horrible blasphemous thoughts

[princesssss]

It may not have necessarily been an attack from Satan or any kind of demonic spirit, though, Princesssss (did I get the number of "s" right, there? ^-^ ). It may be that the only reason the blasphemous thoughts even started showing up in force in your mind is because your fear of the unforgivable sin - the rush of that fear in the moment upon watching whatever video this was you saw about the subject - causes your mind to latch onto such thoughts immediately. It's like if someone told you not to think of a pink elephant doing ballet or you will immediately "go to hell!" (I personally use this phrase in quotes because, well, that's another story.) Doesn't matter how fearful you may be of losing God's love or "going to hell" to suffer eternally, your mind WILL immediately think of a pink elephant in a ballerina outfit, whether you meant to or not. It isn't your fault. it's just how the human mind works. You have nothing to fear, my dear. I know it must sound really easy for me to say this to you right now, but, I promise that I suffered through a similar problem just like you seem to be now, once upon a time. I will pray that God has mercy upon you too as to take this fear and intrusive thoughts away from you soon, but no matter how long you may or may not be allowed by Him to suffer through it, you must not give up hope in His love and His mercy.




Reading the Bible may actually not be a good idea for you at this time, especially if in your emotional state (and I say that with all due respect, mind you) it is only potentially causing you to feel like you are rejected by God. It's going to take some time before you can see Scripture as a whole as being an invitation and exhortation by God to all again instead of a long letter of condemnation. Remember, Jesus Himself said He did come to earth to condemn but to save.

And may I suggest, that when God said that repetitive prayers are vain, that is again a matter of the heart. Is it your intention through repeatedly praying for His forgiveness and mercy to just look "good" before Him, to look devout and holy? It does not seem that way to me, but rather you are genuinely crying out for His mercy and wish for comfort from Him.

Thank you so much for your response, I saw your responses on numerous posts and you truly have a way with words. May I ask you how you overcame the intrusive thoughts or the guilt behind it? I feel like I'm forgiven but I don't know how to stop falling back into that pit of guilt. I just pray that God still loves me and has not marked me out in the Book of Life.

 

[SarahsKnight]

May I ask you how you overcame the intrusive thoughts or the guilt behind it? I feel like I'm forgiven but I don't know how to stop falling back into that pit of guilt.

Honestly, it is very hard to say when it finally came to an end. I do have a theory, though; it was about that time I was first introduced to the theology of conditional immortality in a very general, roundabout way. Someone on a small website somewhere wondered why - if we live forever in Heaven or Hell after earthly death - are there so many verses in the Bible depicting the fate of unbelievers ultimately as death, least of all Romans 6:23, if Hell is a place of living torture for the unsaved, immortal souls going on in some kind of physical or emotional pain forever because of the total, complete separation from God. I couldn't remember where this site was or if it had any other purpose other than the writer listing off these verses that spoke of death instead of "hell", but it did get me to thinking in my few precious moments of rest in between all of the emotional outbursts and times of great mental torment that I was suffering from at the time (and I had yet to determine that it was really just another form of obsessive-compulsive disorder).

Seeing God as One Who sees fit to destroy unbelievers at judgment rather than torture them forever made Him seem less "sadistic" in my eyes*, I suppose you could say, and in my mind it therefore became easier for me to rest in His love and mercy, rather than keep on worrying and wondering that He was out to get me, that my sickness from OCD at this time were God's way of telling me I had somehow done something to now make Him hate me and He was intent on condemning me now.

I guess to sum it up, the less I feared the bad thoughts being a sign of His condemnation of me, the less I feared that God is the kind of God Who is out to get you and keep you out of His grace, the further the bad thoughts could affect me badly, therefore the less frequent they came to mind, and therefore the less triggers I had to become depressed, anxious, and downright miserable. If ever a hell truly did exist, I have no problem saying that it was the eight months or so that I actively suffered from this OCD in 2012. It will forever be the greatest scar upon my past. Of course, Princesssss, all in all I believe it is ultimately up to God to end the period of suffering for you, and I pray that He will in time. JUST REMEMBER, however, that (God willing otherwise) if you must suffer for a while longer from the mental torment and the bad thoughts, it DOES NOT mean that you are truly against God or God is against you and seeks to condemn you (because in this kind of state it is easy to start believing things like that). But I do honestly believe that your problem is ultimately just a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder, not a spiritual attack where your salvation and status as a believer in Christ is at stake.

I hope I am making sense here. I tend to write rather lengthy sentences whenever I try to explain these things, for one.




* After beginning to heal from my OCD - at least to where I was no longer having tremendous bouts of anguished crying and screaming - towards the end 2012, @princesssss, I felt a calmness and soundness enough of mind to start pursuing study of the subject of conditional immortality (the stance that God literally destroys unbelievers in the lake of fire and only the saved will be given immortality as a gift through belief in Jesus Christ) versus the traditional view that everyone has an inherently immortal soul and therefore lives on forever in Heaven or Hell after earthly death. As you may have seen by now, I wholly believe that conditional immortality is the correct and Biblical stance, as there are just way too many verses in Scripture that clearly describe the ultimate fate of unbelievers as being death, the absence of life, everlasting destruction, being burned up and consumed by the fire, etc. as opposed to few verses that can at all support the traditional view. But that is another story; I just wanted to explain myself there what I meant by "conditional immortality" when I brought it up in the first paragraph, in case you had never heard the term before, seeing as how it is still a minority view among Christians.

 

[Mari17]

Thank you so much for your response, I saw your responses on numerous posts and you truly have a way with words. May I ask you how you overcame the intrusive thoughts or the guilt behind it? I feel like I'm forgiven but I don't know how to stop falling back into that pit of guilt. I just pray that God still loves me and has not marked me out in the Book of Life.

Princess, fear of committing the unpardonable sin and of not asking for salvation correctly are very very common obsessions among Christians with OCD. SarahsKnight is EXACTLY right with the whole pink elephant analogy. Those of us with OCD are preconditioned to want to be anxious, so when we come across something that our OCD thinks would be good anxiety-feeding material, it instantly latches on and it becomes very hard for us to let go. The key is to learn not to freak out about the thoughts, to recognize that that's the way our brain works, and to realize that the more afraid we are of getting "bad" thoughts, the more the OCD will send them (because it's just weird like that). I disagree that one has to not believe in hell in order to escape OCD. OCD is all about taking a normal, healthy concern and blowing it way out of proportion. It doesn't mean one avoids the things one is afraid of, but that one learns how to deal with a faulty brain wiring system by learning and applying mental strategies. For example, someone with a germ obsession does not avoid germs altogether, but learns to get to the point where they can operate as a "normal" person again, even around germs. I've had OCD since I was about eight years old and have had many different OCD themes, so feel free to talk anytime, or ask for resources or advice!

 

[princesssss]

Princess, fear of committing the unpardonable sin and of not asking for salvation correctly are very very common obsessions among Christians with OCD. SarahsKnight is EXACTLY right with the whole pink elephant analogy. Those of us with OCD are preconditioned to want to be anxious, so when we come across something that our OCD thinks would be good anxiety-feeding material, it instantly latches on and it becomes very hard for us to let go. The key is to learn not to freak out about the thoughts, to recognize that that's the way our brain works, and to realize that the more afraid we are of getting "bad" thoughts, the more the OCD will send them (because it's just weird like that). I disagree that one has to not believe in hell in order to escape OCD. OCD is all about taking a normal, healthy concern and blowing it way out of proportion. It doesn't mean one avoids the things one is afraid of, but that one learns how to deal with a faulty brain wiring system by learning and applying mental strategies. For example, someone with a germ obsession does not avoid germs altogether, but learns to get to the point where they can operate as a "normal" person again, even around germs. I've had OCD since I was about eight years old and have had many different OCD themes, so feel free to talk anytime, or ask for resources or advice!

thank you, I just fear that i'm not going to be forgiven. I never would've thought those things in the past but it's like the more i try not to think about them, the more i think about them. and i know it ties directly with what it says in the bible, blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. I feel like I'm losing hope of ever being forgiven

 

[Mari17]

thank you, I just fear that i'm not going to be forgiven. I never would've thought those things in the past but it's like the more i try not to think about them, the more i think about them. and i know it ties directly with what it says in the bible, blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. I feel like I'm losing hope of ever being forgiven

Don't be afraid. This is exactly the way OCD works. The more afraid you are of doing something, the more it makes you feel like you want to do it. Do you have any access to professional help for your OCD (medication, therapist)?

 

[HeDeliveredMe]

EVERYONE STRUGGLING WITH THIS ISSUE, Please please text me at 904-403-1908 ASAP. I dont care how old this thread gets, if you see this message and are struggling, text or call me. if i dont answer leave a message explaining why you are calling. I was the WORST of the Worst struggling with all this same stuff and He delivered me completely. Please reach out i would love to help each and every one of you.

 

[HeDeliveredMe]

I'm kinda experiencing the same thing that you are going through. I have horrible blasphemous thoughts that I don't want to think. I am really scared because I don't want to go to hell and I don't want to be punished. I also have horrible thoughts of hell most of the time i am always living in fear I'm so scared that I have committed blasphemy against the Holy Spirit because of these blasphemous thoughts that I don't want. I'm so scared because I don't want to be go to hell because of those thoughts someone please help me

Hey there, i would absolutely love to talk to you and help you, the Lord completely freed me of all of this and i would love to help you understand with scripture how you are NOT unforgivable and how to overcome this. anyone else who reads this and needs help PLEASE call or text me at 904 403 1908 and i will be glad to help you any way i can. if i dont answer please leave a message so i know to get back to you. blessings

 

[HeDeliveredMe]

thank you, I just fear that i'm not going to be forgiven. I never would've thought those things in the past but it's like the more i try not to think about them, the more i think about them. and i know it ties directly with what it says in the bible, blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. I feel like I'm losing hope of ever being forgiven

I am a young female who has overcome this by the LORD/Word! OCD, intrusive thoughts, fear of blasphemy, you name it, it was bad. But i am completely free and would love to help you by sharing His truth with you so you know from scripture how you are NOT unforgivable and get rid of these lies of the enemy that are trying to destroy you in falsehood. if you are able, please call or text me at 904 403 1908 anytime. Blessings

 

[Nicole Roberson]

Hi. I'm new here. Hopefully I'll get replies here soon. I just came across this website about a week ago. God definitely meant for me to find this, no doubt about that. That's why I decided to join this forum.

I've been going through the exact same thing as many of you since summer of 2018. When it started happening, I thought it was so bizarre. Hasn't stopped. It's been horrible. If any of you see this please pray for me. Since discovering this forum, it's the biggest relief, honestly a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing all these people going through the same thing, describing the EXACT same aspects to the situation. This just came all of the sudden. It was summer and I'd just finished my 2nd semester of college. I'm 19, going to turn 20 this year. One day a million of these horrible, blasphemous thoughts flood into my head at once and I'm horrified. The same thoughts come into my mind, over and over. Anything good and genuine I say about God and the Holy Spirit, the Devil attempts to twist around into something bad. So I've been trying to counteract these words with random words that aren't really words to kind of block what the Devil says, sort of as a "blah blah blah, I'm not listening to you Devil". Over the months I've noticed that new phrases will be introduced to my mind, and certain ones have stayed since the beginning. The most horrible thoughts...completely unspeakable. I’d be hearing things about the Mark of the Beast.

When I first heard them I was shocked, horrified, and I could feel this cold sensation rise in my stomach. I’d immediately shout “NO!” at these thoughts. Just like many of you, they come and go. Some days aren't too bad, and there was even one day where these thoughts barely came at all, which gave me some confidence. Then some days are just awful. I'll be calling out to God, begging him to do something about this. A couple times I even cried. I became worried about what my life will look like in the future with this large amount of stress, how it will affect my health. I wondered...when will this stop?

I'm mostly able to get sleep, but many times I've had trouble sleeping. There was even this one night that was the worst, and I found myself awake at 2am trying to deal with these thoughts, not able to go to sleep. The times that this affects me the most is when I’m waking up in the morning; and around 5:30 pm and into the night they get more intense and I start to feel extremely anxious and upset. This doesn't hugely interfere with me in my college classes & work/studying, thank God. But sometimes in class, the thoughts will come. When I'm trying to read a book, they'll try to come too, but thankfully I'm able to become absorbed in the reading and tune it out.

I know things could be worse, but this has definitely changed my life. My mom had told me about the unforgivable sin once, and I definitely took this seriously, vowing never to do this, because going to Heaven, being with God has meant everything to me since I was a little girl. I've grown up a Christian. I've been going to the same Church since I was a literally a baby. I was baptized a few years ago, and so was my brother. But ironically enough, the same year that I'd learned about the unforgivable sin was the same year that this torment came onto me (yes, 2018). I've never told anyone about this, not until this forum, but I haven't told my mom yet. I'm preparing myself to. I know the Devil is purposely trying to keep me from telling her, but I know I shouldn’t be afraid to. I know she’ll understand.

I'm ashamed to say I've never really sat down and immersed myself in the Bible. My mom reads the Bible every day. By all means, it's not that I've ever been against reading the Bible or anything. I've just never taken the time to do it. But I'm going to start now. Because that's something I realize I should've been doing long ago. Also, I've never really had a conversation with the Holy Spirit before until this started happening. Of course I don't deny Him, I just didn't know when I would be talking to Him, and what about. But since this situation, I've started talking to Him, telling Him how much He means to me, and asking Him to give me strength to fight this. I’ve asked to receive Him, for Him to fill my mind with His words, His presence. I’ve declared to Him that I want to be closer to Him, have a strong relationship with Him. I've been reading everyone's stories and taking their advice, which has honestly made me feel so much better. I'm learning how to stand up to the Devil. I'm starting to learn what I can do. Again, I'm so grateful to God for this website.

I'd been doing research about what to do about this ordeal and that's how I found this forum. Since this has been happening, I started feeling strangely uncomfortable whenever I'd hear something or see something related to Christ, Christianity, and I'd never felt this way before. I love watching these Youtube videos of this channel called a A Call For an Uprising, because he exposes the truth about our world, the New World Order, Illuminati, subliminal messages in pop culture, the dumbing down of society, etc. I love his videos because he helps everyone open their minds. But since this ordeal I weirdly started avoiding listening to his videos. I know I shouldn't, and now I realize that's exactly what the devil wants. I'd been afraid to do research for some time because I now realize that the Devil has been trying to make me feel guilty, trying to make me think that I've committed the unforgivable sin, that I'm the one thinking all these thoughts. But I know it's not me, because I would never do this.

I've started to say to the Devil, "No Devil, I will not say your lies nor will I believe your lies". And this does work to some degree. I often have to say it multiple times for him to go away. But every time he comes back, I just keep saying this to him, and addition telling him that I am a child of God. I've been rebuking the Devil, telling him that I bring God against him, to begone in Jesus name. I speak to God everyday, and I speak to the Holy Spirit all the time, praying for help, advice, and peace & comfort. Confidence. I believe this will get better in time, even if it never goes away completely.

I won't let this take over me and I'm determined to fight. Since discovering this website and learning that learning about the truth, and that I am saved, things have gotten so much better, and I'm starting to see an improvement with this ordeal. Now I'm becoming comfortable again with Christianity, and I'll be watching A Call for An Uprising's videos again. I feel so much better sharing this on a forum, because honestly I just didn't know who to talk to. Sorry this post is so long.


Thank you all, God bless you all. Besides myself, I'll be praying for everyone.

 

[Pink Elephants]

Hi. I'm new here. Hopefully I'll get replies here soon. I just came across this website about a week ago. God definitely meant for me to find this, no doubt about that. That's why I decided to join this forum.

I've been going through the exact same thing as many of you since summer of 2018. When it started happening, I thought it was so bizarre. Hasn't stopped. It's been horrible. If any of you see this please pray for me. Since discovering this forum, it's the biggest relief, honestly a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing all these people going through the same thing, describing the EXACT same aspects to the situation. This just came all of the sudden. It was summer and I'd just finished my 2nd semester of college. I'm 19, going to turn 20 this year. One day a million of these horrible, blasphemous thoughts flood into my head at once and I'm horrified. The same thoughts come into my mind, over and over. Anything good and genuine I say about God and the Holy Spirit, the Devil attempts to twist around into something bad. So I've been trying to counteract these words with random words that aren't really words to kind of block what the Devil says, sort of as a "blah blah blah, I'm not listening to you Devil". Over the months I've noticed that new phrases will be introduced to my mind, and certain ones have stayed since the beginning. The most horrible thoughts...completely unspeakable. I’d be hearing things about the Mark of the Beast.

When I first heard them I was shocked, horrified, and I could feel this cold sensation rise in my stomach. I’d immediately shout “NO!” at these thoughts. Just like many of you, they come and go. Some days aren't too bad, and there was even one day where these thoughts barely came at all, which gave me some confidence. Then some days are just awful. I'll be calling out to God, begging him to do something about this. A couple times I even cried. I became worried about what my life will look like in the future with this large amount of stress, how it will affect my health. I wondered...when will this stop?

I'm mostly able to get sleep, but many times I've had trouble sleeping. There was even this one night that was the worst, and I found myself awake at 2am trying to deal with these thoughts, not able to go to sleep. The times that this affects me the most is when I’m waking up in the morning; and around 5:30 pm and into the night they get more intense and I start to feel extremely anxious and upset. This doesn't hugely interfere with me in my college classes & work/studying, thank God. But sometimes in class, the thoughts will come. When I'm trying to read a book, they'll try to come too, but thankfully I'm able to become absorbed in the reading and tune it out.

I know things could be worse, but this has definitely changed my life. My mom had told me about the unforgivable sin once, and I definitely took this seriously, vowing never to do this, because going to Heaven, being with God has meant everything to me since I was a little girl. I've grown up a Christian. I've been going to the same Church since I was a literally a baby. I was baptized a few years ago, and so was my brother. But ironically enough, the same year that I'd learned about the unforgivable sin was the same year that this torment came onto me (yes, 2018). I've never told anyone about this, not until this forum, but I haven't told my mom yet. I'm preparing myself to. I know the Devil is purposely trying to keep me from telling her, but I know I shouldn’t be afraid to. I know she’ll understand.

I'm ashamed to say I've never really sat down and immersed myself in the Bible. My mom reads the Bible every day. By all means, it's not that I've ever been against reading the Bible or anything. I've just never taken the time to do it. But I'm going to start now. Because that's something I realize I should've been doing long ago. Also, I've never really had a conversation with the Holy Spirit before until this started happening. Of course I don't deny Him, I just didn't know when I would be talking to Him, and what about. But since this situation, I've started talking to Him, telling Him how much He means to me, and asking Him to give me strength to fight this. I’ve asked to receive Him, for Him to fill my mind with His words, His presence. I’ve declared to Him that I want to be closer to Him, have a strong relationship with Him. I've been reading everyone's stories and taking their advice, which has honestly made me feel so much better. I'm learning how to stand up to the Devil. I'm starting to learn what I can do. Again, I'm so grateful to God for this website.

I'd been doing research about what to do about this ordeal and that's how I found this forum. Since this has been happening, I started feeling strangely uncomfortable whenever I'd hear something or see something related to Christ, Christianity, and I'd never felt this way before. I love watching these Youtube videos of this channel called a A Call For an Uprising, because he exposes the truth about our world, the New World Order, Illuminati, subliminal messages in pop culture, the dumbing down of society, etc. I love his videos because he helps everyone open their minds. But since this ordeal I weirdly started avoiding listening to his videos. I know I shouldn't, and now I realize that's exactly what the devil wants. I'd been afraid to do research for some time because I now realize that the Devil has been trying to make me feel guilty, trying to make me think that I've committed the unforgivable sin, that I'm the one thinking all these thoughts. But I know it's not me, because I would never do this.

I've started to say to the Devil, "No Devil, I will not say your lies nor will I believe your lies". And this does work to some degree. I often have to say it multiple times for him to go away. But every time he comes back, I just keep saying this to him, and addition telling him that I am a child of God. I've been rebuking the Devil, telling him that I bring God against him, to begone in Jesus name. I speak to God everyday, and I speak to the Holy Spirit all the time, praying for help, advice, and peace & comfort. Confidence. I believe this will get better in time, even if it never goes away completely.

I won't let this take over me and I'm determined to fight. Since discovering this website and learning that learning about the truth, and that I am saved, things have gotten so much better, and I'm starting to see an improvement with this ordeal. Now I'm becoming comfortable again with Christianity, and I'll be watching A Call for An Uprising's videos again. I feel so much better sharing this on a forum, because honestly I just didn't know who to talk to. Sorry this post is so long.


Thank you all, God bless you all. Besides myself, I'll be praying for everyone.

 

[Pink Elephants]

Hey Nicole,
We are not responsible for unwanted thoughts that enter our mind. Now, we can willfully pursue impure thoughts, but that is not what we are talking about. These thoughts that we are having are UNWANTED! We don't desire them. We want them to go away. I was saved at 18 years of age. Shortly after my conversion, I began having horrible thoughts. I couldn't talk to anyone about them. They were unspeakable. My joy as a new believer was stolen. Life went on and my focus was off of Christ. Things calmed down. The thoughts stopped. Why wouldn't they? I was defeated and there was no need to torment me any longer. I was no longer a threat to the enemy. I remained a professing Christian, but was totally ineffective. Fast forward...I am now 65. Back in December I had a Christian friend who recommended I read a book, "Imagine Heaven," by John Burke, that set my heart on fire for God. I started praying with faith. I actually believed God was going to hear my prayers and answer. He did! These weren't selfish prayers. I was praying that God would use me to further His kingdom. I wanted opportunities to witness to others. I started seeing things begin to happen, and guess what? Those horrible, awful thoughts returned. It was, and is difficult. But, I've now had experience with the enemy. He has returned with the same tactics he used on me as an 18 year old. I am now convinced these thoughts are there to defeat us and tempt us to give up. Don't! Instead, look at them as a motivator to keep praising God and being eternally grateful for the work and sacrifice of our Lord Jesus who not only has saved us and keeps saving us, but will save us. These thoughts are not sin. We don't desire them or want them, but their only purpose is used in an attempt to defeat us in our desire to serve God. Stay focused on Christ. He's got it!

 

[Mari17]

Hi. I'm new here. Hopefully I'll get replies here soon. I just came across this website about a week ago. God definitely meant for me to find this, no doubt about that. That's why I decided to join this forum.

I've been going through the exact same thing as many of you since summer of 2018. When it started happening, I thought it was so bizarre. Hasn't stopped. It's been horrible. If any of you see this please pray for me. Since discovering this forum, it's the biggest relief, honestly a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing all these people going through the same thing, describing the EXACT same aspects to the situation. This just came all of the sudden. It was summer and I'd just finished my 2nd semester of college. I'm 19, going to turn 20 this year. One day a million of these horrible, blasphemous thoughts flood into my head at once and I'm horrified. The same thoughts come into my mind, over and over. Anything good and genuine I say about God and the Holy Spirit, the Devil attempts to twist around into something bad. So I've been trying to counteract these words with random words that aren't really words to kind of block what the Devil says, sort of as a "blah blah blah, I'm not listening to you Devil". Over the months I've noticed that new phrases will be introduced to my mind, and certain ones have stayed since the beginning. The most horrible thoughts...completely unspeakable. I’d be hearing things about the Mark of the Beast.

When I first heard them I was shocked, horrified, and I could feel this cold sensation rise in my stomach. I’d immediately shout “NO!” at these thoughts. Just like many of you, they come and go. Some days aren't too bad, and there was even one day where these thoughts barely came at all, which gave me some confidence. Then some days are just awful. I'll be calling out to God, begging him to do something about this. A couple times I even cried. I became worried about what my life will look like in the future with this large amount of stress, how it will affect my health. I wondered...when will this stop?

I'm mostly able to get sleep, but many times I've had trouble sleeping. There was even this one night that was the worst, and I found myself awake at 2am trying to deal with these thoughts, not able to go to sleep. The times that this affects me the most is when I’m waking up in the morning; and around 5:30 pm and into the night they get more intense and I start to feel extremely anxious and upset. This doesn't hugely interfere with me in my college classes & work/studying, thank God. But sometimes in class, the thoughts will come. When I'm trying to read a book, they'll try to come too, but thankfully I'm able to become absorbed in the reading and tune it out.

I know things could be worse, but this has definitely changed my life. My mom had told me about the unforgivable sin once, and I definitely took this seriously, vowing never to do this, because going to Heaven, being with God has meant everything to me since I was a little girl. I've grown up a Christian. I've been going to the same Church since I was a literally a baby. I was baptized a few years ago, and so was my brother. But ironically enough, the same year that I'd learned about the unforgivable sin was the same year that this torment came onto me (yes, 2018). I've never told anyone about this, not until this forum, but I haven't told my mom yet. I'm preparing myself to. I know the Devil is purposely trying to keep me from telling her, but I know I shouldn’t be afraid to. I know she’ll understand.

I'm ashamed to say I've never really sat down and immersed myself in the Bible. My mom reads the Bible every day. By all means, it's not that I've ever been against reading the Bible or anything. I've just never taken the time to do it. But I'm going to start now. Because that's something I realize I should've been doing long ago. Also, I've never really had a conversation with the Holy Spirit before until this started happening. Of course I don't deny Him, I just didn't know when I would be talking to Him, and what about. But since this situation, I've started talking to Him, telling Him how much He means to me, and asking Him to give me strength to fight this. I’ve asked to receive Him, for Him to fill my mind with His words, His presence. I’ve declared to Him that I want to be closer to Him, have a strong relationship with Him. I've been reading everyone's stories and taking their advice, which has honestly made me feel so much better. I'm learning how to stand up to the Devil. I'm starting to learn what I can do. Again, I'm so grateful to God for this website.

I'd been doing research about what to do about this ordeal and that's how I found this forum. Since this has been happening, I started feeling strangely uncomfortable whenever I'd hear something or see something related to Christ, Christianity, and I'd never felt this way before. I love watching these Youtube videos of this channel called a A Call For an Uprising, because he exposes the truth about our world, the New World Order, Illuminati, subliminal messages in pop culture, the dumbing down of society, etc. I love his videos because he helps everyone open their minds. But since this ordeal I weirdly started avoiding listening to his videos. I know I shouldn't, and now I realize that's exactly what the devil wants. I'd been afraid to do research for some time because I now realize that the Devil has been trying to make me feel guilty, trying to make me think that I've committed the unforgivable sin, that I'm the one thinking all these thoughts. But I know it's not me, because I would never do this.

I've started to say to the Devil, "No Devil, I will not say your lies nor will I believe your lies". And this does work to some degree. I often have to say it multiple times for him to go away. But every time he comes back, I just keep saying this to him, and addition telling him that I am a child of God. I've been rebuking the Devil, telling him that I bring God against him, to begone in Jesus name. I speak to God everyday, and I speak to the Holy Spirit all the time, praying for help, advice, and peace & comfort. Confidence. I believe this will get better in time, even if it never goes away completely.

I won't let this take over me and I'm determined to fight. Since discovering this website and learning that learning about the truth, and that I am saved, things have gotten so much better, and I'm starting to see an improvement with this ordeal. Now I'm becoming comfortable again with Christianity, and I'll be watching A Call for An Uprising's videos again. I feel so much better sharing this on a forum, because honestly I just didn't know who to talk to. Sorry this post is so long.


Thank you all, God bless you all. Besides myself, I'll be praying for everyone.

Pink Elephants is right. In order to deal with the thoughts effectively, we have to learn how to respond to them - which is to ignore them and treat them as meaningless rather than freak out and try frantically to get rid of them. OCD/scrupulosity has chemical/biological roots; we have a predisposition to anxiety, and that anxiety is always looking for something to sink its teeth into. So sometimes, when we get weird or scary or random thoughts, instead of being able to properly filter them out like "normal" people do, we latch right on, starting to hyper-analyze them and feel like they're a real issue. Really, it's just our OCD brains trying to get us freaked out about something. I've had OCD for most of my life, and a lot of it has had religious themes. So, I'd be happy to pass on links to some of the resources that have helped me, or to answer any questions or just talk about how to deal with this crazy disorder!

 

[Pink Elephants]

Pink Elephants is right. In order to deal with the thoughts effectively, we have to learn how to respond to them - which is to ignore them and treat them as meaningless rather than freak out and try frantically to get rid of them. OCD/scrupulosity has chemical/biological roots; we have a predisposition to anxiety, and that anxiety is always looking for something to sink its teeth into. So sometimes, when we get weird or scary or random thoughts, instead of being able to properly filter them out like "normal" people do, we latch right on, starting to hyper-analyze them and feel like they're a real issue. Really, it's just our OCD brains trying to get us freaked out about something. I've had OCD for most of my life, and a lot of it has had religious themes. So, I'd be happy to pass on links to some of the resources that have helped me, or to answer any questions or just talk about how to deal with this crazy disorder!

 

[Pink Elephants]

Thanks so much for your response. It really is a strange disorder. It is nice to know we aren't alone. Otherwise, the hopelessness would be overwhelming.

 

[Mari17]

Thanks so much for your response. It really is a strange disorder. It is nice to know we aren't alone. Otherwise, the hopelessness would be overwhelming.

I'm part of a support group on Facebook that you might find helpful. It's called "Christianity and Anxiety Disorders." Feel free to join if you'd like!

 

[Joshua218]

Hi there.

Its so sad to see that so many people are going through the exact same thing. I have been experiencing the same for the last 7 years. I honestly can't remember when it all started because it has been so long that I have suffered with this. It hasn't stopped but my faith is really strong. Sometimes I wonder whether it will ever stop and even through this struggle I still go against the kingdom of darkness, in fact I have so much hatred for the devil that when I pray for people that are possessed and need deliverance I make sure that while casting that demon out the devil suffers. Jesus gave us so much of power in His name that sometimes we don't realize it. I have always suffered in church, my heart was always for Jesus. I have been called with an apostolic anointing in the kingdom of God and when I had a Prophet pray for me God spoke through him and said that the reason that I am suffering so much is for the anointing that I am carrying. Robbers don't break into empty houses. If you reading this and experiencing the same please understand that you are carrying something strong inside of you for the devil to attack you in such a way. I know how draining it is and how disgusting horrible those thoughts are. But hold on be strong, we will get through this. We will not allow the devil to have victory over us. The power of God is within our body, the devil may attack our flesh but our spirits are strong in Jesus. I pray the blood of Jesus over you. No weapon formed against you will prosper. Peace be with you.

 

[Mari17]

Hi there.

Its so sad to see that so many people are going through the exact same thing. I have been experiencing the same for the last 7 years. I honestly can't remember when it all started because it has been so long that I have suffered with this. It hasn't stopped but my faith is really strong. Sometimes I wonder whether it will ever stop and even through this struggle I still go against the kingdom of darkness, in fact I have so much hatred for the devil that when I pray for people that are possessed and need deliverance I make sure that while casting that demon out the devil suffers. Jesus gave us so much of power in His name that sometimes we don't realize it. I have always suffered in church, my heart was always for Jesus. I have been called with an apostolic anointing in the kingdom of God and when I had a Prophet pray for me God spoke through him and said that the reason that I am suffering so much is for the anointing that I am carrying. Robbers don't break into empty houses. If you reading this and experiencing the same please understand that you are carrying something strong inside of you for the devil to attack you in such a way. I know how draining it is and how disgusting horrible those thoughts are. But hold on be strong, we will get through this. We will not allow the devil to have victory over us. The power of God is within our body, the devil may attack our flesh but our spirits are strong in Jesus. I pray the blood of Jesus over you. No weapon formed against you will prosper. Peace be with you.

I'm glad that you have so much determination to stay strong. Do you have OCD/anxiety? I find that in most cases, OCD is the cause of a mental disorder, so there are specific strategies that we can use to help us deal with it. Have you been able to get any help for your struggles?

 

[Joshua218]

I'm glad that you have so much determination to stay strong. Do you have OCD/anxiety? I find that in most cases, OCD is the cause of a mental disorder, so there are specific strategies that we can use to help us deal with it. Have you been able to get any help for your struggles?

Hi there. I do not have anxiety or OCD or any type of mental disorder. I am in deliverance ministry an the devil isn't happy with that so it is his way to retaliate.

 

[Joshua218]

Hi. I'm new here. Hopefully I'll get replies here soon. I just came across this website about a week ago. God definitely meant for me to find this, no doubt about that. That's why I decided to join this forum.

I've been going through the exact same thing as many of you since summer of 2018. When it started happening, I thought it was so bizarre. Hasn't stopped. It's been horrible. If any of you see this please pray for me. Since discovering this forum, it's the biggest relief, honestly a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing all these people going through the same thing, describing the EXACT same aspects to the situation. This just came all of the sudden. It was summer and I'd just finished my 2nd semester of college. I'm 19, going to turn 20 this year. One day a million of these horrible, blasphemous thoughts flood into my head at once and I'm horrified. The same thoughts come into my mind, over and over. Anything good and genuine I say about God and the Holy Spirit, the Devil attempts to twist around into something bad. So I've been trying to counteract these words with random words that aren't really words to kind of block what the Devil says, sort of as a "blah blah blah, I'm not listening to you Devil". Over the months I've noticed that new phrases will be introduced to my mind, and certain ones have stayed since the beginning. The most horrible thoughts...completely unspeakable. I’d be hearing things about the Mark of the Beast.

When I first heard them I was shocked, horrified, and I could feel this cold sensation rise in my stomach. I’d immediately shout “NO!” at these thoughts. Just like many of you, they come and go. Some days aren't too bad, and there was even one day where these thoughts barely came at all, which gave me some confidence. Then some days are just awful. I'll be calling out to God, begging him to do something about this. A couple times I even cried. I became worried about what my life will look like in the future with this large amount of stress, how it will affect my health. I wondered...when will this stop?

I'm mostly able to get sleep, but many times I've had trouble sleeping. There was even this one night that was the worst, and I found myself awake at 2am trying to deal with these thoughts, not able to go to sleep. The times that this affects me the most is when I’m waking up in the morning; and around 5:30 pm and into the night they get more intense and I start to feel extremely anxious and upset. This doesn't hugely interfere with me in my college classes & work/studying, thank God. But sometimes in class, the thoughts will come. When I'm trying to read a book, they'll try to come too, but thankfully I'm able to become absorbed in the reading and tune it out.

I know things could be worse, but this has definitely changed my life. My mom had told me about the unforgivable sin once, and I definitely took this seriously, vowing never to do this, because going to Heaven, being with God has meant everything to me since I was a little girl. I've grown up a Christian. I've been going to the same Church since I was a literally a baby. I was baptized a few years ago, and so was my brother. But ironically enough, the same year that I'd learned about the unforgivable sin was the same year that this torment came onto me (yes, 2018). I've never told anyone about this, not until this forum, but I haven't told my mom yet. I'm preparing myself to. I know the Devil is purposely trying to keep me from telling her, but I know I shouldn’t be afraid to. I know she’ll understand.

I'm ashamed to say I've never really sat down and immersed myself in the Bible. My mom reads the Bible every day. By all means, it's not that I've ever been against reading the Bible or anything. I've just never taken the time to do it. But I'm going to start now. Because that's something I realize I should've been doing long ago. Also, I've never really had a conversation with the Holy Spirit before until this started happening. Of course I don't deny Him, I just didn't know when I would be talking to Him, and what about. But since this situation, I've started talking to Him, telling Him how much He means to me, and asking Him to give me strength to fight this. I’ve asked to receive Him, for Him to fill my mind with His words, His presence. I’ve declared to Him that I want to be closer to Him, have a strong relationship with Him. I've been reading everyone's stories and taking their advice, which has honestly made me feel so much better. I'm learning how to stand up to the Devil. I'm starting to learn what I can do. Again, I'm so grateful to God for this website.

I'd been doing research about what to do about this ordeal and that's how I found this forum. Since this has been happening, I started feeling strangely uncomfortable whenever I'd hear something or see something related to Christ, Christianity, and I'd never felt this way before. I love watching these Youtube videos of this channel called a A Call For an Uprising, because he exposes the truth about our world, the New World Order, Illuminati, subliminal messages in pop culture, the dumbing down of society, etc. I love his videos because he helps everyone open their minds. But since this ordeal I weirdly started avoiding listening to his videos. I know I shouldn't, and now I realize that's exactly what the devil wants. I'd been afraid to do research for some time because I now realize that the Devil has been trying to make me feel guilty, trying to make me think that I've committed the unforgivable sin, that I'm the one thinking all these thoughts. But I know it's not me, because I would never do this.

I've started to say to the Devil, "No Devil, I will not say your lies nor will I believe your lies". And this does work to some degree. I often have to say it multiple times for him to go away. But every time he comes back, I just keep saying this to him, and addition telling him that I am a child of God. I've been rebuking the Devil, telling him that I bring God against him, to begone in Jesus name. I speak to God everyday, and I speak to the Holy Spirit all the time, praying for help, advice, and peace & comfort. Confidence. I believe this will get better in time, even if it never goes away completely.

I won't let this take over me and I'm determined to fight. Since discovering this website and learning that learning about the truth, and that I am saved, things have gotten so much better, and I'm starting to see an improvement with this ordeal. Now I'm becoming comfortable again with Christianity, and I'll be watching A Call for An Uprising's videos again. I feel so much better sharing this on a forum, because honestly I just didn't know who to talk to. Sorry this post is so long.


Thank you all, God bless you all. Besides myself, I'll be praying for everyone.

Hi Nicole

I understand exactly what you mean and how it makes you feel. The same happened to me for the last 7 years. It is the most horrible thing that could ever happen to anyone. The words that the devil uses are so bad that it is unspeakable. I just want you to know that these are not your thoughts, don't for a second think that it is, the more you believe it is, the more the devil will use it against you. When it starts to happen, just say in your mind or out loud Jesus I praise Your name, I give You worship glory and honor. Just start to praise God and worship Him. Once the devil see you start to do this he will know that he is defeated. Please try this and let me know how you feel within a week. I will be praying for you. I want to pray this prayer over you now.

Father in the name of Jesus I break every demonic foul spirit that tries to interfere with your daughters mind. Every lie of the devil I break in Jesus name. I cast out every spirit of blame and shame in the name of Jesus and I speak peace and calmness over her. Lord send down your healing over Nicoles mind and thoughts, do not allow the devil to use her mind against her. I cover her with the blood of Jesus and no weapon formed against her will prosper!! in Jesus mighty name. Amen.

Be blessed Nicole, I am praying for you.

 

[Nina21]

Hello, I am 22 years old and have been having bad thoughts for about 8 years. It was triggered in middle school when I was going through severe depression and had suicidal thoughts. I had a blasphemous thought towards the lord and felt so much anxiety afterwards. I begged for forgiveness and I believe he forgave me for that. However, I have had so many blasphemous thoughts since then triggered by different situations. Like cursing the lord and having sexual images of the lord. I know I don't feel this way about God, but my mind continues to believe god tortures me and therefore I continue to have the thoughts. These thoughts were especially triggered when I committ sinful acts such as sexual fantasies and masturbation, but I knew that the thoughts weren't rational so I continued the sinful act thinking I could control the thoughts and risk but I never could. I feel guilty because I dont like having the thoughts and would break down in tears in prayer. I also feel guilty because the thoughts could have been avoided if i stayed away from sinful acts and sexual desires. I pray everyday that the lord forgives me for my stupidity and careless attitude, but I feel he will not forgive me. I was a never a bad person and I would never speak ill of the lord in any fashion or try to convince others to not to believe in the lord, i just strayed away from the truth.