Thoughts ...

[x141]

On the notion of the inevitable one world government … when it arrives in us, then it will arrive; outside of this, only leads to folly.

 

[Noxot]

I know how to make one government. first you destroy all governments. then there is one government left. but to destroy them all you have to destroy all evil and be reunited to God. then we shall be true being... rather than potential being in flux of existing and not existing.

I will call this established being "true humanity" as opposed to what it is atm - "shadow of humanity".

once you step over to the other side you see humanity. if you stay in the shadows there is madness and vanity with sparks of life here and there... like stars in a big black void. but shadow of humanity and true light of humanity are aspects of the same truth of beauty and love and all goodness. but it is not good for man to be alone.

 

[x141]

Early on in my journey I was told by our Father that if I got rid of everything that was not him, he would be the only thing left; and to feel alone in a room full of people is a testament to the fractured soul of God.

 

[Noxot]

and yet it is only a veil and a means to love therein. blindness to something affords expressions of love just like seeing something does. the stage does not matter. only the divine heart of God matters and our own heart does matter too because God is the one who births us.

so feeling alone is just as valid as feeling a deep connection with everyone.

I mean, if there is evil we can cling to God. if there is good then we can cling to God. I want everyone to be happy... to have the best for all. but I can't force them to be me because if I did then they would not be themselves. sure... I can give them a cup of water and they always give me things too but if i can not love them for who they are and love them in the sense that i give them my own love as well, then i do not really love them but I only love myself. and I want them to love me too... but not by force but because they love. that is why me being me is vastly important to God. and God being God is vastly important and everyone being themselves is vastly important.

sure... sometimes people are not themselves but even in that they show who they are in some respect. it's not good to forever dwell in a bad infinity of birthing and dying and that is not Gods purpose at all... but it is a little bit of the eternal picture. it is what would be if Father did not love us as he loves his only Son. but that fuller expression of God is the entire Trinity, not just the revelation of the Father or the Son but that of the Holy Spirit as well...

and that paints the correct picture of Gods heart clearer than just knowing God 1/3 or 2/3 which ofc if you have only revelation of the Father and the Son then you get that infamous .666666666666666666666

even though all is summed up by one or 1/3 which makes that .33333333333333333333

so the 3/3 is 1 and adding up in a different way you get that infinite .9999999999999999999 which ofc this comforting .99999999999 and that 100% are the same completeness and eternal expression just like the Trinity is God just like God is God for in him there is that ever at rest and ever moving.

 

[Noxot]

but there is no real process. there is only God and in him we live and rejoice and he rejoices in us. if the dear Lord broke a glass then he is still unchangingly beloved, for what else could he be but loved if he wanted love? it is what he is and what he always was.... for perceptions in a reality created by him do not define him but they live in him. but he wants free love and his love is free and this is the truth: that he made us free and that he loves us and that he wants us to love him.

 

[Noxot]

all feelings are different when the love of God is in them. those painful feelings in my past comes back but I want them back because I want to give them to God. I feel like i'm suffocating, like i'm going to throw up, like I want to cry but I can't. i'm anxious but it is towards God. if that is what is part of me I have to love God with them. my desires and wants have to be refocused on him alone. my confusion must belong to him. maybe they will be destroyed, maybe they will not.... but I want to be with God. if I have want then it is want for God. anything can stay as long as it can endure God, as long as I am with God and God is with me.

but still it is better to not be involved with all kinds of things... if they are not needed... to be with God is the utmost of importance in this life. to be with his heart. other things are secondary, are inconsequential. it does not mean that people are not important... seeing as they are very important to God. and if I don't love people then i am found to not be loving God. but I can't love other people like I love God. how is that possible? but I can love them for who they are in God whether they are currently that or not. I can love them in hope. but I can't worship people. I don't feel negative emotions because of other people. they might be my friend and help me to trigger them so that I can love God in those negative things, but I don't want to be in negativity for any other reason than to be with God. I also don't want to make anyone here negative or do evil to you. but in me, it does not matter, I experience evils sometimes. it can torment me but I want God. I don't want the evil, I want God. I try to make a distinction between 'what i want' and God and this is harder to do but God will save me. I want to only want God. I do not want the pleasure that comes about because of God but I want God himself who is my pleasure.

or like that low impulse of attraction to whatever, like for instance women. why should I be such a fool and give that away to someone else? poor flesh, you must not be this way. you have to love God with it. it is not right that this fallen flesh be confused and love in such a low way if you want to be with the one that you belong to. so then if I feel attraction towards another person I have to do what is appropriate with it towards God as God would see fit because I must belong to him.


so now I look to love God in things and this soul, this me that was brought up in the world... it plays a game that it played in the past or it is attracted to a certain game and so I play it. and I see God in it and the truth. and whatever kind of forms I experience, they must be with God. but I can not be attached to things, I don't want to be attached to things. I just want to see God and not another. and to reconfigure my flesh so that it belongs to God alone rather than existing in this world of blindness. and if God does not reconfigure me then i must be in this messed up state towards him, for he alone is my life, unless I forget him again which if I do I want to remember him again. but my soul has to not be lead by the body. the soul has to be of itself and being of itself, being free, it will be with God for that is the spirits desire, to be with God.

but we have to all walk with God. we can not follow another. they may give us things we need but it is God alone who does the good to all of us. I can make people stumble with my words even though that is not my desire. but even if there is much conflict in me, it is all towards the Lord, it has to be. if there is peace then I must be with God with that too. if there are annoying things my body has to do to keep supporting itself to exist in this world like working for food and shelter then I have to do that too, even though i want no part of it but only to be with God. so i try not to focus when i work, I try to be with God because otherwise things of this world are torturous. or playing a game and having fun is a sick disease if i'm not in the spirit.

and since I live in dallas I hope that maybe the ebola will kill me but I don't want it to kill other people. so it does not matter if I am in weakness or in strength but what matters is that God is good and that he alone shall save his people in the way that he desires.

 

[Noxot]

so then at times I am finding myself experimenting how I can shape myself towards God. it is not that I want to lose my humanity but I want to be real humanity and real humanity is in the very image of God. and i find it a struggle while in this world of confusion to love God in it because the focus of the world is not like mine desire. if everyone on the earth died my only task would be to die. but I can't just go around being a saint to people if this indeed is not the correct manner in which I am to be with God. and how can I say I will do this or I will do that when in reality I need to be close to God so we can work together the works we wanted to work, rather than me acting like some person that knows what God wants and then trying of my own to do those things. I understand that can be good but I need to be closer to God. and then I hate all the little contradictions because I am tempted to shut up about God because i'm talking about God and it would would appear that I am speaking of myself and how good I am towards God when in reality I don't like that feeling at all but rather I just wish people would concern themselves with his heart rather than this world. and so it does not matter if i'm being strange right now or if I type to many words because i'm only doing this for one reason and I don't want people to love anything I say but to just love God because only he is our life and only he makes us complete and it is only by he that we even love our children or anyone at all.

so then there is that contradiction between "stop typing so many words" and " I will type a few words" because I want to be with God but I don't know how to make people understand that 'what does anything matter without God?'

so seek you the Lord and all things will be added to you.

 

[x141]

Obedience is at the cost of everything (not physical things) every thought, and not holding on to even one; in this is the ever increasing kingdom that is only hindered by taking thought, the turning inward so complete that it becomes the walk/worship of spirit) and of truth) as the place you remain in. It is not to be found any where’s outside of self though this path makes all others freely to travel in, or put another way, to eat of (pasture/table/kingdom). In this our judgment is taken away, our seas no more, our waters having been stilled.

It is a cup every son drinks of to become a son.

It is the cup of God.

 

[x141]

I searched for the words, and when I ended my search, they freely came to me; in the end, it was not about the words, but the self that we enter into as the Word.

 

[Noxot]

the real self is free and thus obedience seems like a contradiction. freedom, rebellion, obedience... they can all come from above or from below. it is not only that humans have a problem with the way their soul reasons but it is how their soul developed in this world that helps to keep them in chains.

some people don't believe that people will change when we reason with them. some people believe that human brains are 'hardwired'... and that their brain did not develop fully enough to be able to be the best that they can be in this world.

but now after listening to an atheistic philosopher who is a good person I started to see WHY Jesus did what he did, came as he did... WHY God allowed his own religion to develop as it did.

it is true that God does have to stoop to our level... that he will use whatever tools available to reach us and this is done without taking our own freedom away. even if having our own blind freedom means we keep ourselves trapped in a pit... it is THAT important. if we seek God then we will find him but I think most people just don't seek him enough. they stop so quickly after they think they find him.

the prophets tried very hard to have nothing to do with the world. that is why they became what they are. it is easier to worship a hero than it is to be a hero.

we have to be free or we will never be free. people can change but change only happens when they grow spiritually. there is a development of the human on other levels too....

but if the little spark in us does not grow then we shall reap what we sow. everything is done for the little spark of the person. even that great sacrifice of the possibility of evil is done for this little spark and his free likeness to God. love has to be real and free.

 

[Noxot]

there is no system to the spiritual life. there are things one might do to be with God but if you turn it into a system then it becomes hero worship. right now I don't know anything. there is something higher in humanity. most people are dwelling in the lower aspects of self. they don't even know they have a spirit. they have no clue who they are. their soul is very confused because of this.

it is certainly a disconnect. truly the image of humanity has been scattered and lost. when they have been found they will know it. but now it is fun having a soul. now I understand that i'm going through an certain kind of experience in this world. most people are so lost in this world, they believe this place is a real place compared to the reality of the kingdom of God, which to them is something to come ( or a fantasy if you are an atheist). it's right here. it has always been here and it will always be here.

the soul and the flesh commit adultery against the spirit that is in God... the spirit that can never be taken out of Gods hands. i'm not saying a bunch of words that i don't know. I experience the reality of why people are the way they are. it is not theoretical. it is the truth. people are far too attached to certain things and thus they neglect God and they neglect themselves.

but the process of salvation and walking with God makes this world worth existing in.

 

[Noxot]

it is a hard process to explain. the soul is completely fine just as much as it is completely wrong. there is no authority in the kingdom of heaven. "authority" is the idea of a madman, of someone who is sick with sin.

x141... you explain it in different terms that make sense to me. but if a person was to just use part of himself, such as his little fragment of his soul to understand, without being in the spirit, then i don't know how he would be able to understand. but the soul is a little fragment of his spirit. the soul is one part of the person. but the word 'soul' in christian terms ( i speak of those in fellowship in the spirit ) has a feeling of "coldness" about it as opposed to "mind" which is a hotness. there are those who are the mind of Christ, such as the prophets and the apostles. then there is that lower part of the self that is their body, that part of them that is part of this objective world, their flesh. those who are like sheep, beast indeed and they don't reason very well but they have a kind of nature preferable to Christ in that they have a kind of innocence... although ignorance to them. and those are parts of Christ flesh.

the shepherd has more dignity than his sheep. but also it must be noted that the baby child has everything even though he is not fully mature in the spirit yet. the fleshly people in this world are spiritual babes. thus at the very least all humans are spiritual babes. some people are more connected to God by not knowing God in that kind of superficial, soulish acknowledgement of saying " I see..." and so your sin remains...

the flesh is that first adam that fell and sinned. it is mythology, not history. but humans don't even have an spiritual understanding of the word "mythology" because they are so saturated in the world.

 

[Noxot]

I don't think that people even understand what they are doing when they do what they do. they are just brains with programming to some degree. they are products of what is outside of themselves. that is not the entire story and it would be quite the blaspheme against God if it was only that. inside there is a real battle of spirit vs slavery. inside there is a completely sane person that has to fight an beast, that has to fight a computer/machine that has to fight against everything that would take their real humanity away.

the tail is good but it does not think very well compared to the mind. want trouble? first build you a tiny prison. then forget everything outside the prison. go in a maze and then lose your map.

i'm here to test myself. i'm here to test anyone. if you think I do not see something then speak up.

ahh but the worth of my little prison, beloved indeed... for all eternity! it shall remain dear to my heart. when did this human experience occur? it is always part of me. it has always been part of me. it will always be part of me. one day I will take this veil off and then the rest of myself and this little prison that I am shall be seen to fit completely together. and this is always unveiling. it is always this beautiful changing and creative energy... just as it is always unchanging and for lack of a word "divine energy".

i'm drawing an endless picture with the only thing I can draw with. it is Gods heart, it is Gods thoughts. that is what reality is. his endless expression with his beautiful purpose. God is realizing what he already realizes. i'm Gods other. i'm the one looking at his face just like he looks at mine. he is so far beyond words. so far beyond the word "God". for all eternity we have found each other. and eternity is such a small thing to him.

in spiritual experience the human remains but the evil does not. the little crystal can be lost in the ocean but it is there and the little crystal is beloved, not less than the ocean. since when did someone think being limited made them less than God? fallen man and his ideas! they are truly insane. they take everything in the wrong way. do you not yet understand what love is? the love God has for us? is a baby less than a man just because he can not talk or walk?

 

[Noxot]

I can't help anyone. they refuse to listen. they love demons rather than angels.
they dash their children to pieces and then they blame God for it.
God sent his angel but they decided to be broken apart by him.

falsehood will not endure. it falls apart when faced with the truth. the little shards of demons squirm around, trying to find a foothold to survive. it is no wonder some people have legion in them, they refuse to cast it out. it gets shattered more and more until they have totally lost themselves. how long will they kick the goads? how long before they see the light and do not bite?

solution ( though there be no solution to this dissolution ) :

youtube.com/watch?v=SVahDeaVVdA

 

[x141]

We are all bound by the same process (of the second forty) that delivers to us the form that truth (our husband/self) comes to us in respect to our five senses, which becomes a law to us, with it's repercussions if we break it.

God is not bound by words on a page, we bind him to this through perception, and thereby bind this infinite truth of self in us to the revealing of our own nakedness.

 

[Noxot]

in one respect we are bound and in another we are not. Jesus told us that we must worship God in spirit and in truth. what measure do we put on those words of his? the prophets are in this world whether they go by religion or not and it does not matter if they know they are or not either. this song sounds like a prophet or a mystic to me:

youtube.com/watch?v=2fsGyFjoyR0

 

[Noxot]

in my life I did notice that fear held me back in a lot of ways... concerning trying to find God. now I will look to see if anything else does keep me from the way though that of itself is the way in some ways. but what is there to do? if people saw that there is no problem then there would be no problem. this world is a nightmare compared to what it is in reality.

I watched a leopard kill a porcupine. no one wins.

youtube.com/watch?v=I4nmWzt5BsE

 

[Noxot]

it's so hard to communicate with people. i feel like i'm from a different world and that it hardly matters how I ever respond to them on a judgmental human level because i can not of my own understand how I will affect a person from my own human understanding and interacting due to the limited capacity for words and attempt to tell the truth compared to the measure that my love for people wants to help them. it is really sad being in the world and seeing the truth to whatever degree but being unable to speak about what I say without getting slapping in the face and making other people think i slap them in the face.

baby concepts of God are so ingrained in me that i don't understand how people don't see the goodness of the foundational knowledge of God even though I used to not understand Gods heart well at all either.

then the next day i will know nothing at all because i hate myself so much and know I don't know anything at all. because i don't care about anything other than the one who can never be described and in caring for him is how I can care for others but I can't of my own self while cut off from God attempt to do something. other times I do nothing at all because I don't know what to do and it would be rather foolish to try to do Gods will when I have no idea what Gods will is.

at my work I try to be silent because what am I supposed to say honestly? there is nothing to say. there is only 'be good and innocent to everyone and don't give in to evils' because of the burden that mankind goes through. there is hardly anyone in this world that wants to talk about deep things and if they do what does it matter because things are so deep that there is nothing to talk about.

the most important thing to me is that people be good and do not function within the evil elements of the world. they don't have to believe God exist or not, they just need to know that virtue and goodness is the way to know God. in being conformed to God we shall see the truth and the truth shall make us free and we shall all see that love and his eternal kingdom was the best thing and most right thing that creation could ever be. no rewards matter. eternal life does not matter. everlasting joy matters. collective salvation of the entire human race matters. living in the Spirit matters.

only Gods heart matters and it is far better than any human could ever conceive of. but to want reward is to lack something. to walk in divine love is everything. if only everyone could see God then no one would suffer. everything is fine except for sin. only separation from God causes pain and suffering. death is a good thing to the one who loves God. torture is terrible but something one is willing to go through for Gods sake.

SURE I want to see the world grow and it does... but they go so slow. I rejoice in every good thing I see for I see the kingdom of heaven therein and they shall not lose their reward for they could never lose what they themselves are. the only thing to lose is this madness, this insanity, this veil of vanity!

I don't know if I died or if I am alive. am I in the world or am i in heaven?

 

[Restoresmysoul]

I think the best way we can help each other is to speak plainly and in the most simplistic manner that we can, and to do this we must think in the most simplistic manner that we are able, from the heart the mouth speaks. I don't really care for theology much, perhaps i have had a bad experience with it, and perhaps there is some value in some of it. Yet i think there is much more value in simplicity than complicated theology. The Lord asks that we live in holiness by speaking truthfully and with good wholesome words, and also by separating ourselves from our carnal natures and instead following what is Holy to God. There is no greater thing that we can do other than to live in holiness and to walk in love. Its that simple.


1 Co 14:19 yet in the church I would rather speak five words with my understanding, that I may teach others also, than ten thousand words in a tongue.

Hebrews 12:14 Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord:

 

[Restoresmysoul]

Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
Be acceptable in Your sight,
O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer.



Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.