I haven't been on this thread for a while, I believe over a week. There are several reasons, one, and the most important one, is that I have other important things to do--in particular, my writing. I'm in the process of writing, now, three books (I just started a new one) and also have many other important priorities in my life.
Another is this: I told the story of my father's descent from the man who invented a product worth billions of dollars, who worked as a loyal employee for a company that did not show him the same loyalty in return, until, ultimately, he was depending on others to bring him his groceries, living in unhealthy conditions, and died after a bout of congestive heart failure, unable to afford even a $10 copay.
The response from Zongerfield? It's my father's fault because he didn't get a really good lawyer to defeat a major corporation, because, of course, that's very easy to do and anyone could do that. Blaming the victim.
I want to point to a couple previous posts.
It's all a matter of how you deal with your "disadvantage." Some use it as a means of inspiration, some never get over it and adopt a victim mentality. Life is hard and unfair. Thankfully we have God.
I'm feeling depressed and I can't find it in my heart right now to forgive anyone. I can't sleep. It's 2 am my time. I just had a drink for the first time in years.
I showed this thread to a friend and he made it very clear that I am being attacked, that I am being bullied, laughed at - which is maybe why I can't sleep. I don't know. I see darkness.
Take your own advice, Zongerfield. You accuse those who are
truly victimized of "adopting a victim mentality." You tell them, life is hard and unfair--get over it, don't adopt a victim mentality, there's always God. Then you blame the members of this board for your depression and alcohol addiction.
There is
nothing the people in this board can do to you to cause your depression or drinking. You are
always free to shut off your computer, go read a book, watch television, wash your hair, learn to juggle, do a newspaper crossword puzzle, or
anything other than get depressed and drink and come to this forum. (Perhaps even lay in bed and count sheep, if it's 2 AM?) And the notion that people who strongly disagree with your positions are "bullies" or "laughing at" you is utter nonsense.
There
is something that major corporations are doing that destroys people's lives. The
genuine hopelessness they instill, the
true inescapable situations they create, the poverty of hard working people, the
destruction of the lives of individuals and entire
communities for the sake of
addition, excessive profit, is something that would give reasonable people
a reason to get depressed, perhaps even reasons to seek escape in drugs or alcohol--things my father
never did.
You smugly lectured me about my father's failure to get a good lawyer (after all, they're everywhere available to poor people) after a major, multi-billion dollar corporation robbed him of his life's work left him penniless, begging for groceries, and unable to afford a doctor's copay when he was dying.
You did not see my father.
You do not know all that he did for that company, how hard he worked for so many years, and
you do not know what he went through after he was laid off, how hard he tried to put his life back together, and
you did not see my father with his
legs, swollen to two or three times their size and
blue, and
hear his voice when he explained to me that, he will just have to get better on his own because he can't afford a $10 copay. That
you could say
anything to blame the victim in this case, a situation which you know nothing about, boggles the mind.
Zongerfield,
one of these two people--you, or my father--is a genuine victim, a victim of an unfair system who had genuinely been harmed, so badly that the word "bullied" is unbelievably inadequate to describe what occurred. One of these two people truly did everything in his power to overcome, and was dragged down in a way that no human being ever should.
And
one of these two people--you, or my father--is using "victim mentality," is blaming others for his own faults and failures.
I will leave it to others to decide which is which.
No amount of blaming the victim or posturing in order to to hold onto a house-of-cards political position where corporations are wonderful and the poor are lazy, will change what happened to my father, what they did to him.
I will only add that depression is a medical condition. So is alcoholism. If you are truly depressed, there is help out there. There are Alcoholics Anonymous groups, and there are free clinics with psychiatrists available to help you with your depression... there is much more help available to you than there ever was for my father.
I wish you enlightenment, and I forgive, and will pray for you.
There
is light at the end of the tunnel. Stop trying to be right, and try to find the light instead.
I join others in leaving this thread, again.
Charlie