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Would you date a convicted felon?

Discussion in 'Singles (Only*)' started by MicArmstrong, Jun 30, 2010.

  1. MicArmstrong

    MicArmstrong Newbie

    60
    +5
    Lutheran
    Private
    OK, first, a little disclaimer. I am not a convicted felon. I was thinking of another "would you marry a..." topic and this popped into my head. A felony crime can be somewhat "minor" like killing an officially protected animal (bald eagle for example) or it can be pretty serious, like armed robbery, assault, rape, etc.
     
  2. b.hopeful

    b.hopeful Sharp as a razor, soft as a prayer

    +268
    United Ch. of Christ
    Married
    US-Others
    Yes...if I truly believe that they had changed. Wise as a serpent, harmless as a dove
     
  3. Rhamiel

    Rhamiel Member of the Round Table

    +7,487
    Catholic
    Single
    hmm
    we have to look at many things
    was the conviction a correct ruleing or not? a lot of innocent people get sent to jail
    if the conviction was just then
    how much time since the conviction?
    what was the crime?
    what was the motivation?
    how has this person developed mentally, spiritualy and socialy since the felony?

    really you can not say yes or no one way
    it has to be a case by case thing
     
  4. Blank123

    Blank123 Legend

    +3,445
    Catholic
    Married

    this.
     
  5. LoveJC9

    LoveJC9 Well-Known Member

    +254
    Christian
    Single
    Yes..... Like you said there are several factors to consider, not just oh my they went to jail.
     
  6. Beauty4Ashes

    Beauty4Ashes All that I need, is a song in my heart. . .

    +1,331
    Christian
    Married
    What if I've... I mean. . . they :sorry: heh...heh... have killed people. . .

    (stutters)
     
  7. G.O.L.F

    G.O.L.F Senior Member

    +37
    Non-Denom
    Single
    UK-Labour
    Having worked on the mission field with a christan charity that rehabilitates ex prisoners, I have met many men who have been saved and completly turned there lives around. If this person was now a comitted christian man I would hve no pproblem marrying. If God has forgiven them, forgotten their sin and washed then white as snow in the blood of Jesus, who am I too judge.

    For example there wass one Pastor of our church. Hes an ex high security prisoner, but you would never know when you met him! Hes a very Godly man, happily married with two children. Do you know what his crime was?...8 counts of murder of the peeople who murdered his family!
     
  8. ulu

    ulu Senior Member

    +160
    Christian
    Single
    Depends what they had done. If it was fraud, no. Dating a known scammer would be in my case, just asking for trouble.
     
    Last edited: Jun 30, 2010
  9. NoodlesNoodlesNoodles

    NoodlesNoodlesNoodles I am a bad person.

    +542
    Christian
    Single
    Certainly. I have one non-negotiable criterion: that she be a Christian, or saved, or regenerated, or... whatever you want to call it these days. Is she? Great. Oh, a convicted felon as well? Thanks for telling me, but the choice to love is mine alone and if it were true, Christlike love it cannot be effected by anything about that person.

    Will it be something to be mindful of in the future in that marriage? Yes, but so will anything else so that seems to be a non-issue. Everyone is different and anyone I get invovled with will have their own shortcomings that I will need to rise to and fill in my own shortcomings for.

    I'd take a murderer. David was a premeditated murderer. Moses committed murder, but of the "Voluntary Manslaughter" kind (still murder, of course).

    If Christ forgives and holds fellowship with them, can I be holier than Him? Can I turn her down on spiritual grounds?

    What if she isn't quite rehabilitated? None of us left on earth are rehabilitated from sin. Christ maintains fellowship and love for us, his bride, in spite of that. Can I deny my bride what Christ gives to me in greater quantities? Oh, I can. But I'd be the more wicked of the two of us for it.

    "Ah!" some might say, "fellowship with the Lord is broken when you are still struggling with active sin!" Christ, even in the midst of sin while fellowship isn't sweet or close, does not abandon nor does he get angry and sulk or nag or make personal accusations or say "You need to get your walk together. I'm leaving and when you get it together I'll be back." He says "You need to get your walk together and I will give you the energizing, the love, the kindness and even the punishment necessary to bring you back to me because left to your own you never would."

    Not that I advocate punishing spouses in Christ's name (There is a sect that believes in spanking wives. :doh: ).


    Would I date/marry a felon? Yes. Even if she was still struggling? If I believed I could be a bolster, an edifying force for her... sure. Not to "fix" her, because only the Lord can with her cooperation. But to be a stepping stone to Him?

    I ought to be ready and willing. I imagine I could wimp out if faced with it, but I'd still be wrong for it.
     
  10. lostaquarium

    lostaquarium Quite flawed

    +343
    Christian
    Private
    Yes I would.
     
  11. GQ Chris

    GQ Chris ooey gooey is for brownies, not Bible teachers

    +1,749
    Calvinist
    Single
    Yeah, and better yet, if she's awaiting execution on death row, that's my dreamgirl!! I will write her many love letters.
     
  12. Keri

    Keri Legend

    +3,174
    Other Religion
    In Relationship
    These "would you marry" threads are getting kinda old. :sorry:
     
  13. MicArmstrong

    MicArmstrong Newbie

    60
    +5
    Lutheran
    Private
    I seriously want to know the answers to these.
     
  14. Inkachu

    Inkachu Bursting with fruit flavor!

    +3,712
    Christian
    Married
    US-Others
    I have, and would again. BUT I've got some serious requirements; I expect full, honest details about his past, and I expect him to be understanding that I would be more scrutinizing of his behavior as I get to know him. After all, a date is a potential spouse, and a spouse is a potential mother/father of your children. You'd better pick carefully.
     
  15. penNpaper

    penNpaper Forever in Your Arms

    +525
    Non-Denom
    Married
    Agreed *yawns*

    God Bless,
    Drew
     
  16. Hockey_Fan

    Hockey_Fan Man of Mystery

    +50
    Christian Seeker
    Single
    Ok, so I was convicted years ago in a case that was blown terribly out of proportion in the legal system.

    It was many years ago and I'm not even the same person today as I was then (not that I was "bad" at the time). Just goes to show how some things can be totally irrelevant.

    It's like asking whether you would marry someone who was/wasn't a virgin. I'm always far more interested in where a person is today and where they are headed than something that happened in the past.
     
  17. brinny

    brinny everlovin' shiner of light in dark places Supporter

    +83,684
    Non-Denom
    Private
    US-Constitution
    No.
     
  18. Nom De Guerre

    Nom De Guerre Who amongst you doesn't see life as permanent?

    +1,180
    Non-Denom
    Private
    Interesting choices here. I know I wouldn't, and I'd never allow myself to even consider it; but I guess some people like the 'bad boy' type and I know how things like that can be pretty glamorized. I understand the romanticism as well. I just know what it's like to be around drama, believe me; and it's far from what I want out of life. You can be as wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove to an extent before you get turned back into the same ol' person.

    I know murderers, they say it's an addiction. You don't want to know what it's like to live in their world.
     
  19. septemberskies

    septemberskies You can find me on cloud no.9

    +320
    Christian
    US-Democrat
    Honestly? No
     
  20. Gym

    Gym CF's Ruskie

    +315
    Eastern Orthodox
    Single
    No
    why?
    I'd lose my job and frankly.. if they're a felon I'm not sure I could trust the individual.. and trust to me is a VERY big thing.
     
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