I have been doing some research on spankin your child, in my research, I have decided I would do a scripture search alone with a google search and the worldly thoughts on this matter, so lets see what the bible says verses the world, shall we?
I'm guessing since this is in the christian part of the forum we all believe everything the bible says right? We do not nit pick out what we want to believe because the whole bible is Gods word not just what we want to believe.
Bible says:
He who spareth the rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him correcteth him betimes (Proverbs 13:24)
Withhold not correction from a child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell. (Proverbs 23:13-14)
Prov 20:30 (The blueness of a wound cleanseth away evil: so do stripes the inward parts of the belly.)
1John 1:9 (If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.)
Deut. 25:1-3 ( 1If there be a controversy between men, and they come unto judgment, that the judges may judge them; then they shall justify the righteous, and condemn the wicked.
2And it shall be, if the wicked man be worthy to be beaten, that the judge shall cause him to lie down, and to be beaten before his face, according to his fault, by a certain number.
3Forty stripes he may give him, and not exceed: lest, if he should exceed, and beat him above these with many stripes, then thy brother should seem vile unto thee.)
Prov. 22:15 (Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.)
Heb 12:7-11 (7If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?
8But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.
9Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
10For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of his holiness.
11Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.)
Eph 6:4 (And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.)
2 Tim 3:16 (All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness
Lev 26:28 (Then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury; and I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins.)
Deut. 22:18 (And the elders of that city shall take that man and chastise him
1 Kings 12:11 (And now whereas my father did lade you with a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke: my father hath chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions.)
Ps. 6:1 (O LORD, rebuke me not in thine anger, neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure.)
Prov. 3:11 (My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction
Ex 21:15 and 17 (15And he that smiteth his father, or his mother, shall be surely put to death.
17And he that curseth his father, or his mother, shall surely be put to death.)
Deau. 21:18-21 (18If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and that, when they have chastened him, will not hearken unto them:
19Then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city, and unto the gate of his place;
20And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard.
21And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel shall hear, and fear.)
From a site on disciplne:
DO NOT FALL DOWN
“Do not fall down in your job as a parent, for you will also be held responsible for the condition of your children’s souls when they are brought to Us.” - Our Lady, February 11, 1971
SPARE THE ROD, SPOIL THE CHILD
Veronica - Now Saint Joachim is walking over; he's standing now between Saint Anne and Our Lady. Now Saint Joachim is standing there. He has a long--it looks like a rod in his hand. And he's standing there holding the rod up, and he's saying:
St. Joachim - "In one hand you will hold the Book of life, and the other, discipline."
Veronica - And he's brandishing the stick, like this.
St. Joachim - "Humanism in your world has been created by satan. You will bring back the adages of old of 'Spare the rod, and you will spoil the child.' Discipline must be returned to the homes.”- July 25, 1973
BE FIRM
"Man has lost his purity. All parents must guard the children's souls. Be firm with your children. The fashions grieve all Heaven.
"The time is short, so you must make reparation now, and learn to recognize the signs. You must be guided by the light. The Holy Spirit will always be with you. Remain close to My Son. So many will be lost.” - Our Lady, August 5, 1970
FIRMNESS IS NEEDED
"I wish that all fathers of households stand forth and practice their role. They will use the rod and not permit their children to go astray. Firmness is needed in your world that is filled with laxity, permissiveness, and degradation.
"Your children have been misled by many who shall answer to the Father. As teachers they have failed in their role. Therefore, as parents you must succeed in yours.” - St. Joseph, March 18, 1973
STRONG DISCIPLINE AND LOVE
"I have asked you, I have directed you, as your Mother, to retire--retire from your world that has been given to satan. You must earn your daily bread by living in the world, but you must not become of the world. Your children must be guided with a strong discipline and love. But this love must be coming from the light, My children, for so few cry love, and they have lost the true meaning of love. For love is your God the Father in Heaven.” - Our Lady, September 7, 1976
Distinguishing Spanking from Abuse
Corporal punishment is often defined broadly as bodily punishment of any kind. Since this definition includes spanking as well as obviously abusive acts such as kicking, punching, beating, face slapping, and even starvation, more specific definitions must be used to separate appropriate versus inappropriate corporal punishment.
Spanking is one of many disciplinary responses available to parents intended to shape appropriate behavior in the developing toddler and child. It is an adjunctive corrective measure, to be used in combination with primary responses such as restraint, natural and logical consequences, time-out, and restriction of privileges.
Child development experts believe spanking should be used mainly as a back-up to primary measures, and then independently to correct deliberate and persistent problem behavior that is not remedied with milder measures. It is most useful with toddlers and preschoolers from 18 months to 6 years of age, when reasoning is less persuasive.
Moreover, child development experts say that spanking should always be a planned action by a parent, not an impulsive reaction to misbehavior. The child should be forewarned of the spanking consequence for each of the designated problem behaviors. Spanking should always be administered in private. It should consist of one or two spanks to the child's buttocks, followed by a calm review of the offense and the desired behavior.
Spanking
The Act: Spanking: One or two spanks to the buttocks
The Intent: Training: To correct problem behavior
The Attitude: With love and concern
The Effects: Behavioral correction
Physical Abuse
The Act: Beating: To strike repeatedly (also kick, punch, choke)
The Intent: Violence: Physical force intended to injure or abuse
The Attitude: With anger and malice
The Effect: Emotional and physical injury
The following is a quote from Dr. Laura Schlessinger's book, Parenthood by Proxy: Don't Have Them If You Won't Raise Them:
Over my years in broadcasting, I have been amazed at the growing sense of impotency in parents. Often when I make concrete suggestions the response is, "But isn't that kind of tough? I mean--doing that will have a long-range effect on their lives."
As will the results of their acts of defiance! This is why I always recommend creative, swift and terrible action so that children take their parents seriously and learn "the lesson" permanently. This technique works wonders with children used to continuous pouting, arguing, negotiating, manipulation, and who easily tolerate feeble consequences to behave badly. (p. 187)
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Christopher Lasch quotes from Arnold Rogow, who argues that
American parents, alternately "permissive and evasive" in dealing with the young, "find it easier to achieve conformity by the use of bribery than by facing the emotional turmoil of suppressing the child's demands." In this way they undermine the child's initiative and make it impossible for him to develop self-restraint or self-discipline; but since American society no longer values these qualities anyway, the abdication of parental authority itself instills in the young the character traits demanded by a corrupt, permissive, hedonistic culture. (Christopher Lasch, The Culture of Narcissism, p. 178)
The following is a quote from Dr. Laura Schlessinger's book, Parenthood by Proxy: Don't Have Them If You Won't Raise Them:
A major source of today's parenting problems is the psychologizing of our culture. In Grandma and Grandpa's time, misbehavior was viewed as a moral issue of right and wrong, acceptable and unacceptable, permitted and not permitted. Simple as that. Basically, kids were kids; that is, narcissistic, antisocial, noisy, nasty, distracted, and so forth.
The old solution would be punishment. The goal of the punishment was to teach accountability, self-control, the consequences of wrong choices, thinking before acting, and the important fact that they are obligated to respect rules of authority.
Then came the shrinks. The psychology community suggested that bad behavior is either the result of some psychological problem (low-esteem is a favorite) or some biological problem (brain chemistry and food allergies are popular).
The basic notion is that the child ultimately lacks free will. Since he is so upset or so gene-dysfunctional, he cannot consciously choose his actions; he is mysteriously driven by powers beyond his control. It follows that if he is not in control, he is not responsible. This means that discipline and punishment are bad; understanding is good.
The end result of this is disaster. The perpetrator is the victim. (And don't forget, the abused victim is now entitled to perpetrate ... and so it goes.) The perpetrator need only point some finger of blame at a past experience and, abracadabra, escape wrath and punishment and obtain a perverted sainthood all at once!
Parents are intimated by this psychological garbage into backing of from disciplining--instead shellacking their children with a coat of understanding, acceptance, and patience.
I took alot of this from websites that speaks of discipline.
Now here is what some people say about (Does Spanking Work for All Kids?)
Does Spanking Work for All Kids?
Q:I have spanked my children for their disobedience, and it didn’t seem to help. Does this approach fail with some children?
A: Children are so tremendously variable that it is sometimes hard to believe that they are all members of the same human family. Some kids can be crushed with nothing more than a stern look; others seem to require strong and even painful disciplinary measures to make a vivid impression. This difference usually results from the degree to which a child needs adult approval and acceptance. The primary parental task is to see things as the child perceives them, thereby tailoring the discipline to his or her unique needs. Accordingly, a boy or girl should never be so likely to be punished as when he or she knows it is deserved.
In a direct answer to your question, disciplinary measures usually fail because of fundamental errors in their application. It is possible for twice the amount of punishment to yield half the results. I have made a study of situations in which parents have told me that their children disregard the threat of punishment and continue to misbehave. There are four basic reasons for this lack of success:
1. The most common error is whimsical discipline. When the rules change every day and when punishment for misbehavior is capricious and inconsistent, the effort to change behavior is undermined. There is no inevitable consequence to be anticipated. This entices children to see if they can beat the system. In society at large, it also encourages criminal behavior among those who believe they will not face the bar of justice.
2. Sometimes a child is more strong-willed than his parent—and they both know it. He just might be tough enough to realize that a confrontation with his mom or dad is really a struggle of wills. If he can withstand the pressure and not buckle during a major battle, he can eliminate that form of punishment as a tool in the parent’s repertoire. Does he think through this process on a conscious level? Usually not, but he understands it intuitively. He realizes that a spanking must not be allowed to succeed. Thus, he stiffens his little neck and guts it out. He may even refuse to cry and may say, “That didn’t hurt.” The parent concludes in exasperation, “Spanking doesn’t work for my child.”
3. The spanking may be too gentle. If it doesn’t hurt, it doesn’t motivate a child to avoid the consequence next time. A slap with the hand on the bottom of a multidiapered thirty-month-old is not a deterrent to anything. Be sure the child gets the message—while being careful not to go too far.
4. For a few children, spankings are simply not effective. The child who has attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), for example, may be even more wild and unmanageable after corporal punishment. Also, the child who has been abused may identify loving discipline with the hatred of the past. Finally, the very sensitive child might need a different approach. Let me emphasize once more that children are unique. The only way to raise them correctly is to understand each boy or girl as an individual and design parenting techniques to fit the needs and characteristics of that particular child.
