I am an Agnostic/Buddhist who attends a Methodist church. If they found out, what would they think?

[Albion]

My guess, Scott, is that word has indeed gotten around. But how much this matters is hard to say. It's obviously not scandalous or else something would have been said about it to you. And Methodists are generally easy-going people not nearly as given to being doctrinal hardliners as are the members of some other denominations. So if this is your concern, it's probably not as big a deal as you fear.

On the other hand, I see no reason to come out of any closet. Many people who are tolerant do take offense if the dissenter acts like he's determined to have a confrontation--which is what a public declaration could seem to some people to be.

And there's one more thing. You say you have attended SC and HC. But are you a communicant member? If 'no,' I'd say there's little reason to worry about this. But if you are a member, you made a Christian commitment, and if you didn't mean it, that could be an issue with some members and ought to be one with you, too.

So. I've been Agnostic my entire adult life. In 2009 I started following the path of Buddhism, which does not believe or disbelieve in any God. Since 2010, I have been attending churches with my family (My fiancee and now 3 children). We used to go to one church, we will call it SC, from around 2010-2014. Now since 2014 we have been going to another church, let's call it HC. The churches are both Methodist and are considered "sister churches", and lots of the members from each church know members at the other church.

Around 2012, at SC, my Sunday school class did a study on Christianity and World religions. I decided to teach the lesson on Buddhism. In the process I also "came out of the closet" to my Sunday school class. I was scared, and wasn't sure what they would think... But you know what, they were really nice and supportive. I was surprised, and it was cool. However, this was just a small group of about 8 people. I'm not really sure if word spread to the rest of the church. (Small church where around 60 people show up every week). We never really talked about it much after that. What do you think, did word spread?

Anyway, at the new church, HC, I am getting more active and actually play percussion every week during service. This church is slightly larger with about 80 people who show up every week.

I have never officially come out of the closet at HC, and I am scared to do so. What will they think? Will they not like me any more? Will they want me to stop playing the percussion?

My other question is: Since many of the people at both churches know each other, what is the percent chance that most everybody at HC already knows about me anyway?

And do I need to come out of the closet at HC? If so, when, where and how? Would it be appropriate for me to do a "testimonial" of sorts?

Thanks for your advice and wisdom.

Peace
Scott

 

[GracetotheHumble]

In the LCMS church he would not be allowed to commune at our alter.

 

[Albion]

Well, I'm one who didn't answer what you are saying "we all" did, GV.

In addition, we weren't asked about him being a worshipper at our own churches; we were explicitly asked what we thought HIS church would think or do. Not all the answers kept that in mind, but that's how the answer should have been framed.

It is one thing to allow someone who identifies as a visitor and is considering joining. But the OP is a Budhist and for some reason feels like everyone needs to know it. Are you all sympathiZing with him because he used the term "come out of the closet?" Don't you get that that's just a logical fallacy designed to appeal to your emotions? You feel like sympathizing with him because it immediately reminds you of a gay person. And you all seem to think that gay people are invariably mistreated and abused at every church that doesn't affirm homosexuality--which, I might want to point out, was likely your own church not long ago. So you're led to sympathize with him all because of his choice of words. Why do people fall for this kind of rhetoric? I don't think the OP was deliberately trying to manipulate your emotions, but it's still so pathetic to me, honestly, that you feel the need to literally say "how wonderful!" At the prospect of a Budhist going to a church that is reserved for Christians.

A church is meant to be a gathering place for believers, or at the very least those being introduced to the Christian faith. The OP seems comfortable being a Budhist and wants to still be one in a Christian environment, for reasons I do 't understand. If it has something to do with diversity, then don't try and explain it to me.

There is nothing "intolerant" about telling a Budhist in a Christian church about Jesus and offering him the chance to learn about Christianity. What is UN-Christian is to just let him sit there and expect him to somehow accept Jesus on his own. Clearly he doesn't want to do it unless he has to because he has a very different idea of religious faith then myself, and possibly you as well, but the way you liberal Christians are I have no idea. Doing what St. Francis of Assissi said is just garbage. You cannot expect someone to just understand Christ unless they are told. And I know that you liberal Christians are afraid of that because you're afraid of being ostracized in society. But God never said that life would be easy, or that we'd come to agree with the world on things. We Christians are naturally at odds with the world, and trying to pretend like we're not just leads to a watered-down, dead faith that only exists to keep you in this delusional state of happiness.

 

[paul1149]

Why do liberal Christians feel this need to just let everyone into their churches, including people that aren't Christians?

In the book of Acts, we see the early church coming under persecution. So much so that most people were afraid to go out in public with the apostles. As a result the church began to forsake the temple and focus on its house-to-house meetings. It was at this time that the Stephanic persecution arose, with zealots like Saul of Tarsus rounding up Christians and condemning them to death. You can bet that Christians at that time became more careful of their witness and of their church invitations.

We have a modern-day parallel of this with the church in persecuted lands such as China (see "the cross in china" series on youtube). They would meet out in fields or in barns or caves at night, and post sentries to watch for the police. In the videos you will indeed see the most amazing intense worship.

I say that just to give some perspective on the question. And I think there's a very good chance that this is the direction the church in the West is, at least to some extent, headed.

Now to the original question. In a word, I would suggest you focus less on what the church folk think, which ultimately means little, and more on what God thinks, which means everything. He wants you to be sincere with these people. You are apparently participating in worship music. You need only please an audience of One. Make sure your conscience is clear before Him.

 

[grandvizier1006]

Well, I'm one who didn't answer what you are saying "we all" did, GV.

In addition, we weren't asked about him being a worshipper at our own churches; we were explicitly asked what we thought HIS church would think or do. Not all the answers kept that in mind, but that's how the answer should have been framed.

I guess I was using exaggeration. Sorry.

 

[Albion]

I guess I was using exaggeration. Sorry.

No. I didn't mean it as a criticism exactly. Just that there has been some division of opinion among the answers that have been given so far.

 

[PloverWing]

On Word and Sacraments:

I think some of you misunderstand what we do in the Episcopal Church.

Our worship is very much oriented around Word and Sacraments. On a typical Sunday morning, you will hear 2-3 chapters of the Bible read in church. We celebrate the Eucharist almost every Sunday, and at some mid-week services as well.

We believe that we experience God's holy presence and grace both in the reading of the Word and in Holy Communion. It is exactly for that reason that I never want to turn someone away from our worship. Who am I to turn someone away from God's presence? There are millstones for that.

So come, watch what we do, watch what God does in our midst, join in if you can.

On "coming out":

None of this has anything to do with LGBT issues. The only reason that the phrase is used is that being a Buddhist is something you can hide if you choose. The original poster is trying to decide whether he can trust his church enough to confide in them about his beliefs. If he can't trust them, he may choose to stay hidden.

I'm sympathetic to this dilemma because I have been the dissenting outsider on occasion. I have been in groups of Christians who disagree with me, and I have sometimes chosen to keep my dissent to myself, if I think the rejection will be too harsh.

On supporting his fiancee:

I praised the original poster for supporting his fiancee and children in their Christian faith, because I can imagine the alternative. A different husband might ridicule Christianity, or else might stay home and let the rest of the family go to church without him. But he's there with his family, going to church with them, actively helping them to practice their faith. How very, wonderfully supportive.

 

[Albion]

I'm sympathetic to this dilemma because I have been the dissenting outsider on occasion. I have been in groups of Christians who disagree with me, and I have sometimes chosen to keep my dissent to myself, if I think the rejection will be too harsh.

This is more than the usual kind of disagreements among Christians, though. For one thing, one of the folks doing the disagreeing isn't a Christian.

On supporting his fiancee:

I praised the original poster for supporting his fiancee and children in their Christian faith, because I can imagine the alternative. A different husband might ridicule Christianity, or else might stay home and let the rest of the family go to church without him. But he's there with his family, going to church with them, actively helping them to practice their faith. How very, wonderfully supportive.

Yes, I think we're all in agreement on that--as far as it goes. But his problem is that he's taken a much bigger role in the congregation than just a family member who accompanies other people to church. And he values that role (or roles).

 

[RickardoHolmes]

Paul 1149 has the best advice, focus less on what people think and more on what God thinks......

The most welcomed I have ever felt at any church in recent times was at a Methodist church where they started by saying "We welcome all, believers and non believers alike"
There is a Methodist church here, we went to an early Christmas service last year at my sons request. I did not care for it, but he loved it. They did not ask any questions as to who we were or what we believe. I have found that some people in certain churches act as gatekeepers to screen anyone as to what they believe, perhaps to facilitate the persecution anyone who is different. In the end, I really don't care what others believe, so long as their beliefs do not threaten me, my rights, or my safety. I live my life dealing with what I have learned and found to be true. I live by Loving others, being a part of the solution, not part of the problem. If someone does not like or agree with what I do, so what? I am violating no laws and doing no harm.
Since we are all different, Scott, my experiences have given me different beliefs, but that does not make us right or wrong; it is just the way it is. If someone at a church feels threatened by your faith, remember that they are just expressing their own self-doubt, their own self fears. They need to focus on the Right Paths to find true happiness.

 

[ToBeLoved]

In the LCMS church he would not be allowed to commune at our alter.

But what if he kept it secret? That's what it seems that the OP has done and only come out to his sunday school because of a class on Buddaism that he taught.

 

[Dirk1540]

Buddhism isn't really a religion in the way that Christianity is. I love Buddha principles!! I love how peaceful it is. For me 'Religion' is more of a question of what happens after this life.

 

[Albion]

But what if he kept it secret? That's what it seems that the OP has done and only come out to his sunday school because of a class on Buddaism that he taught.

Yes. I too thought that this was the issue.

Buddhism isn't really a religion in the way that Christianity is. I love Buddha principles!! I love how peaceful it is. For me 'Religion' is more of a question of what happens after this life.

..."not in the way" Christianity is, but it's still a different religion--and not one that acknowledges the God of the Bible. So for our inquirer, this remains a serious matter.

 

[Dirk1540]

But isn't Buddhism more of a philosophy on how to live than a religion? For instance, Islam, Christianity, Mormon, etc, all are leaning towards a purpose and the 'Next step' after this life. I feel like Buddhism may as well be like Tony Robbins giving you a feel good pep talk. There is no 'God' of Buddhism. I almost feel like we are in an argument of semantics. If somebody (Buddha) tells you how to minimize stress, to keep a calm demeanor, etc...is that religion?? It may as well be advice from your wise neighbor who lives 3 doors down. There is no God.

I think they talk about the impersonal universe and the circle of life (no God)...ok that is a no go...so I guess I'm just saying if you were to ONLY teach the behavioral principles of Buddha it would be fine.

 

[Albion]

But isn't Buddhism more of a philosophy on how to live than a religion? For instance, Islam, Christianity, Mormon, etc, all are leaning towards a purpose and the 'Next step' after this life. I feel like Buddhism may as well be like Tony Robbins giving you a feel good pep talk. There is no 'God' of Buddhism. I almost feel like we are in an argument of semantics.

Your understanding is correct, but it's still considered a religion because it deals with the issues of creation, the afterlife, ethics, and etc. that the Tony Robbins work with "how to minimize stress, to keep a calm demeanor, etc." does not.

I guess I'm just saying if you were to ONLY teach the behavioral principles of Buddha it would be fine.

Probably, but that wouldn't really be Buddhism IMHO. It would be something derived from Buddhism or inspired by Buddhism, and it would depend on exactly what aspects of Buddhism we're talking about. Reincarnation, for instance, would be a theological proposition. Other aspects of Buddhist thinking would not be.

 

[Steven Wood]

A good and healthy church is more than willing to have non-believers visit, spend time, and even participate (at least in part) with worship. I say in part because it depends on what the church's policy is in regard to Communion, whether it is Closed or Open. For example, at my ELCA church we have a policy of Open Communion, every Sunday service when we celebrate the Lord's Supper the pastor makes an open invitation to come and partake because it is first and foremost Christ's Table, not our table. It's really then a matter of how comfortable one is communing, especially if they understand what we believe about the Sacrament (that is, we believe it to be the very real and actual flesh and blood of Jesus, we're not receiving mere bread and wine, but the Lord Jesus Himself); if one prefers they can when they go up to the altar rail ask instead to receive a blessing--nobody's gonna judge you either way.

But other Lutheran churches, such as the LCMS, have Closed Communion, technically not even I--though a Lutheran--would be allowed to commune without first having a one-on-one discussion with the pastor about it. The same, I imagine, would be true of other churches of other traditions.

But even if you can't share in the Supper at the church, most churches would be happy to have anyone really come and experience the service.

Some churches may become aggressive in their proselytizing efforts, but not all. Not all Christians have the same understanding of what evangelism is supposed to be, many understand evangelism isn't about trying to aggressively make others convert, but is instead about being open about their faith with the implicit trust that it's God who converts the heart, not people.

As far as the Methodist church you attend goes, it would seem from what you said that people there probably would be quite accepting of you. It's certainly what I believe a good church should do because I believe that represents the ministry of Christ to the world. Not aggressively proselytizing, but being emissaries of the Gospel.

-CryptoLutheran

Unfortunately Not all "christians" knows what it truly means to be a true disciple of our Lord and Savior. My Lord taught me me all I needed to know and what I learned is he not only taught in the Synagogues but also out in the open for everyone to hear and it didn't matter who they were and even when he was telling people like the Gentile woman that the miracles were not for them it was only a test of faith. Man does not convert anyone but we preach by the wisdom of the Holy spirit and if people's hearts are open they'll hear and accept the Lord and ask forgiveness and only then. It doesn't matter what faith they are and it doesn't work any other way with any other right or ritual. It truly is a shame that "christians" have so little faith that they're afraid to let people of other faiths in to their church because they are so scared that some may get converted to different beliefs but they aren't even giving that person a reason to convert. This man has a family, Has been going to a church, taught a class on his religion, not to mention this church taught about other world religions and he's still Buddhist? It's been years and what does that say as us as Christians? Jesus convinced people in seconds. MATTHEW 7:22. Though many are called few are chosen. I say friend have no fear of who you are and what you believe and let these people do their best to preach to you after all it is their mission and you are at a church. Buddhists don't get offended at the thought of God and they shouldn't be offended by you they should however talk welcome you and talk to you but you should not have a right teaching them I don't believe they should be teaching other world religions either that is a house of God the father and the father alone Jesus would've made a whip and drove people out.

 

[Steven Wood]

This is ridiculous. Why do liberal Christians feel this need to just let everyone into their churches, including people that aren't Christians? It is one thing to allow someone who identifies as a visitor and is considering joining. But the OP is a Budhist and for some reason feels like everyone needs to know it. Are you all sympathiZing with him because he used the term "come out of the closet?" Don't you get that that's just a logical fallacy designed to appeal to your emotions? You feel like sympathizing with him because it immediately reminds you of a gay person. And you all seem to think that gay people are invariably mistreated and abused at every church that doesn't affirm homosexuality--which, I might want to point out, was likely your own church not long ago. So you're led to sympathize with him all because of his choice of words. Why do people fall for this kind of rhetoric? I don't think the OP was deliberately trying to manipulate your emotions, but it's still so pathetic to me, honestly, that you feel the need to literally say "how wonderful!" At the prospect of a Budhist going to a church that is reserved for Christians.

A church is meant to be a gathering place for believers, or at the very least those being introduced to the Christian faith. The OP seems comfortable being a Budhist and wants to still be one in a Christian environment, for reasons I do 't understand. If it has something to do with diversity, then don't try and explain it to me.

There is nothing "intolerant" about telling a Budhist in a Christian church about Jesus and offering him the chance to learn about Christianity. What is UN-Christian is to just let him sit there and expect him to somehow accept Jesus on his own. Clearly he doesn't want to do it unless he has to because he has a very different idea of religious faith then myself, and possibly you as well, but the way you liberal Christians are I have no idea. Doing what St. Francis of Assissi said is just garbage. You cannot expect someone to just understand Christ unless they are told. And I know that you liberal Christians are afraid of that because you're afraid of being ostracized in society. But God never said that life would be easy, or that we'd come to agree with the world on things. We Christians are naturally at odds with the world, and trying to pretend like we're not just leads to a watered-down, dead faith that only exists to keep you in this delusional state of happiness.

I'm exactly with you on the world not being easy. I never go with the status quo, I want no part of the world or anything with it, I get my fair share of foul looks due to lack of "pc" ness. As a matter of fact most so-called "christians" hate what I have to say because I call them on their "feel good" non-sense but as far as the op goes I see absolutely no problem with him going to a church. He has a christian family and the Bible clearly says if a Godly husband or wife has an ungodly spouse and it's ok with them than it's fine and if he's going maybe on account of them you never know maybe someday something will strike a chord with him. Plus I'll put it this way to you. Never once in the whole time when Jesus was preaching did he ever speak up and call someone out and say "Hey, you don't believe in my father. Get outta here, you can't listen". It doesn't matter if someone sat down and listened to him everyday he preached, he never kicked him out, even the Pharisees and they didn't believe in him. All are welcome become everyone that has ever been or ever will be has been saved, just not everyone has been forgiven because not everyone has asked. He may still My friend you know what I mean? It depends on If the ones in the church he's at ever start doing their Job.

 

[ToBeLoved]

..

 

[grandvizier1006]

I'm exactly with you on the world not being easy. I never go with the status quo, I want no part of the world or anything with it, I get my fair share of foul looks due to lack of "pc" ness. As a matter of fact most so-called "christians" hate what I have to say because I call them on their "feel good" non-sense but as far as the op goes I see absolutely no problem with him going to a church. He has a christian family and the Bible clearly says if a Godly husband or wife has an ungodly spouse and it's ok with them than it's fine and if he's going maybe on account of them you never know maybe someday something will strike a chord with him. Plus I'll put it this way to you. Never once in the whole time when Jesus was preaching did he ever speak up and call someone out and say "Hey, you don't believe in my father. Get outta here, you can't listen". It doesn't matter if someone sat down and listened to him everyday he preached, he never kicked him out, even the Pharisees and they didn't believe in him. All are welcome become everyone that has ever been or ever will be has been saved, just not everyone has been forgiven because not everyone has asked. He may still My friend you know what I mean? It depends on If the ones in the church he's at ever start doing their Job.

Yeah, good point. I was really mad when I posted that. Since then I've come to understand the concept just a bit better. I guess I just let fears of "contamination" get the better of me.

 

[ToBeLoved]

I'm exactly with you on the world not being easy. I never go with the status quo, I want no part of the world or anything with it, I get my fair share of foul looks due to lack of "pc" ness. As a matter of fact most so-called "christians" hate what I have to say because I call them on their "feel good" non-sense but as far as the op goes I see absolutely no problem with him going to a church. He has a christian family and the Bible clearly says if a Godly husband or wife has an ungodly spouse and it's ok with them than it's fine and if he's going maybe on account of them you never know maybe someday something will strike a chord with him. Plus I'll put it this way to you. Never once in the whole time when Jesus was preaching did he ever speak up and call someone out and say "Hey, you don't believe in my father. Get outta here, you can't listen". It doesn't matter if someone sat down and listened to him everyday he preached, he never kicked him out, even the Pharisees and they didn't believe in him. All are welcome become everyone that has ever been or ever will be has been saved, just not everyone has been forgiven because not everyone has asked. He may still My friend you know what I mean? It depends on If the ones in the church he's at ever start doing their Job.

But that isn't what he did.

He didn't identify himself in any way as being a Buddhist. He kept it a secret.

So, I'm not seeing what this opinion has to do with the thread at all.

One thing I would say to the OP is that I hope that he did not partake in the Lord's Supper, because I think God would have a serious issue with that if was not a believer. I think somewhere in the Bible it may also talk about people getting ill from this.

 

[Steven Wood]

But that isn't what he did.

He didn't identify himself in any way as being a Buddhist. He kept it a secret.

So, I'm not seeing what this opinion has to do with the thread at all.

One thing I would say to the OP is that I hope that he did not partake in the Lord's Supper, because I think God would have a serious issue with that if was not a believer. I think somewhere in the Bible it may also talk about people getting ill from this.

So To you what's more important, keeping a secret from the church for fear that he would not be able to spend the time there with his family,and be shunned or thinking that he's keeping a secret from God who already knows? What has he really done? Did he sin against the church or God? We all sin against God. If he hasn't accepted Christ he isn't forgiven so it doesn't matter what he does(in our belief, no reports necessary lol) and also if he hasn't what place should he be other than church? And as for partaking in Communion I'll tell you this. Sacrifices of the Old Testament once meant something until they became a stench in the Lord's nostrils. Just as man can make anything if not done by faith it is meaningless.