OT: Favorite Seinfeld bits

[ArmyMatt]

listen to your pulse: hey buddy, hey buddy, hey buddy

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

I have a bad feeling that whenever a lesbian looks at me they think "That's why I'm not a heterosexual." –George Costanza

I don't think I've ever been to an appointment in my life where I wanted the other guy to show up. –George Costanza

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"I have no medical evidence to back me up, but something happened during the operation that staved off that infection. Something beyond science. Something perhaps from above..." "Mint?" "Those can be very refreshing." - The doctor and Kramer, in "The Junior Mints"

 

[ArmyMatt]

"I have no medical evidence to back me up, but something happened during the operation that staved off that infection. Something beyond science. Something perhaps from above..." "Mint?" "Those can be very refreshing." - The doctor and Kramer, in "The Junior Mints"

Jerry: Because it's a small mint. it's a JUNIOR mint

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"I'm telling you, the jig is up." "It was a bad jig to begin with. We never should've started this jig." "It was a good jig." "It was a bad jig. A terrible terrible jig." - George and Jerry, in "The Limo"

Jerry: Because it's a small mint. it's a JUNIOR mint

 

[ArmyMatt]

George: see? there are no rules here, it's like Thunderdome!

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

George: see? there are no rules here, it's like Thunderdome!

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"They can't shoot us in the city." "Naah, no one's ever been shot in the city." - George and Jerry, in "The Limo"

"Did you see the way she was looking at me?" "She's a Nazi, George, a Nazi!" "I know, I know. Kind of a cute Nazi, though." - George and Jerry, in "The Limo"

 

[ArmyMatt]

Kramer: it's Pagliacci, Jerry. the great, tragic clown. like you."

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"You're going underwater?" "Yes. Generally that's where scuba diving is done." "What do you have to go underwater for? What's down there that's so special?" "What's so special up here?" - Helen and Jerry, in "The Pen"

 

[gracefullamb]

Not sure if it has been mentioned so sorry if I am repeating but my favorite skit is Elaine and refusing to remove the baseball cap. My brothers swear that would so be me refusing to remove my cap.

 

[ArmyMatt]

George: yes, I am familiar with this syndrome. she's a two-face.
Jerry: you mean like the Batman villain?
George: ....if that helps you...

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"Have you ever met a proctologist? They usually have a very good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. Plant yourself there because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there. Never. It's always an accident. Every proctologist story ends in the same way... 'It was a million to one shot, doc, million to one.' " - Kramer, in "The Fusilli Jerry"

 

[Adam Warlock]

George: yes, I am familiar with this syndrome. she's a two-face.
Jerry: you mean like the Batman villain?
George: ....if that helps you...

Bad lighting on the porch!

 

[ArmyMatt]

Newman: VILE WEED!

 

[Colleen1]

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"That's it! Flaming globes of Sigmond! Flaming globes of Sigmond! That's my note! That's what I thought was so funny? That's not funny. There's nothing funny about that." - Jerry, in "The Heart Attack"

 

[ArmyMatt]

George: I's depressed! I'm disturbed! I'm inadequate! I've got it all!

 

[ArmyMatt]

Jerry: whoa....xanadu.....

 

[gurneyhalleck1]

"Why would I be a leg man? I don't need legs. I have legs." - Jerry, in "The Implant"