If Gentiles were supposed to be leaders in the church, why didn't the Lord choose any Gentiles to be apostles?
No it isn't; that is the whole point.
If it was clear, we would not have these endless debates, and no church would ordain women - unless you are suggesting that clergy, and learned, intelligent, spiritual bishops have wilfully chosen to ignore Scripture and do it anyway.
All Christians - God's children - have a right, and duty, to do whatever their Father calls them to do. It doesn't matter if men are in "women's" roles, or vice versa. It is God who calls and appoints us to serve him.
In the OT, Deborah was judge over the whole nation; men went to her for advice and counsel.
Huldah was a prophet; men chose to consult her when they wanted a word from God.