Does CAsh Matter?

[intricatic]

Gah! I love Bob Dylan! Of course you couldn't understand the poor man part of the time. But what a writer.

I don't need to understand the words, the music itself translates that for me. Then later, when I read the words I'm like 'whoa, that's exactly what I was thinking he was saying...'

 

[indra_fanatic]

First I'm clueless to what IMHO means. Second, like I said, it's not about money. The question would be is he doing anything to further a career to get himself out of debt?

I'm in a little debt myself, but I used the credit card because I knew that I was going to have a good job and be able to pay it off in the near future.

In my humble opinion...

And BTW, spending yourself into the red in the hopes that you will soon enough be able to dig yourself out of it is playing with fire in a big way.

 

[indra_fanatic]

Wow-- I thought she was being pretty honest and true--

My question is why chew on her and not the rest of us who said exact same thing..

It does apply to everyone who said the same thing. It doesn't matter how honest you are being--if you gals place an inordinate emphasis on material things, Scripture calls that idolatry (Col 3:5). Thus, you now have a choice of whether or not to do anything about it.

 

[~HopeFloats~]

In my humble opinion...

And BTW, spending yourself into the red in the hopes that you will soon enough be able to dig yourself out of it is playing with fire in a big way.

OH Please-- Debt is a fact of life you will never ever be out of Debt..

I think the OP who brought up debt meant serious DEBT as in close to Bankruptcy

I have been out of school since 99 and I am still paying off debt and when I have that paid off there will be a house or some other debt... DEBT is a fact of life plain and simple!

I took a course with work about planning for my retirement in 2032 and ya knwo that dude made it clear that in some way we are always going to be in debt till at least 55 in my case ---> Man i need a surgar Daddy

 

[~HopeFloats~]

It does apply to everyone who said the same thing. It doesn't matter how honest you are being--if you gals place an inordinate emphasis on material things, Scripture calls that idolatry (Col 3:5). Thus, you now have a choice of whether or not to do anything about it.

Well I see it like this--

I chose not to be living in poverty-- we have the chance to get a education get a career and provide for a family like one should-- that is what she meant I am sure--

Having a career and being able to provide for a family( wife and kids) is being a responsible person.

Man am I on my soap box today..

 

[indra_fanatic]

Well I see it like this--

I chose not to be living in poverty-- we have the chance to get a education get a career and provide for a family like one should-- that is what she meant I am sure--

Having a career and being able to provide for a family( wife and kids) is being a responsible person.

Man am I on my soap box today..

There is a difference between not wanting to be poor and being able to take care of necessities and desiring "the good life" and wanting luxuries. Some of you seemed to be wanting the latter.

 

[indra_fanatic]

I took a course with work about planning for my retirement in 2032 and ya knwo that dude made it clear that in some way we are always going to be in debt till at least 55 in my case ---> Man i need a surgar Daddy

Pardon me if this is OT, but does the fact that you are already looking forward to retirement indicate that you are in a job you despise?

 

[~HopeFloats~]

There is a difference between not wanting to be poor and being able to take care of necessities and desiring "the good life" and wanting luxuries. Some of you seemed to be wanting the latter.

Where did anyone say they wanted Luxuries???

Are you assuming things? ***What is with all this negativity I see ****

Seems to me so many guys thing women are out for there money--only looking for a guy with a nice car a nice house and ect..

Fact is you have no clue at all what a women really wants..

It is the little things in life that makes us happy

 

[~HopeFloats~]

Pardon me if this is OT, but does the fact that you are already looking forward to retirement indicate that you are in a job you despise?

Nope I work for the goverment and they make us plan for retirement

 

[indra_fanatic]

Where did anyone say they wanted Luxuries???

Are you assuming things? ***What is with all this negativity I see ****

Go back to the post I responded to originally by Chanis.

Seems to me so many guys thing women are out for there money--only looking for a guy with a nice car a nice house and ect..

As a rule, that tends to be true, just like it is stereotypically true that men want to date/marry blond bimboes with big boobs who are half their age. I never said either one is right, just that it is a fact of life. There is a certain biological wiring for each thing, but even more so a cultural wiring.

Fact is you have no clue at all what a women really wants.

So you are upset with my reaction to a post that seemed to go along with your characterization of guys' thoughts?

 

[BeautyForAshes]

Seems to me so many guys thing women are out for there money--only looking for a guy with a nice car a nice house and ect..

These same guys that believe this often forget that there are PLENTY of women who already have those things (nice car, house, etc.) through their own career and hard work. So now that the money issue is a moot point, maybe two people can really get to know each other.

Although, if a guy thinks the best thing he has a to offer a woman is his bank account, then there are bigger issues at play.

 

[chanis]

Indra, I believe you've got me totally wrong here...not sure where your assumptions came from...

Is that placing all of your trust in God first and foremost?

it's not that I don't trust God but we have to be realistic and look at the fact that relationships are destryoed because there are issues with the finances...if I go in blindly into a relationship JUST becasue I love the dude and don't take all else into consideration I'm being a fool and not using my cabeza, which can ultimatley lead to a very unhealthy relationship...

So you are placing material needs over all other things? What would happen if your powerful exec dude is the victim of a crippling workplace injury and must subsist on disability payments for the rest of his life? Would you leave him?

whoa buddy...no one asked about leaving people we're currently with...look at the OP we were being asked:

When it comes to considering a potential partner(who is a christian), does it matter if they have a lot cream(dough, money, cash, wealth)?

in CONSDIERING a potential it's not talking about someone you're already involved with...that's a whole separate issue...

Surely you are not justifying divorce...

dude you've got it twisted...let's be realistic no one likes divorce or the effects it has on the couple/children BUT it happens and we have deal with the reality that this IS a major cause of divorce so why even enter into a situation that can lead there...no where did I say I was justifying divorce...

With all due respect, this attitude is kind of unscriptural. Does the man belong to Christ? Is he capable of taking care of himself? Is he not engaging in reckless or inappropriate spending?

unscriptural ...dude before making a statement like that back it up with scripture...just because one's opinon doesn't coincide with yours doesn't make me wrong...this is simply my opinon not yours...

If the above are all true, everything else is up to God. You may never get that Cadillac, three-story house, Olympic-sized pool, etc., but then again I don't see a reason why any of us should want those things to begin with.

you know with that limiting mentality you might be settling for less than what God wants for you...I don't think there's a problem with setting goals for yourself...God wants us to prosper by using our talents and abilities AND to enjoy the fruit of our labor so if all this does bring me the 3-story house, the cars, pool, and what ever else you better believe I'm gonna live it up!

 

[chanis]

These same guys that believe this often forget that there are PLENTY of women who already have those things (nice car, house, etc.) through their own career and hard work. So now that the money issue is a moot point, maybe two people can really get to know each other.

Although, if a guy thinks the best thing he has a to offer a woman is his bank account, then there are bigger issues at play.

yeah totally!!!

BTW sign me up for a sugar daddy , lol....

 

[septemberskies]

When it comes to considering a potential partner(who is a christian), does it matter if they have a lot cream(dough, money, cash, wealth)?

It doesn't matter if he is wealthy... however it does matter whether he is self-sufficient or not. If he can't take care of himself then he can take care of me and the possible children that we may have along the way. So that doesn't make for a good spouse & father IMO.

 

[Niels]

OH Please-- Debt is a fact of life you will never ever be out of Debt..

I think the OP who brought up debt meant serious DEBT as in close to Bankruptcy

I have been out of school since 99 and I am still paying off debt and when I have that paid off there will be a house or some other debt... DEBT is a fact of life plain and simple!

I took a course with work about planning for my retirement in 2032 and ya knwo that dude made it clear that in some way we are always going to be in debt till at least 55 in my case ---> Man i need a surgar Daddy

What's funny is that I didn't realize this until recently. Well maybe I did to a degree, but it took a while to sink in. My parents always seemed to buy things outright (for example: when they bought a car, they bought a car upfront... not in installments etc.) I've been living a modest lifestyle, but as it turns out, I don't have to if I don't want to. With my good credit etc. I could easily go out and finance more house than I need. Not saying I will, but a condo isn't out of the question.

I'll probably never be a "sugar daddy", as that's simply not my style.

That said, I still don't think I have much in common with "high-power women" (eww) driving around in BMWs, while chatting it up about beach houses on their cellphones... even if they aren't actually wealthier than I am. Something definitely turns me off about their lifestyle, and it has little to do with intimidation. Not that I don't like beach houses etc.

 

[Silver Speak]

of course it doesn't matter. And looks don't matter either.

You hit the nail!

Seriously now, I need my monthly facials and manicures!! Okay, that's not true but my answer is YES, it matters. Okay, to be more specific, I'm not looking to live on his money. However, I do look up to guys who works hard (not obsessively, duh) and knows how to manage his finances. I can't stand a guy who can't get a thing done; talks big but doesn't even lift a finger.. Total turn-off.

 

[enelya_taralom]

I don't think that how much money someone earns would be the issue. I would try to find out how they spend their money? Do they tithe? Do they waste it on material things? etc.

I agree If we were to have a family I'd want to be a stay-at-home Mom, so he would need to be able to provide, but I think this does have more to do with how money is spent vs. how much is made (to a certain extent anyway). He if makes tons of money but isn't willing to make sacrifices for our family, and spends it all on the "latest and greatest" than this is far worse than the man who makes barely enough to get by, but then spends it all on his family.

 

[indra_fanatic]

it's not that I don't trust God but we have to be realistic and look at the fact that relationships are destryoed because there are issues with the finances...if I go in blindly into a relationship JUST becasue I love the dude and don't take all else into consideration I'm being a fool and not using my cabeza, which can ultimatley lead to a very unhealthy relationship...

I am sorry to say this, but these kinds of standards will likely set you up to completely miss the perfect man that God has for you--either because you will fail to look at someone who isn't successful or because your material wants will repel the man. I am not some kind of a fortuneteller, but when you make non-essentials like this, especially those of a material nature, criteria for a husband, you always tread on dangerous ground.

You say that you aren't using your head if you go "blindly" into a relationship without looking at anything but love. Well, let me turn that around on you and ask... would you refuse to "blindly" trust God and everything He might have or not have in store for you?

you've got it twisted...let's be realistic no one likes divorce or the effects it has on the couple/children BUT it happens and we have deal with the reality that this IS a major cause of divorce so why even enter into a situation that can lead there...no where did I say I was justifying divorce...

Chanis, if I really have "gotten it twisted", then why do you leave open that the situation could "lead there" at all? I thought that when saved people who are on fire for God get married that divorce isn't even considered a remote possibility... if you already are resigning yourself to divorce as a possible final outcome to financial stress, are you not dooming the marriage before it starts?

unscriptural ...dude before making a statement like that back it up with scripture...just because one's opinon doesn't coincide with yours doesn't make me wrong...this is simply my opinon not yours...

Do you really need me to give you all the verses dealing with the love of money? I would be more than happy to provide you with an exhaustive list, but shouldn't some teachings be obvious?

you know with that limiting mentality you might be settling for less than what God wants for you

Limiting how? Are you trying to say that I should only look for girls with the bucks? Why would God only want me to marry someone successful (in the worldly sense)?

I don't think there's a problem with setting goals for yourself...God wants us to prosper by using our talents and abilities AND to enjoy the fruit of our labor so if all this does bring me the 3-story house, the cars, pool, and what ever else you better believe I'm gonna live it up!

Scripture for this?

If indeed you are conceding that my original characterization of your views was correct, then why the need to argue with me throughout this post?

What your priorities are is between you and God. You appear to have bought into the "name it/claim it" philosophy and the gospel of wealth. If you have checked the Scriptures and your own heart and truly believe that that is sound and biblical, go right ahead. I can't tell you how to think. I hope that you do find that man who meets your exacting financial standards, but the odds of finding someone who does AND has a right heart with God AND is totally interested in you have to be fairly slim.

 

[Blank123]

Indra, if you feel its perfectly all right for you to get married and raise a family with poor finances, then by all means go ahead. Quit your job, sell your possessions and get hitched.

but there really isn't any Biblical justification for attacking someone because they want to end up with someone who makes enough money to be able to handle a family and who is a good steward - someone who can handle his money responsibly.

 

[mina]

A lot of awesome Christian families I know are poor. Not because they weren't responsible a lot of it was because of circumstance- an unseen sickness, a job loss, etc. But they have what they need because God provides. Not having money doesn't scare me, but marrying someone that can't or won't be responsible does. Racking up debt, blowing money on things you don't need is scary to me. Whoever I marry I want to be respectful of what they make and use it wisely. I think it's important to agree on spending and finacial responsibility before you marry someone, otherwise it can cause disaster and strain on your marriage. Marriage is hard enough already without adding problems to it. I think it's Biblical that we are all to be good stewards and trustworthy of what God gives to us no matter if it's a little or a lot, but you don't have to be making a ton of money to be good marriage material.