Porn

[Pete Harcoff]

Originally posted by David Gould
And no-one's told me what huffing is.

It's bad for you. You don't want to know.

 

[David Gould]

Originally posted by Anthony
I agree with you on "Christians" they always want to fight someone else's battle, and telling you what is bad or good for you. Without even knowing who you are. Do I know you? No, so don't preach to me. "Look at the plank in your own eye before you try to remove the splinter in mine".

So for unmarried people, well then we are talking about sex before marriage, that is a whole separate discussion

 

But are we talking about sex before marriage? If I am a single man watching porn am I having sex before marriage?

 

[Susan]

Good articles, Coastie.

 

[Pete Harcoff]

Originally posted by Outspoken
"There's no difference except what people imagine in their minds.
"

wrong

Fine, then prove there is a difference. I'm willing to cocede that, yes, there may be a psychological difference in the mindset of the two people engaging the act itself. But that's it. If you think there's somehow some other difference I'm unaware of, then please elighten me.

Christians don't view it as dirty and that is a strawman Pete, burn it if you want, but its quite a stereotype and not true at all.

If you go back and read my original post that you are taking issue with (#44), I was referring to society (more specifically, American society). I was not trying to single out Christians.

Sex, in general, is still a taboo subject for much of American society. Everyone's doing it, but no one wants to admit to doing it. People get embarrassed when shopping for condoms. People won't admit to looking a porn. And people don't generally want to hear about other people's sex lives (at least, not in public).

In general, I think people make too much of a big deal about sex.

 

[Anthony]

Originally posted by David Gould
But are we talking about sex before marriage? If I am a single man watching porn am I having sex before marriage?

That's a tough question, as I am married now. And would consider myself sort of a hypocrite, to "now say" that it is wrong. Is it sex before marriage? No; because it isn't sex. That's a cop out on my part, but is it wrong?

I'll answer it this way, does watching porno and masturbating to it, characterized you? Are you in the habit of doing it? If you're a Christian it is a form of Lusting, which is a sin. Again sins are signs, which warn of danger around the corner. If it is part of your character than you need to stop and think about.

 

 

 

[coastie]

Originally posted by Pete Harcoff
First of all, who are these people? What are their pre-existing notions towards sex? Backgrounds? Behavioral patterns?

don't know... you've seen studies with contradictory results?

Define an "increased callousness toward women". And are we talking a significant increase?

Increase is an increase. Any increase in callousness toward women is a bad thing. To suggest otherwise is a dangerous precedent.

And what were their opinions beforehand?

Don't know, maybe he's trying to fool us all so that he can all of the pornography for himself.

Define "distorted perceptions".

you read the article. What do you consider distorted perceptions? You're really grasping at straws here.

I'll grant this. And, like anything, I'll grant it's possible to "overdose" on porn. BUT, this doesn't necessarily mean that people that "intake" porn at a normative level would require more "bizarre" porn to "do the job".

what's a "normative" level?

Given societal behavior, it appears that non-monogamous behavior IS normal and natural behavior. Why try to force people to be something they are not?

in the article (which you give as much credence to as a DR. Suess book anyway) the DR. wrote

"The best evidence to date suggests that most or all sexual deviations are learned behaviors, usually through inadvertent or accidental conditioning. There is no convincing evidence to date, suggesting the hereditary transmission of any pathological sexual behavior pattern such as rape, incest, pedophilia, exhibitionism, or promiscuity."

"Forcing someone to be what they are not" is your inference and according to this article, it is inaccurate.

Seriously, what is the point in arguing this if every source provided you rule out as "FUD"? Does your own expertise surpass that of psycologists?

Read the other articles too please.

 

[4-low]

Anthony, I totally agree with you, Good call....

 

[lithium.]

Originally posted by Outspoken
its demoralizing because of several reasons. It objectifies people, it causes adiction to it resulting in antisocial behavior and can ruin relationships. If you're a christian, its against what the bible says.

I will never understand how people can be adicted to porn I have watched porn before it's not a big deal and I am not adicted to it I havn't watched porn in about year. I watched it with my girl friend.

 

[lithium.]

Originally posted by Susan
My main objections to porn are moral and spiritual. Aside from that I find it distasteful, sick, stupid, and not worth my time. >_<

I have to leave in 10 minutes so I'm not saying anything now. I will post later though -^.^-

Do you think all forms of sex is sick and stupid?

 

[lithium.]

Originally posted by Susan


You're atheists, you will never understand. . .

Thats crazy I know christians that watch porn they don't think anything is really wrong cause they know that god will forgive them.

 

[Pete Harcoff]

Originally posted by coastie
don't know... you've seen studies with contradictory results?

First of all, you don't think it's important to note the opinions of individuals BEFORE the experiment?

Second, I'll admit I've never had need to seek out any studies on porn. I simply base my opinions on personal experience. I have read articles and watched shows which come to pretty much the opposite conclusions of what you posted. Unfortunately, I don't know if such things would be considered "link-safe" on this site. And, like I said, most people I know will admit to looking at porn. And these people seem to be normal, healthy individuals with no criminal records or otherwise records of deviant behavior.

Basically, I haven't experienced any of these "bad things" some people attribute to porn.

Increase is an increase. Any increase in callousness toward women is a bad thing. To suggest otherwise is a dangerous precedent.

Yes, but what exactly are we talking about? I mean, if I had to watch naked people get it on for 6 weeks straight, I might get a little sick of seeing naked people. Does this mean I've developed an "increase in callousness toward women"? I could eat vanilla ice cream for 6 weeks straight and get sick of that, too. Does this mean I've developed an increase in callousness toward vanilla ice cream?

Don't know, maybe he's trying to fool us all so that he can all of the pornography for himself.

Again, I think knowing the opinions and values of his test subjects BEFORE the experiment is kind of relevant here.

you read the article. What do you consider distorted perceptions? You're really grasping at straws here.

First we have to define what is considered "normal". And this will vary from person to person. Personally, I would consider "non-distorted" sexual behavior to include any mutually consenting sexual acts of legal age (no kids, animals, rape, etc).

However, I don't consider things like bondage or S&M to be "normal". Yet, if there are consenting individuals out there who engage in and enjoy such activity. For my perspective they have "distorted perceptions" about sex. Does this mean they're "bad"?

what's a "normative" level?

Again, this would vary depending on the individual.

However, I concede that you can desensitize people to things by exposing to them. So any exposure about the level required to desensitize them, would be "too much". Like many things in life, you need to control the "doses", so to speak.

in the article (which you give as much credence to as a DR. Suess book anyway) the DR. wrote

Hey! I'll have you know I highly revere Dr. Suess.

"The best evidence to date suggests that most or all sexual deviations are learned behaviors, usually through inadvertent or accidental conditioning. There is no convincing evidence to date, suggesting the hereditary transmission of any pathological sexual behavior pattern such as rape, incest, pedophilia, exhibitionism, or promiscuity."

I'd have to dig on this point. However, I read an article awhile back (I think I posted a link to it in some other thread) about Bonobo (Pygmy Chimpanzee) culture and their sex lives. They seem to have very promiscuous sexual lives with no hangs up about "doing it" in public, or anything else. Yet they have... no porn.

Like I said, I'll have to dig.

Seriously, what is the point in arguing this if every source provided you rule out as "FUD"? Does your own expertise surpass that of psycologists?

Because I don't automatically subscribe to fear just because someone says so. I've seen no evidence that "porn is bad" (which, in a nutshell, is your whole argument and the point behind the first three articles you posted). I believe there is a certain social mindset which can lead people to believe porn is "bad". But I believe this mindset (like those "pathological sexual behaviors") is also learned.

Read the other articles too please.

I did. If you have points you want to bring up, then bring them up.

 

[lithium.]

No, you're wrong. christians aren't against Sex, they are against forfication

What's the difference?

 

[HazyRigby]

To add a different perspective:

I am a happily-married woman. Very happily married. I've enjoyed watching porn for most of my adult life, and I've never seen a thing wrong with it.

Here's the thing: I don't think anyone would turn exclusively to porn unless that person perceived something was wrong in his sexuality OUTSIDE of porn. In other words, if a man's wife is frigid, I'm sure he's more likely to touch frequently. If a woman's husband isn't attentive to the kinds of things that please her, then she's more likely to turn to alternate sources of pleasure. Get it? I don't think it's a coincidence that we never hear about pornography breaking up a non-religious marriage; it's because many religions demonize sex and pleasure to the point that either or both partners might view making love as "dirty," thus causing pain and frustration to the person longing for a normal, healthy sex life.

If you women ever wonder why your man has a fascination with internet porn, XXX films, Hustler, or the like, have you ever considered that it could be YOUR fault? Do you cringe every time your husband touches you, anticipating that he might want sex? Do you refuse to fulfill any of his fantasies, even the simple ones, because you find them "disgusting" and "perverted"? Do you wish you never had to have sex again?

Then, as far as I'm concerned, you deserve to have a husband who can't keep his eyes to himself--you're not fulfilling his needs! (And this goes for men who refuse to please their wives, as well--I'm just using an example more familiar to me. ) And if you don't like sex, why in heaven's name would you CARE if your husband masturbates? Do you expect him to go his entire life having sex once a month? Geez.

Sorry for the rant, but this is a subject that really, truly disturbs me. People (especially women) turn their partners down repeatedly and refuse to take pleasure in one of the simplest, most wonderful acts of love there is, and then they wonder why their partners are unfaithful. Sheesh. I really feel for men sometimes.

 

[Anthony]

Men touch with porno, because it's fun, simple, quick and you don't have to ask. Men have been doing this since they found their father's stash of magazine and tapes when they were teenagers. I think it's starts with us in the womb.  

I don't think many women have a clue what their better half is up to, with that free time of his on the internet.

 

 

[HazyRigby]

Umm, Anthony, I think it goes the other way just as easily. Women like to do stuff like that as well, you know.

And honey, if you have to "ask" to have sex, then you're doing it wrong.

 

[Anthony]

Originally posted by HazyRigby
Umm, Anthony, I think it goes the other way just as easily. Women like to do stuff like that as well, you know.

And honey, if you have to "ask" to have sex, then you're doing it wrong.

Masturbation is sex-lite

 

[HazyRigby]

Eh? I'd hardly insult sex by calling masturbation "sex lite."

I'd like to ask the fellas on this forum a question: if you were married (assuming you aren't), and your wife was as interested in sex as you are (and just as willing!), would you be as inclined to search out porn?

 

[Rising_Suns]

I'll take this time to interject here.

The bottom line is, if you want to grow further in your walk with God, you must avoid any sort of sexual temptation (porn in this case). Those that don't care about God, do what they please.


(making love in marriage is different of course)

 

[HazyRigby]

But what if the porn in question is being watched by married people?

 

[Rising_Suns]

Originally posted by HazyRigby
But what if the porn in question is being watched by married people?

That would still be going against God. Marriage is a unity of a man and woman, and anything related to sex should be shared between them and them alone. Watching porn brings in an outside element, as if your sex life is not already fullfilled by your lover. I would strongly advice anyone who watches porn with their spouse to spot immediately. It's simply impure.