I need him but hes not here

[dqhall]

I use to be a christian like 10 years ago and it seems like my mental health has degraded since then. Everything is getting worse like I almost went to the ER tonight. I miss my faith. I miss having god to talk to. I miss being apart of a community like this but... I have never needed him more in my life than I do tonight. Where is he though? At the same time in my past, Christianity is a big reason why I hate myself. The rules and stipulations. How is it that YOUR doctrine is correct but the guy sitting next to you isnt? The way other Christians act - its almost this brain washed phoney Im perfect type of way. The fact that God remains silent. There were years, and I still do I guess.. that I question his existence. I don’t understand the bible. God leaves it open for us to interpret but condemns people who are gay and other things. Hell too. Also why are we supposed to trust a book? I never really looked for answers because everytime I tried someone would quote the bible at me. Im not trying to insult anyone in this post I just thought maybe someone could give me advice. Where is God because I would really like to hear from him...

After an immoral lifestyle I sought the counsel of a pastor. I was advised to read the Gospel of John. This was good advice. While studying the Old Testament, I became more belligerent as it required the death penalty for non-violent offenses. I got lost again. It is not good enough to merely tell people to read the Bible. One may need to learn the faith required to receive prayer from God. Sermon on the Mount is a good passage.

 

[Lost4words]

Keep praying. Keep talking to God. Lay all your troubles at His feet. Offer up your sufferings to Him.

Be patient. Believe in God whatever you go through.

You need to dig in deep as sometimes the journey can be very bumpy.

God bless you

 

[NightDream]

God is not talking to people.

 

[Sanoy]

I've been through times like these, those 'dark nights of the soul'. You ask where He is during this time, and I can tell that you that. You are here today because you aren't in the ER, just as I was not in the ER in my dark night. Like you, I wanted Him to step in and overcome it for me, but He whispered "endure" over and over again. I am a better person today because that pain was allowed to last for several months. Further, you are here on this forum because He is right beside you drawing you back to Him. You did not get here on your own.

I think your experience with other Christians may have been with Pharisees. Listen to Jesus's parable in Luke 18:10-14.

“Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”​

God created both the world, and you to live in that world. He knows what is best for you because He designed you and your environment and He knows what will harm you and what will flourish you. His commands are for your sake, because the things outside those commands, those things themselves lead to death. We were made to drink living water, IE God's nature, and when we part from that we starve and diminish. His commands are not as you imagine them to be - "do this or don't do that!". His commands are "drink from me, the source of life", and not from these other streams because those streams will poison you unto death.

 

[NightDream]

His commands are not as you imagine them to be - "do this or don't do that!".

It is, you must read God's law and commandments and do what they say.

 

[Sanoy]

It is, you must read God's law and commandments and do what they say.

What you quoted isn't a standalone sentence but must be paired with the next sentence. What I am saying is that he is not commanding arbitrary duties, "do this or don't do that!". Rather, the meaning behind the commands is for your own sake, not to arbitrarily hinder your activities.

 

[com7fy8]

Im not talking about a voice but you know 100% that its from him.

Well, since you are not perfectly the way we can be with Jesus, you are not perfectly able to know when you are hearing God's voice.

While I was an evil person, on purpose, I heard God saying things to me, I would now say. But I did not know it was God. And Jesus has spoken personally to Satan; so you do not have to be a perfect person to hear Him, but we need how God makes us able to know He is speaking with us, and God makes us able to appreciate and benefit from hearing Him.

But, like I offer > God is not silent, but quiet. And God's word says >

"rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God." (1 Peter 3:4)

So, from this I trust that we can please God and be in sharing with Him, by being gentle and quiet . . . in His gentle and quiet love. But if we are in what is not quiet and pleasant love, we can fail to know when God is speaking to us or we can fail to benefit.

And unforgiveness keeps us away from this love. Plus, God's love is all-loving; so if we are being selfish, loving only or mainly people we hope to use, this keeps us not with God in His all-loving love.

Another thing > God has example people to reach you. He can be speaking when a person of Jesus loving is sharing with you. He can speak through a person's quietness and kindness, too, when someone is not saying a word. Actions can speak louder than words, it has been said.

And His kindness in us can change us to be encouraged and caring > this proves what words alone can not prove < how Jesus is able to change us to have "rest for your souls" > in Matthew 11:28-30.

 

[Jesslyn]

Why do I have to hate myself in order to be a christian? I already hate myself enough.

 

[Jesslyn]

It is, you must read God's law and commandments and do what they say.

Please no christian bickering in my thread.

 

[Jesslyn]

Also youre having faith that your feelings and thoughts are from god? So there is no 100%?

 

[Jesslyn]

I appreciate everyone responding. Ive been on other Christian forums and they would act like im some diseased entity because I said I wasnt a christian. Im just looking for answers. Im so depressed. Im so lonely. Im so tired of lifes [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. I wish god would put me out of my misery but he wont.

 

[com7fy8]

Why do I have to hate myself in order to be a christian? I already hate myself enough.

God does not hate you; and we have our command to love others as we love ourselves. So, God wants us to love everyone.

But the word "hate" can mean to reject and not trust how we have been in our selfish ways. So, it means to hate how we have been selfish, but trust God to change us so we love the way He wants.

 

[com7fy8]

Also youre having faith that your feelings and thoughts are from god? So there is no 100%?

I trust God to have me feeling and thinking what He wants. And so, I seek Him for the correction I need so I am so sharing with Him in love's ways of feeling and thinking.

And so, of course, this means to hate myself, meaning to hate how I have been as a person unable to connect with God . . . but trusting Him to change me into a humble and kind person.

Is there 100%? At times, God might give us a sample of how we can become. But then we need to grow in our %, in hope of getting there and staying there all the time.

God's love is 100% . . . loving a hundred percent of us. Such loving is better than proof that people are trying to get. So, what they want 100% can be limiting them.

 

[Tone]

I appreciate everyone responding. Ive been on other Christian forums and they would act like im some diseased entity because I said I wasnt a christian. Im just looking for answers. Im so depressed. Im so lonely. Im so tired of lifes [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse]. I wish god would put me out of my misery but he wont.

You might appreciate this thread:

Who Wants To Live Forever? Ethics of Immortality

 

[com7fy8]

Im just looking for answers. Im so depressed. Im so lonely. Im so tired of

There are people worth staying here to love.

We have a number of people claiming to be Christians, who want to die so they can go to Heaven. But Jesus came from Heaven, in order to reach us and love us and share with us, here. And Jesus came to love enemies, not only certain favorite people.

So, trusting His example can mean staying here for a while But only God can make us strong in His grace so this is good for us.

I think of how our Apostle Paul had such a hard problem > his "thorn in the flesh" > 2 Corinthians 12:7-15. He begged Jesus to make it go away; but Jesus let it stay, it seems; but Jesus told Paul that Christ's grace is sufficient, and His "strength is made perfect in weakness."

God communicates by means of His grace, even while He may not say something to us. His grace effects us in our character so we are sharing with Him so we are sharing in how He loves and forgives. And this grace satisfies us to stay

 

[Sanoy]

Why do I have to hate myself in order to be a christian? I already hate myself enough.

We have this in common. I deeply dislike myself, but that isn't apart of me being a Christian but me not being what I think I should be. Jesus tells us the work of a Christian, "Believe in me"

“This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” - John 6:29​

All that I should be is one that believes, and it is that belief which avails my spirit of the transformative power of the Holy Spirit, to change me from the inside out. To overcome my conflicting thoughts with heavenly thoughts. To change my desires to heavenly things.

Faith means trust, we trust in God to act according to His nature and fulfill His promises. It is the Holy Spirit who affirms to our Spirit that we are Children of God. You might ask, but how? How do you know you're off balance when you are? You just do right? Something in your consciousness lets you know. That is very similar to this.

Jesslyn, would you consider going to Church this Sunday? To some place where the Love of God can be seen so that you are not lonely this season?

​

 

[Jesslyn]

We have this in common. I deeply dislike myself, but that isn't apart of me being a Christian but me not being what I think I should be. Jesus tells us the work of a Christian, "Believe in me"

“This is the work of God, that you believe in him whom he has sent.” - John 6:29​

All that I should be is one that believes, and it is that belief which avails my spirit of the transformative power of the Holy Spirit, to change me from the inside out. To overcome my conflicting thoughts with heavenly thoughts. To change my desires to heavenly things.

Faith means trust, we trust in God to act according to His nature and fulfill His promises. It is the Holy Spirit who affirms to our Spirit that we are Children of God. You might ask, but how? How do you know you're off balance when you are? You just do right? Something in your consciousness lets you know. That is very similar to this.

Jesslyn, would you consider going to Church this Sunday? To some place where the Love of God can be seen so that you are not lonely this season?

​

Ive been thinking about it. I dont like talking to people though. Rofl

 

[Sanoy]

Ive been thinking about it. I dont like talking to people though. Rofl

I think you should, talking can really help.

 

[Tone]

I think you should, talking can really help.

I like posting more than talking...

 

[NightDream]

Please no christian bickering in my thread.

Stop with this!