Don't want to go to church....

[Lightsped]

First of all, I realize that people don't have to go to church to be saved or to hold a relationship with God.

I have a friend (19 years old) who has been very interested in going to church and has done a really good job of doing so. During the past few weeks he has found "reasons" not to go.

He posted the following on Facebook tonight, and got the usual responses as to be expected by people nowadays about "Christians being hypocrites" and "not needing to go to church", etc....

What kind of real world advise can I give him, and what are some scriptures I could show him? I feel like I am greatly outnumbered because none of his other friends he is seeking advise from go to church/believe in God.

His Facebook post is below:
"havent felt like myself lately, haven't gone to church in 3 weeks and for some reason i dont feel guilty like i normally did, idk if its cus i'm burned out from work or if its cus i just dont feel the need to go anymore but is it wrong if i dont go but still have faith and pray to god when im going through good times and bad? Already talked to my friend bout it but still, i'm not feeling church anymore...."

 

[LoricaLady]

You say you realize, which is true, that people do not need to go to Church to be saved or to have a relationship with the Almighty. Yet you feel your friend should be going to Church and that you should find some way to talk him into doing that? I wonder why. I suppose you are getting benefits from going to Church, and if so that is great for you. However, that is not always true for others. It all depends on the Church and the person's particular walk with and devotion to the truth of the Word.

How does the Bible say to celebrate the Sabbath? (A study of history from RCC, Protestant and secular sources btw, shows the first Church kept the Fri. eve to Sat. Sabbath for over 100 years until other influences crept in, but that's another story.) It says to rest on that day, for even our animals and servants to rest. We are told to keep it set apart, holy unto YHWH, and to not go our own ways on that day.

Most people go to Church on Sunday and feel they have done their Christian duty. Then they work in the office or online, go shopping or out to eat where "servants" have to wait on them, and may not uncommonly watch antiBiblical entertainment sources.

I would advise your friend to keep the Sabbath holy by keeping the Sabbath as the Bible tells us to do so. That has nothing to do with Church, which the apostles and early believers never heard of.

Praying for wisdom for you and your friend.

 

[Autumnleaf]

Church is the body of believers of Christ. I'm in Church right now on this forum. I don't need a building full of people to be in fellowship... but I will be in a couple of those today with like minded people who have much in common with me. If your friend doesn't want to go then tell him that's fine. When God wants him back He will throw a monkey wrench into the works of his life that crashes everything down around him and then he will search for God and find Him right where he left Him.

 

[Lightsped]

I failed to mention that isn't just not going to church..... He also said he hasn't been praying or anything for over three weeks. With this and the lack of fellowship and worship with other Christians I see this as a weak spot in his "armor" that the devil can possibly benefit from. It seems like a very bad habit to get started on.

 

[Autumnleaf]

I failed to mention that isn't just not going to church..... He also said he hasn't been praying or anything for over three weeks. With this and the lack of fellowship and worship with other Christians I see this as a weak spot in his "armor" that the devil can possibly benefit from. It seems like a very bad habit to get started on.

You are probably right.

 

[LilLamb219]

Is your friend suffering from Depression? Or did something happen to make him mad at God or Christians? I wouldn't push him into anything but occasionally encourage him and continue inviting him to join you at church. Pushing him would steer him in the wrong direction. Ask him if he would like to talk about things and see where that goes.

 

[x141]

I failed to mention that isn't just not going to church..... He also said he hasn't been praying or anything for over three weeks. With this and the lack of fellowship and worship with other Christians I see this as a weak spot in his "armor" that the devil can possibly benefit from. It seems like a very bad habit to get started on.

His footsteps are just as ordered now as were his footsteps that brought him to Christ (you can use Paul's words (called from his mother's womb) as a picture of this truth).

Don't limit God ...

Prayer and fellowship go much deeper as a relationship with our Father that is continual, and personnel (as a way of life, or a walk that we walk), and it cannot be found in any church or with another, other than the one who abides in us, who never leaves us, and never forsakes us.

Everybody turns back into the wilderness, it's just some keep going to church when they do.

 

[Lightsped]

To my knowledge he isn't suffering from depression. He is VERY busy though. Working 40 hours a week and starting college. His dad also keeps him busy with chores as well.

I don't intend to push him to go to church. He used to really enjoy it, and now it seems he isn't happy there. He says it is difficult to focus at church and he has lost the desire.

I will say this, this morning after hearing all of the typical "church is for hypocrites", and "no one needs to go" responses on his FaceBook page he replied with the following comment.
"I think I know what I need to do �� thanks guys it means a lot, I appreciate the help I really do, imma get in touch with my youth minister, I think sitting down with him for a few minutes will clear up my mind some more."

 

[Albion]

That last comment from him is unexpected. However, I basically agree with Lil Lamb that you shouldn't overreact. People go through episodes. He will likely come out of it.

The gentlest help in this case is most likely the most effective. I was also thinking that you could say something about looking into a Christian club while he's at college.

 

[DiscipleHeLovesToo]

there are two right reasons to go to church; to let God minister to others there through you, and to prepare to overcome your world through His love.

your friend can connect with God anywhere and everywhere; as he does, God will lead him to the church that's right for him, when he's ready to go.

stress God's unconditional love and 'anywhere availability' to your friend, and trust God to lead him in the right direction; point your friend to God's word, and speak the gospel that you know to him, and you will both grow in God's love as you seek Him based on faith in His undeserved favor toward you.

 

[tulipbee]

First of all, I realize that people don't have to go to church to be saved or to hold a relationship with God.

I have a friend (19 years old) who has been very interested in going to church and has done a really good job of doing so. During the past few weeks he has found "reasons" not to go.

He posted the following on Facebook tonight, and got the usual responses as to be expected by people nowadays about "Christians being hypocrites" and "not needing to go to church", etc....

What kind of real world advise can I give him, and what are some scriptures I could show him? I feel like I am greatly outnumbered because none of his other friends he is seeking advise from go to church/believe in God.

His Facebook post is below:
"havent felt like myself lately, haven't gone to church in 3 weeks and for some reason i dont feel guilty like i normally did, idk if its cus i'm burned out from work or if its cus i just dont feel the need to go anymore but is it wrong if i dont go but still have faith and pray to god when im going through good times and bad? Already talked to my friend bout it but still, i'm not feeling church anymore...."

I noticed on some church goers has turned church into sports. It's become like a rally or fan based. The louder they sing the better. The more emotional they get better chances they get saved. The harder the work the better. I visited a Baptist church and most of it was entertainment, not worship. I visited a church of God and I got bribed in accepting Christ with a restaurant gift card.

 

[Quasicentennial]

The church is an organization where you can listen to the pastor's interpretation and experience related to life today, sing songs of worship and pray for Christ's healing for our problem circumstances, become a financial partner to support the church in future goals and charities if any:.
With television and internet technology, you can join more than one church by going online such as Joyce Meyer, Benny Hinn, Creflo Dollar - or just choose only one of them if socializing in person is not possible, such as working at the airport on Sundays:.
Church by definition is the body of Christ as we become "spiritually one" or united with Jesus, but then again, you wonder how Christians react responsibly when it comes to showing our talents through service, singing/playing Christian music songs, and praying out loud through the microphone on stage:.
Church service is definitely an eye-opening experience into the future-coming kingdom of God where every new brother and sister of Christ will be so Christ-transformed with genius-intelligent minds and measure-perfect bodies, that nobody will be talent-less in any chosen field or goal, such as professional sports, singing songs and playing musical instruments, especially professional casino-level cooking - that's if Jesus allows favorite meals, such as lasagne, green leaf salad dressing and pizza besides cake and dessert.;'*';.

 

[parsley]

He is VERY busy though. Working 40 hours a week and starting college. His dad also keeps him busy with chores as well.

All the more reason to rest! This realization of his human limits might drive him to value the Sabbath rest even more than he had before.

The Sabbath (day of rest) was made for man, not man for the Sabbath (showing rule-keeping).

Think about symptom vs. illness. You are concerned about a potential illness, but are talking about fixing it by stopping the cough instead of the germs. Appearances gone.

Talk to him about why, what he's observing and feeling, and let him express what's going on... let him repair what he regrets, at the pace he needs to go.

Fear can drive us to take panicked measures; hold back your fear of him falling off course, and allow twists and turns in the course. He is assessing real issues -- like mbe it feels irrelevant when so much responsibility is piled on him, and a song leader is shouting, "Clap your hands! No, louder!"

Or he might be running into people who say careless things, and it feels like more work -- one more thing to deal with that he has no energy for.

Is he in full-time school? The credit system was designed for people who were not working, even though most do work some hours. If he is working 40 hours and taking a full load, and doing chores, then he barely has time to sleep. People get ambitious and feel invincible, and then hit these realizations of limits.

With this only September, it will not get better unless he makes changes to his schedule.

 

[Albion]

The church is an organization where you can listen to the pastor's interpretation and experience related to life today, sing songs of worship and pray for Christ's healing for our problem circumstances, become a financial partner to support the church in future goals and charities if any:.
With television and internet technology, you can join more than one church by going online such as Joyce Meyer, Benny Hinn, Creflo Dollar - or just choose only one of them if socializing in person is not possible, such as working at the airport on Sundays:.

Whether or not substituting a TV show for a Christian congregation makes sense, those shows and evangelists are not offering the viewer a worship service--and you certainly do not "join" a church by tuning in. They are only televised sermons.

Church by definition is the body of Christ

If we accept that definition, which is true only to the extent that it is one meaning of the word among several, we still are faced with all the other obligations that Scripture lays before us as believers that are left unattended to if this is what one consider to be his "church."

 

[parsley]

And even more, Facebook does not replace face-to-face confidential conversations. If you respond on FB, a debate will ensue and the nastiest person will feel like they won. The guy is expressing a change of heart, and that is probably as unsettling to him as it is to you. Ask him if he has time for coffee.

 

[quietpraiyze]

First of all, I realize that people don't have to go to church to be saved or to hold a relationship with God.

I have a friend (19 years old) who has been very interested in going to church and has done a really good job of doing so. During the past few weeks he has found "reasons" not to go.

Is there a reason why you can't fellowship with your friend right where he's at? The Word says, "wherever two or three are gathered together in Christ name...". You can share everyday life and the Word. You can share what God is doing for you through the Word and ask him the same. You can pray with and for him in earnest. You can stay in touch with him, encourage him, and be a friend. Many people fail at being the Church and the one anothering, always looking to someone else to do it but you're the one there now. So be the Church and not churchy. Sometimes I think people act like church is a panacea but it's not. While it's good to have fellowship with other Christians, our dependency is to be on Christ alone. Christ doesn't command us to go to church, but He does command us to love one another. You're a good friend to care about your friend. Just don't make assumptions about the will of God for him. ​

 

[Mister_Al]

If your friend doesn't want to go to church then honor his decision. God won't punish him for not going. Also, there is a possibility that the Lord may not want him in that particular place right now. Just relax until things play out.

Pray for your friend.

Alan

 

[Lightsped]

Oh believe me, I have been praying for him. Only update I have is that our youth/college pastor had a couple of the college kids call him. Not sure what was talked about, but he said it did good. My friend still wants to meet with the youth/college pastor.

 

[Lightsped]

Well, unfortunately I am having to revisit this topic. Previously my friend had been pretty good about going to church. During the past couple of weeks it has been difficult for him to get to church on time, or even to go at all. He had told me he would be there today, and he never did show up.

He called a while ago telling me again, that he just doesn't like going. He doesn't know why he doesn't like going.

Now before everyone replies telling me "you don't have to go to church to be saved" do realize that I am fully aware of that. This particular friend of mine watches a lot of television (most of it unhealthy) and is on the internet a lot (most of it unhealthy). His other friends are of very questionable influence.

The reason I have been pushing him to go to church is so that he can have a hour per week where he is surrounded by good influences and is learning about Christ with other Christians. The idea of watching a surmon on TV or interenet wouldn't work as there are always outside interuptions when at home on TV ort the computer. It isn't the same as going to a church.

I do consider this friend a "young Christian" in that he has only been going to church for two years or so. He wasn't raised in a Christian home.

Anyways, what are some scriptures or reasons someone SHOULD go to church? Again, I realize it is not a necessity to go to church so there is need typing that out.

Thanks for any help and support.

 

[anewman1993]

He may need to try a new church. But I would also tell him this. "church is for the sick, you don't get angry because there are sick people in the Doctors office".

Of COURSE its full of hypocrites, we are ALL fallen people who many times know whats right but ignore it for our own pleasure, thats one of the fights Christians fight, against their own flesh.