No person with a little love and kindness in their hearts can live with the traditional view, only sociopaths can.
This is way too strong. There are plenty of non-sociopathic Christians who accept the traditional position.
I do wonder, however, about the vision in Rev 21:4
he will wipe every tear from their eyes.
Death will be no more;
mourning and crying and pain will be no more,
for the first things have passed away.”
if in fact people we love are being tormented eternally at the same time. Perhaps Christians will come to take the position that they’re just grateful that God rescued them, and that their loved ones who died without faith are just getting what they deserve. But I doubt many of us would feel that way if we saw something like the that happening in today’s world. That Christians would come to accept this in the New Jerusalem doesn’t seem like something good.
It also directly contradicts the vision that pain has passed away, because they are part of the “first things.” Eternal torment prolongs those first things indefinitely.
Might the author of the Revelation still have accepted that, even though I think it’s self-contradictory? Perhaps. Plenty of interpreters understand him as doing so. Some have cited 22:15 “Outside are the dogs and sorcerers and fornicators and murderers and idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices falsehood” as indicating that the rejects are still around outside the New Jerusalem.
But there’s a problem with this. 22:15 isn’t actually part of the final vision in 21, but rather is part of the epilog. That epilog is in large part an exhortation to the Christians living then. 22:14 is clearly addressed to them. So I don’t think the timeframe for 22:15 is that of the New Jerusalem.
However plenty of interpreters disagree with me, and thus by implication find the coexistence of 21:4 with eternal torment plausible. I just don’t see how.