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Why aren't you happy...

Discussion in 'Oncology (Cancer Support)' started by Stabat Mater, May 15, 2017.

  1. Stabat Mater

    Stabat Mater Jesus Christ conquers! Supporter

    +6,817
    Holy See (vatican City State)
    Traditional. Cath.
    Single
    What's wrong?
    Why ain't you grateful that you've been healed?

    This is some questions I have faced already in my few days as cancerfree.
    People seem to forget fatigue and the mental terror cancer patients and recovering cancer survivors have gone through and still does.

    How can I be so so excited?
    Am I glad I'm not dying? Of course.
    But I'm not the same person anymore, im full of anxiety and pain.

    Im so afraid that the cancer may come back, I'm afraid of dying.
    The bizarre thing is that I'm afraid of living again too.

    Hmm, it's a very complex and weird state if mind.
    I'm suffering still :(
     
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  2. Far Side Of the Moon

    Far Side Of the Moon " The moon is high& the stars are aligned" :)

    +2,876
    United States
    Christian
    Single
    US-Democrat
    Life doesn't come with a manual and even being a christian is hard..

    That's all I have to say because I'm struggling as well.
     
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  3. Saint Beloved

    Saint Beloved Well-Known Member Supporter

    534
    +672
    United Kingdom
    Anabaptist
    Private
    You're right, living is complex, we are complex.
    Suffering is a part of life it's a side effect of the original sin, as is death. Death isn't something to be feared now that we're One with Christ - He has conquered death it's lost it's sting! The second we die we are safe with Him and no other pain can touch us. Try to make your peace with death, to greet it as a friend, a release, into the hands of our Saviour. Pray about it ask God to give you courage and we'll pray for you too.

    Don't worry or waste energy on other people's reactions or questions, they're not walking in your shoes, just allow yourself to feel the spectrum of emotions in there own time and not question conformity to expectations.

    God bless you. :)
     
  4. Stabat Mater

    Stabat Mater Jesus Christ conquers! Supporter

    +6,817
    Holy See (vatican City State)
    Traditional. Cath.
    Single
    I don't fear death per se, I was close to death at one point and even got anointed.
    I remember that semi conscious I had peace at heart.
    God however had a different plan for me than to leave so soon.

    I'm not so much afraid of death as I'm afraid of waking up in Gehenna.
    Am I a sheep or a goat?

    I pray that God grants me purgatory when I die. I can wait for a eternity as long as I know I'll be resurrected at the final day.
     
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