Will you marry for financial stability/money?

[anewday]

My money is God's money, if she has a problem with that it's her problem. And I feel the same about her money. But she does need to be stable as in doesn't bounce checks and have uncontrolled spending habits. It's not our money it's His.

 

[Brian75]

If she has a low paying job that allows her to minister to people and be active in church I'm all for it. Money isn't everything and God PROVIDES!!!

 

[PetLuv]

Pretty much this . I also plan on working for as long as possible. Not sure I want to work if kids come into the picture, but that will be between me and him. Plus, I didn't get my master's to have somebody else take over that debt .

A good point that I failed to think of originally, I personally would love to be a stay at home mom so that likely weighs on my opinion of his maturity with finances as well.

 

[toastface_grillah]

Difficult question.

Would I reject a guy based solely on his job? Yes, because it demonstrates his level of motivation/ambition in life. If he has low motivation, then I won't want to date him, much less marry him.

So basically my answer is that I'm not looking for a sugar daddy, but I want someone who is motivated and ambitious (a self-made man).

I don't want to struggle with poverty because being poor is not fun and I don't want someone who is lazy.

Not the best way to give a guy a yes or no in this economy - working a low-end job doesn't necessarily mean you don't have the motivation/ambition to aim higher; it could mean the guy's doing what he can for now until the jobs crisis eases up. But good luck with this; I hope it works out.

 

[tahoe]

Thank you for being who you are.

:-o My rudeness? I could've said that with more grace, like Toastface, my apologies Neve

 

[Nom De Guerre]

It was the fact that you believe it with your heart that made it so nice

 

[redblue22]

As if I would be with some money-loving woman who dreams to sit on her lazy butt getting fat and says she might get a job if it were more fun than watching tv and talking on the phone to some other lazy sponge friend of hers. I'm sure there are a bunch of brainwashed conservative Christian guys who will be happy to pick up the tab though. Then when she fools around he will wonder why she didn't love and respect him when he didn't respect himself enough to ditch the gold digger.

 

[Nom De Guerre]

The women I've fallen for over the years were all well to do and wanted to see me succeed more than anything else, I don't know what I would have done without them raising me to have the high self-esteem I do now. They're the lights of my life and I love them so much...what you said reminds me of them.

 

[Neve]

Would I reject a girl based solely on her job? Yes, because it demonstrates her level of motivation/ambition in life. If she has low motivation, then I won't want to date her, much less marry her.

I want someone who is motivated and ambitious (a self-made woman). I don't want to struggle with poverty because being poor is not fun and I don't want someone who is lazy.

VERY funny....but my main point is motivation/ambition plays a big role.

And for the record, this goes for both men and women. Equal opportunity on the gender card.

 

[Rhye]

Not the best way to give a guy a yes or no in this economy - working a low-end job doesn't necessarily mean you don't have the motivation/ambition to aim higher; it could mean the guy's doing what he can for now until the jobs crisis eases up. But good luck with this; I hope it works out.

I understand you toasty so much!

I respect a man who works hard and even if its just what he can do at the moment. In my family there are a lot of hard working men who don't make a lot of money but they work very hard to take care of their families.
I want to be with someone where we can support each other and raise a family, even if we are struggling I rather be by someone side in the good and bad.

 

[K9_Trainer]

No, I can make myself financially stable and earn my own money. I don't need or want a man for that. I want a man for companionship and I would not even allow him to provide for me unless I'm somehow rendered unable to work or would be homeless if somebody didn't.

 

[Neve]

Not the best way to give a guy a yes or no in this economy - working a low-end job doesn't necessarily mean you don't have the motivation/ambition to aim higher; it could mean the guy's doing what he can for now until the jobs crisis eases up. But good luck with this; I hope it works out.

Isn't there always a job crisis in the U.S.? That is not an excuse to not have goals in life.

My sister briefly dated a coal miner. She really liked him, but she readily agreed with me when I told her that he wasn't an appropriate match (based on their differences in education/socioeconomic background/occupation). Sure, a girl or guy can go slumming if they want, but if you think a good marriage will be made from it, then you are delusional. Large disparities between partners will usually led to marital problems down the road.

Note: I have nothing against coal miners. My great-grandfather mined coal for a living. I am merely stating what can be backed up with statistics regarding marriage. Additionally, I interned with a Family Court Judge so I know the red flags for divorce.

 

[MehGuy]

Just make sure you're pretty enough to get a high earner...

This may sound old fashioned, but I would have a hard time if my wife made significantly more money than I did. I hope to someday make more than enough money for myself. I'd love to be able to spoil my wife and give her the easy life.

 

[redblue22]

Isn't there always a job crisis in the U.S.? That is not an excuse to not have goals in life.

My sister briefly dated a coal miner. She really liked him, but she readily agreed with me when I told her that he wasn't an appropriate match (based on their differences in education/socioeconomic background/occupation). Sure, a girl or guy can go slumming if they want, but if you think a good marriage will be made from it, then you are delusional. Large disparities between partners will usually led to marital problems down the road.

Note: I have nothing against coal miners. My great-grandfather mined coal for a living. I am merely stating what can be backed up with statistics regarding marriage. Additionally, I interned with a Family Court Judge so I know the red flags for divorce.

ah yes, slumming.

 

[Nom De Guerre]

I thank to the high Heavens God doesn't see us this way. I was a poor boy, from a poor family...Mama Mia, Mama Mia...

Anyway haha I gained so much respect from a lot of wealthy and influential people because I was both genuine and filled with His grace. They also respected me because the weak-minded search for others to pay their way. I believe in Egalitarianism, and that no matter where you come from you can reach the sun through the concrete, as it were

 

[Neve]

ah yes, slumming.

Now I feel like my life is a scene out of "Dirty Dancing."

 

[tahoe]

Isn't there always a job crisis in the U.S.? That is not an excuse to not have goals in life.

My sister briefly dated a coal miner. She really liked him, but she readily agreed with me when I told her that he wasn't an appropriate match (based on their differences in education/socioeconomic background/occupation). Sure, a girl or guy can go slumming if they want, but if you think a good marriage will be made from it, then you are delusional. Large disparities between partners will usually led to marital problems down the road.

Note: I have nothing against coal miners. My great-grandfather mined coal for a living. I am merely stating what can be backed up with statistics regarding marriage. Additionally, I interned with a Family Court Judge so I know the red flags for divorce.

IDK Neve, total honesty here; I'd rather marry a guy who works at a gas station - that is sound of character and has integrity than marry a guy for his bank account. Chalk it up to different values I guess?

 

[tahoe]

Now I feel like my life is a scene out of "Dirty Dancing."

Lol!! No body puts baby in the corner

 

[Neve]

IDK Neve, total honesty here; I'd rather marry a guy who works at a gas station - that is sound of character and has integrity than marry a guy for his bank account. Chalk it up to different values I guess?

Why do you assume that a man with money or motivation has no character or integrity?

I've met lots of wealthy guys who are honest and hardworking (and I've met wealthy guys who are unscrupulous).

 

[Nom De Guerre]

Why do you assume that a man with money or motivation has no character or integrity?

I've met lots of wealthy guys who are honest and hardworking (and I've met wealthy guys who are unscrupulous).

Probably the same reason you assume those without money aren't rich haha