Smacking Children

[llDayo]

Nevermind. Jokes can go too far.

Yeah, that wasn't even a funny joke, more along sick. I saw it when responding to the thread in the posts below the reply area and was just about to call you out on it. Glad you changed your mind.

 

[non-religious]

[Lynden1000] I tried to cover my butt by saying a black man had grabbed me and tried to carry me off.

I'm sure the African American men in your community would applaud you for placing the blame on them

 

[Spinrad]

Yeah, that wasn't even a funny joke, more along sick. I saw it when responding to the thread in the posts below the reply area and was just about to call you out on it. Glad you changed your mind.

Well thank God I didn't get called out on it. Would have ruined my day.

It was funny but you wouldn't know why.

 

[rasplundjr]

I believe in slapping and smacking for certain offenses....

My parents believed in it and I think my sisters and I turned out alright.... Their parents believed in it and I think my parents tunred out fine....

My Wife and her family don't believe in slapping....

We fight about this all the time.... But if we talked back, yelled, swore, or lied to / at our parents we got slapped in the mouth because that's the part that did wrong... just like reaching for something that we shouldn't as kids we got our hands smacked... makes sense for me... I don't believe in hauling off and belting a kid... but a light slap I believe is perfectly acceptable.

 

[furry001]

I do believe in smacking my child (although not just yet - she is only 10 weeks old!). There will come a time when she will understand that what she is doing is unacceptable behaviour and will always get a full explanation of why she was being punished. Of course, discipline can take various forms and we will remove toys for a set period, and things like that. Only if she continues to be naughty after all other methods have failed, then she will get a smack. It will be enough that she doesn't like it, but not enough to really hurt - I don't believe in abusing my child.

I will challenge any interfering busybody (social workers etc) because if my child requires discipline then it is my responsibility as parent to ensure that a suitable discipline is carried out. But it should not be anybody elses business how I do it. Of course, we must protect children from abuse - I don't care who it is, if the child is being abused then there is a serious problem. But we should not be telling parents how they can discharge their responsibility - regardless of what country they live in.

 

[stillsmallvoice]

Hi all!

DW try not to smack Da Boyz if we can avoid it. we try to resort to it very sparingly.

Proverbs 13:24 tells us, "He who spares the rod, hates his son..." I've seen this distorted in all kinds of ways by all kinds of people, some of whom cite it to justify systematic corporal punishment. Israel's former Ashkenazi Chief Rabbi Yisrael Meir Lau notes that the (original) Hebrew word translated as "rod" is shevet, which may also be translated as "sceptre" (as it, in fact, is in Genesis 49:10). He points out that in the Biblical usage, rulers carried rods/sceptres as symbols of their authority; they didn't beat their subjects with them. Rabbi Lau says that Proverbs 13:24 must be seen in this context, i.e. that a parent must provide authority for, and be (inter alia) an authority-figure to, his/her children; the verse is NOT a wholesale license to beat children, an occasional whack on the tush notwithstanding.)

Be well!

ssv

 

[levi501]

It was funny but you wouldn't know why.

The funny part was you fronting up as if you'd do something. You honestly want a fight then go stand in the toy section of a Walmart. There's bound to be a kid throwing a tantrum over a toy and a parent responding in a less then ideal way.

 

[jayem]

I never remember being spanked as a kid, and I turned out fine. Although, my mother tells me that one time my father really wanted to smack me for something--I can't remember it at all, so I must have been only 2 or 3. But apparently I knew what was coming, so I ran and squeezed into a crawl space under the stairs. It was large enough for me to get in and out of, but no one else could get to me. Apparently, when they finally coaxed me out, the desire to spank me had passed. What a smart kid I was! (But I don't remember it at all.)

 

[Spinrad]

The funny part was you fronting up as if you'd do something. You honestly want a fight then go stand in the toy section of a Walmart. There's bound to be a kid throwing a tantrum over a toy and a parent responding in a less then ideal way.

It's all a front, *******. Like an adult hitting a kid.

 

[chipmunk]

I don't have kids, but I can't see a situation where spanking is in order. There are other methods of parenting that don't result in physical violence. I have this crazy idea that raising children takes a lot of patience. And from what I can see too many parents lack this (not accusing anyone here). To be honest, almost everytime I've seen someone spank their child there are better ways they could have dealt with the situation. Maybe I'll change my mind if I ever have kids.

 

[rasplundjr]

I don't have kids, but I can't see a situation where spanking is in order. There are other methods of parenting that don't result in physical violence. I have this crazy idea that raising children takes a lot of patience. And from what I can see too many parents lack this (not accusing anyone here). To be honest, almost everytime I've seen someone spank their child there are better ways they could have dealt with the situation. Maybe I'll change my mind if I ever have kids.

Well all those "other methods" are crud for what I can tell and don't work on any child I've seen.... Might work on millions of them that I haven't seen.. but they don't work on my nieces and nephews, they sure as heck don't work on my kids..... we've tried them... the kids laugh in our faces... becuse their is no discipline there is only the lovey crud that leaves kids feeling better about doing wrong instead of getting them to listen to their parents / elders....

It does take a lot of patience... but sometimes it takes discipline and authority to get through to the kids because nothing else will....

Good luck using other methods, I hope they work for you, I wish they worked for mine....

 

[rasplundjr]

I wish I never had to slap , smack, or spank my kids.... I hate having to do it... but they (my kids) just push and push and push until you have no other recourse but to either spank or become their slave....

I don't do slavery....

 

[quatona]

Talk about vicious circles.

 

[christalee4]

I wish I never had to slap , smack, or spank my kids.... I hate having to do it... but they (my kids) just push and push and push until you have no other recourse but to either spank or become their slave....

I don't do slavery....

I think it all depends on how one defines physical discipline and why we do it. This poster defined it as something done as a last resort, when kids push a parent's patience to the limit. Therefore the smacking is done out of anger. Physical discipline, IMO, consisting of a light swat on the behind, not repeatedly, and not on the face or other parts of the body, and done very infrequently, I don't think will harm a child's psyche irreparably. I don't know if a child will be better for it; all it does is show them that parents will lose control.

http://www.newsobserver.com/102/story/418676.html

The above link to the article on discipline going too far cites a well-known parenting book by Debi and Michael Pearl, who have a website called No Greater Joy. They advocate a very strict form of physical discipline, using instruments, and encouraging parents to make sure that children truly and sincerely feel pain when they are disciplined. The descriptions on child discipline on their website veer into pathological abuse, but many Christians use their books as a guide. I have also read posts by moms who planned to start disciplining babies as young as 6 months old.

There are groups of Christian parents who are against the use of heavy corporal punishment used on children:
http://www.stoptherod.net/

Physical discipline is an easy way to deal with the frustration of managing difficult behavior, and I hope parents will choose to use it less. Harsh physical discipline done in the name of Scripture abuses both the child and their learning about religion and its place in their hearts.

 

[corvus_corax]

My wife and I have been fortunate. We both do believe in the need for physical punishment if other options have played themselves out with no result.
In the past, we have spanked our son. We have done so with an explanation before and after regarding the reason for it. Unlike some have stated earlier in the thread, we always made sure that we were calm when implementing any kind of physical punishment...we never spanked on the spur of the moment when anger would have directed our hand.

As a result of this careful application of rare physical discipline, we havent had to actually spank our child for 2 years now (he's currently 6). Usually a stern word or even a stern look will get him to cease the unfavorable activity.

And if anybody tried to fight me due to me spanking my child...well, that wouldnt be the smartest or wisest decision on their part.
Not all parents spank their kids because they enjoy it or because they're sadistic weak pansies who get their kicks doing it.

 

[rasplundjr]

None of the non spanking approaches I have seen get the child to do what they are supposed to... it let's them out of responsibility....

To heck with that..... They need to start being reponsible, and pay attention to what they're doing... if not when you release them into the world... you're ultimately responisble for what they do because you didn't make them realize "Oh yeah my actions have repurcussions...."

If you can get tehm to accept responsibility without spanking I applaud you, I can't seem to do it....

 

[Rae]

Children should never be intentionally struck by anyone.

 

[rasplundjr]

Children should never be intentionally struck by anyone.

Lotta things shouldn't happen....

Punishment is one thing that has too.... If they won't take it another way... it has to happen some way....

 

[levi501]

It's all a front, *******. Like an adult hitting a kid.

Such simplistic inaccurate reasoning... there's obvious some past experience to make you so biased.

 

[Spinrad]

**** this place asnd **** you people