H
hypnotism
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Besides it seems to me that women start to get really beautiful in their 30s. And that is not JMO.
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Good girlfriend material is often not the same as good wife material. The thing about the way we live, that is without wise involvement from our elders, is that we stumble over things we could have been guided away from. Things like marrying the wrong sort of person. For me and my experience that would be almost any woman from California.My confidence in the solidity of relationships is shaken, if not shattered because of mt divorce. It's really affecting the type of person I'd be looking for, and probably not in a good way.
Wow! Are you sure your name is hypnotism and not pessimism???So why slim pickins?
Rich, I want to clear away one issue first. There are seven or more types of BC a woman can use. She can use two of them at once for total protection. So the issue of "unintended" offspring does not have to enter into the equation unless she wants them to.
Many men are not going to be interested in a woman until they have had sex with her. Many men even have the "three date and no sex good bye rule. " Some say the men will not be able to actually hear what a woman is saying until they have sex with her. Some men say they would not even talk to women if it were not necessary in order to have sex with them.
Is this depressing enough?
How about the other rule, "Never date single mothers.", because they have the healthy instincts that flnativegirl listed.
The lets add that 20 to 30 percent of children are not the offspring of the male who is alleged to be their biological father.
Then lets add the huge divorce rate. Then lets add that the majority of divorces (at least in CA) are filed by women. Then lets add community property laws. Then lets add alimony laws. Then lets add the fact that in many states adultery is legal. So the man is running a real risk of getting into a contractual situation with a woman. Having her violate the contract by having adultery with the neighbor. Then forcing him to pay child support for his children even though they do not live with him. And Alimony to the woman who broke the contract. This happened to two of my cousins. There are huge reasons not to get married.
Given all that it is amazing there are any pickins at all.

Are you sure your name isn't Tony, as in my ex-bf?Wow! Are you sure your name is hypnotism and not pessimism???![]()
Me or him???Are you sure your name isn't Tony, as in my ex-bf?

I agree with you, as you seem to be mostly quoting book facts. But as Christians, we are supposed to be broken away from those conditions and have entirely different conditions completely, i.e. holy.So why slim pickins?
Rich, I want to clear away one issue first. There are seven or more types of BC a woman can use. She can use two of them at once for total protection. So the issue of "unintended" offspring does not have to enter into the equation unless she wants them to.
Many men are not going to be interested in a woman until they have had sex with her. Many men even have the "three date and no sex good bye rule. " Some say the men will not be able to actually hear what a woman is saying until they have sex with her. Some men say they would not even talk to women if it were not necessary in order to have sex with them.
Is this depressing enough?
How about the other rule, "Never date single mothers.", because they have the healthy instincts that flnativegirl listed.
Committed relationships and marriage.
Consider that 20 to 30 percent of children are not the offspring of the male who is alleged to be their biological father.
Then lets add the huge divorce rate. Then lets add that the majority of divorces (at least in CA) are filed by women. Then lets add community property laws. Then lets add alimony laws. Then lets add the fact that in many states adultery is legal. So the man is running a real risk of getting into a contractual situation with a woman, having her violate the contract by having adultery with the neighbor and then having to pay her child support (for his children even though they do not live with him) and also alimony (sometimes for life) to the woman who broke the contract. This happened to two of my cousins. Consider the laws in Washington state where, if a man marries a woman with children, even though they clearly are not his, he is responsible for their support if there is a divorce.
(A man in WA can get stuck for some other mans child support if he just lives with a woman who has children - Male College students need to know this. House mate, just a renter, ha ha ha.)
Then let us add the profound disrespect American women have for men as a result of media conditioning.
There are huge reasons not to get married. My first thread on CF asked why don't some men get married, and I got an earful.
Given all that it is amazing there are any pickins at all.
Like I said in another thread - the way to find the perfect partner is to make sure that "no partner yet" is always an option.
Him. You don't look anything like my ex-bf, but he sure sounds a lot like my ex.Me or him???![]()
LOL! That's what I thought!Him. You don't look anything like my ex-bf, but he sure sounds a lot like my ex.
Hence the "ex-"?Him. You don't look anything like my ex-bf, but he sure sounds a lot like my ex.
I wanted to add that I don't want to be "good girlfriend" material. I'm the marrying kind - thankyouverymuch!Good girlfriend material is often not the same as good wife material. The thing about the way we live, that is without wise involvement from our elders, is that we stumble over things we could have been guided away from. Things like marrying the wrong sort of person. For me and my experience that would be almost any woman from California.
Hmmm...my nekked is sacred, so if a man rules me out because of a 3-date rule, I'm not going to be interested in him as a long-term potential anyway. BC is not fool-proof, by the way - I have a beautiful 5 yr old that is living proof of that.So why slim pickins?
Rich, I want to clear away one issue first. There are seven or more types of BC a woman can use. She can use two of them at once for total protection. So the issue of "unintended" offspring does not have to enter into the equation unless she wants them to.
Many men are not going to be interested in a woman until they have had sex with her. Many men even have the "three date and no sex good bye rule. " Some say the men will not be able to actually hear what a woman is saying until they have sex with her. Some men say they would not even talk to women if it were not necessary in order to have sex with them.
Is this depressing enough?
How about the other rule, "Never date single mothers.", because they have the healthy instincts that flnativegirl listed.
Committed relationships and marriage.
Consider that 20 to 30 percent of children are not the offspring of the male who is alleged to be their biological father.
Then lets add the huge divorce rate. Then lets add that the majority of divorces (at least in CA) are filed by women. Then lets add community property laws. Then lets add alimony laws. Then lets add the fact that in many states adultery is legal. So the man is running a real risk of getting into a contractual situation with a woman, having her violate the contract by having adultery with the neighbor and then having to pay her child support (for his children even though they do not live with him) and also alimony (sometimes for life) to the woman who broke the contract. This happened to two of my cousins. Consider the laws in Washington state where, if a man marries a woman with children, even though they clearly are not his, he is responsible for their support if there is a divorce.
(A man in WA can get stuck for some other mans child support if he just lives with a woman who has children - Male College students need to know this. House mate, just a renter, ha ha ha.)
Then let us add the profound disrespect American women have for men as a result of media conditioning.
There are huge reasons not to get married. My first thread on CF asked why don't some men get married, and I got an earful.
Given all that it is amazing there are any pickins at all.
I'm not sure I understand what that means, AFT. Can you please 'splain it to me?Like I said in another thread - the way to find the perfect partner is to make sure that "no partner yet" is always an option.
I'm not AFTI'm not sure I understand what that means, AFT. Can you please 'splain it to me?![]()
Ahh...gotcha! You just described me perfectly, if that's the case!I'm not AFTbut I think what he was trying to say is that when you are looking for a perfect partner there are times in your life when you might not be in the best frame of mind to make a good choice in a partner...so rather than making a bad choice - you realize that no choice right now (and not getting romantically involved with anyone at the moment) is the best decision...
Not sure that helped to explain it but I tried![]()
It also means that you have to be ok with "any body is not better than nobody."I'm not AFTbut I think what he was trying to say is that when you are looking for a perfect partner there are times in your life when you might not be in the best frame of mind to make a good choice in a partner...so rather than making a bad choice - you realize that no choice right now (and not getting romantically involved with anyone at the moment) is the best decision...
Not sure that helped to explain it but I tried![]()
It also means that you have to be ok with "any body is not better than nobody."