Depression

[KleinerApfel]

You are a bunch of kind, loving, prayerful folks, thank you all so much for caring.

My tummy is feeling better this evening and that helps my mind somewhat too.
I'm just heading for bed now, and no work tomorrow so I can rest.

Other than that, I'm holding on as best I can each hour until the hours run to days and then we'll see.
God bless you all, good night.

 

[Strong in Him]

Dear Sue,

I won't say "I know how you feel", but I do know a little about having bad days and wondering what on earth is going on.

May God wrap his loving arms around you.

God bless you. He IS still there and won't let you go - ever.

 

[CindyisHis]

Don't think I could add anything to what has been said already. Please know I am praying, and I find great value in you.

 

[Christina M]

Here is a really encouraging audio about controlling our mind and feelings:

http://archiveserver.morelifenow.or...Control-02-ControllingYourMindAndFeelings.mp3

 

[ahmunmun]

I will pray for you, Sue.

You are one of the most caring people on this board.

 

[KleinerApfel]

Feeling so bad. Still think it's my fault, and that audio and another I listened to agree. So, if I am too weak and pathetic to push through and get victory, I'll be stuck in this forever. My fault, my fault, my fault. Guilty as hell, I deserve condemnation, just stone me.

 

[Criada]

Oh sis, please don't think like that.
Depression is an illness, it's NOT your fault!
You re a beloved daughter of God, and He is holding you.
Try to rest in that - He will bring you through this in time.
And He is there - even at the darkest times.

praying for you.

 

[KleinerApfel]

I don't want to take the pills again, they give me half a dozen side effects. I just want to be able to cope with normal life and I can't.
On top of finding everyday life exhausting and stressful - a life that is relatively easy compared to many, yet i sturggle - on top of that I must live with the knowleged that my weakness hurts those close to me. I can't live with all this guilt any more.

 

[Criada]

Sis, God's strength is made perfect in our weakness.
You don't have to be strong... just let Him do it, and trust Hm.
I know how you feel - I am at the end of myself at the moment... but He is faithful.
God bless you.

 

[Augustina]

I go to a forum and there are a lot of young people on there. They all cry and tell how depressed they are. Not meaning this is what you are doing..They all come and talk to me about their problems..adopted mom of the forum I guess. I have not had problems with depression for quite some time. Yet I have noticed that all these kids around the same time all start getting depressed and then I noticed that depression tried to come on me. I say there is a spirit of depression that searches out and looks for the ones it can bother. I tell these kids to cast out. In the name of Jesus spirit of depression be gone. It temporarily leaves them, but comes back about a month or so later. Since I have been talking with these children that are depressed, depression has tried to attach to me. I will realize this and command it to leave. It does. For he that is in me is greater than he that is in the world.... Hoping this post does not offend you. It is not meant to offend. God Bless you..

 

[KleinerApfel]

Yes Augustina, it works a bit, for a time, sometimes. But after months of attack, and when I have a history of 40 years of this, I just get weary and can't do it any more. I am at the point of thinking it's not worth crawling back up only to be kicked back when I almost reach the top. I never quite get there, I thought 2 or 3 times I had, but within months I was down again.

Maybe if I'd known Jesus in my youth, maybe if someone had taught me that I could fight, maybe I'd be different. I have to fight all the time to cope with life, and even when the enemy isn't directly thrashing me I do it to myself because that's how my mind has been set up.

Yes, I know Jesus renews my mind as I meditate on His word. Just seems not to be working just now.

My fault I guess. Should know better by now.

 

[KleinerApfel]

(By the way - Well done for teaching those kids and mothering them, God bless you.)

 

[ralangley]

One idea came to me that may or may not resonate with you...

I'm curious, if there is something in you that satan knows is powerful and threatening? Right before a major depression episode, do you get a sense of this power, this special gift you have? Sometimes its right as we reach a mountain, that we must face the valley. If this is the case, let us know so we can pray specifically for this.

 

[lismore]

Hey Sue

Are you doing any better tonight?

Hope so.

 

[KleinerApfel]

One idea came to me that may or may not resonate with you...

I'm curious, if there is something in you that satan knows is powerful and threatening? Right before a major depression episode, do you get a sense of this power, this special gift you have? Sometimes its right as we reach a mountain, that we must face the valley. If this is the case, let us know so we can pray specifically for this.

Never felt powerful, on the contrary I'm generally feeling inadequate, always wanting more of God, seeking Him for healing for others - at the moment for my dog who is dangerously ill. But no, I have never felt I'm a threat to the enemy. However, he might feel it I suppose.

I think I am going to have to start the pills again, this isn't going away.

 

[Chogo]

I think it's got me again, I can't make it stop.
I thought I was healed, but it comes back and comes back. A few months at most and it comes back.



And please don't tell me what a crap Christian I am for allowing this. I know.

If you want to get rid of depression, love God like you have never loved him before. His joy in your love will come back to you.

 

[Augustina]

(By the way - Well done for teaching those kids and mothering them, God bless you.)

Thank you. God bless and I pray that God touch you and set you free. *BIG HUG*

 

[zaksmummy]

Get back on those pills asap. They will make a big difference and in a couple of weeks you should start to feel better.

Just remember to pace yourself in the meantime, and make sure you have plenty of helpful support around you, people you can trust who encourage you.

Remember that depression is a physical illness, it may be affected by spiritual things, but if you suffer from symptoms such as early morning waking, feeling worse in a morning, slowed down thoughts, poor concentration, short memory loss and sometimes anxiety, then it has a physical component that needs treating sooner rather than later.

 

[Criada]

Have you read "When the Darkness will not ift" by John Piper?
It's very short, and I found it incredibly helpful.

And remember, your righteousness is in Christ, not in anything you do or don't do. It's not your fault, sis - when God looks at you, He sees Jesus. And He loves you very, very much.

 

[SavedByGrace3]

Are the pills you take designed to treat the symptoms or are they aimed at a chemical imbalance in your brain?