Is it okay to date another Christian whose been divorced?

[I'm_Sorry]

So, she didn't leave you for another man. She left you, and you fornicated immediately and continuously with your "partner" until she died?

Yes you can see it that way, much more love involved.

 

[PeterDona]

Wrong. It depends on guilt. If one party is guilty of adultery (it has to be a sexual sin) and the divorce is due to that sexual sin, then the innocent party is free to remarry. Why? Because the guilty party is dead spiritually speaking in God's eyes, leaving the innocent a widow/widower, free of the covenant.

You are wrong to say that I am wrong
Marriage is for all people in the world, it was instituted before any old or new covenant, therefore you cannot bring in the concept of being spiritually dead, because that the law of marriage apply to all people of the earth, also the unregenerate people.

Besides, it is physical death and not spiritual death that terminates the marriage.

 

[BukiRob]

I had briefly thought this was also talking exclusively about lying about one's virginity based on the fact that word "forncation" was used, too. For we see fornication is primarily used to refer to sex outside of marriage (Which is true). What changed my mind on the extended mean of "fornication" are three things. First, how does this law of exception on lying about virginity apply in a world like today? How often would this case come up? Not very often. But lets not let looking at logic alone to make our case here (Which then leads me into my other two points). Two, the word "fornication" is used as in reference to unfaithfulness in a marriage covenant with Israel in Ezekiel 16:26. It is claried in verse 8, God says to Israel,

"...Behold, thy time was the time of love; and I spread my skirt over thee, and covered thy nakedness: yea, I sware unto thee, and entered into a covenant with thee, saith the Lord GOD, and thou becamest mine." (Ezekiel 16:8).​

26 "Thou hast also committed fornication with the Egyptians thy neighbours, great of flesh; and hast increased thy whoredoms, to provoke me to anger.
27 Behold, therefore I have stretched out my hand over thee, and have diminished thine ordinary food, and delivered thee unto the will of them that hate thee, the daughters of the Philistines, which are ashamed of thy lewd way.
28 Thou hast played the harlot also with the Assyrians, because thou wast unsatiable; yea, thou hast played the harlot with them, and yet couldest not be satisfied.
29 Thou hast moreover multiplied thy fornication in the land of Canaan unto Chaldea; and yet thou wast not satisfied herewith."
(Ezekiel 16:26-29).[/INDENT]

Three, in Hosea 2, Hosea had told Gomer's family that he was no longer his wife. No doubt Hosea divorced Gomer because of her sexual misconduct with many men when they were married. Important Note: Many believe God told Hosea to marry a prostitute to begin with. This is wrong and it is not what the beginning of Hosea 1 says. Hosea married a wife of whoredoms (idolatry). Meaning, Hosea married a wife of a people of idolatry and he did not marry a harlot to begin with. She later become a harlot or prostitute, but he divorced her and the later bought her out of the sex slave trade (back in those days) and he became her loving friend and servant....

Nope. Fornication occurs between UNMARRIED people.

You will not find a single instance where in LITERAL translations the word fornication is used there. Furthermore if you look at the Orthodox translation the word used as harlot or fornication is Zonah which does NOT mean harlot but rather a woman who has engaged in one of the prohibited sexual practices (usually of a closer than allowed relative)

The type of woman Hosea was to marry: And Hashem said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee an eshet zenunim (wife of whoredoms) and yeladim of zenunim; for ha'aretz hath committed great whoredom, by departing from Hashem.

She is NOT called Zonah they are 2 very different things.

 

[I'm_Sorry]

A person's first legal marriage by the state or their country is lawful and considered a real marriage to God despite previous relationships. Can God forgive us of our sins? Yes, but I think that we also have to not only confess our sins but we have to forsake those sins, too. Granted, a person can be saved by confessing their sins or by accepting Christ before they shortly die. I just do not see how your second marriage lines up with the words of Jesus. I know you deeply loved each other, but our love for one another should never be above the Word of God.


...

I understand, it was an attempt to patch my deep pain instead of relying solely on God as I'm doing now since my partner died.

And being a christian I felt deep empathy for the spiritual state my new partner was in when we met also sensing a declining physical state (her lungs), I'm grateful God saved her 1 year prior to her death!

 

[PeterDona]

He is doing this now, it gets even better the closer we draw near and stay.

May I ask a question being celibate?

When was the last time you succumbed to temptation of the flesh to sexual release? I'm 32 y/o :O celibacy is for many years God willing a long life!

What way out has God provided you during the worst of temptation.

To be honest, I still struggle with involuntary release in my sleep. But voluntary masturbation, that is really far from me. I would say, 3 years. I believe that Jesus speaks against masturbation when he talks about your right hand bringing you to a fall. It would make pretty good sense in the context.

 

[I'm_Sorry]

To be honest, I still struggle with involuntary release in my sleep. But voluntary masturbation, that is really far from me. I would say, 3 years. I believe that Jesus speaks against masturbation when he talks about your right hand bringing you to a fall. It would make pretty good sense in the context.

Praise God may he give you strength unto death.

You do this for the sake of the kingdom as said in Matthew after lust of the eye

 

[1stcenturylady]

So, she didn't leave you for another man. She left you, and you fornicated immediately and continuously with your "partner" until she died?

.

 

[BukiRob]

Wrong. It depends on guilt. If one party is guilty of adultery (it has to be a sexual sin) and the divorce is due to that sexual sin, then the innocent party is free to remarry. Why? Because the guilty party is dead spiritually speaking in God's eyes, leaving the innocent a widow/widower, free of the covenant.

Sorry but that is error. HaShem gave Israel her divorce decree. It was not until a PHYSICAL DEATH occured that Israel could become ELIGIBLE to remarry. If HaShem had brought Israel back and allowed her to be presented as a bride to Yeshua he would be allowing Yeshua to partake in Adultery....

Yeshua's death FREED Israel and HaShem to pursue her without it bean an adulterous relationship.

The issue for humans is, is being married a second time perpetual adultery and my opinion is NO.

 

[Biblewriter]

Okay so you want to be hyper literal fine. What makes a marriage in G-d's eyes?

The act of physical union. That means that the first woman you had sex with happens to be your current wife then you are in an adulterous relationship with your current wife. If your wife had premarital sex with any other man she is an adulterous woman and since you married her you are STILL engaging in adultery.

CONTEXT PEOPLE!

Jesus told the woman at the well that she had had six husbands, that the one she now had was not her husband. So He recognized all her actual marriages (God had not yet given the law we are not discussing.) But He did not recognize "shacking up." So your definition of marriage is flawed. But the moral life you are speaking of is unacceptable n anyone professing the name of Christ.

 

[1stcenturylady]

Yes I committed that 2 months after she left me and said she wants nothing to do with me going forward.

So, she didn't leave you for another man. She left you, and you fornicated immediately and continuously with your "partner" until she died? If she didn't leave you for another man, you were still married in God's eyes when you started your fornication relationship. If this is the case, her subsequent remarriage is legal.

The problem in repenting now is that your partner is dead. You loved her more than God for as long as she lived. It is more convenient to repent now, as part of repentance is turning away from the object of your sin.

If I were you, I would pray for God to create a new heart in you. One that wants to do God's will always for the rest of your life. He will do that if you ask with an honest heart. But if you keep playing games with God, He always wins, and you will lose.

 

[Biblewriter]

Don't forget, Bathsheba was a widow, not a divorced woman. So apples and oranges. David repented about the death after Nathan spoke to him and opened his eyes to his sin. God's punishment was taking David's son. That was Old Testament, and God deals with us differently now in the New Covenant.

So, if he bothered to murder her husband first, that made it all right?

 

[Bible Highlighter]

These are just a few to show how God sees adultery and abominations. This is why sexual sin is spoken of so much. It is not so much of a covenant being broken and freeing two people, as to WHY a covenant is broken, and the vengeance of the Lord on the guilty party. And I'm not talking about BEFORE Christ, as ALL SINS are wiped clean at that point, but WILLFUL sins after Christ is considered trampling on the Spirit of Grace. Grace is not a license to sin.

Leviticus 20:10 ‘The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death."

Leviticus 20:13 "If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them.

Deuteronomy 24:1-“When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, 2 when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3 if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, 4 then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.

Deuteronomy 22:13 “If any man takes a wife, and goes in to her, and detests her, 14 and charges her with shameful conduct, and brings a bad name on her, and says, ‘I took this woman, and when I came to her I found she was not a virgin,’ 15 then the father and mother of the young woman shall take and bring out the evidence of the young woman’s virginity to the elders of the city at the gate. 16 And the young woman’s father shall say to the elders, ‘I gave my daughter to this man as wife, and he detests her. 17 Now he has charged her with shameful conduct, saying, “I found your daughter was not a virgin,” and yet these are the evidences of my daughter’s virginity.’ And they shall spread the cloth before the elders of the city. 18 Then the elders of that city shall take that man and punish him; 19 and they shall fine him one hundred shekels of silver and give them to the father of the young woman, because he has brought a bad name on a virgin of Israel. And she shall be his wife; he cannot divorce her all his days.

20 “But if the thing is true, and evidences of virginity are not found for the young woman, 21 then they shall bring out the young woman to the door of her father’s house, and the men of her city shall stone her to death with stones, because she has done a disgraceful thing in Israel, to play the harlot in her father’s house. So you shall put away the evil from among you."

First, I believe that a marriage between a man and woman is a beautiful thing. I believe it symbolizes the relationship God makes with His people (When they enter into a covenant relationship with Him when they accept Jesus as their Savior). I believe that if a believer commits serious sins (like murder, hate, adultery, theft, idolatry, and lying, etc.) they need to repent in order to remain forgiven. If they do not repent, I believe they can become prodigal (like the prodigal son) and be dead to the Father. For when the prodigal son came home to his father, his father said that he was dead and now he is alive again (two times). This parable was speaking in spiritual terms. Meaning, a person who once walked with God can become unsaved by refusing to repent of their sins. James 5:19-20 talks about how a faithful believer can restore another believer who has backslidden into a life of sin back to the faith to the saving of their soul. This means that sin (unfaithfulness) broke their marriage covenant with God. But that does not mean they cannot come back and be remarried to God again. This is one of the reasons why I believe a wife who was divorced by her husband because she cheated on him can remarry (just like the husband can).

Second, the Law (i.e. the Law of Moses) was great. I believe it taught us three important things. The Law teaches us that:

#1. God is a Rewarder to Those Who Do Good and Obey Him.
#2. God is a Punisher to Those who Do Evil and Disobey Him.
#3. The Law was a Shadow or Type Pointing us to Jesus Christ.​

But Paul says we are not under the Law anymore. Meaning, we are not under the Law of Moses or the Old Covenant Law anymore. We are under the Commands or Laws put forth by Jesus and His followers. For the Law brought death (like capital punishment) but Jesus brings truth, life, grace, and forgiveness.



....

 

[I'm_Sorry]

So, she didn't leave you for another man. She left you, and you fornicated immediately and continuously with your "partner" until she died? If she didn't leave you for another man, you were still married in God's eyes when you started your fornication relationship. If this is the case, her subsequent remarriage is legal.

That's good to know.

I've really failed and created a mess.

 

[Kenny'sID]

Because she is still bound to me in marriage.

But you didn't cause her to leave unless there is something more to it. If she left for no reason, it's on her.

I don't believe this, I believe God forgives.

Of course he does but do you really think God will forgive someone who makes a habit of say theft or even murder? The adultery is something that will be with you perpetually..an ongoing thing, but forgiveness requires repentance, or to stop what you are doing wrong.

Like the thief, if they stop, ask forgiveness they are fine, but if they don't repent/stop and make a habit of it, not fine....not fine at all

 

[BukiRob]

Jesus told the woman at the well that she had had six husbands, that the one she now had was not her husband. So He recognized all her actual marriages (God had not yet given the law we are not discussing.) But He did not recognize "shacking up." So your definition of marriage is flawed. But the moral life you are speaking of is unacceptable n anyone professing the name of Christ.

Yeshua NEVER gave new Torah.... NEVER, what he did was bring to light what the Torah actually meant both the letter of the law and as importantly the SPIRIT of the law.

In fact the only "new" commandment he gave was to the apostles which actually was not new at all....

 

[I'm_Sorry]

But you didn't cause her to leave unless there is something more to it. If she left for no reason, it's on her.

See:

So, she didn't leave you for another man. She left you, and you fornicated immediately and continuously with your "partner" until she died? If she didn't leave you for another man, you were still married in God's eyes when you started your fornication relationship. If this is the case, her subsequent remarriage is legal.

The problem in repenting now is that your partner is dead. You loved her more than God for as long as she lived. It is more convenient to repent now, as part of repentance is turning away from the object of your sin.

If I were you, I would pray for God to create a new heart in you. One that wants to do God's will always for the rest of your life. He will do that if you ask with an honest heart. But if you keep playing games with God, He always wins, and you will lose.

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Of course he does but do you really think God will forgive someone who makes a habit of say theft or even murder? The adultery is something that will be with you perpetually..an ongoing thing, but forgiveness requires repentance, or to stop what you are doing wrong.

Like the thief, if they stop, ask forgiveness they are fine, but if they don't repent/stop and make a habit of it, not fine....not fine at all

I'm the least in the kingdom at the moment, I have much to be chastised for.

 

[1stcenturylady]

So, if he bothered to murder her husband first, that made it all right?

The marriage, yes. But, he didn't get away scot free. God punished him. He took away his first child with Bathsheba, and he wasn't allowed to build God's temple.

God dealt with sin differently back then. Read Romans 3:25..."because in His forbearance God had passed over the sins that were previously committed, 26 to demonstrate at the present time His righteousness, that He might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus.

 

[1stcenturylady]

See:



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I'm the least in the kingdom at the moment, I have much to be chastised for.

What you need is to be filled with the Spirit. You've quenched Him for most of your life. So, of course you are weak.

 

[Bible Highlighter]

Nope. Fornication occurs between UNMARRIED people.

You will not find a single instance where in LITERAL translations the word fornication is used there. Furthermore if you look at the Orthodox translation the word used as harlot or fornication is Zonah which does NOT mean harlot but rather a woman who has engaged in one of the prohibited sexual practices (usually of a closer than allowed relative)

The type of woman Hosea was to marry: And Hashem said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee an eshet zenunim (wife of whoredoms) and yeladim of zenunim; for ha'aretz hath committed great whoredom, by departing from Hashem.

She is NOT called Zonah they are 2 very different things.

Let's agree to disagree then.

May God bless you.


...

 

[BukiRob]

But you didn't cause her to leave unless there is something more to it. If she left for no reason, it's on her.



Of course he does but do you really think God will forgive someone who makes a habit of say theft or even murder? The adultery is something that will be with you perpetually..an ongoing thing, but forgiveness requires repentance, or to stop what you are doing wrong.

Like the thief, if they stop, ask forgiveness they are fine, but if they don't repent/stop and make a habit of it, not fine....not fine at all

It is NOT perpetual!! Not only that Paul teaches that if you are a believer and your spouse is not a believer and she leaves you, you are no longer BOUND to that marriage.

1 Cor 7:15 Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace.

As you can CLEARLY see this topic is hardly cut and dry.

To argue that a person in a physically abusive marriage. 1/3rd of all women killed in the USA are murdered by their husbands. To suggest that a wife who escapes a dangerously abusive relationship can never remarry is abhorrent.