What's on your mind?

[bèlla]

We went to the farmers market this morning and were met with a surprise. Migrants were seated near the entrance asking for help. I was taken aback momentarily and went about my business. Greeting familiar faces and picking up the things we needed for the week. As we made our way around I noticed the same at the side entrances and exit too.

By that point I was honestly annoyed by the indignity and hypocrisy of their permissiveness. They've never permitted the same otherwise. Licensed performers were allowed in a specific area and I've seen merchants blessing the needy too. But at no point was begging allowed.

I didn't address it at the time and I'll have to pray before doing so. I don't want to appear unkind but it's hard to ignore. The market is located in an affluent area as is another we frequent and they're stricter than the others. This is the largest of the bunch and most profitable. Their unwillingness to do the same for local citizens is disconcerting.

 

[SarahsKnight]

What a pity. It appears actor Martin Mull died at 80 years old just a couple of days ago.

I knew him best as Colonel Mustard in that movie Clue.

 

[.Mikha'el.]

What a pity. It appears actor Martin Mull died at 80 years old just a couple of days ago.

I knew him best as Colonel Mustard in that movie Clue.

View attachment 350880

I heard about this yesterday. It's really too bad.

 

[bèlla]

@exitstageright

I was preparing a post when the thread was closed and wanted to ask a question. What height range is most to your liking? If you have a weight in mind please acknowledge it. I veer on the slimmer side and it's best to ask. -)

 

[bèlla]

A couple of hours ago a member of this community made an allegation they would not recant and doubled down on their position. Differences notwithstanding, accusing a Christian of treating sin as nothing is a serious charge and shouldn't be levied haphazardly.

In response, I will stand against the allegation in prayer. Long term members are aware I've done the same beyond the seven year mark without fatigue in different scenarios. While our conclusions may differ it's important we don't malign one another's walk with the Lord inconsiderately.

I'm not requesting your involvement. Rest assured I can handle it until my name has been cleared. But for the sake of transparency I'm making you aware of the situation and my intentions. To God be the glory.

~bella

 

[exitstageright]

@exitstageright

I was preparing a post when the thread was closed and wanted to ask a question. What height range is most to your liking? If you have a weight in mind please acknowledge it. I veer on the slimmer side and it's best to ask. -)

The height range to my liking is 5 feet,2 inches. The weight range for my liking is 105 to 150 pounds. By my thread being shut down, I guess that I am not allowed to express myself. I have had hurt feelings. But,I expressed my hurt feelings in a social able acceptable manner. I did no physical harm to anyone and/or to myself. And, some people wonder why men, in general hide their feelings. It is because when a man says something, about his feelings, it is misinterpreted and it is always wrong.

 

[bèlla]

The height range to my liking is 5 feet,2 inches. The weight range for my liking is 105 to 150 pounds. By my thread being shut down, I guess that I am not allowed to express myself. I have had hurt feelings. But,I expressed my hurt feelings in a social able acceptable manner. I did no physical harm to anyone and/or to myself. And, some people wonder why men, in general hide their feelings. It is because when a man says something, it is always wrong.

Thank you for answering.

You made a mistake and there's no one within this space who hasn't done the same. But we weren't privy to the error. That's the difference. In my estimation, if you intended to go forward we would not have heard about it until it happened. Which attests to the Lord's involvement and your willingness for restraint.

I've been abstinent significantly longer than my reconciliation with the Father. In 33 years I've had one partner and not another. While others have married, divorced and fornicated. Rest in the fullness of the Father and don't permit anyone to shake the trust you've gained. We're all imperfect specimens.

 

[Tranquil Bondservant]

A couple of hours ago a member of this community made an allegation they would not recant and doubled down on their position. Differences notwithstanding, accusing a Christian of treating sin as nothing is a serious charge and shouldn't be levied haphazardly.

In response, I will stand against the allegation in prayer. Long term members are aware I've done the same beyond the seven year mark without fatigue in different scenarios. While our conclusions may differ it's important we don't malign one another's walk with the Lord inconsiderately.

I'm not requesting your involvement. Rest assured I can handle it until my name has been cleared. But for the sake of transparency I'm making you aware of the situation and my intentions. To God be the glory.

~bella

It wasn't done haphazardly, it was done with a solid argument with something you never responded to. You had the opportunity to refute the proof that you asked for multiple times. I didn't recant because you didn't really provide me with a reason to. Christ doesn't look upon someone deceiving His children for the purpose of gratifying the lusts of their flesh as something which isn't dangerous, and neither should we (or you). I'm not maligning you, it's okay if you made a mistake, I'm not judging you at all; but I also don't back down from what I've said because from what you had written it did sound like you were treating the sin which was being talked about as if it was nothing. As something that shouldn't be called out for the wickedness that it was. Seriously, the man wanted to hire an escort to deceive women at church to go out with him. How do you think the Apostle Paul would react to that?

If anyone would like to see the exchange then please feel free to visit the thread and decide for yourselves.
It wasn't haphazard and it was said for a reason.

The Friend Zone

It is ironic that you mentioned bells and whistles. Around 1991,in Bakersfield,California, one lady, who went to the same church as I, told me after our first date. "S..... when I went out with you, no bells went off." :cool: She's been watching too many films. ;) The secret to women is...

www.christianforums.com

For the sake of transparency here are the actual links to the thread. God bless .

"For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?" -2 Corinthians 6:14

 

[bèlla]

It wasn't done haphazardly, it was done with a solid argument with something you never responded to. You had the opportunity to refute the proof that you asked for multiple times.

I've asked you to stop messaging me and this is the second occurrence which violates the terms of the site. You weren't quoted in my post. Knock it off.

 

[Tranquil Bondservant]

I've asked you to stop messaging me and this is the second occurrence which violates the terms of the site.

But you were the one who wrote about me? I'm sorry I'm rather confused. Just because you didn't mention me by name doesn't mean you weren't talking about me or what I said, that doesn't seem fair. And I haven't messaged you, I've responded to you on a public forum. Not only that, I responded to something which you said that had to do with me in particular.

 

[exitstageright]

It wasn't done haphazardly, it was done with a solid argument with something you never responded to. You had the opportunity to refute the proof that you asked for multiple times. I didn't recant because you didn't really provide me with a reason to. Christ doesn't look upon someone deceiving His children for the purpose of gratifying the lusts of their flesh as something which isn't dangerous, and neither should we (or you). I'm not maligning you, it's okay if you made a mistake, I'm not judging you at all; but I also don't back down from what I've said because from what you had written it did sound like you were treating the sin which was being talked about as if it was nothing. As something that shouldn't be called out for the wickedness that it was. Seriously, the man wanted to hire an escort to deceive women at church to go out with him. How do you think the Apostle Paul would react to that?

If anyone would like to see the exchange then please feel free to visit the thread and decide for yourselves.
It wasn't haphazard and it was said for a reason.

The Friend Zone

It is ironic that you mentioned bells and whistles. Around 1991,in Bakersfield,California, one lady, who went to the same church as I, told me after our first date. "S..... when I went out with you, no bells went off." :cool: She's been watching too many films. ;) The secret to women is...

www.christianforums.com

For the sake of transparency here are the actual links to the thread. God bless .

"For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?" -2 Corinthians 6:14

But,I did not commit any sin of deceiving anyone at my church. I did not hire an escort. Therefore, there is no need for repentance. I came up with the idea because I was desperate. And, desperate situations sometimes cause desperate actions to occur. I did say that I was not going to go through with this plan. Maybe you overread that part. I was just writing down my feelings at the time. And,we all know how feelings can be illogical at times. Is it ok for a man to express his feelings,also?

 

[bèlla]

Now that the mods are involved it's best to allow them to handle it.

 

[Tranquil Bondservant]

But,I did not commit sin of deceiving anyone at my church. I did not hire an escort. Therefore, there is no need for repentance. I came up with the idea because I was desperate. And, desperate situations sometimes cause desperate actions to occur. I did say that I was not going to go through with this plan. Maybe you overread that part. I was just writing down my feelings at the time. And,we all know how feelings can be illogical at times. Is it ok for a man to express his feelings,also?

Mate all you said was "By the way, I have given up on the idea of hiring an escort.". Given the multitude of your previous responses being perfectly okay with lying to people and also defending hiring an escort to take to church, it was rather ambiguous whether or not that was repentance or if it just meant that for this current moment you had given up on it. Also because you said that in response to my initial comment, before I said something you didn't give any indication that you had changed your mind regarding it so there was no way I could have known, I could only have gone by what I read. Additionally because of the times you justified lying it made it even harder to see your statement about giving up on your scheme as repentance and not just the fact you gave up, for example:
"What do you think of the saying,"A man, who does not lie to a woman, does not deserve her" In romance, in order to be successful, a man has to tell a woman things that she wants to hear. And, sometimes that is not always the truth."
"Well,women are deceivers also." What's good for the goose, is good for the gander"

Also you did commit sin, this wasn't just a thought or temptation, you went out of your way to defend lying, hiring escorts and you defended sinfully deceiving women in order to get with them. Defending sinful actions, actions which actively harm your sisters in Christ, is not just "temptation", it's actively working against Christ by defending wickedness. Repeatedly, even after you had been rebuked by other people. If you have genuinely repented for these things then I have absolutely no issue with you mate and I wish you the best with all of my heart in Christ. Up until you initially responded to me you gave absolutely no indication that you had decided not to go through with your plan, and even then it was ambiguous to say the least (especially when you mentioned the motive of getting revenge against innocent people).

God bless.

 

[LoveDivine]

But,I did not commit any sin of deceiving anyone at my church. I did not hire an escort. Therefore, there is no need for repentance. I came up with the idea because I was desperate. And, desperate situations sometimes cause desperate actions to occur. I did say that I was not going to go through with this plan. Maybe you overread that part. I was just writing down my feelings at the time. And,we all know how feelings can be illogical at times. Is it ok for a man to express his feelings,also?

Let's be serious here, you said a lot of nasty things about women in that thread and why women deserved deception. And now you are bringing this to another thread to justify it. That discussion could have been left alone in the original thread. Others who responded to you there commented directly on what you said. That's fair. You were free to express yourself and others were free to respond. That's how these discussions work. Maybe you were feeling hurt and desperate, but you were not simply venting. You asked for feedback for the scheme you had concocted. That's why you got such strong responses. It wasn't just pushback to your original idea either.

The pushback continued because of the many unpleasant things you posted subsequently to justify the scheme. It is concerning to read that women deserve to be lied to. That opinion will earn negative responses on a secular or Christian forum. It's very misogynist. Let's be honest about that thread. That was more than just a man expressing his feelings of frustration. It crossed a line. You wanted feedback on your plans and you got it, lol

It also required more from you to end the discussion than a simple " I'm not going to do it now." You expressed a lot of indefensible opinions about disrespecting women and you never retracted any of them. So why would others give you a pass ? Stop making this into a pity party about how you can't share your feelings. You shared a scheme not feelings. Let's keep that straight.

Edit:

Would you be so easy on another man who had designs on deceiving your female relative? It's all okay until some other man disrespects your wife, sister, mother, daughter, etc. Men usually change their opinions very quickly when someone treats their loved one like that. Just a thought

 

[bèlla]

But,I did not commit any sin of deceiving anyone at my church. I did not hire an escort. Therefore, there is no need for repentance. I came up with the idea because I was desperate.

You were hurt because of your experiences. This is an example of the inequity that exists in our culture in relation to this suspect. As a man you're expected to get over it. You're not allowed to express your frustration too much without being accused of sour grapes. You're not permitted to say you were treated unfairly barring terrible situations. You're supposed to move on.

But women don't have the same restrictions. They can play the sympathy card and reframe the experience to their advantage and few will question it. They can call the other party shallow and the conversation ends immediately. No one's going to ask what she meant or acknowledge the other's right to their choice. You'd be hard pressed to see her held to the fire when mistakes are made to the degree men are.

Rejection is uncomfortable and you aren't the first person who had a knee jerk reaction about their experience. Women can be equally spiteful and make similar remarks in the company of friends. This would have unfolded differently in a religious setting. The comment would have been addressed but no one would have called you dangerous. It veers too close to typecasting and would have to be substantiated with significant acts that confirm it.

Don't dwell on this too much. You've learned from your mistake and will choose differently next time.

~bella

 

[Will Joseph]

I wonder how busy my Monday will be.

 

[TheLastGeek]

But,I did not commit any sin of deceiving anyone at my church. I did not hire an escort. Therefore, there is no need for repentance. I came up with the idea because I was desperate. And, desperate situations sometimes cause desperate actions to occur. I did say that I was not going to go through with this plan. Maybe you overread that part. I was just writing down my feelings at the time. And,we all know how feelings can be illogical at times. Is it ok for a man to express his feelings,also?

It is, indeed, okay to express your feelings. But you need to be ready and able to receive honest feedback from others, since you're sharing them on a public form. And some of that feedback won't be things you want to hear. You need to be able to hear what's being said without defaulting to feeling attacked. No one here hates you. No one here is trying to ruin your day or hurt you. You gave us a situation and story voluntarily, and we gave you our honest thoughts about it. It's a good policy not to share personal things online if you aren't ready to receive both positive and negative reactions to it. You can't police or censor other peoples' opinions.

 

[GodDoesListen55]

I still really dislike thunderstorms.

 

[SarahsKnight]

I still really dislike thunderstorms.

It will be over soon enough, Miss Chelsea.

 

[exitstageright]

Let's be serious here, you said a lot of nasty things about women in that thread and why women deserved deception. And now you are bringing this to another thread to justify it. That discussion could have been left alone in the original thread. Others who responded to you there commented directly on what you said. That's fair. You were free to express yourself and others were free to respond. That's how these discussions work. Maybe you were feeling hurt and desperate, but you were not simply venting. You asked for feedback for the scheme you had concocted. That's why you got such strong responses. It wasn't just pushback to your original idea either.

The pushback continued because of the many unpleasant things you posted subsequently to justify the scheme. It is concerning to read that women deserve to be lied to. That opinion will earn negative responses on a secular or Christian forum. It's very misogynist. Let's be honest about that thread. That was more than just a man expressing his feelings of frustration. It crossed a line. You wanted feedback on your plans and you got it, lol

It also required more from you to end the discussion than a simple " I'm not going to do it now." You expressed a lot of indefensible opinions about disrespecting women and you never retracted any of them. So why would others give you a pass ? Stop making this into a pity party about how you can't share your feelings. You shared a scheme not feelings. Let's keep that straight.

Edit:

Would you be so easy on another man who had designs on deceiving your female relative? It's all okay until some other man disrespects your wife, sister, mother, daughter, etc. Men usually change their opinions very quickly when someone treats their loved one like that. Just a thought

I only said nasty things about the women who have mistreated me. Not all women,that I have met, have mistreated me. I just call them as I see them. There is a saying, "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade." Well traveling,especially cruising, is my lemonade. I plan to go on a cruise in 58 days from today. I will just enjoy my life on my own.
Take care