So I grew up in church, and I have pretty much believed and been taught the gospel my whole life. Like there was never any question for me as to whether I believed the Bible stories I was taught at church or not, I always believed it. I came to a realization the consequences of not being saved at 8 years old and talked with my parents and my grandpa who was my church's pastor and he talked me through everything and made sure I understood what Jesus did for us, that I am a sinner that needs to ask for forgiveness and to ask the Lord to save me so I can go to Heaven and live my life for him. So at that time I got saved and baptized by my grandpa at age 8.
All through my life I have struggled with terrible anxiety over literally EVERYTHING and ANYTHING. My family and friends can vouch for that as well and they always tell me I worry too much over most things. So I don't know if this is one of those things or not.
So basically when I got a bit older in to my pre-teens/teens I fell into an addiction with inappropriate contentography/masturbation and for the longest time didn't even realize I was doing something wrong ( I don't know how I could be so dense) But then eventually I did realize it was wrong and started to feel bad about it and would feel bad after doing it, would tell God I was sorry, ask for forgiveness and try not to do it again but eventually would end up giving in to temptation and doing it again. This happened for many years. I would feel guilty and pray for forgiveness and also would worry I wasn't saved because I did those things and would pray for God to save me over and over again because of the anxiety I had over this.
Now here I am at 25 years old and I am finally after much prayer and talking with God I am winning my battle with this sin. I can feel that God has made me stronger to resist temptation and I want to obey Him now more that ever. I am closer to God than I have ever been before in my entire life of believing on Him and His word. But my anxiety sometimes still comes and makes me worry about one thing: If I was saved at 8 years old, why was I sinning for many years (at first unknowingly, then knowingly) after the fact, and if I wasn't actually saved until later, do I need to be baptized again? I know I am saved now, I feel God speaking to me and I get very emotional in prayer with Him sometimes it brings me to tears. I love God and am so grateful for what Jesus has done for me and my family.
I hope I have explained everything I am feeling/thinking well enough. I have never stopped believing, nor have I ever rejected God and never will. It hurts my heart to see or hear people say things against God. I love God so much.
To sum everything up I guess here is what I am saying:
-I got saved and baptized at a young age
-Fell into sin in my teens, didn't realize I was sinning at first
-Have finally conquered my habitual sin
-I wonder if it is bad that it took this long for me to finally grow this close to God
-Do I need to be baptized again? I certainly did mean it the first time and it was done correctly in the name of the Son, the Father and the Holy Ghost
God Bless you all! <3
** Update **
I ultimately decided to be baptized again after feeling led by the Lord to do so. I was re-baptized on May 16th 2021, but this time I know for sure that my heart was in the right place and I completely understood what Jesus has done for me.
Thank you all for your help! <3
All through my life I have struggled with terrible anxiety over literally EVERYTHING and ANYTHING. My family and friends can vouch for that as well and they always tell me I worry too much over most things. So I don't know if this is one of those things or not.
So basically when I got a bit older in to my pre-teens/teens I fell into an addiction with inappropriate contentography/masturbation and for the longest time didn't even realize I was doing something wrong ( I don't know how I could be so dense) But then eventually I did realize it was wrong and started to feel bad about it and would feel bad after doing it, would tell God I was sorry, ask for forgiveness and try not to do it again but eventually would end up giving in to temptation and doing it again. This happened for many years. I would feel guilty and pray for forgiveness and also would worry I wasn't saved because I did those things and would pray for God to save me over and over again because of the anxiety I had over this.
Now here I am at 25 years old and I am finally after much prayer and talking with God I am winning my battle with this sin. I can feel that God has made me stronger to resist temptation and I want to obey Him now more that ever. I am closer to God than I have ever been before in my entire life of believing on Him and His word. But my anxiety sometimes still comes and makes me worry about one thing: If I was saved at 8 years old, why was I sinning for many years (at first unknowingly, then knowingly) after the fact, and if I wasn't actually saved until later, do I need to be baptized again? I know I am saved now, I feel God speaking to me and I get very emotional in prayer with Him sometimes it brings me to tears. I love God and am so grateful for what Jesus has done for me and my family.
I hope I have explained everything I am feeling/thinking well enough. I have never stopped believing, nor have I ever rejected God and never will. It hurts my heart to see or hear people say things against God. I love God so much.
To sum everything up I guess here is what I am saying:
-I got saved and baptized at a young age
-Fell into sin in my teens, didn't realize I was sinning at first
-Have finally conquered my habitual sin
-I wonder if it is bad that it took this long for me to finally grow this close to God
-Do I need to be baptized again? I certainly did mean it the first time and it was done correctly in the name of the Son, the Father and the Holy Ghost
God Bless you all! <3
** Update **
I ultimately decided to be baptized again after feeling led by the Lord to do so. I was re-baptized on May 16th 2021, but this time I know for sure that my heart was in the right place and I completely understood what Jesus has done for me.
Thank you all for your help! <3
Last edited: