Hello all! My name is Josh and I'm 17 years old! This is my first time posting on these forums and I just want to say it's nice to meet all of you and although I am Agnostic I still respect your belief.
I have always had a rough childhood. I have been abused physically and mentally. I have grown up in a bad home where fighting was always routine between my "parents." Now, I was kicked out of my house and live with my friend! I don't know where life is going to take me now.
I never went to church before until around September in '09. I went off and on with some buddies who really wanted me to convert! They were really kind with it and didn't bother to pressure me at all! They're still my friends to this day.
On April 4th, 2010 I felt a huge sense of pressure on me and was "saved" in front of the whole church. I knew what had happened, and I was experiencing some kind of anxiety attack. I feel bad about leading them on like that. Soon after I was baptized when I knew I didn't really need to be. I lead the "Christian" style for a while, but it soon collapsed when I realized I never really knew God. I really wish I could find out if God was real and if he loved me, but I just don't think he loves me, nor am I completely sure if he exists.
Anyway, I post on some other Christian forums every now and then but nobody has ever directly answered my question on this: Was my baptism and being "saved" in vein? If I ever am able to find God and find out he cares for me, would I have to get baptized again? Thanks and have a great day everyone!
I have always had a rough childhood. I have been abused physically and mentally. I have grown up in a bad home where fighting was always routine between my "parents." Now, I was kicked out of my house and live with my friend! I don't know where life is going to take me now.
I never went to church before until around September in '09. I went off and on with some buddies who really wanted me to convert! They were really kind with it and didn't bother to pressure me at all! They're still my friends to this day.
On April 4th, 2010 I felt a huge sense of pressure on me and was "saved" in front of the whole church. I knew what had happened, and I was experiencing some kind of anxiety attack. I feel bad about leading them on like that. Soon after I was baptized when I knew I didn't really need to be. I lead the "Christian" style for a while, but it soon collapsed when I realized I never really knew God. I really wish I could find out if God was real and if he loved me, but I just don't think he loves me, nor am I completely sure if he exists.
Anyway, I post on some other Christian forums every now and then but nobody has ever directly answered my question on this: Was my baptism and being "saved" in vein? If I ever am able to find God and find out he cares for me, would I have to get baptized again? Thanks and have a great day everyone!