Did you meet r/t? I’ve dated locally, nationally and internationally. The furthest was Australia and he spent a year and a half here. Cheating is a nice way of saying options. You weren’t the final answer. When you get to that point others don’t exist.
So we're talking two different situations, one was online in which we had been corresponding for 3 years before the door was opened to romantic possibilities, I put myself out there, but she was hesitant. I waited when I should have run, but I was naive. If I had it to go do over again, I wouldn't have. It was one of the most humiliating experiences I've suffered through, but anyway, as I was waiting, she decided that she wanted to be in a committed relationship with me. We agreed that we'd work together on meeting up in real life and all that. Then out of nowhere, she went dead silent on me for the first time in over 3 years, we didn't exchange any messages. I figured maybe she was busy, maybe her internet went out, blah blah blah, was worried as Hell, but didn't send a billion messages, I waited for her.
The next message I recieved was breakup letter, that made no sense, blamed God, preached at me, it was a very strange experience, as if it had been written by someone who didnt know me at all.
I found out afterwards from a mutual friend, that another guy was involved, that she was hesitant at first because she wasnt sure how this other guy felt and then apparently, she assumed he wasnt interested, and so settled for me. Shortly after, I guess she found he was interested, and then she carried on with him behind my back for i dont know how long before she finally ended. So to me, that seems like cheating, not "options"-- whatever that means, but uh, hey, I'm not very experienced, so...
The second scenario was a cashier at my old store. We were in the same friends circle for a while, got kinda close, but then she'd have to leave for long periods of time because she was Armed Forces reserve, and they would send her to training in Hawaii, or Tech School in Texas and stuff like that. It was kind of hard to get momentum, because it was sorta like starting from scratch each time they left and came back. And then for like a solid year, we went to every movie that came out, some more than once, mini-golfing, go-karting, laser tag, bookstores, cafes, parades, carnivals, festivals, and when we were too busy to hangout in person, we played video games and voice-chatted, which we also did late into the night, every night even after we'd hung out until late evening.
We were really good friends, but she was awful at mixed signals. Just the worst, every time she would say something that could be a hint, she would follow it up amd ruin it, so I getting just constant yellow light, red light, green, yellow, red, lol. I made myself pretty clear, and left it in her court if she wanted friendship or more. She cornered me into asking her out, so I did. We had our first "official date", she acted like everything was great, said everything was great, asked me to hangout with her the next day, so i cooked for her, and had her over to my house for dinner, video games/movies, which was not the first time she'd hung out at my house, nor was it the first time she'd met my family.
she flirted with me the whole night, even in front of my parents, joked with me in private, begging me not to stop dating her, sent me all mushy "I'm so glad I found you" texts as I was wishing her a good night on the phone.
i mentioned we ought to tell a mutual friend we were dating so he wouldnt hear it from someone else, at first she said it wasnt his business, so I said okay. Then i wake up the next morning and shes texted me, saying she thought it over and I should tell our mutual friend so he doesn't hear from someone else. I say okay, and I text him.
Half a day later, Ive told the guy whats up, taken my lunch break and returned to work. My boss leaves, and I get a text on snapchat. She was pretending to like me all along, she's really sorry, she cares for me so much, and it would break her heart if I didn't still wanna be friends..... Like 3 weeks later one of the associates tells me she's dating our mutual friend, and a few minutes later, they walk by holding hands... The saddest part of all is the dude was desperate, and would have jumped at the chance to get back with her, she didn't need me to make him jealous, one text from her, and he would have been hooked xD
Of course there is. Telling you otherwise is disingenuous. You’re a white man in a society where most who share your hue desire to marry or consider it. The same holds true for the church.
Finding the stumbling block allows you to surmount it and put your best foot forward. If you want to pretend and spend another ten here that’s your choice.
I'm confused. Are you saying the color of my skin is the stumbling block, or my desire to marry is the reason why women don't see me as a catch?
And also, I know too many girls who think the ex-con with neck tattoos who deal drugs at the skate-park are a catch- I don't think women have these amazing nets for finding catches as you've described
