It's my first date

[jamandcrumpets]

The girl who is right for you is not going to give a thought to any of that... she will be able to look forward to building a future with you and growing together! Ignore it, no need to be peeved - she's a stranger to you and quite obviously not the right one for you either. We often look to ourselves and ask "what is wrong with me" when others don't act the way we think they should... it doesn't say anything about you, it only says something about her... she is still searching too. We are NEVER going to please everyone, so just go about doing what it is you need to do and be happy with yourself!

 

[BranwenUerchLlyr]

Any thoughts on this?

Weirdness. Probably not worth any more of your time. I've no experience with online dating sites, but I've heard a lot of strange stories. This would unfortunately be one of them.

 

[Ukrainia]

Weirdness. Probably not worth any more of your time. I've no experience with online dating sites, but I've heard a lot of strange stories. This would unfortunately be one of them.

Ya, I did send her a message after the date, but before I saw she changed her age basically saying that "even though I don't think either of us felt a connection, I had fun and I think it would be nice if we could remain friends" (those weren't my exact words, but close enough). But unless she answers back, I'm not planning on contacting her again. Also, I did make some first date faux pas, but even so, I don't think I gave her any reason to think I was anything but a nice, mature guy.

 

[MacFall]

Also, I did make some first date faux pas...

...You forgot to wear pants, didn't you.

 

[Ukrainia]

...You forgot to wear pants, didn't you.

That cuts a bit too close to the truth for comfort. I wore pants, but they were brand new and their was a tag on the back of them that I didn't see when I went to take all the tags off. So ya, it was small, so I can only hope she didn't see it.

 

[white dove]

I'm from Waukesha, just off I-94.

Barker or 164? I'm just kidding. You live in the web, I see. I was there a few weeks ago and realized just how beautiful some of those houses are. Crazy-steep streets though, jeez.


And don't worry, I think if any woman is really interested in a guy, she'd think it's cute to have a little tag hanging on the back of your butt - and plus, what's she looking there for, huh??? I hope for much better dating experiences for you and I can't wait to hear more about your okcupid stuff, too. It's one that I'm "trying."

 

[Ukrainia]

I heard back from the girl I went on a date with. She agreed with me that their was no spark between us. And she did say she had fun. So I'm taking her at her word and I'm not going to bring up the age change. If she wants to exclusively date older guys, that's her perogative.

 

[Ukrainia]

Barker or 164? I'm just kidding. You live in the web, I see. I was there a few weeks ago and realized just how beautiful some of those houses are. Crazy-steep streets though, jeez.


And don't worry, I think if any woman is really interested in a guy, she'd think it's cute to have a little tag hanging on the back of your butt - and plus, what's she looking there for, huh??? I hope for much better dating experiences for you and I can't wait to hear more about your okcupid stuff, too. It's one that I'm "trying."

I live on Barker near... hey wait, I've always limited my potential stalkers to soccer loving Brazillian Lutherans, whose favorite sci-fi book is Dune, have a deep yearning for a constant supply of bannana bread, German bratwurst and "so ugly they're cute" pugs. So yes, I do indeed have high standards for anyone who wants to camp out besides where I live and look into my room through a telescope. But hey, if you fit the qualifications go right ahead .

Ok Cupid, I think, is a good site. It's free and it helps to be proactive on the site. Hope it works for you!

 

[Im_A]

So I found something incredibly bizarre. I went back to the profile of the girl I went on a date with yesterday. And she changed her age on her profile. She used to put her age down as 22 (which I strongly believe is her actual age). Now she has changed it to 25 (later on in her profile she writes "the age I put down may or may not be my actual age" so I guess I wouldn't classify it as an outright lie). She also changed the age in the "What I'm Looking For" section to "guys ages 25 -40" (it used to be something like 23-35, but I don't remember the exact ages). I'm 24.

So this actually hurts a bit. As I said, it wasn't a great date. It was probably below average as far as dates go and I don't think either of us had any desire for a second date. But my assumption, after seeing that she changed her profile age one day after our date, is that she didn't find me mature enough or successful enough as to be someone she'd even consider. Therefore she's now looking exclusively for guys who are older than me. I find it the height of irony that she changed her age on OkCupid to look more mature, yet the act of pretending you are a different age from what you claim is, I think, quite childish.

Maybe their is more to this than meets the eye. But at first glance, this is frusterating to me. I do, admittedly, have many faults, but rarely can one say that immaturity is one of them. The other option is that I have achieved very little (I don't have a job in my field yet, nor do I own property) and she's looking for someone who is a bit more established.

While I won't stay angry about this for long, at the moment I'm legitimately peeved.

Any thoughts on this?

Honestly, it is an internet dating site. I wouldn't read too much about it as in regards to anything about you. Like you said, there was nothing there between you two and 3 years isn't going to be any different of a spark.

It could be her way of only going after certain aged men. Someone I met once online, had her age range set up on the dating site and I was a year younger. I asked her if I was too young and she said no. It didn't work out whatsoever even though we did have some fun dates but nevertheless, that age range could be something that she uses for herself and nothing meant to be aimed towards you.

Or she could flat out be weird with her age.

Glad you at least did have some fun.