OCD is destroying my faith... HELP!

[TheWorriedOne]

Anyone?

 

[raven1]

Hi man, I wish I could help you. Today I have an overwhelming feeling God does not exist. Wouldn't it be grand if we knew we were saved on what we want to be true not want we believe is true since we cannot know for sure. I am personally never going to leave God because I can't prove he doesn't exist but I can't prove he does either. I have given up on thinking this doubt God exists is OCD it does me no good to look at best case scenario. So I can have no comfort I am saved. You seem to believe yours is OCD so hold on to that.

 

[raven1]

As far as the athiest thing. I feel like I want to be one so I get it.

 

[kerrysue]

Yeah that's a question I thought too Raven. Also I just saw the doctor and he sais there are many people like me and the best way to deal with it was to keep myself busy. I would like to do that but I feel like I have to address these thoughts or I'll lose mu faith and I go into this cycle. So how can I ignore and be sure I won't lose my faith?

Worried One, I see you wrote this quite a while back now, and don't know how you are doing now but I have to say that your doctor must not deal with many patients with OCD as keeping busy is not a real help. You need to see a doctor or psychiatrist that can give you real help. It won't help you to try to address these thoughts on your own, that only makes the obssessions worse. If you read material about OCD even you will see that "ignoring it" is a silly answer--

 

[gracealone]

This cracks me up Raven, not because I don't understand how miserable it all makes you but because I remember thinking in this same train of thought and being terrified by it.
But just now, I just got this vision in my head of a "Agnostic- Failures Anonymous" meeting. Their motto would have to be: " When Ignorance is NOT Bliss!" I picture this room with a bunch of folk sitting around ringing their hands or sitting with their heads in their hands. One of them pipes up and says..."My name if Fred and I'm a failing Agnostic... and well... I'm worried that God might really exist after all!" Everyone gives him a hug and a pat on the shoulder after that and says..."Hi Fred."
But in the real world if there really was an Agnostics club, poor Fred would get kicked out because Agnostics are people who use their supposed ignorance as an excuse to ignore God. And in their world Ignorance really is bliss. It's not that they can't know, it's rather that they don't want to know. Because if they know then a big old wrench gets thrown into their plans to live life on their terms rather than on Gods. So "Fred" would really tick them off. I can picture them all plugging their ears and making loud noises so they wouldn't have to hear what he had to say. A real agnostic isn't freaked out that they don't know. They are happy to say... "I don't know."
I know this doesn't bring you any comfort because OCD doesn't accept logic it's fuel is anxiety and rumination.
Mitzi

Do I believe in hell more than God? I dont believe or disbelieve anything I am basically agnostic without wanting to be. Even though part of me says I want to be agnostic.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Hey all I'm doing ok-ish. But I'm gonna try to help you some Raven this kind of works for me but it might work well for you everyone's different. Well to start Atheist people always try to make the idea of God stu

 

[TheWorriedOne]

I'll continue my iPod messed up. Haha.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Atheist people try to make the idea of God stupid they think it but also the Atheist goes around trying to convince other people God's not real by saying things that make God sound ridiculous like, do you really think there's some magical thing floating in the sky or by trying to corner God by saying if God was real why are their diseases like AIDS? Well first there are diseases like AIDS because of sun and by that I mean you get AIDS by having many different sexual partners. And what really proves there is a God is the fact that we're alive I mean we didnt come from Bacteria and if so what made it or if we evolved from Apes why are they still here? Or if the Earth was created by two rocks what made them? What made the air we breathe? There has to be something because if you said this to an Atheist they would become extremely defensive and couldn't answer any of those questions. Now to Agnosticism Agnosticism is basically not being sure of anything but its clear there is a God so that isn't the answer. Finally the one last thing you can say is well how can you be sure Christianity is the right religion and for that I say look up a guy named Kyle Butt on Google he makes videos about the Bible they're long but they really help with a lot of things including pricing the Bible is real. Last the only real thing you have to assume and take as fact is God is self existent instead of Athieisism where you assume out of nothing came something that made a bunch of rocks bash together possibly forming bacteria that evolved into us which somehow has values and that we evolved from Monkeys that still walk around today. See which sounds stupid now?

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Here's that guys video I think you have to have QuickTime to watch it it's on Apples website it's free too. Out With Doubt - Kyle Butt

 

[raven1]

Thanks for trying to help worried one. Even as I was reading this I had this cocky feeling come over me that athiesm is true and I didn't want to believe otherwise. I truly dont know which is right atheis or christianity. So I am afraid for my soul. I am doible minded.

 

[raven1]

It is funny. I had several pastors say doubt equals hell and one said faith and doubt always co exist. Um no before I had no doubt.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

See that's what happens to me even though that stuff I said makes perfect sense. What I usually have to do is talk to someone about everything. I talk to my Dad and Mom regularly about it. My Dad reassures me God is real he says look around you why is everything here why are you here? Why did your Mom and I come together and have you? What created the air we breathe? He says it's easier to believe than to not believe. You really need to check out those videos they helped me some. Regularly talk to someone it's a whole world of help.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

My Dad says doubts don't equal Hell. God understands all of this.

 

[gracealone]

Hi Worried One,
It's true, everything you said is logical and does make sense but you have to understand that you can't outlogic OCD. There's a broken fire alarm going off in your head that's making you feel that there is an emergency. That alarm system needs something to be alarmed about so that's how OCD latches on to different things. It needs something to chew on. I noticed that you said in spite of the fact that it all makes "sense" that you still "have" to talk to someone about everything." When you used the word "have" you were showing how OCD makes us feel compelled to still seek reassurance even though we have all this insight and knowledge. That's because the broken fire alarm pushes us to do so. So we seek reassurance. Seeking reassurance is the compulsion of our OCD. Then when we do that we validate the fear. We make it even more important and our brain becomes super sensitized to the theme of our OCD. Then what happens is that because people feel love and compassion for us and want to make us feel better they reassure us, like your wonderful Father does for you. He does this because he loves you. What he may not understand is that when he does that he's cooperating with your OCD and he's making your questions seem more and more valid, more and more worth paying attention to. This process gets them even more imbedded in your brain.
My husband understand how my OCD works so if he detects that I'm obsessing about something he refuses to reassure me about it. If he really wants to help me with it he does the polar opposite. For instance, if I said to him... "I'm really worried because I had this thought that God wasn't real and so now I'm not sure I'm a Christian" he might respond to me in this way; "Wow! Really? Yep I'd say you're doomed for sure!" He does this in kind of a light hearted mocking way and in doing so he's treating my obsession as invalid and not worthy of attention. That is what helps me and I thank the Lord that he knows this. If he starts to reassure me about it, I might get a temporary feeling of relief but it is short lived and I'll just keep on asking him for reassurance and thereby feed the monster of my OCD.
My little grandson has OCD. He's six years old. He gets stuck on different themes from time to time. Right now his mom is pregnant for his baby sister due in April. He obsesses about the baby and mostly about the delivery and her being in the hospital. He asks lots and lots of questions about it. He was going on and on about the scary hospital the other day and finally told my daughter that he wasn't going to visit his baby sister in the hospital when she was born. Now the instinctive thing for a parent to do in this matter would be to reassure him that everything would be OK if he came to the hospital and give him all sorts of reasons why. But my daughter knows better than to reassure him, so this is what she told him; "Yeah, you're right you probably shouldn't come to the hospital because they have nurses with shots hiding around every single corner just waiting for little boys to wander down the hall so they can jump out and give them shots." He looks at her for just one moment and then smiles and says... "you're just teasing me aren't you!" Then he drops the subject and goes back to playing. Just wanted to give a practical example of how to treat these obsessions effectively.
Praying for you.
Mitzi

See that's what happens to me even though that stuff I said makes perfect sense. What I usually have to do is talk to someone about everything. I talk to my Dad and Mom regularly about it. My Dad reassures me God is real he says look around you why is everything here why are you here? Why did your Mom and I come together and have you? What created the air we breathe? He says it's easier to believe than to not believe. You really need to check out those videos they helped me some. Regularly talk to someone it's a whole world of help.

 

[raven1]

I negate all apologetics though. I think how can good make something from nothing. The bible could be made up ect. I know it doesnt equal hell if my doubts are caused by ocd what I cant know is if they are. I cant believe like agnostics they doubt because they dont know just like me. You believe your doubt comes from ocd so you are ok if thst is true.True doubt is double mindedness God doesnt like it.

 

[TheWorriedOne]

Agnostics dont doubt they just don't know and don't care to know no matter what.

 

[gracealone]

Exactly!

Agnostics dont doubt they just don't know and don't care to know no matter what.

 

[gracealone]

But just like you I can't prove that my doubt comes from OCD I can only trust that it is based upon the fact that treating like OCD has helped me to get better. I didn't go into therapy convinced it was OCD or I wouldn't have needed therapy.... right?
Mitzi

I negate all apologetics though. I think how can good make something from nothing. The bible could be made up ect. I know it doesnt equal hell if my doubts are caused by ocd what I cant know is if they are. I cant believe like agnostics they doubt because they dont know just like me. You believe your doubt comes from ocd so you are ok if thst is true.True doubt is double mindedness God doesnt like it.

 

[kodadog1024]

Have you ever hoped for something ever in your life? Did you ever want to believe in something you weren't sure of, because you had to rely on something else for truth rather than your own being? Did you ever trust your mom or dad when they said everything was going to be ok when you thought different? Hopefully you loved them enough to feel that trust, even though you may be unsure, even though there was doubt, you just did it because they knew better. They knew things you didn't know or had experienced yet. I think the same goes with God and trust. Not being able to see Him, touch Him, feel Him. It becomes a struggle for me, and many others and now we have to rely on something we can't see, touch, hear, smell, or feel. It's reaching deep down beyond comprehension, letting go of what we cling to of this world and point our eyes to Heaven and say; "even though I have my doubts God, I am going to believe in you." That is action.

 

[raven1]

I can't kwno either though that is why I feel agnostic and i also sometimes dont care. Kodadog how can u believe when u doubt? Gracealone I understand what you are saying about treating the doubt God exists as OCD but what if I croak tommorow or on the date predicted for doomsday and this wasn't caused by OCD. I have a little over nine months to believe again because if it OCD doubt i am going to hell.