Asked to leave church by an Usher

[Jeff11]

In other words, he offered you a seat and you refused (or at least, that's what he thought).

I didn’t refuse a seat. I simply did not want to have to step over 10 people to get to a seat in the center of the aisle to only have to get up 15 minutes later to go to the restroom due to a medical condition I have. I had only walked in for about five minutes. When he very rudely asked me to leave.

Ushers are generally used when finding a seat on your own is difficult. For example, in very crowded churches.

 

[Jeff11]

From just your one post, yes.


Just noticed, he left almost a year ago.....
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Says the guy who hasn’t posted in 11 months

 

[Victor in Christ]

 

[Jeff11]

From just your one post, yes.


Just noticed, he left almost a year ago.....
Jeff11
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Strange comments from someone who hasn’t been on this board in over a year.

 

[RDKirk]

Churches are not like other privately owned public places, but they do have the right to do as they see fit in such matters. Not all see it necessary to have that tight a security --not by a long shot-- but apparently this church did, so let it be. They at least are not walking you through a metal detector or shaking you down. That day may come.

I can imagine a church back in the early days of persecution, and how careful they had to be.

In my old denomination, there was a specific portion of the service where they "opened the doors of the church" to new members. This occurred at the end of the service after all the "prosecutable" parts of the service had been completed. I image that many years ago, this was a literal "opening of the doors of the church" because new members might not have been allowed to participate or even see those earlier parts of the service.

The church I attended before becoming Orthodox, began locking all the exterior doors once the service began. Arrive late, and you didn't get in.

With regard to people coming in tardy, in my favorite congregation (over the course of my many military moves), people who arrived after the sermon started were ushered to a side auditorium where the service could be watched on closed-circuit television.

 

[RDKirk]

i would not describe It as offering to seat me. It was more like him telling me he was going to find a seat for me or I was going to have to leave. And it completely rubbed me the wrong way.

Being rubbed the wrong way is a function of the direction of the rubber and the direction of the rubbee.

Either one can change direction to resolve the issue.

 

[Mark Quayle]

In my old denomination, there was a specific portion of the service where they "opened the doors of the church" to new members. This occurred at the end of the service after all the "prosecutable" parts of the service had been completed. I image that many years ago, this was a literal "opening of the doors of the church" because new members might not have been allowed to participate or even see those earlier parts of the service.

Interesting!

 

[Jeff11]

Being rubbed the wrong way is a function of the direction of the rubber and the direction of the rubbee.

Either one can change direction to resolve the issue.

I don’t think you realize what happened. I walked into the auditorium and literally I got to the Aisle and stood for maybe a minute looking through the dark for seating and was told by an usher he was either going to find me a seat or I had to leave. It was the rudest thing I’ve ever experienced in a church by far.

Secondly I’ve watch these ushers before I attended several times previously. They will find you a seat that will require you to step over 15 to 20 people that’s in a center of an aisle. I previously stated I’ve got a medical condition that requires me to sometimes go to the restroom two or three times during the service. That is not gonna work for me.

That’s the reason I was looking. I wanted to find my own seat because I would prefer to sit outside the auditorium then interrupt people by getting up during the middle of the service.

The problem is further compounded because I tried to explain this to the person who was head of security at the church which I didn’t even know existed and he only cared about one thing either confronting the usher or essentially confronting me period.

And I chose to leave rather than have a confrontation with the usher in the middle of the service. I hope that kind of explains better what happened.

 

[RDKirk]

I don’t think you realize what happened. I walked into the auditorium and literally I got to the Aisle and stood for maybe a minute looking through the dark for seating and was told by an usher he was either going to find me a seat or I had to leave. It was the rudest thing I’ve ever experienced in a church by far.

What was that quote...exactly?

Secondly I’ve watch these ushers before I attended several times previously. They will find you a seat that will require you to step over 15 to 20 people that’s in a center of an aisle. I previously stated I’ve got a medical condition that requires me to sometimes go to the restroom two or three times during the service. That is not gonna work for me.

That’s the reason I was looking. I wanted to find my own seat because I would prefer to sit outside the auditorium then interrupt people by getting up during the middle of the service.

The problem is further compounded because I tried to explain this to the person who was head of security at the church which I didn’t even know existed and he only cared about one thing either confronting the usher or essentially confronting me period.[/quote]

So the head of security only cared about "confronting" the usher or "confronting" you, as you say. So...what would have been wrong with him "confronting" the usher who you said was being rude to you? What did you want him to do?

And I chose to leave rather than have a confrontation with the usher in the middle of the service. I hope that kind of explains better what happened.

It doesn't, actually, because I don't know how reliable a reporter you are, and that is not meant to besmirch your character. Some of the most well-meaning people are unreliable reporters of incidents in which they are personally involved. That's why Jesus requires us to have two or three witnesses to prove every accusation, such as you're making here, before rendering a judgment.

 

[Jeff11]

What was that quote...exactly?

Secondly I’ve watch these ushers before I attended several times previously. They will find you a seat that will require you to step over 15 to 20 people that’s in a center of an aisle. I previously stated I’ve got a medical condition that requires me to sometimes go to the restroom two or three times during the service. That is not gonna work for me.

That’s the reason I was looking. I wanted to find my own seat because I would prefer to sit outside the auditorium then interrupt people by getting up during the middle of the service.

The problem is further compounded because I tried to explain this to the person who was head of security at the church which I didn’t even know existed and he only cared about one thing either confronting the usher or essentially confronting me period.

So the head of security only cared about "confronting" the usher or "confronting" you, as you say. So...what would have been wrong with him "confronting" the usher who you said was being rude to you? What did you want him to do?



It doesn't, actually, because I don't know how reliable a reporter you are, and that is not meant to besmirch your character. Some of the most well-meaning people are unreliable reporters of incidents in which they are personally involved. That's why Jesus requires us to have two or three witnesses to prove every accusation, such as you're making here, before rendering a judgment.[/QUOTE]

I don’t even know how to respond. You weren’t even there yet you’re telling me my memory is faulty Because it’s not consistent with what you imagine the events were?

 

[coffee4u]

I think the usher was very rude. My guess is it was a reaction to your physical presence as I doubt if you were a little old lady they would have had security talk to you. If a church is so large as to require an usher (I am from the country were anything from 6-40 people would be a normal service) and they come up to you and ask if they can get you a seat is to say "Due to health reasons I need to sit at the back" This gives them enough information without a lengthy explanation or the awkwardness of them finding you a non suitable seat.

 

[RedPonyDriver]

I got tossed out of a church for singing "better" than the worship leader. Seriously not kidding.

 

[sunshineforJesus]

I am so sorry this happened to you.That is awful.

 

[Jeff11]

So the head of security only cared about "confronting" the usher or "confronting" you, as you say. So...what would have been wrong with him "confronting" the usher who you said was being rude to you? What did you want him to do?



It doesn't, actually, because I don't know how reliable a reporter you are, and that is not meant to besmirch your character. Some of the most well-meaning people are unreliable reporters of incidents in which they are personally involved. That's why Jesus requires us to have two or three witnesses to prove every accusation, such as you're making here, before rendering a judgment.

I don’t even know how to respond. You weren’t even there yet you’re telling me my memory is faulty Because it’s not consistent with what you imagine the events were?[/QUOTE]

 

[Jeff11]

I don’t even know how to respond. You weren’t even there yet you’re telling me my memory is faulty Because it’s not consistent with what you imagine the events were?

[/QUOTE]

So the head of security only cared about "confronting" the usher or "confronting" you, as you say. So...what would have been wrong with him "confronting" the usher who you said was being rude to you? What did you want him to do?



It doesn't, actually, because I don't know how reliable a reporter you are, and that is not meant to besmirch your character. Some of the most well-meaning people are unreliable reporters of incidents in which they are personally involved. That's why Jesus requires us to have two or three witnesses to prove every accusation, such as you're making here, before rendering a judgment.

I don’t even know how to respond. You weren’t even there yet you’re telling me my memory is faulty Because it’s not consistent with what you imagine the events were?[/QUOTE]

I asked to speak with Security because I did not think that this was how he was supposed to behave. It completely shocked me that they were instructed to ask people rudely to leave as he had done me.

I thought by speaking to Security they would address this issue I didn’t think it was part of their policy. After speaking to him I want to make it clear than that I was not gonna be returning to the church and this is the reason why. So if they want to keep the policy in place this is some of the expectations they will get. In addition I

 

[Jeff11]

From just your one post, yes.


Just noticed, he left almost a year ago.....
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Says the guy who hasn’t posted in a year and a half

 

[Bobber]

Just seems like an excuse by “security” at the church to throw their weight around. I’m not going to be treated like a subordinate at a place I can choose to attend or not.

So Jeff you don't consider they're a real loving church right?

Might I shock you by asking you so what?

Have you ever stopped to consider that that's the place God might be calling you to go? To an unloving church....so that they can see your love and kindness and your very presence starts changing them. You might consider to the spiritually mature God might lead them to other brothers and sisters in Christ that need help in being conformed to the image of Christ in other words....to make them more loving.

Heard a minister say this one time and this guy I put right up there with being one of the most clear at hearing God in my life. He said God told him to take the Pastorship of a church that no one else wanted. The people were most of the time in strife or carnality. But God told him that's the place I want you! You can help them come out of their babyhood carnality.

You're not alone Jeff. People come on these boards lamenting they can't find a loving church. Consider you might be the solution for a lot of people in a place that needs help to learn to become more loving. Church should be considered a spiritual hospital. Some people or many people may not be well there. Consider that they might need YOUR help.

Who knows. By being a loving person there guess what? The usher who you claimed wasn't nice might come up to you some day and ask you if you remember that day. And if he said then, "Hey I want to apologize thinking back on it I think I was wrong!" Guess what? Love between you and him now and you'd consider him a dear brother. People aren't perfect. They make mistakes. Will we be the ones however to show them grace or do what anyone can easily do....walk in the flesh just like them? God delights when he sees his children become more mature and be more of a part of a solution rather than a part of the problem. The choice if ours. What will we be?

 

[Jeff11]

So Jeff you don't consider they're a real loving church right?

Might I shock you by asking you so what?

Have you ever stopped to consider that that's the place God might be calling you to go? To an unloving church....so that they can see your love and kindness and your very presence starts changing them. You might consider to the spiritually mature God might lead them to other brothers and sisters in Christ that need help in being conformed to the image of Christ in other words....to make them more loving.

Heard a minister say this one time and this guy I put right up there with being one of the most clear at hearing God in my life. He said God told him to take the Pastorship of a church that no one else wanted. The people were most of the time in strife or carnality. But God told him that's the place I want you! You can help them come out of their babyhood carnality.

You're not alone Jeff. People come on these boards lamenting they can't find a loving church. Consider you might be the solution for a lot of people in a place that needs help to learn to become more loving. Church should be considered a spiritual hospital. Some people or many people may not be well there. Consider that they might need YOUR help.

Who knows. By being a loving person there guess what? The usher who you claimed wasn't nice might come up to you some day and ask you if you remember that day. And if he said then, "Hey I want to apologize thinking back on it I think I was wrong!" Guess what? Love between you and him now and you'd consider him a dear brother. People aren't perfect. They make mistakes. Will we be the ones however to show them grace or do what anyone can easily do....walk in the flesh just like them? God delights when he sees his children become more mature and be more of a part of a solution rather than a part of the problem. The choice if ours. What will we be?

OK that’s fair criticism.
My personal opinion is that are you go where you feel comfortable. I guess the best analogy would be family atmosphere. Asking people to leave it’s just the complete opposite of what I was looking for. It’s just a business with security like others in fact I would say let’s security than most businesses in this area.
Life’s too short to spend it in an environment where are you don’t feel valued as a member.

I personally feel most churches do not need Security Gleason at this level where are you actively ask people to leave the church grounds if they can’t be seated. It’s absolutely unnecessary.