On getting ordained for my friends marriage...

[Verve]

A very close friend of me asked me if I would be willing to get ordained and perform their wedding ceremony.

I'm already going over their self-written vows and having another Christian look them over to be sure I'm not saying anything I shouldn't.

Basically, I'm looking for advice. Any particular service I should go through to get ordained to perform the ceremony? There are several online.

In case this has anything that might help with your response I'm an American Baptist. I've also been praying about going into full-time ministry.

I'd be thankful for any advice or help at this point.

 

[papaJP]

A very close friend of me asked me if I would be willing to get ordained and perform their wedding ceremony.

I'm already going over their self-written vows and having another Christian look them over to be sure I'm not saying anything I shouldn't.

Basically, I'm looking for advice. Any particular service I should go through to get ordained to perform the ceremony? There are several online.

In case this has anything that might help with your response I'm an American Baptist. I've also been praying about going into full-time ministry.

I'd be thankful for any advice or help at this point.

______________)))))))++++++++++++++++_____+))))))))))))))))

Do not do this if you are not called by God. I would advise that you based on what you have written here are not close to being ready.

 

[Verve]

______________)))))))++++++++++++++++_____+))))))))))))))))

Do not do this if you are not called by God. I would advise that you based on what you have written here are not close to being ready.

Please back up what you say with specific questions or reasons instead of just making a judgement.

 

[Gabe7]

I've heard the Unitarian Church will ordain you online. Just shoot em an email.

 

[fat_boy]

If you google the term "ULC" you will find a service that will ordain you for free. It isn't strictly Christian though, more eccumenical! for a laugh I got myself orgained online with them 3 years ago.

Then I became a Christian

Can I just say, I think you should do it, your friend seems to be paying you a massive compliment by asking you to do it! I'm a big believer that God speaks to us through other people, you've been praying about ministry and now someone is asking you to be a minister, go God!!

Insofar as services and such, I would recommend you do what I did this easter and spend a week or so shadowing a pastor/vicar/priest/whatever to get an idea of what goes on in terms of preparing for a wedding and such. It's obviously more than the ceremony itself, its the preliminry work, the effects on relatives and the couple, the spiritual warfare side and so forth.

I would perhaps advise speaking to ministers of various denominations if you can. You're a Baptist, which is awesome, but they may have Catholics or Quakers or whatever denomination you can think of in the family, the last thing you want to do is say something that upsets one of their close family members.

 

[Aibrean]

Oh good grief.

 

[fat_boy]

Oh good grief.

Care to elaborate on that? Or are we just trolling?

 

[Aibrean]

Woman + ordination = good grief

And on that note - as long as you bring an ordained minister and they speak the pronouncement (by the power vested in me by bla bla bla, etc) you might be able to officiate the rest. Larry the Cable guy did it in Vegas...

 

[seajoy]

Oh good grief.

In total agreement with your good grief.

 

[seashale76]

In total agreement with your good grief.

Same. I wish more people had a sacramental view of marriage. What the OP's friend wants and what is right doesn't coincide in this case.

I had my marriage blessed (Crowning) and if I had it to do over again- not only would I have become Orthodox much sooner- I would do anything to have never been married in a Baptist church in the first place (which probably constituted what we Orthodox Christians consider the Betrothal). If only my only choice would have been if I wanted the Russian or the Byzantine version of the various non-negotiable songs in the marriage ceremony that is done the same way for everyone in the Orthodox Church- by a priest!

 

[SoldierOfSoul]

I agree with the orthodox believers on this one.

 

[Verve]

Same. I wish more people had a sacramental view of marriage. What the OP's friend wants and what is right doesn't coincide in this case.

I had my marriage blessed (Crowning) and if I had it to do over again- not only would I have become Orthodox much sooner- I would do anything to have never been married in a Baptist church in the first place (which probably constituted what we Orthodox Christians consider the Betrothal). If only my only choice would have been if I wanted the Russian or the Byzantine version of the various non-negotiable songs in the marriage ceremony that is done the same way for everyone in the Orthodox Church- by a priest!

I'm skeptical of your advice considering you seem to be insulting my denomination in your post. If you have bitterness that has nothing to do with the OP can you direct it in another thread or PM me to explain the problem you have with your brothers and sisters in Christ?

 

[fat_boy]

Woman + ordination = good grief

Really? People still have a problem with this?

 

[seashale76]

I'm skeptical of your advice considering you seem to be insulting my denomination in your post. If you have bitterness that has nothing to do with the OP can you direct it in another thread or PM me to explain the problem you have with your brothers and sisters in Christ?

I'm not bitter- I'm regretful for what I consider wasted time.

Anyway, your denomination isn't all that keen on women being ordained. Having a FIL who is an ordained SBC minister and has his ThD from one of their seminaries, a MIL and SIL who used to work at said seminary, parents who go to an SBC church, and other people in the family who are Landmarkist Baptists- I happen to know a thing or two about this. People who happen to be of a more liberal bent (my in-laws for example) could tell you that what you're wanting to do will not go over well. There's a reason they went to a much more liberal UCC. When Mohler came into power- the more liberal types were black-listed to an extent- and even perceived liberals were booted from faculty positions at the seminaries and had difficult times finding a church to pastor- and many of these were men. I really don't think the SBC has changed all that much in the eleven years since I've been there.

ETA: I just googled American Baptists- and they have little in common with the Baptists I'm familiar with beyond the Baptist title. You have apparently already made up your mind- and I'm actually failing to see the point of this thread in light of this. What exactly do you need advice on? You don't have sacraments- you don't believe in them- the reason for having a male priesthood is pointless when you don't believe the rest. Just do what your friend wants to do if you're going to go through with it. You have no tradition to refer to- so you really can make it up as you go along and please your friend's whims if you're so inclined.

 

[citizenthom]

Are you married yourself, Thankful? And have you had training in premarital counseling and marital theology, even above and beyond your own preparations for marriage?

If not, it would be a LOT harder for you to evaluate your friends' readiness for a Christian marriage--which is what an officiant SHOULD be able to do before he is willing to marry two people. You would be doing a great disservice to them by allowing them to skip that step. And even if you are married, without full pastoral training your knowledge base is limited to your own experiences and not any broad-based or clinical experience in marital counseling.

It just sends up a big red flag to me that your friends want you to get ordained SPECIFICALLY so that you can marry them. Why don't they want to go through an established pastor who knows them and has done their premarital counseling?

As a friend, you should be encouraging them to take the hard, narrow, but healthy road toward marriage--not a shortcut like this.