As can be readily demonstrated, there are so many definitions running around that the definitions are indeed clearly misunderstood -- we can say that generally because it's generally true, and we can say that specifically because it's obviously true in most particulars that attempt to describe Calvinism from outside its group.
I generally point people to "The Reformed Doctrine of Predestination" by Loraine Boettner if they want to get a better handle on the items of the Five Points of Calvinism.
Reformed theology itself is a broad subject. Some elements of Scripture have been examined in excruciating detail. "The Imputation of Adam's Sin" (Murray) is a short book on exegesis and interpretation of a wildly shorter phrase. Meanwhile, "The Christ of the Covenants" (Robertson) is a fairly long & detailed book on how covenants interact in Scripture.
They are both drenched in the Biblical-Historical method that Vos made so prominent, and I vaguely remember Murray only described the different situations in Reformed thought and how they emerged with the conclusion of immediate imputation. In other words -- want to challenge something? Murray's briefly described the what's & how's that led Reformed thinkers where they are.
For even greater depth, I'd probably recommend Charles Hodge. He's readable, at least as far as 19th century writers go, and he gets in enough depth while also being fairly irenic, at least with other Protestants.
At this point claiming "no you're not providing definitions" is something of a mistake. We've already discussed Calvinism's
lack of change to the meanings of words it sets down. We've also been accused of such in the particulars of
some passages.
And now I've explained why it's not tenable to "just give one definition". It's because words themselves can be shifted in meaning, just like the original words. We can explain how those meanings shifted over time, or even in some instances how Reformed thought shifted away from ideas it once thought plausible, but now no more. But we can't define things statically. Language isn't static.
