Okay so a few days ago my wife really hurt me emotionally. Is rather not say what it was because I'm afraid that people will call me out and judge me as stupid. It is a semi stupid thing to be mad and hurt about. I mean its not like she cheated on me or anything like that. That would be a real reason to be mad and hurt. But basically I cannot stop bringing it up and she is crying every time and says how sorry she is and how much of a b word she was being. And yeah I agree with her she was being a you know what. But since she is so sorry and since Christ told us to forgive others I really WANT to forgive her. But... I can't. I am just so hurt inside and I cannot stop thinking about it. I've tried praying to God multiple times about it and its like he's just saying "yeah, you need to forgive her". And that's something I already know! But... I don't know how to do that I am just so hurt inside. I have told my wife that I'm sorry and I forgive her and then like an hour later it comes up and we start fighting again. How do you forgive others who have wronged you? I mean it IS a small thing when you think about it but I just can't forgive and forget. I'm not God.
It sounds like you are 'asking for her to repay your debt, yet expecting not to have to repay the debt you have been forgiven by God'.
So, the problem is with you, not her.
Why should God forgive your sins - if he has forgiven them - when you are not going to forgive anyone else's sins?
If these statements do not ring a bell with you, then you do not have the word Jesus spoke. As I am merely paraphrasing and quoting what Jesus said. He also said much else on this subject.
The prayer we do contains 'God forgive us our sins, as we forgive others their sins against us'.
If you want God to condemn you using the standards you are using to condemn your wife, then you better be right. 'Because it is by your own standards you are judged, pressed and heaped over.'
But, you are clearly not right here, so this is what Paul said people do, when the approve of sinful behavior, they 'mock God', and warned, 'God is not mocked'.
Therefore, if you want to prevent disaster happening to you, your best bet is to forgive her the debt she owes you.
You owe God a great debt, far greater then she owes you.
So, you are not God, you are right about that.
But, you are only being asked to forgive a very small debt.
Not the debt that God forgave you.
This sort of situation is exactly equal to needling someone for money they owe them, and not giving up.
You don't want just a little back, you want it back with enormous interest rates she can not pay.
Might as well take her to court and sue her for a million dollars, if you keep this up.