Paedophilia & incest... what do I do?

[Observer]

Just right now, I've been in a Christian chatroom. A man has PMed me, requesting help. I can't turn my back on him, but at the same time, it would be safer for me if I did. He has told me that he's a single dad, with daughters. He started out saying he's worried about his youngest daughter, that her sexual behaviour is unacceptable. After a while of talking, he's opened up to me and told me that he is attracted to his daughter, and has spied on her having sex. I have been very understanding with him, to try and help him... what he's doing physically made me feel sick, but I still feel like I need to help him. He said he told her that he saw her, and she was angry, but then she said she understood. But since then, he's watched her more times behind her back, and has developed sexual feelings for her. He says he got divorced, and is still attracted to his ex wife's appearance, and his daughter looks like her. He is obviously being affected by this illness, and I am not blind and can tell he is hoping to get something sexual out of me because I'm 18 and he knows this, but I do believe he is also trying to seek help. I've just been asking him lots of questions, and asking him how he feels toward what he's doing. He says he has mixed feelings, and what he's doing does scare him "a little"... but I can tell this illness and his sexual feelings are making him more and more indifferent to what's going on in his home. I really need advice on what to do right now. His daughter needs protection and he needs help, and I have no clue what I can or am supposed to do about it. I don't know if there is anything I can do. I have prayed about it... but I don't feel any answer yet.

Now he's got me talking to his "daughter"... but I think it's still him. The font change was a bit too obvious... but I don't know. I'm running out of energy for this, especially if it's a game.

Should I do anything about this?

 

[Davis]

Pray and wash your hands clean of this.
For the time being anyway. Put it in Gods hands.

 

[Mister Emu]

Good Lord,

This is a bad situation... you said paedofilia in your title... how old is the daughter?

As hard as the situation might be... this is possibly something you cannot leave alone... the dad needs some serious psychological help... and you need to steer him that way... also if you believe he may be a threat to his daughters and have the opportunity, you need to inform the authorities.

 

[Davis]

Seriously prayer is the best thing right now.
To say that anything else is greater than God is silly. Through prayer God can put those people that are close to the situation in place. You need to have faith. Pray!!!

 

[Mister Emu]

I did not say to forgoe prayer... We should pray... but the Lord works through action as well...

 

[tapero]

Hi,

What a dilemma. But if he admits to incest or pedophelia (sp), call your local police department and they can track him through the computer. I wonder too if it's the daughter. Sounds like he's trying to drag you in his den somehow. Maybe this is how he gets his kicks. I'll pray , tapero

 

[Erock83]

Just right now, I've been in a Christian chatroom. A man has PMed me, requesting help. I can't turn my back on him, but at the same time, it would be safer for me if I did. He has told me that he's a single dad, with daughters. He started out saying he's worried about his youngest daughter, that her sexual behaviour is unacceptable. After a while of talking, he's opened up to me and told me that he is attracted to his daughter, and has spied on her having sex. I have been very understanding with him, to try and help him... what he's doing physically made me feel sick, but I still feel like I need to help him. He said he told her that he saw her, and she was angry, but then she said she understood. But since then, he's watched her more times behind her back, and has developed sexual feelings for her. He says he got divorced, and is still attracted to his ex wife's appearance, and his daughter looks like her. He is obviously being affected by this illness, and I am not blind and can tell he is hoping to get something sexual out of me because I'm 18 and he knows this, but I do believe he is also trying to seek help. I've just been asking him lots of questions, and asking him how he feels toward what he's doing. He says he has mixed feelings, and what he's doing does scare him "a little"... but I can tell this illness and his sexual feelings are making him more and more indifferent to what's going on in his home. I really need advice on what to do right now. His daughter needs protection and he needs help, and I have no clue what I can or am supposed to do about it. I don't know if there is anything I can do. I have prayed about it... but I don't feel any answer yet.

Now he's got me talking to his "daughter"... but I think it's still him. The font change was a bit too obvious... but I don't know. I'm running out of energy for this, especially if it's a game.

Should I do anything about this?

Call child proactive services like yesterday and send them a copy of your chat. Inform them that NO, I repeat NO damage has been done. But this man does need the states help and his daughters need to have a father that loves them in the right way.

One Love.

 

[Stinker]

Sounds like a sexual predator to me.

 

[matthewgoh]

Hi Observer,

I would suggest, you ask him to seek advise in this forum. The guys here can PM him to help.

 

[Mr.Cheese]

Sounds like a sexual predator to me.

Yep yep.

 

[Peppermint Patty]

This man is playing games with you, and you're falling right into it by trying to help him. He's probably really getting something out of your talks, and as you're only 18, he still sees you as a naive kid. I would not continue talking to him at all!

 

[Deb7777]

This man is playing games with you, and you're falling right into it by trying to help him. He's probably really getting something out of your talks, and as you're only 18, he still sees you as a naive kid. I would not continue talking to him at all!

Hi Observer, I agree with Peppermint Patty, your 18, you've offered your advice, tell him to seek help from the medical community and the Church by talking to a minister of God. There's really nothing more you can do for him except to keep him in prayer and tell him to seek out forums and older Christians because I think this a bit much for you and the Lord does not want you to be burden and overwhelmed. God bless. He needs to put the Lord's words into effect in his life and start to put on the new man in Christ.

 

[Silent Enigma]

This man is playing games with you, and you're falling right into it by trying to help him. He's probably really getting something out of your talks, and as you're only 18, he still sees you as a naive kid. I would not continue talking to him at all!

That's what I think. Cut all ties to this perv immediately. He's just messing with your mind. People do this on the internet all the time.

Here on CF my wife got a PM from some guy claiming to be from england, said he wanted to talk about a problem with his nieces. I logged in and PM'ed him back and obviously never got a response from the bugger, which confirmed my suspicion. If someone really wanted advice for some problem he wouldn't secretly get it from women on the internet.

 

[Godsgirl481]

Whether or not he is lying or messing with you, what he is saying is illegal. If he is not lying and you do nothing, this poor girl will get raped by her father. If you alert your local police, they can and will trace him back to his home. The internet is just a big community of local area networks, and ALL can be traced back to it's location by it's IP address. No one will do anything unless he has broken a law, and vourism is not illegal...yet. I would be on this hot and heavy. Find out as much as you can about his location and what he is doing (if anything) to her. If you don't want to, I will for you.

 

[heron]

I agree. Whether he's lying or telling the truth, I still think he's pulling you into something creepy that he's enjoying. He might be reaching out for help, but you need to get him real help-- get the daughter away from him temporarily.

 

[Godsgirl481]

I would like to see her away from him permantly...sorry but I don't take pedifilia lightly, nor am I too neive to know that if he is thinking about it, it will happen one day, and keep happening.

 

[PapaLandShark]

Just right now, I've been in a Christian chatroom. A man has PMed me, requesting help. I can't turn my back on him, but at the same time, it would be safer for me if I did. He has told me that he's a single dad, with daughters. He started out saying he's worried about his youngest daughter, that her sexual behaviour is unacceptable. After a while of talking, he's opened up to me and told me that he is attracted to his daughter, and has spied on her having sex. I have been very understanding with him, to try and help him... what he's doing physically made me feel sick, but I still feel like I need to help him. He said he told her that he saw her, and she was angry, but then she said she understood. But since then, he's watched her more times behind her back, and has developed sexual feelings for her. He says he got divorced, and is still attracted to his ex wife's appearance, and his daughter looks like her. He is obviously being affected by this illness, and I am not blind and can tell he is hoping to get something sexual out of me because I'm 18 and he knows this, but I do believe he is also trying to seek help. I've just been asking him lots of questions, and asking him how he feels toward what he's doing. He says he has mixed feelings, and what he's doing does scare him "a little"... but I can tell this illness and his sexual feelings are making him more and more indifferent to what's going on in his home. I really need advice on what to do right now. His daughter needs protection and he needs help, and I have no clue what I can or am supposed to do about it. I don't know if there is anything I can do. I have prayed about it... but I don't feel any answer yet.

Now he's got me talking to his "daughter"... but I think it's still him. The font change was a bit too obvious... but I don't know. I'm running out of energy for this, especially if it's a game.

Should I do anything about this?

First of all you have done the right thing by asking for help. Your mention of prayer is wonderful. What I would suggest is seeking a face to face with a pastor about this. You could also seek someone here with training able to help you and this person. We have several pastors on staff and I can certainly have one of them drop you a line if you wish. Main thing is that you need to know you aren't alone in this and help is available. PM me if you wish.

May the Lord draw you close Brother.

 

[Abiel]

1. Stop communication.
2.Take what you know to your local authorities.
3.Pray, and if you feel the need, seek counsel from your own minister- but still do step two.
4.If you need to change your contact details so further communication is not possible.

 

[heron]

Oh yeah, number 4 is important...forgot about that.

http://www.ic3.gov/
Keep the Federal Internet Crime site at your fingertips, in case he's leading you into something else. Oops, the world does not revolve around the US.

You can usually report suspicion of abuse to social services, and they will quietly investigate without mentioning their sources.
http://www.ic.holmesglen.vic.edu.au/internetsearch/sgl_youth.htm

 

[chilehed]

Observer,

Good suggestions so far. This guy sure sounds like a predator to me, and even if he's not you aren't equipped to give him the help he needs other than telling him to get counseling right away. He has no business talking about this with a woman as young and vulnerable as you, and the fact that he is should scare you. Nothing against you, but to a guy in his 30's or 40's someone your age is easy pickin's just like you'd have an easy time manipulating someone half your age. There's a reason he's talking to a woman close to his daughter's age, rather than to a man his own who will hold him accountable.

Contact your local police department, a lot of them have internet crime groups dealing with this stuff.

If you set your chatroom profile options to allow others to see your e-mail address, I strongly recommend explaining the situation to your internet service provider and asking them to change your address.

Trust your instincts. You obviously know that something's very wrong here. RUN, don't walk, RUN from this situation, and don't look back!