What's on your mind?

[Tone]

you need the gift of discernment.

This is more confirmation and I've asked for it (discernment).

 

[Tone]

Ask Him to redeem what the locusts have eaten and the time.

Yeah,

I wish I could share some details with you and maybe get some advice...

 

[bèlla]

Yeah,

I wish I could share some details with you and maybe get some advice...

Trust the process. Uncertainty is part of it. It forces you to look to Him. He'll get a word to you when the time is right. Meanwhile, keep this in mind. His purposes won't be thwarted. There's nothing you've done He didn't expect. So relax.

 

[bèlla]

Speaking of the Lord's will...

I saw a comment by someone I'm acquainted with on social media. The initial post was directed to women and singing the praises of marriage and being a stay-at-home wife. Someone replied and said it wasn't a realistic ideal. She noted her want to marry and have a family but it never happened.

He chimed in and acknowledged the difficulty of finding the same and the necessity of higher wages to pull it off. I didn't plan to say anything. But I felt he overlooked an important factor that compels a man to be the sole provider. And I told him privately.

The motivation is character. Men don't do that for women with questionable morals. While they may find the behavior enticing in others; he doesn't want his wife to behave that way. It provided an opportunity to reinforce the merits of godly values and restraint. That's the first component of attracting a worthy partner.

Some of these girls are too uncouth. They've obliterated their femininity. They need to dial it down 50 notches. There's an art to being a woman. You don't learn it by mimicking him.

I don't know if the Lord put that on my heart or not. But I know he'll chew on it.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

 

[Tone]

I'm just leaving an AA meeting.

We read a bit of the "Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions".

This really resonated with me, on the bottom of page 93:

"Someone who knew what he was talking about once remarked that pain was the touchstone of all spiritual progress."

Then I got to thinking how the world's economy is centered around throwing fake money around to keep one far from any pain.

Well, this is the exact opposite of true value ...pain is money.

 

[Tone]

Trust the process. Uncertainty is part of it. It forces you to look to Him. He'll get a word to you when the time is right. Meanwhile, keep this in mind. His purposes won't be thwarted. There's nothing you've done He didn't expect. So relax.

Amen.

 

[Tone]

I was thinking earlier that when it doesn't work out between two people, it's a result of fear.

I'd say that most people have some fear (trepidation, anxiety, stress) when embarking on a new relationship (romance).

Sometimes one person may have more fear than the other.

Also, one party may not have much fear at all, at first...and then the fear in the other party may spread...

...until it permeates the relationship.

So, I guess the main thing to consider is whether or not the two can overcome the fear, or will they flee into more comfortable fear levels with someone else.

Now that's the ideal couple...a fearless man and woman...

Who can stand against something like that?!

 

[GospelS]

I was thinking earlier that when it doesn't work out between two people, it's a result of fear.

I'd say that most people have some fear (trepidation, anxiety, stress) when embarking on a new relationship (romance).

Sometimes one person may have more fear than the other.

Also, one party may not have much fear at all, at first...and then the fear in the other party may spread...

...until it permeates the relationship.

So, I guess the main thing to consider is whether or not the two can overcome the fear, or will they flee into more comfortable fear levels with someone else.

Now that's the ideal couple...a fearless man and woman...

Who can stand against something like that?!

Fear is lack of trust in God’s grace and His doing. People who don’t know themselves very well are those that fear. Some think they do know themselves but it gradually shows up in various forms.

There’s more confidence and peace than fear when the person knows and really believes he/she is being led by God. There’s only good fear and that’s needed. Their heart is resting in Him and you can sense the comfort and quietness that comes from it. They have no fear of losing anything or giving it all away. They already did that before with Christ and they love it. All that they have is Christ’s and nothing will be taken of that from them. They have nothing more of themselves to be anxious or stressful. The more you have, the more you give and the more is added to you.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 1 John 4

 

[Tone]

They have no fear of losing anything or giving it all away. They already did that before with Christ and they love it. All that they have is Christ’s and nothing will be taken of that from them.

I like this.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. 1 John 4

One of my theme verses, thanks!

 

[bèlla]

I was thinking earlier that when it doesn't work out between two people, it's a result of fear.

I encourage you to begin reading the threads in the Courtship forum. You'll encounter numerous situations that will enlighten you on the subject.

Relationships end for many reasons. Whether we're referencing friendship or something more. Fear is one of several causes that may lead to its decline. To view it as the lone catalyst is errant. Character failings and incompatibility are usually the reasons.

Unlike previous generations we aren't privy to lengthy acquaintance with our suitors. We weren't bosom friends nor were they our classmates. Our knowledge is limited and decisions are made with that in mind.

Just because we like someone or feel a measure of chemistry doesn't mean it's a done deal. It takes more than that to build a life together. No one should pledge themselves to someone they're not willing to spend their lives with. Or remain in a connection until something better comes along.

Sometimes the reasons for parting are hard to swallow. We make excuses and devise explanations when the truth is simple. They don't want us. They want to build their lives with someone else. Accepting it can be hard. But we have to move on.

It isn't a question of overcoming fear. It's a matter of mutual investment. If they're determined to stay the course they will. If you're determined to do the same you shall. Now you're united.

 

[Tone]

I encourage you to begin reading the threads in the Courtship forum. You'll encounter numerous situations that will enlighten you on the subject.

Relationships end for many reasons. Whether we're referencing friendship or something more. Fear is one of several causes that may lead to its decline. To view it as the lone catalyst is errant. Character failings and incompatibility are usually the reasons.

Unlike previous generations we aren't privy to lengthy acquaintance with our suitors. We weren't bosom friends nor were they our classmates. Our knowledge is limited and decisions are made with that in mind.

Just because we like someone or feel a measure of chemistry doesn't mean it's a done deal. It takes more than that to build a life together. No one should pledge themselves to someone they're not willing to spend their lives with. Or remain in a connection until something better comes along.

Sometimes the reasons for parting are hard to swallow. We make excuses and devise explanations when the truth is simple. They don't want us. They want to build their lives with someone else. Accepting it can be hard. But we have to move on.

It isn't a question of overcoming fear. It's a matter of mutual investment. If they're determined to stay the course they will. If you're determined to do the same you shall. Now you're united.

Below the many reasons lies the root of fear.

Fear of poor character, fear of failure, fear that they're not the right fit, fear of the unknown, fear that what they have is not enough, fear that they can't build, fear that there is someone/something better, fear that the investment will have no return, fear that they will be separated, etc...

 

[bèlla]

Below the many reasons lies the root of fear.

Fear of poor character, fear of failure, fear that they're not the right fit, fear of the unknown, fear that what they have is not enough, fear that they can't build, fear that there is someone/something better, fear that the investment will have no return, fear that they will be separated, etc...

Futures aren't founded on sugarplums. And building ones hopes on expectations can lead to disappointment. We ought to be satisfied with the product as-is.

If it improves we celebrate their becoming. If they don't we're happy and content. Many a man has felt the sting of falling short. I wouldn't resign anyone to that fate.

 

[angelsaroundme]

"Thunderstorms in Georgia are common, especially during Spring and Summer. The number of thunderstorm days per year ranges from around 50 in the mountains of northeast Georgia to around 55 across the southern extremity of Peachtree City's CWA (Local Climatological Data)."

 

[Tone]

Futures aren't founded on sugarplums. And building ones hopes on expectations can lead to disappointment. We ought to be satisfied with the product as-is.

If it improves we celebrate their becoming. If they don't we're happy and content. Many a man has felt the sting of falling short. I wouldn't resign anyone to that fate.

Yeah, I fear this is where I've been failing...keeping the fear out, since I believe this does rest primarily on the man.

I had hoped that our agreement and request, that He would direct our paths as we acknowledge Him in our way, would keep the doubt...out.

Well, I guess our going separate ways must be the answer to our prayers.

There is a song that says, "The fear of failure is the one thing taking you there.", I can't recall the band right now.

 

[bèlla]

Yeah, I fear this is where I've been failing...keeping the fear out, since I believe this does rest primarily on the man.

Why is it your responsibility to do so? You can't micromanage a connection.

I had hoped that our agreement and request, that He would direct our paths as we acknowledge Him in our way, would keep the doubt...out.

Sometimes it brings you together and other times it leads you elsewhere. If you have to do that much handling early on it isn't a good sign. The bond should grow organically. Too much steering derails it.

Well, I guess our going separate ways must be the answer to our prayers.

There is a song that says, "The fear of failure is the one thing taking you there.", I can't recall the band right now.

I don't know how you'd build a future with someone you didn't believe in. You'd have to tie yourself in knots to pull it off.

I can't fathom being with someone who didn't think the world of me.
Who didn't believe I was worth it.
I wouldn't settle for less.

 

[bèlla]

We started watching Bridgerton today and couldn't stop. The Duke is a heart throb and his onscreen presence is wonderful! We'll finish it tonight.

 

[Tone]

Why is it your responsibility to do so? You can't micromanage a connection.

Don't you believe that the man should make the proposal?

You know, lay out the plan and determine execution.

Sometimes it brings you together and other times it leads you elsewhere. If you have to do that much handling early on it isn't a good sign. The bond should grow organically. Too much steering derails it.

We were both headed in the same direction and were like-minded in our beliefs. And the physical attraction was sssmmoookinng.

And then it seemed like she wanted to steer too much, after we agreed that He Build the house.

I don't know how you'd build a future with someone you didn't believe in. You'd have to tie yourself in knots to pull it off.

I can't fathom being with someone who didn't think the world of me.
Who didn't believe I was worth it.
I wouldn't settle for less.

I believed.

 

[bèlla]

Don't you believe that the man should make the proposal?

You know, lay out the plan and determine execution.

For the relationship or something else?

And then it seemed like she wanted to steer too much, after we agreed that He Build the house.

How long were you involved? Is it possible you expected too much too soon?

 

[Tone]

For the relationship or something else?

The relationship was ministerially focused, which was agreed to.

This is why I say she picked up another lens...or steered away.

It wasn't supposed to be a conventional engagement.

She even felt like I was an answer to her prayer to at least have some companionship for the short time we have left, whether to "the end of all things" or just in our individual lives.

So why try to conform what we had to relational gurus, therapists, mentors, etc...?

How long were you involved? Is it possible you expected too much too soon?

It was a very short time.

All I expected was for us to continue with the belief and excitement we began with...like you said, just grow organically.

I guess I shoulda left the "M" word out of it.

Though she was just as eager and bout it initially as well.

But then she seemed to want to pack as much relational therapy in as possible. But why even mess with that stuff if we haven't even had enough time to get there naturally?!!!