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Depression

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KleinerApfel

When I awake I am still with You
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I found the day of teaching and prayer very difficult and am struggling this morning.
It all seems so "religious" somehow - do this, do that, get it right ....THEN God might show Himself to you and give you the guidance and the comfort you can't find.

I just need to TRUST God. Sounds simple doesn't it? What if I can't? What if I think I am but really I'm not? What if I am a little but not enough? What if I do sometimes, for some things, but not for everything?

Will He judge me like they do and say I didn't make it?

All I know is, no, He is not judging me.

So I am in rebellion because despite all that, still I wrestle with my life and whether i am truly worth any bother at all. Arguing with God who says I am precious. How dare I? Ridiculous isn't it?



What a wretched woman I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?
Thanks be to God— through Jesus Christ our Lord!
 
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freedomnchrist

Blessed by the BEST!!!
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Might I add that I was diagnosed with PTSD, Major Depression, Sever Panic Disorder and Anxiey. I was on 300mg Welbuterin and 300 mg Zoloft as well as 25mg of Resperdol. Xanax's too. God healed me but I had to a lot of the work myself as well. I sometimes get that dread feeling...you know what I mean....but it helps to realize a lot of times it is a mind thing. I start to act goofey then think to myself...it is ok...it will only last a minute then it will go away...then I listen to some praise music. It helps me.
 
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