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The date..guys only

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Goodbook

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The girl at the dance is talking with you and drinking maybe coffee and the guy that likes her suggests a date and then she asks where and he goes oh lets have more coffee the next day but she would say nah its ok. I have to wash my hair.

I think a guy would need to try harder if he wants a girl to go out with him. Sorry.
 
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Soyeong

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The girl at the dance is talking with you and drinking maybe coffee and the guy that likes her suggests a date and then she asks where and he goes oh lets have more coffee the next day but she would say nah its ok. I have to wash my hair.

I think a guy would need to try harder if he wants a girl to go out with him. Sorry.

There's a girl I've been thinking of asking out, but I have no idea where to go with her. I don't drink coffee or alcohol.
 
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SinnerInTheHands

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Ok this is for guys only.
You are taking out a girl you met at a dance for your first date together. What have you got planned?

Probably dinner and a movie. I've got a philosophy when it comes to dating: never do something on the first date that can't be outdone on the second.

I always make sure the first date is amazing, but that the second date is even better.
 
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Gnarwhal

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Doing an activity is third date (or later) territory. They're more of an investment, and the girl has to prove to me she's a worthwhile investment (of my time and my emotions but also my money). First I'm going to sit down and actually get to know the girl, I would need at least half (preferably 75-100%) of our political views, religious views, world view, etc to line up. If they don't then it's not going to be worthwhile for either of us.

As an example (and this is a real world example because I had a coffee date with a girl like this last December), I'm not going to date a girl who's right-wing (nor would I necessarily date a girl who's left-wing), ignorant, materialistic, spoiled, and/or has an over-inflated ego. I sat down with this girl over coffee and quickly learned she was all of these things. We were courteous and polite with each other, but when the date was over my mind was made up then and there that I would not be pursuing a second one.

If I there's a mutual attraction and things progress beyond first and second dates, then I'll take her to some of the shows featuring local bands, we can go on hikes (there are three national parks in the area), in the summer we might go floating down the river or boating on the lake, in the winter we could go to the Christmas Preview held the weekend before Thanksgiving, we can go look at the Christmas lights displays around town during the holiday season. If we're actually in a relationship then things go even further into day trip and overnight trips, maybe to San Francisco, Bodega Bay, Mendocino, Shasta, Mt. Lassen, etc.

So the possibilities are broad, but they're special and expensive opportunities not to be squandered on a girl who I might not see again after the first date.
 
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Goodbook

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I repeat, coffee does not count as a date.
Anyone can go out for coffee. You have already met this girl and had coffee and conversation with her at the DANCE. You already like her. I would absolutely not waste my time going out for coffee with someone I didnt really like, and if I really liked them I would like him to plan something more special than coffee.
 
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Goodbook

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Well, men could give some insight on where they planning on taking a girl if they ask them out.

Its very hard to get excited to go out and have coffee. a girl could just have it at home.
Must be an american thing. Its like asking a girl out for a cup of tea. You're making it right? Milk, no sugar.
 
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Rhamiel

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we would meet at a French bakery and get some macaroons and... coffee....

then we would go to the Park of Roses, it is a rose garden that is part of a public park, if she felt so inclined we could walk around the other parts of the park while we chat
(this is good, if the date goes well, we can walk around the park for a while, but if it is not going well, we can just check out the rose part and call it a night)

after the park we could go to church together
I dunno.... is going to church weird for a first date?
I never really dated anyone I JUST met
like at a dance
all of my dates have been with girls I have known a while through mutual friends or from school/university

the first Saturday of the month is "gallery hop" all the art galleries are free and a lot of other places have art exhibits
so if it was close to the first of the month, I would plan to do gallery hop with her, take her to a kinda fancy taco place
yeah it is not cheap, but it is not going to break the bank either
 
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