Word Pictures

 

[Kevin Snow]

Well, you are just mistaken. Not having been there, you wouldn't know
what marriage is all about. It's not about the sex.

And you are gravely mistaken about the world and scripture.
The scriptures use word-pictures constantly, which
are real world illustrations of scriptural truths.

The Bible is a book of vivid pictures. God used a picture language (Hebrew) to portray much of what He had to say to mankind. https://www.biblediscoverytv.com/word-pictures-from-the-bible/

How to Create Emotional Word Pictures

You have no understanding of these things. The bible is NOT an American story and it does NOT have your American ideals and philosophy. But it is clearly strewn through your thinking.

But I speak the truth which is ancient and enduring and it has nothing to do with your mentality.

I'm telling you the truth: marriage is the sex. In fact the word sex didn't even exist and the only word to describe it was MARRIAGE. It's a modern corruption to separate intercourse from marriage.

And this is true for everyone. It doesn't matter whether you can have intercourse or not. That doesn't change the fundamental reality that since the beginning a man and woman were married through their fleshly union.

 

[SkyWriting]

You have no understanding of these things.

I guess I've been married longer than you,
so I do know what marriage is all about.
Inside and out and upside down.

Sex and sexual attraction comes and goes.
Some never have it. Some never experience it.
Marriage is commitment and if you're lucky
includes great sex. But the commitment
is what makes a marriage. I have a close
relationship with God, but no sex.

 

[comana]

.
Adding to what others have said.

When you finally do get married, how many others do you want in your bed with your then wife, everyone you have had a sexual relationship with is there, sort of like an Orgy.

Bluntly, would you knowingly chose a Prostitute as a wife?....Why?

This is exactly the type of puritanical teaching I grew up with and it is potentially very damaging.

Think of those who converted later in life and cannot erase their past sexual partners. Do you not believe they can commit to a healthy and happy marriage where their prior partners become irrelevant? The image of other sexual partners following them around like haunting ghosts is dysfunctional thinking.

Think or rape or sexual abuse victims who hide their perceived "filth" from the very community, who would help and support them, out of fear of judgement (perceived or real). An unintended result of such teaching certainly, but very real none the less.

Is a former prostitute not worthy of happiness in marriage?

 

[ubicaritas]

This is exactly the type of puritanical teaching I grew up with and it is potentially very damaging.

Think of those who converted later in life and cannot erase their past sexual partners. Do you not believe they can commit to a healthy and happy marriage where their prior partners become irrelevant? The image of other sexual partners following them around like haunting ghosts is dysfunctional thinking.

Think or rape or sexual abuse victims who hide their perceived "filth" from the very community, who would help and support them, out of fear of judgement (perceived or real). An unintended result of such teaching certainly, but very real none the less.

Is a former prostitute not worthy of happiness in marriage?

Puritanism doesn't care much about the folks that have to wear the scarlet letters.