Asked to leave church by an Usher

Jeff11

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.
 
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Don't be offended, they have a job to protect the congregation. I saw a time when all doors were unlocked and no security cameras, unfortunately those days are gone. We are wheat among the tares..
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redleghunter

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.
That does seem rude. However since the church shooting in Texas last year, many deacons and ushers when closing the doors at service start are a bit wary of late comers. Ushers and deacons bird eye spaces and want to seat late comers.

I’d say he was just a bit taken off guard as most won’t refuse help. Plus you become a “free radical” so to speak for security reasons. He didn’t know who you were.

I remember showing up at a church when out of town. I immediately came up to the usher, told him I was visiting and where I came from. He was very polite.

There was a parody article from the Babylon Bee which addressed the frustration of some deacons and ushers. You will like this.

Church Solves Tardiness Problem By Volunteering All Latecomers To Children's Ministry
 
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Anthony2019

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I'm sorry to hear of your experience at the church. Regardless of the seating situation, everyone should be made to feel welcome and I think the usher could have handled things in a more diplomatic and caring way. If that happened to me, I would be very pleased to leave it and never go back. Why would anyone want to be part of a church that treats people as a 'number' rather than someone who is special and valued by God. I am very confident there will be other churches around which will treat you with courtesy and dignity and make you feel very welcome.
 
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chevyontheriver

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.
I would hate to be an usher these days, always wondering if some person I had never seen before might turn into an active shooter spraying the congregation with bullets. Not that you would, but I would not like to be that person who got it wrong and didn't protect the congregation in these loony times. Sorry that it happened to you.
 
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Oldmantook

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.
Ahh...nothing like brotherly love (sarcasm). The usher could have still made you feel welcome by politely explaining the reason for their protocol (safety, etc) and by doing so would likely not be perceived by you as rude. Perhaps more "usher training" is called for.
 
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Oldmantook

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I would hate to be an usher these days, always wondering if some person I had never seen before might turn into an active shooter spraying the congregation with bullets. Not that you would, but I would not like to be that person who got it wrong and didn't protect the congregation in these loony times. Sorry that it happened to you.
That's why I like armed ushers. :)
 
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Jeff11

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Thank youfor your very polite and considerate replies it does make me feel better.

the earlier church service I had attended the pastor spoke about how things which happen to us which appear negative like losing a job, being forced to relocate, that later when we get perspective would be a positive change that you hadnt realized yet. It seemed particularly relevant today.

I have recently been diagnosed with diabetes and a couple of the issues that come up are the need to frequently go to the restroom and to drink fluids. Which possibly would make me have to get up during the service which is why I wanted to seat myself. I was not trying to be difficult but I have some good reasons as to why I need to sit somewhere that it’s easy for me to get up during the service.

And for what it’s worth I’m actually 6’1 and 175 lbs. I’m not overweight and this is not something that I can manage by losing weight. this is a medical condition that I can’t control through diet and exercise like some people with diabetes can.
 
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JAYPT

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.

I think this is just the times we live in and chalk it up to a new experience and dont let it eat you, forgive the person and move on. You mentioned that this is one of a few churches that you are attending, maybe this is a church that you now cross off the list?
 
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Jeff11

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I think this is just the times we live in and chalk it up to a new experience and dont let it eat you, forgive the person and move on. You mentioned that this is one of a few churches that you are attending, maybe this is a church that you now cross off the list?
That’s what I was planning to do. unfortunately this was probably the church I liked the most. It was closest to my home and it was one of the larger churches in my area. Till this happened I thought it was gonna be a good fit for me.
 
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Mark Quayle

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.

The other churches I have attended don’t even use ushers and they certainly don’t stand in the back asking people to leave if they don’t get seated.

Churches are not like other privately owned public places, but they do have the right to do as they see fit in such matters. Not all see it necessary to have that tight a security --not by a long shot-- but apparently this church did, so let it be. They at least are not walking you through a metal detector or shaking you down. That day may come.

I can imagine a church back in the early days of persecution, and how careful they had to be.
 
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Sketcher

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I moved to this area about nine months ago and have been attending a handful of CHURCHES during this time. Been looking at Three or four different churches that I have been attending.

So I had attended an earlier church service at a different church I arrived late. I was standing in the back looking for a seat when in usher asked me if I wanted to be seated and I told him I would find one.

At which point he told me I could not stand back there I would have to leave. This caught me off guard and seemed a little rude to me and as I was leaving the church in the lobby i asked to speak to one of the staff. Which point I had about a 10 minute conversation with someone who said they were head of Security.

Apparently they want to keep the back of the church clear in case there is an emergency and most of the ushers were members of first responders. I thought this was a little bit over kill he also seem to think that the usher was acting appropriately.
Honestly, it sounds like their concerns and manner of acting are reasonable.

It amazes me that churches are now asking people to leave if they do not immediately find a seat. It was dark and I wanted the lights to come on. They turn the lights down for the music portion of their service.
Did you tell them that?

I have recently been diagnosed with diabetes and a couple of the issues that come up are the need to frequently go to the restroom and to drink fluids. Which possibly would make me have to get up during the service which is why I wanted to seat myself. I was not trying to be difficult but I have some good reasons as to why I need to sit somewhere that it’s easy for me to get up during the service.
Understandable. Did you tell them that? Not all of the details would be needed, but that you have a medical issue that may force you to get up during the service and use the restroom may suffice.

Is it wrong to think that asking people to leave is inappropriate? I’ve always thought ushers are supposed to be welcoming and encouraging people to attend the service not asking people to leave.
That's another part of what an usher has to do, not just in churches, anywhere.
 
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JAYPT

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That’s what I was planning to do. unfortunately this was probably the church I liked the most. It was closest to my home and it was one of the larger churches in my area. Till this happened I thought it was gonna be a good fit for me.
Well my friend sometimes its not about what we want ;) Maybe, just maybe you're being guided in a different direction, take your time, it will all become clear. :)
 
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ilovejcsog

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On the other hand under the circumstances mentioned above, he did offer to seat you probably with a thought that you could be a shooter as mentioned. I think it is important in these times that they try to alleviate any fearful thoughts caused by strangers coming in late..
 
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ilovejcsog

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Don't give up on them if this is your favorite. Frequent the church and be on time and let them seat you. After a while you will know if you wish to stay.
God Bless you and them.
 
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Jeff11

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Thank you all for your input.

I do think the issue of violence is a little bit overblown in the media. From what I have read, violent crime Is actually at a 30 year low in this country.

The problem is that shootings tend to be high profile with multiple victims which the media immediately picks up.

The other issue that I want to bring up is that I feel like the situation could’ve been diffused if the usher would’ve been courteous and respectful. For example, Telling someone to leave instead of asking someone and having some patience in this situation would’ve went a long way.

I got the impression that both he and the security chief were either Ex-military or law-enforcement and were used to giving people orders which to me is not appropriate in a church environment to me. Where I live there’s an Air Force Base, possibly They were X military officers.
 
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Oldmantook

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That’s what I was planning to do. unfortunately this was probably the church I liked the most. It was closest to my home and it was one of the larger churches in my area. Till this happened I thought it was gonna be a good fit for me.
Any house churches in your area as that may be an option for you.
 
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Anthony2019

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I have been very blessed by joining a new church recently. The moment I walked in, I was met by two ushers who were very concerned about me. They were concerned that I was new and needed a special welcome. They were concerned that I had a cup of tea, was introduced to other people in the church, and that I had people to sit next to so I didn't feel I was alone. This week I saw the same ushers welcome a homeless man into the church and gave him a cup of coffee. They came to me and introduced me to him.

That is what ushers are meant to do - to spend their time ushering people in, rather than ushering people out!

I have found my favourite church - it is where the love of God is experienced and reflected by His people.
 
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