How can I learn to forgive my wife?

[paul becke]

My wife packed-up and left me nearly four years ago. Stole my car. Told all kinds of horrible lies about me. Made false accusations in court filings that I had emotionally abused her. Moved in with and started sleeping with another man who had been in prison. Divorced me. Is about to marry him in a few weeks.

I have forgiven her. Because for the Christian not forgiving someone is NOT AN OPTION! We have been forgiven absolutely EVERYTHING through Christ. So we cannot hold things against any other human being. No matter what they are. When it comes to forgiveness the Bible just paints a big old Nike swoosh on there and says Just Do It.

It sounds as if you had a nasty spat with your wife, but please consider the positives. She is still with you. You can come home and be with her each day. You have very real opportunities to continue your marriage and to make it grow and prosper in the future. I wish I still had that.

Please do not endanger that, or your salvation, by being hard-hearted.

'Because for the Christian not forgiving someone is NOT AN OPTION!'

Yes. Absolutely pivotal.

 

[paul becke]

Its funny you should bring mental illness up. I was diagnosed schizo-affective several years ago. So I was thinking that maybe it was my schizo-affective disorder acting up. There are days when I am better and days where I am not. Like maybe I'm manic? But then again I'm sleeping and usually when I'm manic I don't sleep for weeks at a time. So I'm if I'm manic or not. But basically when I'm manic I feel like this so maybe I am being hypomanic? *shrug*.

I am very glad you have taken my suggestion in the right spirit, Neo. There is somethig about it that strikes me as somewhat pathological - and I have had my own mental troubles, although not of that nature. So, don't beat yourself up about it, but persevere, and when you can find it in you, try to make little gestures to reassure your wife.

Harping on things in that way, sounds to this layman, as if that schizo-affective disorder could have something to do with it. You might even even consider making another appointment with the 'trick-cyclist'. Best wishes to you both anyway.

 

[Neostarwcc]

Just figured I'd give you guys an update. My wife and I talked things out and its done and over with. I've forgiven her and we've moved on from it. Thank you for all of your helpful advice it helped a lot.

 

[Neostarwcc]

I am very glad you have taken my suggestion in the right spirit, Neo. There is somethig about it that strikes me as somewhat pathological - and I have had my own mental troubles, although not of that nature. So, don't beat yourself up about it, but persevere, and when you can find it in you, try to make little gestures to reassure your wife.

Harping on things in that way, sounds to this layman, as if that schizo-affective disorder could have something to do with it. You might even even consider making another appointment with the 'trick-cyclist'. Best wishes to you both anyway.

I see my psychiatrist next week about how some med changes are going. I'll bring up the argument and how it was difficult to move on then.

 

[paul becke]

I see my psychiatrist next week about how some med changes are going. I'll bring up the argument and how it was difficult to move on then.

Anyway, it's already good news, but it might be helpful, mightn't it, as he could well have the answer - for your own peace of mind... about losing your own and your wife's peace of mind in that way ?

Anyway, thanks for this update. You did seem a kind character to behave in that way. Your strange lapse, seemed out of character with the rest of your post.

 

[paul becke]

Anyway, it's already good news, but it might be helpful, mightn't it, as he could well have the answer - for your own peace of mind... about losing your own and your wife's peace of mind in that way ?

Anyway, thanks for this update. You did seem a kind character to behave in that way. Your strange lapse, seemed out of character with the rest of your post. And forgiveness is so pivotal to our faith.