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bèlla

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Ha ha, I proposed after we'd known each other less than a week.

I obliged her, because I was like let's go...let's take the land in faith, but she turned back.

I’m not surprised given the duration. She may have been genuine but swept up in the moment. It’s likely she had others telling her to slow down. Few would say differently.

No need to say more than is comfortable. :)

Admittedly, I’ve had suitors make similar declarations. Not marriage though at that point. It feels good. You want to believe they’re sincere. But it’s easy to get carried away.

Someone I dated in my twenties was like that. Utter certainty. It felt a little overbearing. But I cared for them. However the one who followed was the opposite. Certain but grounded. I prefer that more.

Dancing in the heavens is wonderful. But the crash hurts bad.
 
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Tone

"Whenever Thou humblest me, Thou makest me great."
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I’m not surprised given the duration. She may have been genuine but swept up in the moment. It’s likely she had others telling her to slow down. Few would say differently.

No need to say more than is comfortable. :)

Admittedly, I’ve had suitors make similar declarations. Not marriage though at that point. It feels good. You want to believe they’re sincere. But it’s easy to get carried away.

Someone I dated in my twenties was like that. Utter certainty. It felt a little overbearing. But I cared for them. However the one who followed was the opposite. Certain but grounded. I prefer that more.

Dancing in the heavens is wonderful. But the crash hurts bad.



I haven't crashed.

Her loss.
 
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Tone

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A marriage will have hiccups, setbacks, and problems regardless.

Let's get married as we agreed to and grow organically.


Let Him grow us as we look to Him...not the naysayers.
 
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bèlla

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Did I honestly expect her to follow through with her oath, that was witnessed by others?!

Yes.

Given the tenure of your connection—oath notwithstanding—it isn’t odd she didn’t. Most people don’t marry someone they’ve known a week.

It’s possible you could have reached that place with more time together and less pressure to tie the knot.

Do you have trusted friends and family who aid you with vetting?
 
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bèlla

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Let Him grow us as we look to Him...not the naysayers.

This is the part about Christian relationships that troubles me. They’ve discarded a lot of sensible practices. It makes me leery of marriage.
 
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Tone

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Given the tenure of your connection—oath notwithstanding—it isn’t odd she didn’t. Most people don’t marry someone they’ve known a week.

It’s possible you could have reached that place with more time together and less pressure to tie the knot.

Do you have trusted friends and family who aid you with vetting?


The connection was Spiritual and it was undeniable. I believe this is why she did reach out again, but by then the lump was leavened.
 
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bèlla

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A marriage will have hiccups, setbacks, and problems regardless.

Let's get married as we agreed to and grow organically.

I couldn’t bring him home. My family would hit the roof. Rightfully so. One week is too soon in my opinion. But fine for others I suppose.
 
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Tone

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This is the part about Christian relationships that troubles me. They’ve discarded a lot of sensible practices. It makes me leery of marriage.

We're both Messianics...the christianese was the leaven.

The "sensible practices" you speak of are all up in the church.
 
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Tone

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I couldn’t bring him home. My family would hit the roof. Rightfully so. One week is too soon in my opinion. But fine for others I suppose.

It's in His Hands, He may have a woman fit for me.
 
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bèlla

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We're both Messianics...the christianese was the leaven.

The "sensible practices" you speak of are all up in the church.

I’m not referencing Christian practices in that statement. I wasn’t reared in that culture. My family loved the Lord but they were wise and prudent.

If you want someone who throws caution to the wind you need to make sure that’s really the case and not lip speak.
 
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Tone

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I’m not referencing Christian practices in that statement. I wasn’t reared in that culture. My family loved the Lord but they were wise and prudent.

If you want someone who throws caution to the wind you need to make sure that’s really the case and not lip speak.


Yeah, I want someone who will throw caution to the Ruach ha Kodesh.
 
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bèlla

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Well then, hopefully she learned something for her next encounter.

She was engaged twice before.

It sounds like both of you jumped the gun. If it’s real taking your time isn’t a problem. There’s no need to rush.
 
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Tone

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I've not been shown on a Biblical/Spiritual level that my approach is in error.

If anything it has served as a great "vetting" tool.

The one who says yes and looks to Him to make her yes...yes...will be my wife.

And we'll be blessed to live, learn, and grow together.
 
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