- Jun 30, 2015
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- United States
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Single
Just throwing this out there for some additional perspectives...
I broke up with my last girlfriend in February or so. We weren't a good fit or at the same place spiritually. She didn't take it well...
Since then, I've been leery of starting another relationship. So many women in my age range; 35 to 50, are only wanting a physical/romantic relationship. That was what my last couple of relationships were structured around and I didn't like it and God didn't like it.
Since then, I've accepted my singleness wholeheartedly and have been focusing on work and going to the gym. Last week I started dieting seriously because I didn't like how I looked and not so I would attract a mate.
About a month ago I heard a sermon that really changed my heart and has renewed my focus on living a Godly life and focusing on Him instead of my own selfish desires.
So what does all of this rambling have to do with dating and Bible Study??
I started going to a weekly Bible study back in February. It was all married couples from their late 20's to their mid 60's. I was the odd man out being a single divorced guy in my 40's. But, I enjoyed the fellowship and went as regularly as possible.
A couple of months ago, two single ladies joined the study. One is a young attractive college student and the other is a beautiful single woman in her late 30's or early 40's. I mean, she is so beautiful that it takes my breath away when I look at her.
She is also quiet and a bit shy. I know a little bit about her from just our few little conversations we've had before or after Bible study. I know she's from Michigan, has eight brothers and sisters, and works in a beauty salon. When we talk, it is very polite and pleasant. She is so hard to read and I'm not sure if she is being shy or standoffish when we talk.
I sent her a Facebook friend request last week and she accepted it immediately, which is a good sign, and we chatted at last week's Bible study a little more. But she hasn't liked any of my posts or pictures, which is usually a sign that someone is just being polite and not really interested in you personally. But then again, she doesn't have any posts in the last couple of months so she's not really a prolific FB user... Geesh, I sound like I'm in high school...
So, normally, I would just ask her out and if she said no, then I'd know where I stand and move on.
But, I don't want things to get awkward and have one or both of us stop going to a Bible study that we both enjoy because our feelings weren't mutual for each other. So, this is why I haven't attempted to ask her out. I am enjoying being single and having a group of Christian friends to share with. I don't want to lose that or cause her to lose that because of my romantic feelings for her. Then again, I haven't even really talked to her enough to determine if I do have genuine romantic feelings for her...
On the other hand... She is sweet, Christian, beautiful, and age appropriate. That's super rare in my area and I don't want to miss out on a potentially wonderful and Godly relationship because I was being too conservative and overthinking things.
I really don't know what to do. I pray about it every night and am trying to just be patient and see if our small talk progresses naturally to me getting a clearer perspective of her feelings about me.
So please, some additional perspective and thoughts would be appreciated...
I broke up with my last girlfriend in February or so. We weren't a good fit or at the same place spiritually. She didn't take it well...
Since then, I've been leery of starting another relationship. So many women in my age range; 35 to 50, are only wanting a physical/romantic relationship. That was what my last couple of relationships were structured around and I didn't like it and God didn't like it.
Since then, I've accepted my singleness wholeheartedly and have been focusing on work and going to the gym. Last week I started dieting seriously because I didn't like how I looked and not so I would attract a mate.
About a month ago I heard a sermon that really changed my heart and has renewed my focus on living a Godly life and focusing on Him instead of my own selfish desires.
So what does all of this rambling have to do with dating and Bible Study??
I started going to a weekly Bible study back in February. It was all married couples from their late 20's to their mid 60's. I was the odd man out being a single divorced guy in my 40's. But, I enjoyed the fellowship and went as regularly as possible.
A couple of months ago, two single ladies joined the study. One is a young attractive college student and the other is a beautiful single woman in her late 30's or early 40's. I mean, she is so beautiful that it takes my breath away when I look at her.
She is also quiet and a bit shy. I know a little bit about her from just our few little conversations we've had before or after Bible study. I know she's from Michigan, has eight brothers and sisters, and works in a beauty salon. When we talk, it is very polite and pleasant. She is so hard to read and I'm not sure if she is being shy or standoffish when we talk.
I sent her a Facebook friend request last week and she accepted it immediately, which is a good sign, and we chatted at last week's Bible study a little more. But she hasn't liked any of my posts or pictures, which is usually a sign that someone is just being polite and not really interested in you personally. But then again, she doesn't have any posts in the last couple of months so she's not really a prolific FB user... Geesh, I sound like I'm in high school...
So, normally, I would just ask her out and if she said no, then I'd know where I stand and move on.
But, I don't want things to get awkward and have one or both of us stop going to a Bible study that we both enjoy because our feelings weren't mutual for each other. So, this is why I haven't attempted to ask her out. I am enjoying being single and having a group of Christian friends to share with. I don't want to lose that or cause her to lose that because of my romantic feelings for her. Then again, I haven't even really talked to her enough to determine if I do have genuine romantic feelings for her...
On the other hand... She is sweet, Christian, beautiful, and age appropriate. That's super rare in my area and I don't want to miss out on a potentially wonderful and Godly relationship because I was being too conservative and overthinking things.
I really don't know what to do. I pray about it every night and am trying to just be patient and see if our small talk progresses naturally to me getting a clearer perspective of her feelings about me.
So please, some additional perspective and thoughts would be appreciated...