prayer for controlling mother

[ihavefoundgod951]

Powerful prayer (say the numbers)


Heavenly father most high God, I ask in the name of Jesus Christ that you forgive me of all my past sins, transgressions and inequities, please release me from any legal ground Satan or his minions have over me (col 2:14)

"Having canceled the charge of our legal indebtedness which stood against us and condemned us; he has taken it away nailing it to the cross" col 2:14

Father I claim the finished work of the cross over my life and my bloodline, in the name of Jesus please overturn any legal ground Satan had over my life (John 19:28) (col 2:14)
(Luke 11-18-22-23-24) over me and my bloodline, I claim the shed blood of your dear son Jesus over myself and my bloodline.

Father please hear my prayer for I ask it in Jesus name

Amen

 

[Julie.S]

Is she abusive in any way that you could get authorities involved?

 

[katerinah1947]

help my mum is controlling my life I can't do what I want, I'm 34 years old still living at home, not allowed to do anything, always constantly criticising and cursing me, never blessing. She is unbelievably hard and restrictive, while claiming to protect me. She thinks she literally owns me body and soul. I am not even allowed to do what I like with my own hard-earned cash.

I need to break free, please, ask God for mercy and grace..I'm coming to breaking point. I am meant to honor her to have a long life..but I don't feel I can live that long if I stay here any longer.

I am not a baby but she treats me like one and doesn't trust me to do anything. She doesn't do that to any of my other siblings. I don't know what to do. Please pray. Hope that something good comes soon.

Hi,

Honor is honor. To honor your mother does not mean to let her do something that is not honorable for her.

I know a woman who loves and honors her mother, who is exactly like you are saying your mother is.

I know a man whose father is exactly like you say your mother is.

Their lives were identical to yours.

Both of them found a way to leave, and each of them fought hard to leave.

Both of them still love their parents and treat them honorably.

They both tell the truth to and about their individual parents.

And they both help their parents do what they really want, their real wants, which is to be normal good people and parents.

In both of those cases, his and hers, after they left, and understood what their parents are and have done to them, they talk about it with their parents, family, friends and acquaintances at home, in church, at work, and everywhere when, that particular subject comes up.

My genetic father, is a Psychotic, when drinking. Then and only then, is he Psychotic.

Yes, that is a real condition in rare cases. He is just one person who is like that. There are others also.

Both of them, their individual parents were Narcissists.

Honorably, they live and deal with them, just the way everyone is supposed to deal with Narcissists, Professionally and accurately.

Professionals help people understand Narcissism, and most victims can tell you how to treat them correctly.

The present best way to treat extreme Narcissists, by both of them, is to not be near them.

Even a sister of one, has told me that is the only effective way to handle her brother for the rest of us.

It seems to work perfectly.

That first woman with the mother, above, is trained in Psychology, and she graduated with a GPA at 3.9 or so.

She tells me she got a book on her mother, and with following every procedure in there, the book said to stay away from her mother, if none of those techniques worked.

None of those techniques worked, and that woman reacted accordingly.

I know that woman. Her life is much better now.

LOVE,

 

[Goodbook]

Um. ok. but I can't leave because I can't afford to, and when I left to live with my brother for a while he was worse.

I could be homeless, but I don't think that's an option and also nobody at church would take me. I mean they are looking after their own families and I don't want to go flatting again.

Where exactly would I go anyway? There are no refuges for abused children unless its a mental insitution.

 

[katerinah1947]

Hi,


Counseling and if possible education are the key to removing one's own self from an abusive situation.

Here is just an example, of at least a three week time out and safe place for tennis in some city in America.

http://cfp-dc.org/nonprofits/1289/Alternative-House-The-Abused-and-Homeless-Childrens-Refuge

Long term, it is in finding some way, like a trade school, or college, or even starting your own business using SCORE and possibly the SBA or others to help you.

If you have the time, volunteering automatically puts you with people, who are near people, who know how to help you get free.

LOVE,

 

[Goodbook]

Im enrolling in two certificates this term but staying at home because one is through distnace learning and the other is just up the road.

In nz they dont have things like scholarships for tertiary boarding schools anymore.
They did have apprenticeships but im not eligible you need to be 17years old for the free trade courses.
To buy your first home is a nightmare in auckland and unaffordable for a single person. If you want a first home you need to go to a small town where theres practically no jobs because all the cheap first homes are snapped up by property developers.

 

[Goodbook]

What my sister did was go on her OE and never return.

My brothers, it was easier, they just bought a house together with me. But then they could afford to do so. Then living with them was a nightmare because one brother acted like only he owned the place and wouldnt let me do anything much less live there in peace.

I dont fancy living in an apartment in the city if theres no job to go to there. Slumming it with alcoholics and addicts. Its just my mum. Dad is easy to live with. Mum isnt. But shes not there half the time which is ok because shes a workaholic.

I just wondered what other people did and it seems they just got married. But then half the time that doesnt work out either as they end up marrying abusive husbands.


Also, joining a hippie commune does not appeal. I wondered if there was a place for unloved daughters thats not a womens refuge, because I know someone who went there to get away from her abusive boyfriend and she was horrified. She even left the country to start a new life but ended up battling this so called boyfriend which she wouldnt leave, because they bought a house together. Ugh.

 

[Goodbook]

Hmm that sounds like what we need in nz, some kind of safe house like that. Or safe farm. I did wwoofing and I really liked it but i dont think you could do it for more than 2 weeks unless the familiy really liked you and wAnted to adopt you.
It sounds better than a halfway house. Halfway houses require you to be detoxing or on medication, and the house people dont want trouble from parents.

I was reading this novel called 'lisa bright and dark'. Lisa was having troubles that her parents didnt want any responisbility for. In the novel, she ended up insitituionalised but before that her parents just sent her to a rest home for old folks.

If there was a job that actually gave you meals and accomodation included that would be ace. But I can think of no such job, unless you work as a live in nanny for someone else, in a wealthy country perhaps.

 

[katerinah1947]

Hi,

No one of any amazing merit, THAT I KNOW OF, has not had more amazing difficulties in life, and that is Biblical, as one who does what is just and rightious, where those two words mean the same thing, are hated by the world, but they are Also Loved And Taken Care Of By God, in their adversities, with actual information given to them by God, but usually without letting them know, on how to solve problems, such that what they accomplish is greater than others without God because of those others not choosing to be just and righteous where those two words mean the same thing, rather they choose the opposite of that.

Being just and righteous where those two words mean the same thing, is loving, it is choosing love over hate or any other thing for all of life's situations.

And, it only takes one, what is called a good parent, in any abused by another parent child, for that child to have a positive outcome later in life.

Finding a way, to be independent economically, of essentially everybody in life is the key to an abused person escaping and healing from that abuse.,

And, abused people, without hate, are incredible workers.

I know two of these. One is old. THE OTHER IS YOUNG. The older one has never understood why she is constantly employed and sought after.

She does not know that selflessness from her being abused and not deciding to hate ever, but love and like instead, is her key feature.

She works for her employers, as though they are more important than she is.

She, both of them, only know a form of slavery. That was both their entire lives. When they work, both of them, they don't know any other way, than to put all of themselves into the work.

Consider that the younger of these women, I know of her mother. Her mother is an extreme extreme Narcissist, one of her husband's, none of us can find. Her first boyfriend, she escaped somehow the hospitals inquiry as to her actions concerning her boyfriend.

That boyfriends health was not great, and he would later die from his health problems.

It seems as though the hospital was accusing her of actions relating to his early or earlier than normal demise.

That woman's daughter is the younger woman of whom I speak. Altough always affected by her mother's former actions, she is totally free, of her mother, and employed, in something suitable for her.

Just find a way. Also choose love, if you can. Love does mean, treating people as they are, and as they want to be.

Everyone wants to be perfect before God, secretly. Leaving, so a person no longer hurts you, and also telling others of that later, is helping an abuser be what they want to be, before God. Perfect.

It does because sometimes authorities are the only ones to be able to control people's uncontrollable behaviors.,

That is why, if needed, honor by a child, does mean telling the authorities, of any criminal actions by their parents. Love, means helping them be what they want to be, and if it is bad enough, telling the law of their actions, safely.

Leaving, with economic independence, is how abusive parents are handled.

Talking about why you left after it is safe to do so, tells everyone what they really are, thus you are honoring them, by helping them be what they want to be, because it is no longer a secret to others.

LOVE,

 

[Goodbook]

Im not dependent on my mother and never have been but she likes to think I am.

I have never asked her for money that isnt rightfully mine. She was actually withholding money that was mine and it took ages to access it, was like getting blood from a stone.

Now i am financially free, i.e. Dont owe anybody any money and am not looking to get into debt again to anyone else, which is why Im not buying a home as thats just going into debt again, since the only way you could afford one in nz is to go to a small town where theres nobody. You could literally count on one hand the number of homes available to first home buyers.

 

[Goodbook]

When she tried to give me new years money I just gave it back to her.

 

[katerinah1947]

Im not dependent on my mother and never have been but she likes to think I am.

I have never asked her for money that isnt rightfully mine. She was actually withholding money that was mine and it took ages to access it, was like getting blood from a stone.

Now i am financially free, i.e. Dont owe anybody any money and am not looking to get into debt again to anyone else, which is why Im not buying a home as thats just going into debt again, since the only way you could afford one in nz is to go to a small town where theres nobody. You could literally count on one hand the number of homes available to first home buyers.

When she tried to give me new years money I just gave it back to her.

Hi,

Your reaction, and extreme narcissism on your mother's part, is becoming more and more certain, as you say more and more the way she is to you, and the way you are responding to her.

This might help. People with Narcissism, do not think like normal human beings think.

It is one of the things told to their victims by professionals.

The trap is, in thinking and expecting any kind of a normal reaction from them, and when not getting that, you working harder, because you figure it must be there.

Normal parenting and care taking does not exist in Narcissists.

Normal treatment of others, like in a marriage or boyfriend girlfriend relationship does not work either, but only after a commitment is given, as they role play to attract others.

LOVE,

 

[Goodbook]

I was reading in the bible how the parents are meant to put up with the children and not the other way round, the parents are meant to provide and not the other way round.

What happens in a controlling abusive situation is the child becomes a slave to the parent. Or the parent then puts the child out to slavery. To pay for their own lifestyle. The parent will guilt trip the child into everything. For example, mum has never paid the bills ever, but she claims she does because shes married but Ive only ever seen my dad pay the bills.
All the money she earns she hides away and its not even used to pay groceries, she gets this from my dad.

When my dad was made redundant she made such a big stink over it and tried to control what my dad did with his redundancy pay. But we never starved while he was out of work and mum never contributed even though she was working. What she earns is basically pocket money to spend as she pleases. We could easily live on one income actually.

When i was working and flatting I paid everything, cooked my own meals, looked after my car, paid the bills, power, water,cleaned etc. she still thinks I cant do this. But i have done this and can do it again, although she claims I am saving money by being at home. But she kicked a huge stink when I said I was leaving to go flatting.

The thing is I have a birthright to live in my own home and stay on this land. I would not give that up to go live in a foreign country just so I can get work. I think God wants me here because the renting lifestyle is just not for me, its too temporary.

 

[Goodbook]

I dont know if my mums issue is narcissm, it sounded more like OCD personality than narcissm to me when I read the book about emotional vampires. Basically the root is fear. Mum has a fear and she passed that on to me. It had to be cast out when I was born again.

 

[katerinah1947]

Hi,

It is not your job to know. It is mine.

These two reactions of yours and hers and the way your dad Is treated, are totally that of an extreme, Narcissim on your mother's part.

It is text book perfect so far. Normally, it is not that clear. In your case, if I am wrong, I can't see how.

I am going to look above and see if a victims of Narcissism reference has been given to you yet.

If it has not, I will try and find one in a Google Search or otherwise.

I will post it here:

For spouses: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blo...-vampire-s-bite-victims-narcissists-speak-out

For victims in general, meaning, not spouse specific:
https://afternarcissisticabuse.word...signs-that-youve-been-abused-by-a-narcissist/

LOVE,

P.S.

I have and do diagnose, Narcissism. I had to read your posts, all of them, to see if you have ever been given any resources for a victim of narcissism.

The other inputs you give, STILL POINT TO THAT, as (in researcher language), the most probable and near certain at this point, condition affecting the mother, that you have. And, narcissism in your father, is not in evidence, but every input so far, is consistent with the father being a victim also, if a Narcissistic mate, of the severe kind, normally called AXIS II, in the American way of talking about mental illnesses.

 

[katerinah1947]

I dont know if my mums issue is narcissm, it sounded more like OCD personality than narcissm to me when I read the book about emotional vampires. Basically the root is fear. Mum has a fear and she passed that on to me. It had to be cast out when I was born again.

Hi,

Yes OCD, can also be the issue, but there is a large and severe issue, and not with you.

Narcissists, will try and make sure, that you do not know what they are.

They are very great at that.

They can convince others of other conditions, not related to Narcissism, or the general category called Personality Disorder, all of whom, display and have no measureable Remorse.

It is possible, to have more than one condition simultaneously, to have OCD, and Narcissism.

Parents who do not diminish themselves, to further their children, are almost always narcissists.


Normal Parents, watch their children, then do everything in their power to help them be the best form of what they actually are. That. Is. Normal.

Mothers are especially that way. One, Nornal mother, even gives up her job to fellow employees, and moves on. That self same mother has given up three degrees and a career she chose, because others needed her input to get their degrees and careers.

As a result, and she is a normal female, female mother type, she does not have millions, others have, more than one degree, others have, a Ph.D., others were supposed to, but stopped at a Masters Degree.

She is normal. She is a normal mom. She is a normal female. And, of all normal things, God noticed what she did. She is a full blown, non mean Christian. (Mean People are Wolves in Sheeps Clothing, as Christians, and the most vocal, and the most religious sounding, but Jesus said: They are Matthew 7:15 types, and you can determine this, because meanness in women, (thorny ways), is not in those females who actually know and follow God, nor is meanness in males, (briar ways), nor is that found in males who actually know and follow God, the most vocal are Narcisdists or their like, and not really knowing or telling you about God.

God, gave her, what she gave up for others, back to her, but in ways with God and not the world.

It is also normal, in females, in mothers, to actually know God for Real, in some way, and the same is true in males, and in real soldiers also.

Sometimes, they are unaware of that. The rest of us though, do notice.

Males all over the world, but only 50% of them, only 50%, have mates like that, and they talk about them, as their most prized gift from God, on earth.

We females, beyond love, if that is possible and it is not, love our fig like guys. And, I think they all know it.

My life exists, because some guy asked me, and he is........

Well that is not for now. I only wanted to tell you that women who are wonderful, are also victimized by males who are Narcissists. It is not just women, who are Narcissists.

LOVE,

 

[katerinah1947]

I dont know if my mums issue is narcissm, it sounded more like OCD personality than narcissm to me when I read the book about emotional vampires. Basically the root is fear. Mum has a fear and she passed that on to me. It had to be cast out when I was born again.

Hi,

Born again, makes a real difference in you.

LOVE,

 

[Goodbook]

I read the second link.

Now I know.
I was put in hospital at 16 and thought it was all my fault and was going crazy. The therapist said that my mother and me were 'enmeshed'.
I remember growing up afraid of something, I don't know what, I had nightmares of being suffocated. I was afraid to sleep. I was put on a cocktail of drugs. They called it bipolar disorder.

I suffered from this a long time before the Lord set me free, and helped me to be strong.
I didn't know anything about boundaries.

I noticed in another friend who suffered bipolar that her relationship with her mother was not normal either. In the end her neglect and lack of affection killed her - she went missing. When I read biographies of people who suffered,(used to be called manic depression) it was always the mothers being controlling, and they, the mothers always painted themselves as saints and the daughters as wayward. But the daughters couldn't speak out about their mothers to anyone. It was impossible. Only a few admitted the truth but they ended up destroying themselves...they could never turn on their own mothers.

My mother doesn't do anything that you could report to the police. Its more subtle than that. Its like death with a thousand cuts instead. If I don't follow the Lord and without his grace I could end up just like her without realising. Before I got free from bipolar after much prayer my suffering was inexplicable and I leaned on the verse 'my grace is sufficent for you'. When I am weak He is strong..I had to learn to cast out those demons.

I think its the ancient dragon worship. She is like a dragon, she hoards everything and uses it against me. She has this power over me that mothers have, but before it was all consuming and I didn't know how to fight it.

Its like she picked on me as the weakest one. Because I didn't actively rebel like the others and stand up for myself.

 

[katerinah1947]

I read the second link.

Now I know.
I was put in hospital at 16 and thought it was all my fault and was going crazy. The therapist said that my mother and me were 'enmeshed'.
I remember growing up afraid of something, I don't know what, I had nightmares of being suffocated. I was afraid to sleep. I was put on a cocktail of drugs. They called it bipolar disorder.

I suffered from this a long time before the Lord set me free, and helped me to be strong.
I didn't know anything about boundaries.

I noticed in another friend who suffered bipolar that her relationship with her mother was not normal either. In the end her neglect and lack of affection killed her - she went missing. When I read biographies of people who suffered,(used to be called manic depression) it was always the mothers being controlling, and they, the mothers always painted themselves as saints and the daughters as wayward. But the daughters couldn't speak out about their mothers to anyone. It was impossible. Only a few admitted the truth but they ended up destroying themselves...they could never turn on their own mothers.

My mother doesn't do anything that you could report to the police. Its more subtle than that. Its like death with a thousand cuts instead. If I don't follow the Lord and without his grace I could end up just like her without realising. Before I got free from bipolar after much prayer my suffering was inexplicable and I leaned on the verse 'my grace is sufficent for you'. When I am weak He is strong..I had to learn to cast out those demons.

I think its the ancient dragon worship. She is like a dragon, she hoards everything and uses it against me. She has this power over me that mothers have, but before it was all consuming and I didn't know how to fight it.

Its like she picked on me as the weakest one. Because I didn't actively rebel like the others and stand up for myself.

Hi,


Strength comes from being tender and mild not mean nasty and a predator of humans, even your own offspring. Children.

To say I am strong, not weak, is actually to say that ,I am tender and mild.

What attracts a Narcissist, is niceness.

Narcissists, don't want anyone to know they are a Narcissist, the literature says.

Dealing with a Narcissist, for me, always is long and drawn out.

The Narcissist, that I am presently working with, being homeless, makes my job harder, as there is so much less information out there on homeless people.

I think I am at the point of total discovery, and like always, it is a mismatch, from what he says he is, his money position also, and it is in finding out the true mismatch cannot exist, meaning 100% of a person's reactions should be who they say they are and not merely 80% correct.

This one only took me a year or a year and a half, for his didcerepancirs to be proven.

The best description I have in analogies for very clever Narcissists is this, As though, they are the entire staff for a dishonest politician, in one person, they do everything a dishonest politician does and for almost exactly the same reasons, but to fewer people.

LOVE,

 

[katerinah1947]

I read the second link.

Now I know.
I was put in hospital at 16 and thought it was all my fault and was going crazy. The therapist said that my mother and me were 'enmeshed'.
I remember growing up afraid of something, I don't know what, I had nightmares of being suffocated. I was afraid to sleep. I was put on a cocktail of drugs. They called it bipolar disorder.

I suffered from this a long time before the Lord set me free, and helped me to be strong.
I didn't know anything about boundaries.

I noticed in another friend who suffered bipolar that her relationship with her mother was not normal either. In the end her neglect and lack of affection killed her - she went missing. When I read biographies of people who suffered,(used to be called manic depression) it was always the mothers being controlling, and they, the mothers always painted themselves as saints and the daughters as wayward. But the daughters couldn't speak out about their mothers to anyone. It was impossible. Only a few admitted the truth but they ended up destroying themselves...they could never turn on their own mothers.

My mother doesn't do anything that you could report to the police. Its more subtle than that. Its like death with a thousand cuts instead. If I don't follow the Lord and without his grace I could end up just like her without realising. Before I got free from bipolar after much prayer my suffering was inexplicable and I leaned on the verse 'my grace is sufficent for you'. When I am weak He is strong..I had to learn to cast out those demons.

I think its the ancient dragon worship. She is like a dragon, she hoards everything and uses it against me. She has this power over me that mothers have, but before it was all consuming and I didn't know how to fight it.

Its like she picked on me as the weakest one. Because I didn't actively rebel like the others and stand up for myself.

Hi,

Thinking it is your fault is standard treatment of you by a Narcissist.

LOVE,