• Welcome to Christian Forums
  1. Welcome to Christian Forums, a forum to discuss Christianity in a friendly surrounding.

    Your voice is missing! You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world.

    We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!

  2. The forums in the Christian Congregations category are now open only to Christian members. Please review our current Faith Groups list for information on which faith groups are considered to be Christian faiths. Christian members please remember to read the Statement of Purpose threads for each forum within Christian Congregations before posting in the forum.

Featured Single - how to find a partner?

Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by blackhole, Jun 22, 2019.

  1. Peter J Barban

    Peter J Barban Well-Known Member

    808
    +504
    Christian
    Married
    I don't want too much of your personal information, but you need to consider how you deal with intellectual conflict. Many people make the mistake of thinking, "If everyone were as smart as me, we would all get along".

    An intellectual woman will have an independent mind and will often disagree with your facts and thinking. You two may have a lot of conflict despite your most treasured intellectualism. And she will likely be as stubborn as you are.

    So, the way you deal with conflict on these forums will likely be a prelude to how you deal with your potential intellectual girlfriend.

    Are you ready to rumble!!!
     
  2. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    Yes. And that's a good reason to want someone similar to myself. I'm usually nice to people who are willing to consider facts, even if they disagree with me. I have an EE buddy like that. We debate the most volatile topics, and taking opposite positions doesn't matter as long as we're willing to consider data and rational arguments (even though we may interpret them differently).

    But when people refuse to consider facts because they believe feelings trump facts (e.g. progressives), or put forth other ridiculous nonsense which shows that they're not only closed minded, but believe I'm in the wrong for not taking their view, or refuse to even consider vital issues--I become sarcastic or annoyed. Or, I know I'm wasting my time, so I dismiss them.

    If I got a bubbly girl, I'd be constantly sarcastic and dismissive. That's not good.
     
  3. Peter J Barban

    Peter J Barban Well-Known Member

    808
    +504
    Christian
    Married
    Sounds well reasoned. Good luck on your quest.
     
  4. blackribbon

    blackribbon Not a newbie

    +6,002
    Christian
    Hey...bubbly girls can be intellectuals too...and very good with sarcasm in a fun way. "Bubbly" is a personality, not a measure of intellect nor ability to have a deep rational conversation. Before life broke me down and exhausted me, I was terribly bubbly and it perplexed many of my BFs that I could still challenge them intellectually. I still have my moments with the right people... :D. My chemistry teacher in high school used to argue with me that smart girls like me shouldn't be cheerleaders....LOL. And I've gotten in an argument with a date because he couldn't believe that my first degree was in bioengineering (he was an engineer). At the time, I was back in school in nursing.
     
  5. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
  6. blackribbon

    blackribbon Not a newbie

    +6,002
    Christian

    Those "personalities" in those tests aren't really considered accurate or objectively scientific or psychologically. Because most are self-reported, they are biased and very subjective. They can be fun but that is about it. They don't give real or objective information. Intellectual is a person who likes to use and exercise their intelligence...and any personality type can be an intellectual. It is not a personality type even if some of those "personality" tests like to call one of their temperaments by that name.

    And bubbly or not, I qualify as an INTJ "the engineer" in the intellectual category of the Briggs-Myers test. However, again, it isn't really considered a scientific personality type...more just a way to categorize people in groups.

    Before you challenge my information, please reference at least one scholarly source that says these test are 'real'. If it is real and scientific, you should have no problem sourcing multiple scholarly articles.
     
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2019
  7. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    I stated that intellectual is a personality, without any evidence offered.
    You stated that bubbly is a personality, without any evidence offered.

    I offered my link as evidence that intellectual is a personality.
    You offered no evidence that bubbly is a personality.

    You indicated that intellectual isn't a personality, by the way that you juxtaposed it against bubbliness (and a second time, in the quote of your usage below). In other words, you were first to deny my claim - not the other way around.

    That may or may not have been your intention (you switch from intellectual to intellect between sentences), and not knowing: I responded by offering a form of evidence for my original claim that intellectual is a personality type. So, I'll turn this around: can you provide scholarly evidence that bubbly is a personality?

    You also stated:

    "Intellectual is a person who likes to use and exercise their intelligence...and any personality type can be an intellectual."​

    Compare with the britannica (personality | Definition, Types, Nature, & Facts), which states:

    "It includes behavioral characteristics, both inherent and acquired, that distinguish one person from another and that can be observed in people’s relations to the environment and to the social group."​


    I'm willing to denying the validity and reliability of the MBTI. Frankly though, this seems like a pointless argument over semantics. I'll concede that intellectual and bubbly personalities might coexist, when allowing my understanding of intellectual and your understanding of bubbly (though it would be more precise to call them parts of a personality.)

    ---

    Note: the volume of misuse of a tool via self-report doesn't make the tool biased. For example: the MMPI is now available online for free. If enough people use it without oversight of a professional, does everyone's (even professionally-administered) test become invalid? ... But for other reasons, I agree that the MBTI is flawed, and perhaps even broken.
     
    Last edited: Jun 26, 2019
  8. Robin Mauro

    Robin Mauro Active Member

    338
    +136
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    A pet doesn't talk back; a human being does
     
  9. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    What if I had compared with parrots instead of dogs?
     
  10. Robin Mauro

    Robin Mauro Active Member

    338
    +136
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    Why are you comparing humans with animals in the first place?
    I trust you did not intend to be mean. Perhaps you had not thought it through.
     
  11. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    Because the comparison is valid for the factors that I identified.

    I did think it through.
     
  12. blackribbon

    blackribbon Not a newbie

    +6,002
    Christian
    A lot of spouses don't communicate any better than a dog. And last I looked, humans were still animals. My husband called me Hunny Bunny. Should I have been offended?
     
  13. blackribbon

    blackribbon Not a newbie

    +6,002
    Christian
    Not worth fighting over. The Briggs Myer personality test isn't scientific no matter who administers it. Bubbly isn't either. My issue was when you pulled out the NP Briggs Myer to contradict my statement that a person can be intellectual and bubbly. I don't believe personality is quantified yet. But it really doesn't matter.
     
  14. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    No, I didn't use it to deny that a person can be both. I explained my intent in my response.
     
  15. Robin Mauro

    Robin Mauro Active Member

    338
    +136
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    Comparing a woman to a pet is not right.
    Also, about the name, a body of gravity from which nothing can escape. Also used as in where'd the money go? Down a black hole. That's what I thought it meant...both.
     
  16. blackhole

    blackhole Member

    190
    +81
    United States
    Christian
    Single

    Mat 15:25 Then came she and worshipped him, saying, Lord, help me.
    Mat 15:26 But he answered and said, It is not meet to take the children's bread, and to cast it to dogs.
    Mat 15:27 And she said, Truth, Lord: yet the dogs eat of the crumbs which fall from their masters' table.
    Mat 15:28 Then Jesus answered and said to her, O woman, great is your faith: be it to you even as you will. And her daughter was made whole from that very hour.

    Amo 4:1 Hear this word, you cows of Bashan, that are in the mountain of Samaria, which oppress the poor, which crush the needy, which say to their masters, Bring, and let us drink.




    Why are you obsessed with my username?
     
  17. blackribbon

    blackribbon Not a newbie

    +6,002
    Christian
    I think that Solomon's beloved is lovingly compared to a variety of animals multiple times in Song of Solomon. I don't know why it bothers you to compare two beings that are deeply loved.
     
  18. Robin Mauro

    Robin Mauro Active Member

    338
    +136
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    So now you are calling women you might possible date cows and dogs...good luck with that.
     
  19. ChicanaRose

    ChicanaRose Well-Known Member

    +1,050
    United States
    Christian
    Private
    I think the woman not being intellectual is something you could compromise, whereas you shouldn't compromise on moral or spiritual issues.

    It may be a good balance to find someone who is not an intellectual. She may have other strengths that you could benefit from.
     
  20. LaBèlla

    LaBèlla ❣️ His little lady ❣️ Supporter

    +4,061
    United States
    Non-Denom
    Celibate
    I’m an ENTJ and Enneagram 3. I am an intellectual overachiever who appreciates kindred spirits. I don’t like overly emotional men. I prefer a pronounced masculinity that isn’t effeminate.

    Mental connections are deeply satisfying. Its another form of relating and mental chess never hurts if he can keep pace. ;-)

    I feed my mind continuously and would be thoroughly bored with a companion who didn’t do likewise.
     
Loading...