I feel like giving up..

[Neostarwcc]

I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.

We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.

Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.

 

[Unqualified]

Do what you know to do… Go back to basics.

 

[Joseph G]

...and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.

The importance of daily Bible study and prayer, to avoid starvation:

Matthew 4:1-4 NIV

"Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”
Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

Matthew 6:11 NIV

"Give us this day our daily bread."

John 6:32-40 NIV

"Jesus said to them, “Very truly I tell you, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is the bread that comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

“Sir,” they said, “always give us this bread.”

Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty."

"But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

 

[A Devil's Advocate]

I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.

We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.

Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.

Good day to you Neostarwcc

Regarding your emphasis of feeling like you're not doing what God wants you to be doing, is it possible you feel that way because that's what you keep thinking? If you often think about sad things, you find yourself often feeling sad. If you often think about the things that upset you, you often find yourself feeling upset. If you watch a horror flick, even though it's not real, your emotions don't know that. They are simply responding to the thoughts in your mind. So, if you're currently thinking you're not doing what God wants you to be doing, does it not make sense this is how you're going to feel?
Jesus said, "For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." We are called first to believe. Then through belief we are told to love God and to love our neighbour. To love God is to place him at the centre of our life. To love our neighbour is to treat them how we want to be treated. It seems to me from what I read here you are likely doing just fine in these regards.

Just remember, we are not called to walk by feelings, but by faith. And, like you said, I also have no doubt you're rock hard faith will easily weather this too.

 

[Solo81]

From John Wooly's book "I am with you".

"Conflict and effort only mean that there is life within. My Spirit taking you forward. Seeking to follow My commands, you are at the place on the road that I wish you to be; this represents real progress, no matter what you, or others may judge.

It is part of evil's strategy to induce discouragement, seeing in your failures a falling back in your spiritual life, blinded to your victories achieved with Me. Is your confidence still in Me? Then be equally sure that these are times of great gain.

My child, doubt of your progress is doubt of Me. Even a little progress shows My purposes being fulfilled. You are learning life's lessons and finding that, with Me, it is a winning struggle. You will enjoy a new quality of life as you believe in all that I have done in you. All that you need for a new life is already yours."

Not by strength, nor by power, but by My Spirit - Zechariah 4:6

 

[Rsdar]

I once read a book that it's theme stuck with me. We all go through periods of consolation and periods off desolation. Don't think that you're alone. When in the period of desolation look back at those periods of consolation and remind yourself that He is at your right hand in both. Be in Scripture and pray even when you don't feel like doing it. Don't worry about what to pray just pray what you've shared here with us. I've been right where you are. Peace of Christ comfort and keep you.

 

[Paul4JC]

Nourish yourself in the Lord Jesus Christ. "All other ground is sinking sand." Jesus plus never works.

I would not recommend a book. Meditate on a gospel and the person of the Lord Jesus for a few days. I have not found a Christian to this day who had their act altogether and I sure don't. We, like the disciples of Christ and most biblical people, have our ups and downs. Remember even the great prophet Elijah wanted to give up? So you have something in common. God saw him through and will see you through too. Peace to you.

 

[bèlla]

You keep returning to this point for a reason. You need something to do.

Industry would help your psyche. Your wife is gone all day. You aren't at church as much as you'd like. And posting on CF isn't enough. You're too idle.

You need something to do. Something that uses the gifts and talents God bestowed. You like writing so create a website. You have the skills. Start a podcast. Post once a week or do it on YouTube. You enjoy talking about God so start with that.

You've mentioned how you handle your faith in light of your struggles. You've shared about your disability. Hello. Do you think you're alone? Maybe your words could comfort someone else with similar struggles or other challenges that needs an encouraging word. A me too I've been there.

On the spiritual side look up acedia. Psalm 91 addresses it. The counter to apathy is action. You counter heaviness with joy which you can cultivate through worship.

~bella

 

[BibleLinguist]

I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.

One's prayer life will soon cease if one is not reading the Bible. The Bible is how God speaks to us, and prayer is how we speak to Him. A one-sided conversation soon ends if there is no feedback, right?

An excellent book that I recommend which will help you to restore your relationship with Christ is called "Steps to Christ"--available as a free PDF. Its chapters are nicely organized by topics like confession, repentance, the test of discipleship, God's love for man, consecration, etc. I have many times found my hope renewed in reading this book when it seemed I had no hope left. The book quotes extensively from the Bible, and draws one's mind to God's actual words. It's almost like God is speaking directly to the soul words of comfort, hope, and assurance.

May you find the blessing you seek.

 

[returntosender]

I wonder if most of us do?

 

[bèlla]

I wonder if most of us do?

No. Defeat can be a symptom of fatigue, depression, or grief when hurting. Prayer is the first response.

Fatigue will be accompanied by feelings of tiredness, weariness and laziness which can lead to defeat with continuance. Pray against the spirit of fatigue to combat it.

Grief will be accompanied by sorrow, heartache, heartbreak, crying, sadness and cruelty. Pray against the spirit of grief to thwart it.

Heaviness is accompanied by gloom, burden and disgust. It's usually a precursor to depression. Pray against the spirit heaviness at the first inkling.

Depression is accompanied by despair, despondency, discouragement, defeatism, dejection, hopelessness, suicide, death, insomnia, and morbidity. The list is lengthy because they've languished in this condition too long and the symptoms worsen.

We must be proactive when we notice patterns in our mental or emotional state. Don't allow it to go on. That includes those diagnosed with mental illness. They should pray against the symptoms and the spirit of infirmity.

If depression has taken hold fasting is the best recourse with targeted prayers against the symptoms as noted above. It should be done over a period of time if multiple days aren't possible. For example, once a week for 12 weeks.

We can minimize reoccurrence by adopting a fasting routine (I do it once a week) and proactively praying against our struggles (defensive prayer) and making the appropriate requests in their place (offensive prayer).

For instance, if you struggle with your weight you'd pray against the spirit of infirmity and all weight related conditions (defensive prayer) and request healing and restoration in those areas in addition to the things you're unable to do because of your health (offensive prayer).

~bella

 

[Neostarwcc]

You keep returning to this point for a reason. You need something to do.

Industry would help your psyche. Your wife is gone all day. You aren't at church as much as you'd like. And posting on CF isn't enough. You're too idle.

You need something to do. Something that uses the gifts and talents God bestowed. You like writing so create a website. You have the skills. Start a podcast. Post once a week or do it on YouTube. You enjoy talking about God so start with that.

You've mentioned how you handle your faith in light of your struggles. You've shared about your disability. Hello. Do you think you're alone? Maybe your words could comfort someone else with similar struggles or other challenges that needs an encouraging word. A me too I've been there.

On the spiritual side look up acedia. Psalm 91 addresses it. The counter to apathy is action. You counter heaviness with joy which you can cultivate through worship.

~bella

Thank you you're absolutely right. I'll try to think of something that I can do rather than just continue to doing nothing. Even posting on CF I don't do as much if anymore like I used to. It's no wonder I'm depressed especially when I'm manic. And no it's not that I share my disability with everybody because i think i'm the only one with a disability. There are tons of schizophrenic people out there. It's more so that they'll understand what's going on because many people on CF probably don't know me or my wife who used to post here like 10 years ago. You would be an exception because you've been posting here for as long as I have and remember all of the posts that i've made about this issue but many people don't know.

But you're absolutely 100% right, my wife started working and contributing to the household so I should be actively considering doing something with my life too. I actually wanted for a long time to go to school to become a Pastor because I enjoy sharing the word of God with others. Maybe I'll go for a masters of divinity. I know my church would love to help and support me with that. I mostly never finished or started school because of my age I'm going to be 38 soon so that's kind of late to be starting school. But, working in computers or working in religion is all that I've really wanted to do with my life.

 

[bèlla]

Thank you you're absolutely right. I'll try to think of something that I can do rather than just continue to doing nothing. Even posting on CF I don't do as much if anymore like I used to. It's no wonder I'm depressed especially when I'm manic.

Now that you know the culprit you can address it strategically. Play Soakstream in your environment. If it won't disturb your sleep you'll notice a difference. It bathes you in the word while you rest and the spirit is calmed. You can play it during the day in the background for the same effect.

And no it's not that I share my disability with everybody because i think i'm the only one with a disability. There are tons of schizophrenic people out there. It's more so that they'll understand what's going on because many people on CF probably don't know me or my wife who used to post here like 10 years ago. You would be an exception because you've been posting here for as long as I have and remember all of the posts that i've made about this issue but many people don't know.

I haven't been here that long. Only a few years. I don't know your wife but I've seen your posts and noticed your restlessness. It's been quite a journey but I think you're moving towards the other side. There's a lot of unknowns about the condition and perhaps the Lord has work in mind. It isn't uncommon. He usually raises someone up with a similar struggle to minister to those in need.

But you're absolutely 100% right, my wife started working and contributing to the household so I should be actively considering doing something with my life too. I actually wanted for a long time to go to school to become a Pastor because I enjoy sharing the word of God with others. Maybe I'll go for a masters of divinity. I know my church would love to help and support me with that. I mostly never finished or started school because of my age I'm going to be 38 soon so that's kind of late to be starting school. But, working in computers or working in religion is all that I've really wanted to do with my life.

38 isn't old. Don't be hindered by your age. All that matters is your commitment. Ask Him for your Kingdom assignment and tell Him you're committed to its fulfillment. Dig in the word while you wait and sharpen your prayer muscles.

If He wants you to go to school He'll open the door. Pray for mercy and healing in relation to your health so you're not hindered. Tell Him you want to fulfill your mission. The more you hunger to do so the larger your prayers become. You get bolder and more confident.

Don't be surprised by surprises. He may take you in a different direction. But it will utilize your gifts and talents and the desires of your heart in ways you wouldn't expect. Keep an open mind and enjoy the journey. It's marvelous.

~bella

 

[eleos1954]

I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.

We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.

Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.

We pursue to be Christ like ... it's a daily battle because we are so fallen ... gets frustrating some times ... even so we are not to give up on it.

I look forward to His return and He ends this worldly mess ... so I rest in that.

 

[Curiousmind]

I told my Elder the other day that I felt like giving up. Giving up on holiness, on my Christian walk, and on winning the race. I can't help it, I just can't. I can't help but feel like I'm not living the life that Jesus wants me to live. Of course, from a Calvinist position this is completely incompatible with the Bible that teaches us that God leads us throughout iur lives. However it FEELS like I'm not doing what God wants me to be doing. Our Pastor recommended a book to us that he's going to give to us when we get to church on Sunday morning that I'm looking forward to read but I just feel like, everything is so distant right now.

We haven't been able to attend Church ever since my wife got her job, I haven't been praying as often as I probably should, I don't love God as much as I should because if I did I'd never sin against him ever again, and I only really read the Bible when I feel like it which is maybe once a month tops.

Don't get me wrong, I do have a rock hard faith that has whethered every storm and it will weather this one as well proving, that God keeps those who are meant to be saved, saved. My issue isn't salvation it's living the Christian life as I should be. It's that I desire and want to live a Godly life and I don't want to live my life the way I want, I want to live my life the way God wants. And honestly, this is a good thing so idk why I'm depressed and why I'm feeling this way. Can anybody give me any advice regarding this? Because, I haven't grown as a Christian in quite some time. In fact, I'm slowly going away from Christianity and I definitely don't want that.

Regarding depression, make sure it isn't something medical. I know a guy who suffers from depression, it is a medical condition, so he visits the psychiatric and doctor for this.

 

[BibleLinguist]

Regarding depression, make sure it isn't something medical. I know a guy who suffers from depression, it is a medical condition, so he visits the psychiatric and doctor for this.

I used to suffer a lot with depression. Maybe I still do sometimes. For me, the following things really helped (not necessarily in order of importance):

1) Adequate sunshine
2) Adequate sleep, esp. before midnight
3) Vitamin B12
4) Olive oil
5) Exercise / getting outdoors
6) Doing things to help others

Believe it or not, for some people, feeling depressed can be a side effect of an allergy (this was not my case, though), and there are many drugs which can cause depression. Anything that overstimulates the nervous system can lead to depression, ranging from overwork/overexercise to addictions. It is important to eliminate potential contributing factors in addition to adding helpful practices. The bottom line is: depression can be defeated.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Now that you know the culprit you can address it strategically. Play Soakstream in your environment. If it won't disturb your sleep you'll notice a difference. It bathes you in the word while you rest and the spirit is calmed. You can play it during the day in the background for the same effect.



I haven't been here that long. Only a few years. I don't know your wife but I've seen your posts and noticed your restlessness. It's been quite a journey but I think you're moving towards the other side. There's a lot of unknowns about the condition and perhaps the Lord has work in mind. It isn't uncommon. He usually raises someone up with a similar struggle to minister to those in need.



38 isn't old. Don't be hindered by your age. All that matters is your commitment. Ask Him for your Kingdom assignment and tell Him you're committed to its fulfillment. Dig in the word while you wait and sharpen your prayer muscles.

If He wants you to go to school He'll open the door. Pray for mercy and healing in relation to your health so you're not hindered. Tell Him you want to fulfill your mission. The more you hunger to do so the larger your prayers become. You get bolder and more confident.

Don't be surprised by surprises. He may take you in a different direction. But it will utilize your gifts and talents and the desires of your heart in ways you wouldn't expect. Keep an open mind and enjoy the journey. It's marvelous.

~bella

Oh I thought I remembered you from the mid 2010s when my wife and I used to post here all the time. I didn't check your profile to see when you joined the site. You're right, 38 isn't old but it's at the very most a life half lived and i might be surprised with how long i live but i honestly cant see me living past 65 years old.

Our Elder has been in the Presybeterian Church for several decades and started on his degree when he was 18. I think he met his wife when he was in school. I'm totally different. I flunked out of college several times since I graduated high school. Spent thousands trying to get an education in Computer Science and it's never worked out. I might try harder in school if i went for Theology or to become a Pastor. But, with my mental illness idk of being a pastor is right for me either. We will have to see. Anyway, I'll do something. I'm driving myself bonkers here lol.

 

[returntosender]

What about this. It is constantly being advertised on my phone. The only thing i question about it is the people they use to sell it. I believe they used Oprah's name also

KELLY CLARKSON AMAZED THE SET! SHE HAS AMAZINGLY LOST 47 POUNDS!